'Kay...this is my first Glee fic. One-shot, cuz I honestly have no brain capacity at the moment to plot out an entire narrative.
This takes place in Prom Queen, after Finn confronts Rachel about Jesse's return. To tell you the truth, I didn't feel wholly satisfied with the episode. I WANTED MORE ST BERRY. Also, I really really wanted to see what happened between Finn and Jesse at prom.
BUT! I'm sure it will get better in the next couple of episodes. Anyway, hope you enjoy this all-nighter one-shot :p
She was glad to get away from Finn, away from that horrid conversation. In the beginning, she expected as much when he confronted her about Jesse being back…
But for him to bring up Quinn like that right after she explained how much it hurt to see them together, it was unbearable. Even if he was concerned about Jesse coming back into Rachel's life, he didn't mind stinging her with his words about his rekindled relationship with the head cheerleader, which has bothered her since this year's regionals.
'I can't,' she told herself. 'I can't think about this. Just focus on your career, Rachel. You don't need a guy.'
"Rachel!"
It was that same voice, the same person who inexplicably hurt her feelings just moments ago. She wanted to keep walking, ignoring him and hopefully get far enough away that he'd give up for now.
But he didn't. Finn's footsteps echoed through the halls as he sped up to grab Rachel's elbow. Unable to fight him off, she just closed her eyes as he spun her around to face him. Rachel bit her lower lip to keep remain as patient as possible, but it was quickly dwindling away.
"What now, Finn?" she asked with disbelief. What else could he say to make her have any hope for them, to help her believe he still had feelings for her?
He exhaled sharply. "It's just not right! He EGGED you, Rachel. In the parking lot, right outside!" he said as he motioned to the direction of the parking lot. "And the next thing after that is you accept him as your date to prom? Don't you see anything wrong with that? Can't you get it right?"
At that, Rachel's painful expression melted into a glare of astonishment. "Get it right." Although her song was a hit at regionals, the feelings behind the song were never alleviated. Just what exactly was she doing wrong? Ever since their break-up, Rachel's been trying to deal and make the best of things. She had to sit through glee rehearsals day after day just to watch Finn and Quinn go on with their happily ever after. What more could she do other than endure it? Wasn't that what she's been doing since New Year's came around?
She remembered the time when Quinn slammed those words at her in the auditorium. Rachel had just explained how time would just repeat itself, that she and Finn would inevitably be back together…or at least that was what she believed.
And then pieces began linking in her head. Rachel had already been trying to get it right. The one that wasn't getting it right here…was Finn.
"No," she whispered as her eyes searched around, staring past the void space when realization struck her. "…You should."
"What?" she heard Finn ask.
She looked up at the giant, and her eyebrows slowly furrowed in with chagrin. Her head began shaking, and a storm brewed violently in her heart. Tears began welling – a mix of disappointment and rage.
"You get it right, Finn," she growled through her clenched teeth. "Honestly…Quinn? Don't you remember your troubling history with her? That "little" incident of her getting pregnant with Noah? If you ask me, getting pregnant behind your back is far worse than what I'm doing, if what I'm doing is even wrong to begin with! And she even lied to you for months. MONTHS!"
By then, Rachel was already barking at his face, and he had to futilely lean back to try and avoid her fury. She couldn't stand the hypocrisy in his words; it was enough that he chose to remain ignorant of Quinn's infidelity, but Rachel definitely wasn't going to sit back and take his chiding.
Finn just remained there, appalled. He didn't know what to say as he tried to process Rachel's words. She finally straightened back and huffed.
"Have fun preparing for prom, Finn," she said in a calm acidic voice. "I'm sure I will…with Jesse." With that, she turned on her heel and stormed down the halls and sped through the quad...holding the tears in until moments before bursting into the auditorium, where she endlessly choked on them.
Jesse checked his watch again and sighed. Rachel was usually punctual in her appointments; she wouldn't stand him up when they had to find him a matching outfit for her dress. When he had asked to look at the dress to get an idea of what to wear, she denied, not wanting to "ruin the surprise".
He couldn't help but smile at how calm Rachel was about his return. One of his expectations included a swift knee to his jewels, but somehow everything felt so smooth and nostalgic when he heard her sing "Rolling in the Deep" earlier. To tell the truth, he didn't want to get his hopes up at all – he just wanted to get a shot at explaining to Rachel and begging for forgiveness.
"That fourth National title was worthless," he muttered to himself. "…And now I'm at the bottom."
He leaned against the rail to peer down into the quad. Being in a high school brought good memories – mingling cliques, students eating the "healthy" school lunches, athletes shooting hoops on the mobile hoop, girls storming across the campus in tears…
His heart skipped a beat the moment he recognized the lone girl taking quick strides across the quad. Her face was red and streaming; it wasn't hard to see her condition from his standpoint.
"Rachel."
Jesse bolted to the nearest stairway, doing his best to maneuver past all the McKinley High students. Their faces blurred, and all the commotion around him deafened in his ears. All he could think about was catching up to her in time to console her, to comfort her to stop the tears.
So that she wouldn't cry like to what he did last year.
Descending the staircase to the quad wasn't easy. Everyone was heading upward, and he kept slamming into the surrounding fence with every turn. None of the awkward stares or whispers mattered to him. This can't be happening…not when he just came back to make amends.
She buried her face in her hands, trying to keep the tears from spilling everywhere. Every time she let out a sob, it got caught in her throat, choking her.
Just how did Finn and Quinn get back together, after all that happened between them last year? It made no sense. What's more, Quinn just continued to cheat with her boyfriends: she first cheated on Finn with Puck, and now she cheated on Sam with Finn. And all Rachel did was let Jesse back into her life.
'I'm not doing anything wrong…am I?'
It hurt to think about it, and she leaned forward to rest her forehead on her knees while wrapping her hands around the back of her neck. She let out a sigh to ease her lungs and throat.
Should she have just kicked Jesse out of the school the moment he sang the first verse? Was it right for her to trust him now? He couldn't really gain anything in his current state: he's no longer in college, practically living off of his parents' money… It looked like a good leap of faith to open up to him again.
But the way things are now…she can't handle any more heartbreak.
Just then, a soft melodious intro filled the auditorium. Her head snapped up and scoured the stage to find someone on the piano, looking down at the keys as he played.
"There's nothing I could say to you,
Nothing I could ever do to make you see
What you mean to me
All the pain, the tears I cried
Still you never said goodbye and now I know
How far you'd go"
Rachel initially watched him with confusion. He must have been aware that she was present, but now he's up on the stage playing on the grand piano.
"I know I let you down
But it's not like that now
This time I'll never let you go"
The music and his voice had such a relaxing effect, like a soft blanket floating down to wrap around her. The strong nostalgia came rushing back, and in her head, Rachel could see the two of them back in the music store, sitting at the piano singing Lionel Richie's "Hello".
But then, the words he sang began floating in her mind. She could hear the honesty and sincerity in his voice by the way he sang so softly, drawing her in more.
"I will be all that you want
And gather myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart
All my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything okay."
As soon as the last tears formed in her eyes, Rachel stood to slowly walk down the aisle, heading toward the stage where Jesse continued to play. His voice was too enchanting at that moment. Now that she knew him well, she also knew how to look out for lies and deceit in his voice and actions…
But there wasn't a trace of them in the man before her.
"I thought that I had everything,
I didn't know what life could bring
But now I see, honestly"
She sat next to him on the piano bench and watched him play. Checking to make sure her sobs didn't ruin her throat too much, Rachel jumped in with the harmonizing vocals – softly at first, but then perfectly blending with his own.
"You're the one thing I got right
The only one I let inside
Now I can breathe, cause you're here with me"
He looked toward her at his side, carefully looking into her eyes as she sang along. There were bare traces of the pain she was just combating, but he could see the scars left by Finn healing.
"And if I let you down
I'll turn it all around
Cause I would never let you go
I will be all that you want
And gather myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart
And all my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything okay"
Her voice had already crescendo, preparing for the ending bridge, and the feeling emanating from her was similar to the feeling back at the music store. Rachel's voice was so beautiful, even better than how he remembered last year. And Jesse knew one thing for certain: if she was able to sing this well right now, I meant that she was getting into a better mood than the funk she was already in.
She was trusting him.
He took the first part of the final bridge by himself, and Rachel watched to marvel at his vocal feats.
"Cause without you, I can't breathe
I'm not gonna ever, ever let you leave
You're all I got, you're all I want
Oh~"
As Rachel took the last of the bridge, he watched a smile surface upon her face as he continued playing through her part.
"And without you, I don't know what I'd do
I can never, ever live a day without you
Here with me, do you see,
You're all I need"
At that moment, she felt the catharsis she longed for in months. There was someone there to confide into, to allow her to be a child and release everything she had pent up inside. Only this time, she released all of it through her voice rather than just small crying fits that just made things worse.
She looked over at Jesse, who was still reeling from her catharsis. In his eyes, it was like seeing Rachel's true inner self for the first time. Back when they were dating, he was still blinded by his true mission to see her struggles and understand exactly what she was going through. To see her able to release the pain and worry inside made his feeling for her grow even more.
Slowly but carefully, he rested his forehead against hers, inhaling her scent. It took all he had to keep him from crushing their lips together, but Jesse made sure to keep his calm. In matter of seconds, their breaths became staggered, and they were almost thrown back into the old days.
But what if everything happened all over again? One thing could lead to another, and eventually, they could find themselves going through the same heartbreak all over again.
'No,' Jesse thought to himself. 'I won't force that upon her.'
With much restraint, he simply kissed her forehead, lingering for a few seconds before leaning back. They looked at each other with craving eyes, but the both of them knew that it was just too soon.
"I can't wait to see you in your dress," he finally whispered…and Rachel finally cracked a small smile.
"Not so fast, hotshot. We still gotta find something for you." She got up from the bench first and, surprisingly, took his hand into hers to pull him up. Jesse freely allowed her to do so with joy already filling him up that Rachel was back to her old self.
Only…she wasn't her old self. She was a brand new person – stronger, more respectable…
The type of person he always wished for her to turn into so that she could be fit to be by his side.
The song used was Leona Lewis' "I Will Be". Absolutely beautiful; make sure you listen to it.
Reviews are nicely appreciated :)