Adventures in Kingdom Hearts
What happens when my friends and I get trapped in the world of Kingdom Hearts? Mayhem, character molestation, plot destruction, and pretty much all hell breaking loose.
Disclaimer: Strong language because my friends swear like sailors and are perverted. I dedicate this story to them and their random craziness.
Me: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or any Disney characters.
Ch.1- Cura and Cookies
"Cura, Cura!"
"Would you shut up," Zack yelled as he viciously pressed the buttons on the controller that made Sora attack and what-not.
"You're supposed to throw the barrels at him," Jessica read aloud from the walk through she'd found on the internet.
"You don't get cookies until you beat him," Lauren threatened and winced when Zack was hit by Hercules again. Damn, that stupid spinning blade attack!
"Gah, bitch stop spinning," Zack cursed as he made Sora dodge roll away.
"Donald's down." They all gave a frustrated sigh. They'd been playing for hours. Each time they would get to Hercules he would beat them, making re-enter the tournament and fight all the way back to him.
"Oh, oh, just a few more hits," Jessica cheered...until Hercules jumped in the air and killed Sora with the landing.
"Ah, you Bitch!" Zack yelled at the TV screen, throwing the controller away in frustration.
They re-entered the tournament and took turns passing the controller between the three of them. At round five Jessica nearly glomped the screen when Cloud appeared. "Cloud, I want to rape him," she declared. Zack and Lauren rolled their eyes. "Well your about to watch him get his ass kicked," Zack said as he took the control from Lauren. "You can have Cloud," Zack continued, "cause I get Roxas and Axel."
"Over my dead body," Lauren snorted. She grabbed Jessica's orange guard flag. "I'll fight you for them!"
"You get Sora," Zack stated. "And you do not want to get in the way of me and my rape victims."
"Zack pay attention he's flying around the arena." Zack turned back to the game in time to dodge roll away from Cloud's attacks. After Cloud stopped flying all over the place Zack finished him with Fira.
"Oh, bye Cloud. God I wish Kingdom Hearts was real," Jessica sighed and Lauren and Zack agreed. Yes, Jessica would probably rape Cloud, Zack would lock Roxas and Axel in a room, and Lauren would stay glomped onto Sora while trying to steal Roxas and Axel from Zack's room.
Zack fought the rest of the Heartless battles till, finally, he got back to Hercules. You're going down motherfucker,"Zack practically growled. Lauren and Jessica scooted away from the evil glint in Zack's eyes. The fight against Hercules went a little like this, Dodge Roll, Lift Barrel, Throw Barrel, Guard, Attack, Heal, Repeat. When Zack finally landed the final blow all three cheered. They watched the victory seen and saved the game.
"Cookie," Zack demand hand out expectantly. Lauren stuck her tongue out childishly, a behavior she'd learned from Jessica, but handed him the plate of chocolate chip cookies none the less.
As they all enjoyed the cookies they didn't notice as the TV screen turned from the lobby of the coliseum to a dark swirling mist. All three of them yawned before blacking out with the cookies falling to the ground.
J: Oh no! THE COOKIES!
Z: SAVE THE COOKIES!
Me: ...Well any way I hope you enjoyed! Please Review & thanx for reading!