Hey guys! So, it seems like I've been on such an intense Hevans (Kum, Skurt, Kam, whichever you prefer) kick anymore, and naturally with Rumours being SO CLOSE TO AIRING, I had to write another fic.
…even though it has nothing to do with Rumours, so I'm not quite sure why I felt the need to mention it – but yeah. The Hevans Canoe is paddling faster than ever now ;-) It's only a matter of time now!
Anyways…I hope you guys like it!
R&R and, please, no flames!
xox
degrassichick
This is Now
There was nothing more awkward than being in the same room as your ex-boyfriend...well, unless your current boyfriend was in the room as well. And right now, they were both there. Kurt had never felt more awkward in his entire seventeen and a half years of existence.
Blaine was in the front row of Mr. Schue's room, sitting next to Mercedes; Sam was in the back row with Kurt, mindlessly playing with Kurt's fingertips like he often did. Kurt didn't think he even realized he was doing it - he just sat there, staring off into space with Kurt's hand in his. Not that Kurt was complaining, of course. Sam's touch never failed to make his toes curl from inside his ankle boots. Just as Broadway had always assured him, the mere touch of the fingertips was plenty sensual all on its own. Somehow, Sam Evans had tapped into Kurt's feelings and theory toward fingertips, and now he held his hand any and every chance he got, intertwining their fingers like vines and allowing them to dance and graze against one another.
"So, who's next? Santana, you ready?" Mr. Schue asked, looking up at the bombshell from where he was seated at a stool in the corner with Ms. Pillsbury.
Santana nodded and smoothed down her skirt before making her way to the front of the classroom. She nodded for Puck to come join her, and he and his guitar took the stool right next to her, strumming the opening bars of "Big Girls Don't Cry" before Santana started crooning her own rendition of the Fergie ballad flawlessly.
Kurt looked over at Sam and noticed that his green eyes were already on him. The blonde boy smiled before lifting their hands to his lips and pressing a quick kiss to the tips of Kurt's middle three fingers. Kurt's body was buzzing.
As Sam sat back into his seat and focused on Santana and Puck's performance, Kurt allowed his eyes to drift across the choir room before ultimately landing on Blaine, who was staring down at his lap uncomfortably. He felt a pang of guilt from inside of him.
He and Sam had been together since June, since a few weeks after Nationals in New York. While in New York, Kurt had found himself drawn to Sam like the opposite ends of a magnet finally coming together after too much time apart. It seemed like everywhere he'd been in New York, Sam had somehow been right by his side. After awhile, he just let the chips fall where they were destined to, and it resulted in him spending almost every waking hour scouring New York City with Sam Evans right there in time with him; their feet pounding against the pavement in a strange synchrony, their movements matching each other, their bodies always leaning in toward each other. He hadn't known how to explain it, but it had scared him - scared him to the point where he'd known that he wasn't being fair to Blaine. He'd ended things with Blaine the night they got back from New York, even though it had been one of the hardest things he'd ever had to do.
And now, here was Blaine, sitting in the front row of McKinley High School's glee club. He wasn't supposed to be there, but all of the teams that had been selected for regionals this year had to send their team captain to one of the opposing schools to give their best wishes - whether they meant them or not - and help to encourage team spirit and sportsmanship. Right now, Rachel was visiting Vocal Adrenaline, and some supposedly phenomenal sophomore student was visiting Dalton Academy. The Warblers had, naturally, selected Blaine as their captain and the school he'd been assigned to go visit had unfortunately been McKinley.
They'd kept their distance so far, but he kept seeing Blaine look over his shoulder at him and Sam in the opposite back corner of the room, and it made his stomach twist. He'd never meant to hurt him - he'd never expected to say goodbye to him. But he hadn't expected Sam, either. Sure, he'd crushed all over him at the beginning of junior year, but so much had happened in those months that he'd been away at McKinley that he'd been certain that when he got back to McKinley, there'd be nothing but platonic feelings shared between him and Samuel Evans.
Apparently, he'd been wrong.
Blaine met his eyes and Kurt gave him a sincere, closed-lip smile. Blaine looked away from him and Kurt's heart sank. Clearly witnessing the tension, Sam gave Kurt's hand a gentle squeeze, and when Kurt met his eyes he mouthed, "it's okay."
But it wasn't. The guilt was eating him up inside. These last few months of Kam - as the glee club had dubbed them after running through every possible name combination in the book - had been wonderful. He was dating one of the sweetest guys he'd ever met, a guy filled with this wonderful, beautiful innocence and sparkle in his eyes. He couldn't keep a straight face on for more than a few seconds and he always spoiled the punchline of a joke halfway through telling it. He spouted off movie quotes on the whim and he was the only one who'd ever been able to give Kurt an actual challenge when playing Scene It and Trivial Pursuit. He wouldn't take back these months with Sam for anything, and he couldn't wait to see what the future held for them...but the kicked puppy look on Blaine's face was killing him right now, and he didn't know what to do about it.
As Santana belted into the chorus, Blaine all of a sudden stood up from his chair and tore out of the classroom. Every pair of eyes in the room followed him, but Kurt's the only one who got up and physically did.
He found him sitting in one of the window cutouts, and when Blaine saw him nearing him, he shook his head. "It's fine, Kurt."
"No, Blaine, it's not," he sat next to him, turning his body toward his first boyfriend's and crossing his right leg over his left knee. "I'm so sorry."
Blaine shook his head and Kurt could swear that there were tears glossing over in his eyes. "I just never thought I'd actually have to see you...with him. See you guys together."
"I know," Kurt murmured, staring down at his black skinny jeans. This was all so awkward, he sort of wondered why he'd even followed Blaine out here. He had no idea what to say. "I never meant to hurt you, Blaine."
"I know you didn't, Kurt," Blaine nodded. "But that doesn't make any of thisany easier."
"Kurt?" a familiar voice broke out into hallway and Kurt's heart fell to his stomach - the only thoughts running through his head being the phrase, "NOT NOW!"over and over again. This would not end well...it couldn't.
Blaine caught sight of Sam and shot up from the window. "This is all your fault," he seethed, storming toward the blonde football player.
"Blaine!" Kurt cried out, jumping up after him.
But, it was too late. Before Sam could even open his mouth to come up with a response to Blaine's statement, Blaine's fist had flown into his face; socking him in the cheek and sending him staggering back a couple of steps.
"I knew he never should have come back here," Blaine's voice broke with a few shallow tears. "This never would have happened - you never would have happened and Kurt would still..." he paused, backing away from Sam and shaking his head, he looked between Sam and Kurt and raised his hands in the air. "It doesn't even matter," he declared bitterly, his voice anguished as he spun on his heel and stormed down the hallway. They heard the double doors open and slam shut a few moments later.
Kurt hurried toward Sam and stroked his hand across his cheek a few times, the red circle where Blaine's fist had landed already making its way onto his soft, otherwise clean face. "Are you okay?"
"Are you?" Sam redirected the question, giving Kurt a knowing look.
"I knew this was going to be awkward," Kurt shrugged. "I just...I knew I had to do something, you know?"
Sam nodded, smiling sadly - he looked younger than Kurt had ever seen him look at that moment, he looked like a little boy who'd just tried to conquer a giant. "It's in your nature to care, Kurt. It's one of the things I love about you."
Kurt could swear his heart had stopped beating for a moment. He had to catch his breath before he could start speaking. "Did you just say you...love me?"
Sam bit his lip and nodded. "Yeah, I think I did."
He cupped the boy's face with both hands before leaning in and pressing a gentle kiss against his lips. Sam's hands rested on Kurt's elbows and they stayed in that position for a few moments, swaying slowly from side to side. Kurt smiled against his lips when they broke apart, their foreheads still touching. "I love you, too," he murmured softly. He leaned back slightly and winced at the welt on Sam's cheek. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"I deserved it," Sam shrugged as if it were that simple. "If I lost you to someone else, I'd want to knock them on their ass, too."
Kurt smiled sadly before lacing his fingers through Sam's and guiding him back to the choir room. "Come on, let's get back to glee club."
Sam paused his boyfriend's actions, staying frozen where he stood. Kurt turned around and blinked at him, puzzled. "Sam?"
Sam released his hand from Kurt's and took a few steps backwards, following the path that Blaine had just taken moments before. "There's just something I need to do first, okay?"
Kurt's face fell and his stomach was filled with dread.
This was not going to be pretty.
Blaine saw Sam as soon as he was nearing his parked BMW and he let out a groan. "What now, Sam? You really need to gloat that badly? You got Kurt, you win, case closed."
"I'm not a bragger, actually," Sam reprimanded him. "It's not really my style. It seems like a dick move."
Blaine sighed. "Then what do you want?"
"Kurt's a really good guy," Sam explained, trying his best to keep his voice steady. "And he cares a lot about you, Blaine."
"What's your point?" No matter how much bait Sam was feeding him, the Warbler was not biting. Sam couldn't really blame him.
"He never meant to hurt you – he'd never want to hurt you. Even if he thinks he's not constantly beating himself up over how things ended with the two of you, he is. He hates how things ended."
"Then why did he decide to end them?" Blaine asked. Sam realized a moment later, when he opened his mouth to respond and Blaine beat him to the punch, that he had asked it rhetorically. "Oh, that's right, because of you."
"I love him," Sam replied in the only way he knew how.
"Have you told him?" Blaine asked, given the tone of his voice, Sam didn't think that Blaine thought he had.
"Yeah, actually," Sam replied, smiling at the thought of what had gone down between him and Kurt a few minutes before.
Blaine's face fell and he stared at Sam in a state of dumbfound. "You have?"
"You never told Kurt that?"
Judging from the silence he received from Blaine, he took it as a "no," which was very surprising to him. From what he'd always seen of Kurt and Blaine, they'd always seemed in love with each other – obnoxiously in love. Kurt had always stared at Blaine like he was a bounty that he'd never thought he'd actually catch. He'd never looked at Sam the way he'd looked at Blaine.
"He told me," Blaine responded uneasily. "I just…I never said it back, I guess. I don't know why. I probably should have." He looked up at Sam and frowned. "Not that I think it would have changed anything. New York still would have happened."
"Nothing happened in New York, Blaine," Sam rolled his eyes. "I don't go after taken people – I try not to, at least. I kept all of my feelings for Kurt to myself…hell, I'm lucky I even came out to the guy – the entire time I was telling him about it, I thought my entire body was going to self-destruct like the Terminator, I was shaking so bad. I figured he could tell exactly what I felt for him, just by me talking to him. But, it never went beyond that. He was my friend, and it developed into something more, and I'm sorry that the outcome of it all hurt you…but I can't make myself regret something that I don't regret, and I don't regret what happened between me and Kurt. I don't regret any of it." Blaine was silent, staring down at the asphalt of the parking lot. "He's the only person who makes me feel like me, and he doesn't call me a moron or an idiot when I don't read a word correctly or I can't figure out the answer to an easy question. He quotes movies with me and he knows more about Charlie Chaplin than I do – and that's not an easy feat, believe me. He's the best thing to have ever happened to me."
Blaine opened and closed his mouth a few times, like he was searching for the right words to say and none of them were coming out right in his head. "He seems different around you," he finally said after a few moments of silence. "More…I don't know…more like himself, I guess."
"That's exactly the way I love him," Sam smiled, shrugging his shoulders. "He's about as subtle as a Na'vi walking around Lima, Ohio with a Burger King crown on its head, he's loud and he can be a smartass at times – but I can't imagine him being any different. I wouldn't want him to be any different."
"He wasn't like that with me," Blaine stated sadly. "When he was with me, it always seemed like there was some barrier up, like he was scared to do something out of the box, like I wouldn't approve or something." He shook his head and it looked as if all of these puzzle pieces were fitting together in his head. "And at times, the real Kurt would come out but then he'd shove him right back in. But with you, it looks like he's always that way. He's never reserved or quiet, he seems really comfortable around you."
Sam figured he should take it as a compliment, even though Blaine's tone suggested otherwise. He smiled back at him, but didn't say anything.
"And Kurt's happy with you?" Blaine asked with a concerned tone, looking up at Sam pleadingly.
Sam nodded, smiling gently. "I like to think so, yeah."
"And he's okay and happy in general, right?"
Sam sighed, his bangs drooping down and sloping over his eye before he shook them out of the way. "He'd be happier if you'd go talk to him."
Blaine shook his head. "I know that I should be the bigger person and all, but I just…I just need time, you know?"
Sam nodded.
Blaine took a few steps back toward his vehicle, smiling a sad smile at Sam as if he had just surrendered. "Take care of him, Evans."
Sam could only smile back at him as he took a few steps back toward McKinley. "Three steps ahead of you, Anderson."
As Blaine opened up his car door, he turned back to look at him. "I don't regret punching you, though."
Sam bowed back at him with his hands clasped in front of him like a samurai. "Understood."
When he got back in the building, Kurt was waiting for him in the very window cutout where he and Blaine had been sitting. He stood up at once when he saw Sam in the hallway and hurried toward him. His words and questions of concern all toppled out at once, rushing together. "Are you okay? What happened? I don't see any more bruises on your face, so I'm assuming everything went okay. Is Blaine okay? What did he say? He didn't threaten a lawsuit for wrongful breakup or anything, did he? Do you think I should—?"
Sam put his words to a stop at an instant when he latched onto Kurt's hand and pulled it up to his lips, grazing his fingertips with a smattering of tiny kisses.
Just that simple action alone seemed to leave Kurt breathless, and he stared back at Sam with his cheeks flushed. "So, I take it everything's okay?"
Sam smirked, pressing a quick kiss to Kurt's lips before intertwining their fingers and using his free arm to wrap around Kurt's small waist as the pair made their way back down the hallway, toward glee club.
"Are you happy with me, Kurt?" he asked in a dazed voice, hoping he didn't sound too anxious or hopeful.
Kurt stopped in the middle of the hallway and stared back up at his boyfriend like he'd just confessed to being a closeted fan of telenovelas. "What kind of question is that, Sam?" he asked in surprise, he had a small smile on his face – but it seemed to be more out of general concern and worry than anything else. "Of course I'm happy with you – ridiculously happy. Hallmark card happy."
Sam smiled gently and pressed a kiss to Kurt's temple as they made their way back into Mr. Schue's classroom just as Artie was finishing up a rap to Ice, Ice Baby with Mike Chang as his backup dancer.
"Then everything's more than okay."
I hope you liked it!
xox
degrassichick