Title: Well, Now I'm Just Insulted

Author: CrisisChild

Summary: Odd little shorts based on the character specific encounter lines spoken in Dissidia. Lots of 'taken out of context' crack. 'Because he often got a lot of complaint from the other Warriors of Cosmos about it and thought about having a reduction surgery for the light that shone from his very being.'

Rated: T

Disclaimer: I do not own anything that has to do with Dissidia. At all. Except the disk. And the packaging that came with it. That's it.

Author's Note: Because this begged to be done eventually. And because I enjoy mocking people I hold dear. This also includes the men and women of Dissidia. 144 prompts. All actual dialogue from Dissidia Final Fantasy.

"I hate guys like you the most."

The Warrior of Light had only come up against the Harlequin a few times before and every single time, Kefka just got more annoying. Was it any wonder that nearly everyone on Chaos' side barely tolerated his presence? Still, guys like him? What did he mean by that? Was it the shine? Because he often got a lot of complaint from the other Warriors of Cosmos about it and thought about having a reduction surgery for the light that shone from his very being. His inner light was unbearably bright and his armour – polished to a shine and without even a hint of a scratch despite what must have been over a million battles thus far – really didn't help matters. More than once he blinded his allies in battle, causing them to trip on their own feet and impaling themselves on their own weapons (or shooting themselves in the face, depending on their armament of choice).

The Warrior of Light would hate himself, too, if he died because he didn't have the sense to tone it down.

Thinking of things like that, he felt a little depressed. And a little mad. Kefka never knew what hit him;as far as the Warrior of Light knew he never did like clowns.