Title: Closed Doors
Author: Smartkitty314
Summary: If you asked why Sherlock Holmes didn't let anyone into his heart…
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I don't own anything and I don't intend to make any profit on it except for priceless constructive criticism.


If you asked Sherlock Holmes why he didn't let anyone into his heart, and if he for some incomprehensible reason actually answered, he would probably say something like relationships required time, energy, and commitment, and after the initial spark faded they were boring, and frankly, he didn't have the time to devote to anything so inane.

If you asked Mycroft why Sherlock Holmes didn't let anyone into his heart, he would give you a long explanation filled with big, scientific words that you wouldn't understand written in careful penmanship in his little brown notebook, copied down from various psychoanalysts that Mummy had finally agreed to send him to, but it basically boiled down to one point: he was lonely and isolated as a child, he was expected to care for himself early on, he became an adult before he reached double digits, he learned that being vulnerable with people only meant it was easier for them to hurt you.

Frankly, Mycroft would tell you, Sherlock got it right. Relationships made it so much easier for others to manipulate you. For someone as emotionally unstable as Sherlock, such a relationship could easily make him happier, but the instant it ended, his brother would be a wreck, and, of course, Mummy would expect him to clean up the pieces. Relationships end in one of two ways: either one person leaves, breaking both hearts, or one person dies, breaking the remaining one's heart.

Actually, Mycroft probably isn't the best person to ask, because he has even more relationship problems than Sherlock does.

Mrs. Hudson would tell you what a sweet boy Sherlock was, and that he did love people, only in his own special way. He might make quite a ruckus, or destroy her walls, but he always paid the rent, plus extra (usually when he was bored and didn't bother to count, but he always denied it and told her to keep the extra). There was that time, too, when he was especially bored, he came up with a more efficient herbal soother. Sure, she had asked John and her own doctor to examine it, make sure it was, well, only herbs, but ever since then her hip hadn't hurt quite as much. He didn't even expect her to be his housekeeper, and if she does pick tidy up his kitchen a bit, it's only because she doesn't like the mess, not because he expects her to or anything. Besides, it's normal for landladies to make their tenants tea, and biscuits, and bring them dinner, and help out with the laundry…

Sally Donovan would say it's because he's a freak, and doesn't have emotions. Anderson would use it as an opportunity to insult Sherlock, and probably mix up psychopath, sociopath, and Anti Social Personality Disorder. Again.

DI Lestrade would give the rather truthful answer that he doesn't really know Sherlock well enough to answer that question, but Sherlock certainly isn't heartless. If he had to guess, he'd say that Sherlock was hurt as a child or something, or perhaps with Sherlock's massive intellect he's so used to being amazing and brilliant at everything that he feels awkward not being fully fluent in the language of emotions. Sherlock hates feeling…not in control, so he refuses to play the whole emotions game. Even though he's like a child in many ways, though, that doesn't mean that Lestrade has anything less than the highest regard for Sherlock abilities. Lestrade has grown rather…fond of Sherlock eccentricities over the years. When you ignore the jibes at your intelligence every two minutes, the consulting detective is an absolutely fascinating man to work with. Lestrade didn't know what he was to Sherlock—a surrogate uncle-like figure, a babysitter? He's not quite sure what Sherlock is to him either. He's more than an arrogant genius invited to crime scenes, but would he call Sherlock a friend?

Lestrade would tell you that Sherlock defies all categorization, and nothing is that simple with him. Just…go with the flow, and hope you keep up with him. Don't worry about trying to figure out the complex mind or emotion of the genius.

If you asked John Watson why Sherlock Holmes didn't let anyone into his heart, John would just give you a long, sad look, and ask you if you really understood Sherlock Holmes at all. The underlying sentiment, that he would not speak aloud, would be the closest of all to the truth of the abovementioned answers:

but Sherlock Holmes does let people into his heart.


a/n: If this was from the point of view of various points of view, the companion piece, Open Doors, is from Sherlock's point of view (still written in third person). This was just sort of a drabble; what can I say? I was in the mood. It's not really my best work, but it's good enough to post, so I figured why not. Review if you care you.

Because the crossover section doesn't seem to get much attention, I'm using this opportunity to shamelessly advertise a story that I'm writing called "Time and Space for Geniuses," a Sherlock/Doctor Who crossover, which is basically DW Season 5 re-written with various Sherlock character, mainly Sherlock in the place of Amelia Jessica Pond. I would much appreciate if you checked that story out.