I have not seen the vast majority of the series, nor have I read the manga. I've seen a bit over half the episodes of the first season and written fanfics, and that is what I'm going off of. So pardon any inaccuracies.
The Time Has Come (Pikachu's Good-Bye) belongs to whoever owns the English version of Pokémon. Mild shounen-ai.
Penned by D.A. Maxwell
Begun & Completed 03.29.2002
The Time Has Come
{ I close my eyes, and I can see the day we met }
{ Just one moment and I knew }
{ You're my best friend, do anything for you }
: : FLASHBACK : :
"Satoshi, be CAREFUL!" Hanako advised as her four year old son took off towards the playground.
"Haiii!" Satoshi called back. He stopped abruptly in front of the swingset and eyed it with sparkling, eager young eyes before gingerly seating himself down on one. After watching other children swing for a few seconds, he backed up before letting himself fall free, mimicking their starting actions. A grin broke through the serious look in his small face and he laughed gleefully as he began to kick, soaring higher and higher.
With growing fascination, the small boy watched as older and more experienced swingers reached high altitudes- only to leap off and land safely on the ground. As he swung, climbing higher and higher still, Satoshi glanced nervously at the ground. It looked so far away, and if he fell, he was vaguely aware that it would hurt. But nobody else was falling, were they?
He glanced over at his mother to see that she was preoccupied, chatting with an old famiily friend. Ookido-hakase, wasn't it? He'd been to the Ookido estate a few times- it was enormous, but way too fanciful for a toddler's taste, which was what he had been.
Satoshi took a deep breath. It was now or never, for he'd surely lose the courage to fly without wings.
Hanako glanced over at her offspring just in time to catch a scared but delighted expression on his face as his body pulled away from the swing. Her eyes widened in horror, but she felt frozen in place as he fell-
Right into the open arms of Shigeru, Ookido-hakase's only grandson.
Hanako and the professor leaped up and began to run to the two boys. Oblivious to his mother's concern, Satoshi beamed and threw himself around his saviour. "Arigatou!" he squeaked happily. He was safe after all, and it was all because of this pretty little boy!
Shigeru blinked at the hug. "Aa... dou itashimashite," he responded, unsure of what to do to the child clinging to him. Fortunately for him, he didn't have to make a decision because Satoshi pulled back to smile brightly at him. He had such an open, happy smile, so bright that it seemed to shine right through his dark eyes.
"I'm Satoshi!" the boy said, holding out a hand. Shigeru looked at it for a second before taking it, a smile breaking out on his own face.
"Ookido Shigeru."
"Nice to meet ya, Geru-chan!" Satoshi piped cheerfully. Shigeru started at the name- no one, not even his sister, had ever called him by anything other than "Shigeru", but he found he liked it. "Do you come here a lot? Maybe we can play together! We can be bestestest friends!"
Friends. Shigeru had never really had a friend- the few other kids he had seen thought that he was too quiet, and a freak because of it. Truth be told, he hadn't been fond of them either- they were so stupid, always crying and clinging to their mommies. He didn't see the point in a mommy- he had never had one, and he was fine, wasn't he?
But he liked Satoshi. And he found that he couldn't deny anything to the hopeful face in front of him. Grinning, he tilted his head to the side as their guardians rushed up. "Sure."
: : END FLASHBACK : :
Satoshi blinked awake just in time to see darkness cover the bright morning's sun. Kasumi glowered at him.
"Get up, lazybutt! I swear, Satoshi, I don't know how you get anything done, sleeping late all the time!" the redhead snapped, but Satoshi knew she wasn't really angry. So he chose to ignore her and roll over, closing his eyes again and thinking back to his dream.
Or rather, memory. Memory of the day he had met his former best friend. His rival.
{ We've come so far and done so much }
{ And I feel like we've always been together }
Feeding Pikachu, Satoshi smiled fondly at the golden rodent. He knew that no matter how many Pokémon he caught, he would never, ever forget the day he found his permanent partner.
But it hurt, too, remembering. Up until that day, Shigeru had still been his best friend... but when he arrived at Ookido-hakase's laboratory late, the brunette was being uncharacteristically nasty and superior, and hadn't improved since. Satoshi had never understood the change, but opted not to ask Takeshi about it, even though the former gym leader was like an older brother to him. Neither he nor Kasumi could possibly understand. They had never known the kind, friendly Shigeru that had saved him that day years ago at the park. They only knew the arrogant, fiercely competitive adolescent of today.
The night before he met one best friend and lost another, he had stayed up late, thinking. He and Shigeru had always dreamed of the moment when they would become Pokémon masters, and they shared a common dream. It never occurred to him that this dream would be what tore them apart. He had reminisced on the hours of quiet talks with his ex-friend, going through all the adventures that they had gotten themselves into as kids. Now that they were going to be Pokémon trainers, it wouldn't be any different, right? They'd still do everything together and share everything. Right?
But somehow, that had not happened.
"Pikapi?"
Satoshi jerked back to reality to see all three of his companions- two human and one mouse- staring at him with concern. "Satoshi, daijoubu?" Takeshi asked.
He chuckled a bit with embarrassment. "Aa, hai, hai! I'm fine, just spacing," he replied sheepishly. Kasumi snorted. This was more like the baka that she knew.
"Well, considering how much empty space there is in your head, that's no surprise," she retorted.
As Satoshi yelped back in annoyance, Takeshi listened to the familiar insults being tossed back and forth and watched his black-haired "otouto" with curiosity. The Pokémaster-in-training had been unusually quiet and serious lately, and often seemed to get lost in his thoughts, and the mothering nature in Takeshi couldn't help but worry for his friend.
{ Right by my side, through thick and thin }
{ You're the part of my life I'll always remember }
Leaving Celadon City with a new badge in his collection, Satoshi grinned as he chatted amiably with Kasumi. Even though he hadn't won by fighting, the badge was his because of his natural instinct to always help others, just as Shigeru had helped him their first day.
Shigeru.
Even now, with so many petty quarrels between them, Satoshi missed his friend dearly. Although he had been rather annoyed to hear from Ookido-hakase that once again, Shigeru had pulled ahead of him with his number of Pokémon, he knew that, despite what Kasumi and Takeshi thought, he couldn't really hate Shigeru. They had been too close, and it had only been a few months since their friendship died. The wound was still too deep for hate.
And as silly as it was- he could never tell his friends this- when he had gone back into the building to rescue the Gloom, he had wanted to simply turn around and run back. But the memory of Shigeru was what made him keep going; it had felt as though his rival were the same old person again, running alongside him and encouraging him when everybody else shot him down because he was so scrawny and weak all the time.
But now, it was Shigeru who shot him down, and as much as his friends tried telling him it didn't matter- as much as he tried telling himself it didn't matter- he knew that it did, and on a level his friends couldn't possibly understand.
{ The time has come }
{ It's for the best, I know it }
He had begun giving himself regular mental pep talks each night as he drifted off to sleep.
~ Oi, Satoshi no baka, give up on the guy already, will ya? ~ his voice of reason insisted. ~ He obviously doesn't give a damn about you anymore. He's the one who threw you away like leftovers! You don't need him! ~
= Nani? What are you telling yourself, jari-booi? It's not in your nature to give up on friends so easily, especially your best friends! =
~ Hey, he's the jerk that ditched me, it's not like I can go begging him to be my friend again! ~
= And why not? He's worth it, isn't he? I should be doing everything I CAN to get his friendship back! What kind of idiot lets his best friend walk away from him without an explanation? =
~... my kind of idiot, apparently.~
Needless to say, he did not get very much sleep. When he did manage to be blessed by the Sandman, all he had been dreaming of lately were searing sneers and ghosts of faint smiles. A cool breeze with the scent of the one who had left him behind. A leaf brushing by with the same soft touch.
And fire surrounding him as the familiar silhouette walked away.
{ Who could have guessed that you and I }
{ Somehow, some way }
{ We'd have to say good-bye }
At one of the many small towns that the trio stopped in during their journey, Satoshi woke up early to take a walk by himself before sneaking back into bed. Heaven forbid that Kasumi know he was capable of getting up without her incessant wailing, or she may think he had some degree of responsibility.
He began to hear something- it sounded like voices. In the park? At five a.m.?
Following his ears, he came into a clearing where two kids were arguing- they looked about eight or nine. Between them lay a broken necklace. His heart stopped for a moment. Was it a...?
A mental image of a familiar, green and yellow yin-yang flashed through his mind. He blinked and shook his head, clearing the memory. Looking again, he saw that it was indeed a yin-yang, but the customary black and white one. The clasp was broken, he noticed.
He looked up to hear the conversation.
"I hate you! I never told you to break it!" one screamed with a dark scowl. She was a little girl with black hair who reminded him of Natsume.
The boy with curly blonde locks glared back. "Don't blame me! You said I could see it, and then you didn't let go!"
"Don't blame me, jerk! You're the one that pulled it, and now it's broken, and it's all your fault!" chibi-Natsume shrieked back.
Satoshi winced at the screech, but the pain was quickly dulled at his horror when the blonde burst into tears. Alarmed, he stepped forward.
Both kids turned to look at him suspiciously. "What do you want?" the girl demanded shrilly.
Satoshi crossed his arms. "Are you two really so immature? Fighting and crying over some stupid necklace?"
"H-huh?" they chorused. Satoshi came closer.
"Are you going to let some broken toy ruin your friendship? Do you really mean that little to each other?" He leaned down a little to look the girl in her eye. "Trust me, kid. If you walk away from your friend now and you never make up, you're going to regret it."
Chibi-Natsume and Blondie were silent for a moment. Then, almost shyly, the former looked over to her still-weeping friend. "I'm sorry I got so mad..."
He shook his head. "I'm sorry I broke it, Midori-chan. Gikochinai, ne?" She laughed before hugging him fondly.
As they made up, Satoshi silently crept away.
{ You've helped me find the strength inside }
{ And the courage to make my dreams come true }
{ How will I find another friend like you? }
So close. He was so close to the end, so close to Indigo Plateau. Only another badge or two, a little bit more training, and he'd be ready.
But would Shigeru be there?
: : FLASHBACK : :
"Hayaku, kame! We're gonna be late again!"
Shigeru and Satoshi were eight, and racing off towards school. As usual, Shigeru was ahead and Satoshi stumbled along behind him, barely managing to keep up with the taller boy's easy loping.
"G... Geru-chan!" he gasped, collapsing to his knees. "I can't run any faster!"
He sat panting as his exasperated friend stopped to run back to him. Shigeru shook his head. "Iya, don't say that, baka! Have some faith in yourself, ne?" Despite the nagging urge to get to school, he grinned down at his best friend. "I have all my faith in you."
Satoshi was surprised, even though he knew he shouldn't be. Shigeru had always been much more mature than himself, even when they were four. He smiled shakily and nodded, struggling to stand up. "All right... but if I pass out, you're carrying me!"
The brunette nodded. "I always will."
: : END FLASHBACK : :
{ Two of a kind, that's what we are }
{ And it seems like we were always winning }
Satoshi, Kasumi and Takeshi were visiting Masara Town. They had been sipping tea and discussing future plans when Nanami had arrived to welcome them. Ten minutes later, she had been well-accepted with the strangers to the town, and was seated comfortably with them as she listened to tales of their heroic deeds.
She beamed and turned to the quieter-than-usual Satoshi. "It's great hearing about how you and your friends get along. I'll never forget all the trouble you and Shigeru got yourselves into as kids," she laughed, not noticing the sudden darkening of his eyes. It didn't go unnoticed by the gym leaders, however.
Kasumi shook her head. "Nanami-san, please don't mention Shigeru. He's upsetting to hear about," she murmured softly as she watched her raven-haired friend being plagued by his inner demons. Nanami nodded, understanding more clearly than the water-type trainer could.
"Aa. Gomen, Sato-cha-"
"Don't call me that."
{ But as our team is torn apart }
{ I wish we could go back to the beginning }
Satoshi's fists were still clenched as he watched Shigeru and his fangirls drive away, the cruel peal of laughter ringing in his ears. Why did everything have to change between them?
Kasumi walked over and put a hand on his shoulder. "Hey, Satoshi, relax. They're idiots, so don't pay any attention to the stuff they say! It doesn't mean anything!"
Satoshi shook his head before looking up at her and giving her a shaky grin. "Hey, yeah, you're right. I should just forget about him, ne? It's not as if he's ever going to be my friend or anything..."
The girl nodded encouragingly. "Exactly! Screw him; the world would be a better place without his kind of selfish trash!"
She was too busy trying to cheer Satoshi up to notice his visible wince at her words. But Takeshi noticed, and Takeshi worried for him. He knew that there was something deeper than just a friendly rivalry between the raven-haired trainer and the brunette, but didn't know what.
"So okay... um... Kasumi? Kasumi... Kasumi, you can stop now," Satoshi repeated. The fiery girl didn't even hear him as she continued to chew out Shigeru, so Satoshi sighed and simply walked off. Takeshi watched him leave worriedly, but Kasumi kept right on ranting to Pikachu.
He walked just far enough to hide behind some trees and shut out Kasumi's droning. He knew she meant well, but... well, she was going about it completely in the wrong way. He sank down to the ground below him and didn't notice Takeshi approach until they were sitting next to each other.
{ The time has come }
{ It's for the best, I know it }
"Satoshi-kun, daijoubu?"
Satoshi gave him a wide grin. "Of course! Why wouldn't I be?"
Takeshi gave him The Look. "You may be able to deceive Kasumi, but the act doesn't last long. I grew up with a lot of little siblings to take care of, so I can tell you've been hiding something for a long time." Satoshi's grin faltered. "Is it about Shigeru?" The grin faded completely.
"Gomen ne, Takeshi-san... but I'd rather not talk about it."
"Were you two friends?"
Satoshi's head jerked up and he stared at his older companion with alarm. "Wh-where did you get that idea?!"
Takeshi shrugged. "You look like you're caught between anger and pain when Kasumi insults him, but the anger seems more indirectly aimed at her. You were friends, weren't you?" Satoshi hesitated before nodding miserably. "How close were you?"
"He... he was my best friend. He had been for so long, my first real friend..." his voice trailed off.
"What happened?"
Satoshi shrugged. "I don't know. He... I guess... he just decided I wasn't worth his time. I mean, he's... he's always acted so much older than me. Did you know that he's really smart? Nobody really gave him half a glance because he was so quiet all the time. Quiet and conservative, and noticed everything. He almost skipped a grade, but..."
The rock trainer listened with interest. "But what?" The younger teen sighed.
"But he didn't want to leave me. He said he'd rather do some independent study than leave me... always said he never wanted to hurt me..."
Takeshi studied Satoshi for a few moments. The latter shifted uncomfortably after a while and was about to speak up when his mentor interrupted. "You like him as more than a friend, don't you?"
Satoshi yelped and leapt to his feet. "Wh-what?!?! What... what do you mean?" he choked.
"You know perfectly well what I mean. Surely you knew... I mean, you've never been interested in any girls, and you're always more comfortable hugging guys and stuff." Takeshi shrugged. "It seemed pretty obvious to me anyway."
Satoshi leaned against the trunk of the tree, looking down at nothing as he pondered the words. Slowly, he fell to the ground, face closing up. "I... huh. That's true, I guess... but I mean... I'm not.... am I? I..." He was quiet for a moment, and the earlier question hung in the air. A couple of minutes later, he nodded slowly. "Yeah, I guess... I do." He looked up at Takeshi, trembling slightly. "But that makes it hurt more."
He silently welcomed the hug.
{ Who could have guessed that you and I }
{ Somehow, some way }
{ We'd have to say good-bye }
In another part of the woods, Shigeru climbed out of the car and, after managing to ditch his cheerleaders, climbed up the branches of a tree. He sat in the cradle of leaves and branches, taking deep breaths.
"Gomen ne, Sato-chan," he murmured to himself. "I promised never to hurt you... but if I had stayed with you... I would have hurt you more." He slowly rubbed his pendant- it had been the first birthday present he had ever received from someone outside of his family, and it had been from Satoshi. A permanent fixture around his neck, its presence both soothed him and broke his heart all over again. "I would have contaminated you... and you don't deserve that."
He sighed as he recalled the angry flames that danced in Satoshi's eyes whenever they glared at each other. With every scathing mockery, Shigeru bit his tongue. For each degrading statement he left behind, he wanted to burn the hand that wrote them. And every time he thought of the best friend he had abandoned- which was almost every second of the day- he wanted to run and run until he couldn't run anymore, and collapse where he knew that Satoshi would hold him again, and return the hug and never let go. He wanted more than Satoshi could ever give.
Shigeru pulled a thin blanket out of the bag he had brought with him from the car and wrapped it around himself. It wasn't that he was cold... but the blanket was another thing he was never without, although it never made a public appearance. It had been a project of his and Satoshi's, back when Hanako was determined to teach her little boy the finer crafts of home. Despite their constant jokes that Hanako was pretending that they were little girls with all the cooking and sewing, both of them had been ecstatic when they finished the quilt.
It wasn't thick, but it had sixty-four squares on it. The squares alternated colors of blue and green- their favorite colours. The top row said "SHIGERU" with a crescent moon before the name, and when the quilt was flipped over, it said "SATOSHI" with a star in the same place. The 48 leftover squares each had a different word that described them, and a symbol to go with it. It had taken all of their free time for two months to finish, but the end result was well worth it. Initially, Satoshi had kept it so that he and his mother could hang it on a wall, but on the following Christmas, he had given it to Shigeru.
Shigeru let out the breath he hadn't noticed he was holding in as he caressed the soft fabric. It and the necklace were the only things that reminded him of his best friend that he had allowed himself to keep. He pulled up the corner that had Satoshi's star. Bringing it to his lips, he kissed it gently and held it there, breathing in the scent and, with it, the memories. "I'm sorry, Sato-chan...
"I love you."
{ Somehow today, we'd have to say good-bye }
Default Note:
I thrive on reviews. People yakking at me motivates me. You're my adrenaline, you're my inspiration. Please leave me a review! The public is who we write for!
Non-default:
The quilt in the final scene is available for viewing (as an oekaki image) at =+= c o n t a g i o u n i s m =+=! The little black scribblies are the descriptive words, if you couldn't tell.
How ironic... when I began writing the first flashback, Misty's little American love song to Ash began playing. o.o; *sings* I wanna tell you what I'm feelin', but I don't know how to start; I wanna tell you, but now I'm afraid that you might break my heart..." Teehee. Satoshi should be singing this to Shigeru. Really, the whole bit about "I look at you; you look away~ee~ay" doesn't fit Satoshi and Kasumi's sibling-like, platonic relationship.