"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog." — Mark Twain

Chapter 2: The Dog in the Fight

When the disheveled Danny Williams was brought out in handcuffs, both Mickey Kaina and the bartender protested.

"He didn't start the fight!" Paul Beagle said, pressing a tissue against a cut on his cheek. "He was dancing with a girl and this big Hawaiian dude threw him across the room."

"I'm sorry, sir, but he has a gun and no ID. We have to take him in."

"But he's a cop!" Mickey protested.

"How long have you known him?" the officer asked. He was perfectly willing to let Danny go if he was properly identified.

"Well, we just met tonight," Mickey admitted. "But we were introduced …"

Danny shook his head sharply, silencing Mickey. There was no sense besmirching Kono's rookie record.

"Leave our friend out of it, Mickey. But speaking of …"

"She and the girls took Naneki to the hospital. Nan was bleeding." He didn't mean bleeding from a cut.

The men looked bleak. If the poor girl lost that child she'd been so happy about …

The officer nudged Danny toward the patrol car.

"Can I do anything to help, Danny?"

"I lost my ID during the fight. See if you can find it?" the detective pleaded.

"OK. Come on, Paul. I'll help you clean up once the cops are done."

"Baker, anyone here who knows the guys in Five-0?" Officer Fujita asked when he brought Danny into the station, which was almost as quiet as the empty Sundog.

"Since there's no one here but me, that would be 'no,'" the desk sergeant answered. "Who's this?" he asked, regarding the battered but cooperative suspect.

"Five-0, or so he says."

"I can't help you," Baker said apologetically. "Before I deployed, there was no such thing as Five-0 and this is my first day back. It's been exceptionally busy, even for a Friday night. Everyone's out." He ticked off items on his fingers. "There was your bar brawl, a riot at a rock concert, two multi-car accidents on the highway and a man holding his wife at knife point, apparently because she burned the pot roast tonight."

"No detectives?" Danny asked. He was getting the sinking feeling he was going to have to call Steve for help with a large side order of mockery.

"See above," the sergeant answered. "Plus a big drug bust with the Feds and a stakeout that looks like it will be an all-nighter."

Danny tried one more suggestion. "Look, I am Detective Danny Williams," he said patiently. "If you could check the personnel files …"

"The computer's down."

"Again?" More than anything else, Danny's outrage convinced the two officers that he was who he said he was, so they decided to detain him without booking him.

"The techs are working on it now. That's why it's down. Maybe it won't keep going down when they're done."

"Computers, can't live with them, etc. etc. etc." Danny said.

"After two tours in Iraq, I always like to have a low tech backup, just in case," Baker said. "So I have a clipboard with important phone numbers on it." He flipped to the second page. "Including one Steve McGarrett who is the head of Five-0, according to this."

Danny closed his eyes in pain that had nothing to do with present bruises and everything to do with future wisecracks.

"Fine. Call my boss," he said in resignation. "Subject me to public humiliation and ridicule. It's been that kind of night."

"What started the fight?" Fujita asked, as Baker began to dial.

"I kissed the wrong girl," Danny answered.

"Was it worth it?" Fujita uncuffed him, put him in a holding cell and went to get a cold pack out of the first aid kit.

Danny grinned. "Yeah."

"Officer, you have a desperado for me to identify?" Steve McGarrett said breezily, as he entered the squad room. He held his open ID for Fujita to inspect.

Danny closed his eyes in a plea for strength. He lay on the bunk in the cell holding a cold pack to his bruised face. The eye in the unbruised side regarded Steve unfavorably as the Five-0 commander approached.

"What do we have here? The Jersey Devil? The Trenton Terror? The Hoboken Hobgoblin?"

"Should I wait until you've run out of New Jersey cities?" Danny asked.

"It's your heritage of violence," Steve said sadly. "The peaceful people of Honolulu have no defense against a man from the mean streets of New Jersey."

"Stop. Just stop," Danny said. "I was out tonight minding my own business and this is what I got from the playful natives."

Favoring his left arm, Danny sat up and turned his head to face his partner. Steve had been expecting a black eye, not bruises covering most of the left side of Danny's face. Steve winced in sympathy.

"You look like one of those football fans who paints half his face in the team colors, but no team has 'bruise' for a color," Steve said.

"Officer, isn't there a law against torture by bad comedy?" Danny demanded.

"I don't know, but I can check the statutes, detective," the officer offered as he got the keys to release Danny.

Danny groaned and put the cold pack back on his face. "Another comedian."

"Are you all right, partner?" Steve asked in genuine concern.

"Do I look all right?" All the outrage that Danny had restrained as a prisoner came flowing out. "I got beat up and then I got arrested for getting beat up!"

"Not arrested," the officer protested. "I didn't book you."

Steve opened his mouth.

"Don't," Danny warned.

"What happened?" Steve asked instead.

"He kissed a Hawaiian girl and a haole-hater objected," Fujita said.

"Don't you know better than to pick up strange women in bars?" Steve chided.

"It wasn't Lily's fault. Anyway, we were properly introduced."

"Really? Who by?" Steve asked curiously. He figured he knew almost everyone Danny did.

"I'll take the Fifth," Danny answered as he reclaimed his weapon from Fujita.

"It's OK, Danny. I'm a big girl. I'm not ashamed to introduce you to my friends," Kono Kalakaua said.

When Kono and Lily entered HPD headquarters, the officer saw Catherine Rollins waiting in the lobby — which meant Steve was already there, probably giving Danny a hard time.

"Damn!"

"Nice to see you again, too, Officer Kalakaua," Catherine said in amusement.

"Sorry. Lt. Catherine Rollins, this is Lily Kiliona. Catherine is my boss' … um … friend," Kono said. "Was Steve really mad?" she asked Catherine.

"A little, but he was almost as amused as he was annoyed."

"That's almost worse. I'm going to kill Puhi for this," Kono muttered, angry that her plans to cheer Danny up had wiped out like a novice surfer on the Pipeline.

"Not if my brothers get to him first," Lily answered.

Catherine tilted her head. "I'm not sure, but if I follow you, won't Danny want first shot at the guy who sucker-punched him?" The Navy lieutenant knew a lot about soothing egos in a man's world.

Kono and Lily exchanged looks.

"True," Lily accepted. "Danny gets first dibs."

"Then me," Kono insisted.

Lily held up her hands in surrender. "OK."

"I'd better get in there," Kono said. She stiffened her spine. "Wait here, Lily. Are you sure you want to file a police report?"

"I'm not afraid of the big bully," Lily answered.

"OK, I'll be right back." Kono showed her ID and entered the squad room area.

"You gave up awfully easy," Catherine commented.

"It occurred to me that we're talking about assault and battery, not murder."

"So?"

"So, after Danny and Kono arrest the SOB, he'll probably make bail. Then my brothers can beat him up."

"Very practical. So, are you Danny's 'um' friend,'" Catherine teased Lily.

She smiled weakly. "It's too soon for 'um.' We only met …" Lily checked her watch. "About five hours ago. But I liked him a lot."

She rubbed her forehead, where a bruise was developing. It hurt more than the one that was turning her right cheek purple.

"I don't suppose he'll want to 'um' when he got pounded just for kissing me," she said sadly.

"You don't need to protect me," Kono told Danny. "Here, I brought you your ID."

Danny took the badge and wallet gladly.

"Lily picked them up to keep them safe. I didn't realize she had them until we were leaving the hospital. I knew HPD would take you in if you had a gun and no ID, so we came right over."

"Hospital? Is Nan OK?" Danny asked in quick concern. "The baby…?"

"The baby's OK. The bleeding stopped on its own. The scare made Nan go into premature labor, but they gave her a shot at the hospital and the pains stopped. They're keeping her overnight, but they think she'll be OK. But that's why it took so long."

"How's Lily?"

"She's got bruises matching yours," Kono said wryly. She studied her friend's bruised face. "Aw, Danny, I'm sorry. I should have backed you up!" the rookie officer said in distress.

"Hey! Who's the senior officer, me or you? Me, right? Did you follow my instructions and get the civilians to safety? Including one who needed medical attention?"

Kono nodded.

"Then you did the right thing," Danny assured his friend. "I don't blame you for this," he said, gesturing at his bruises. "I blame that jerk who tossed me around the bar like a basketball. I wish I knew who he was, so I could explain to him, on a one-to-one basis, that haole bashing is against the law."

"You didn't do so well the last time you 'debated' with him," Steve reminded him.

"He grabbed me from behind. Why are you still here?" Danny demanded. "Don't you have a date to get back to? I don't need you to ID me now." He flashed his badge and ID at the officer who nodded and returned Danny's weapon. "And I don't need another comedy club session."

"I thought you might need a ride home," Steve said mildly.

"Thank you, but I think I'll stay and look at mug shots. See if I can ID the guy."

"Oh, I know who he is," Kono said bleakly. "So does Lily, and she's willing to swear out an assault and battery complaint."

"You know him?" Danny demanded.

"Yes." Kono took a deep breath. "His name is Puhi Kalakaua."

"Kalakaua? Is he another one of your cousins?"

"Worse. He's my brother," Kono said bitterly.

"Brother!"

"Half-brother," Kono amended. "When Puhi's mother died, my father remarried. Puhi has never forgiven him for marrying a non-Hawaiian. I'm only a half-blood to him and he really despises Chin's side of the family for their 'Kelly' blood."

"We all know Puhi," the HPD officer contributed. "He's been in trouble before for picking fights and bullying haoles, but he and his friends tend to pick on tourists who have planes to catch and they don't cause any real damage and …"

"And he's related to a bunch of cops, so he's weaseled out of any real trouble," Steve guessed.

"That's about it," the officer agreed.

"But now he's assaulted a cop in front of another cop," Kono said grimly.

"I think he's fresh out of free passes," Steve said with a feral grin.

Fujita brought Lily back to take her statement. Catherine tagged along because she hated to miss the excitement.

Lily saw her date — could you really call half a dance a date? — and ran past the officer to hug Danny, who winced at the touch.

"Danny!" Lily exclaimed in worry. With the familiarity of a much longer acquaintance, she tugged his shirt up so all could see the extensive bruising on his side.

Everyone went silent.

"Yes, yes, a full-body slam against a barroom wall will do that," Danny said impatiently, embarrassed by his status as casualty. He was supposed to be the protector, the avenger, not the victim. "They're just bruises. A lot of bruises," he admitted, "but just bruises. Let's move on to arresting the perps who busted up the Sundog."

"And you," Steve said coldly.

"And me," Lily added.

"Especially you," Danny agreed, his blue eyes just as cold as Steve's.

Kono's anger was as hot as Pele's, but she was distracted by a new voice.

"Well, in the morning, you can probably find Puhi hanging out at Jones' Body Shop," said the desk sergeant from his post near the entrance.

"Sgt. Baker! I'm glad to see you back safe and sound," Kono said in real pleasure. He was a friend of her family.

"So, you're part of this Five-0 unit?" Baker asked. "I'm sorry I missed your graduation, by the way."

"So did I, as it turned out. Yes, I'm part of Five-0." She introduced Steve and Danny. "And you know Chin Ho. That's all our team."

Baker made a mental note. "I'll remember, detective, I promise," he told Danny.

The fair-haired detective shrugged. "Hard to keep track when you're in Iraq," he said and rolled his eyes at the unintentional rhyme.

"What were you saying about Kamaka Jones?" Lily asked. "He wasn't at the Sundog."

"He's part of Puhi's Na Kahu group."

Steve raised his eyebrows. "The guardians?"

"Of the true Hawaiian culture," Fujita said ironically.

"'Jones,' doesn't sound very Hawaiian," Danny said.

"Kamaka was adopted," Lily said. "He may promote Hawaiian culture but he's no haole-hater. His dad was the sweetest man."

"Why's he hang around with a schmuck like Puhi?" Danny asked.

"Habit, I guess. We're talking about the neighborhood where Kono and I grew up, Danny. Puhi, Kamaka and I all went to high school together. And Kono and Nan and Monica were about five years behind us. We've all known each other forever," Lily said earnestly. "But I've never liked Puhi. He's always been a bully."

"I'm ready to take your statement, miss," Fujita said to Lily.

"Be right there." She gripped the front of Danny's abused jersey and pulled him to her careful of his bruises.

He bent his forehead to touch hers, bruise to matching bruise.

"It was nice meeting you," Danny said with mild mockery in his formality.

"Despite everything?" Lily asked in real concern.

"Despite everything," Danny assured her.

She smiled bright as daybreak over the Pacific. "You can call me anytime, Danny Williams. Now, don't we have a kiss to finish?"

And they did, heedless of the interested onlookers, holding it until they finally had to come up for air.

Self-composed despite her battered visage, Lily twiddled her fingers in farewell as she followed the officer to his desk.

Wiping lipstick off his mouth, a little dazed, Danny could find nothing to say but "um," and couldn't understand why that made Catherine dissolve into giggles.

The next morning, Kamaka Jones was irritably listening to Puhi Kalakaua boast — for the seventeenth time that morning! — about the haole he'd hassled the night before. The light streaming in the open garage bay door suddenly dimmed.

Three people stood there, shoulder to shoulder, like a posse sauntering down the Western street at high noon. Kamaka didn't know the tall, dark-haired haole in the middle, but he recognized the other two. In fact, he'd been waiting for one of them.

"Aloha, Kono, been expecting you," he said.

"You have?" Puhi said stupidly, gaping at his sister and his cousin and the icy-eyed man between them.

Kamaka shook his head in disgust. "You've been talking all morning about beatin' up one of Kono's friends. You didn't think the lady cop would come after you? The others figured it out. That's why they cut out."

Puhi just stared, as if he couldn't believe his free pass had run out. Kamaka shook his head. "You make me ashamed of my Hawaiian blood."

"Puhi Kalakaua, you're under arrest," Kono said, her voice dripping with frosty disgust.

"You can't!"

"This says she can," Steve answered, holding up his badge.

Puhi tensed as if he might resist arrest. Kono balanced herself on the balls of her feet. Steve and Chin just crossed their arms and looked amused while they blocked the exit.

"Give it up, Puhi," Kamaka said in exasperation. "She's been able to take you since she was nine!"

Puhi made up his mind and moved, spinning and dashing for the rear exit.

"Little cuz was right," Chin commented, unsurprised.

The Five-0 team moved in a line, but not in a hurry, to follow their suspect. Brimming with curiosity, Kamaka followed.

"He's going to get away," he suggested tentatively.

"Danny's watching the back," Steve answered.

"And he's got a score to settle from last night," Chin added.

They saw Puhi fumble the latch open on the back door.

"C'mon," Steve said, hastening his steps.

"Good idea. Your friend might need help," Kamaka said.

"I doubt it, but I want to watch," Steve said with his most wicked little grin. "I've never really seen Danny in action."

"Danny and I aren't brawlers like you two," Chin told his boss and his cousin. "We believe less is more. No wasted motion."

"I think Danny's going to make an exception in this case," Kono offered.

"But isn't the guy Puhi beat up kind of little?" Kamaka ventured.

"You may know your Hawaiian culture, but it was a wise haole who said, 'It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog,'" Steve answered.

Puhi plunged out the back door and folded to an abrupt halt. Danny's strike had elements of the classic clothesline, but Danny would have had to stand on a stepladder to clothesline Puhi at the neck. Danny's reduced version was designed to bend a suspect in half. He called it the "waistline," though sometimes — entirely by accident, of course — the blow landed nearer the groin than the waist.

With a somewhat high-pitched grunt, Puhi jackknifed into the pavement. He struck forehead first on the concrete. That was one bruise avenged, Danny thought.

Danny walked lightly around to face his opponent. A couple of ibuprophen and an hour of stretching had loosened him up for this performance. Tomorrow he expected his bruised side to be too stiff for combat, but today he could manage.

His friends and Kamaka crowded out the door into the small yard that was enclosed by gray cinderblock walls. There were some tools and a small scooter along one wall and oil drums along the back wall of the garage, otherwise the yard was empty, which suited Danny just fine.

The sliding steel gate was chained shut. Chin and Kono moved to block the smaller gate for pedestrian exit. Steve leaned against the doorjamb of the entrance into the garage. Kamaka slipped past to take a seat on an oil drum.

"Hey, Puhi!" Danny shouted in the fallen man's ear. "We were never properly introduced last night. My name is Detective Danny Williams and you're under arrest! You want to come quietly? Please say, no."

The Hawaiian shook sense back into his head. "Where'd you come from?"

"See, one difference between us — besides the whole haole thing — is that you disrespect your sister." Danny tapped his chest. "I, on the other hand, respect her. She said you'd rabbit if she came after you, so I covered the back door. I would have been deeply disappointed if you'd gone quietly with Kono. I was really looking forward to having this discussion with you. But I trusted your sister and here we all are." He gestured at the sunny sky and the interested spectators. "I know you're more used to hitting people from behind, so I'll tell you the rules here. You can surrender or you can go toe-to-toe with me or any of my friends."

The knowing smirk on Danny's face brought Puhi to his feet. He threw a punch, but there weren't two guys holding Danny this time. Danny ducked and planted a quick left-right in Puhi's ample gut.

"That was for Nan and her baby," Danny said, as he danced aside.

He dodged a backhanded blow from Puhi and responded with an open-handed slap to the face that made Puhi's cheeks jiggle like jelly.

"That was for Lily."

Puhi charged with a roar, arms extended to sweep the haole into a bear hug. Danny sidestepped and hooked his foot around the Hawaiian's ankle. As Puhi fell past, Danny gave him a nicely judged shove that sent the suspect into the wall in a full body slam. Another set of bruises avenged.

"Maybe you're right. Toe-to-toe would be a little silly," Danny conceded to his again fallen foe. "I mean, look at the size of you!"

Puhi made no move to get up. He was done.

"No wasted motions," Chin said in approval.

"It's like judo," Kono suggested.

"More like bullfighting," Steve said.

"But Danny, you didn't leave anything for me," Kono complained.

Danny scratched his head. It was her party that had been ruined. She deserved something, even if it was just a bone.

"Book him, Kono," Danno said.