Dude, Where's My Groom?

Part XI

Three years after the wedding.

"Hey lovebirds, how's it going?" Stu asked as he and Alan burst into the new Wenneck household. Phil and Tara had been officially remarried about two and a half years ago, a wedding they actually remembered.

"Dude, my wife is fuckin' crazy." Phil huffed. "She vacuums constantly and she even vacuums the walls. When she sweeps the ceiling she yells 'Die spider babies, die!' Drives me fuckin' nuts." Phil continued to complain to his friends. Stu heard the vacuum running in the back of the house. Alan looks around strangely, while Stu looks extremely awkward. Phil laughs loudly as he punches both of them playfully on the arms. "Ah, I'm just fuckin' with you guys. I love my wife more than the first. We're super happy, and good news; she's pregnant again!"

"I told you not to get her pregnant." Alan warned, reminding him of their conversation all those months ago in that elevator with the missing baby.

"Dude, we're married." Phil said, shrugging. "It happens."

"Again? Jeeze, do you go at it every five seconds?" Stu asked, gesturing to their two other kids -not including Phil's son from his previous marriage- playing outside with Cowboy.

"Yeah, we pretty much fuck like bunnies." Phil said nonchalantly.

"Well congrats I guess." Stu said chuckling.

"Thanks man." Phil gave him that awkward man-hug.

"I told you not to get her pregnant!" Alan reiterated and Phil just looked at him.

"Shorty, get your pregnant ass out here and see our guests!" Phil yelled. They all heard the vacuum click off and the nursery door open.

"Phillip Benjamin Wenneck, call me Shorty one more time." She warned, Phil backed down. By now you'd think he'd know not to mess with a pregnant lady. Hormones. "Oh, hey guys." She brightened at the sight of Stu and Alan. She hadn't seen them in a few weeks. She was already showing signs of a bump.

"Hey, Phil got you pregnant, I wasn't sure if you knew or not. Want me to take him out?" Alan asked, very seriously. She placed her hands on his shoulders and look at him, equally seriously.

"No, I'll be fine." She said, then burst out laughing. "About that, Phil. One crib isn't gonna be enough. We're gonna need a couple if we intend to house these little ones." She said, patting her stomach.

"Yeah, yeah." He said, waving her off, before it registered and he looked at her, shocked.

"Twins, bro, come on." She just smiled and shrugged. He went up to her and kissed her deeply until Alan broke them apart.

"Okay, so now you're double pregnant. Alright, who's guilty?" We just looked at him, eyebrows quirked. "Who cheated on who?"

All four of them burst out laughing. This was their crazy, beautiful, life.

And Alan still carried around that trophy that had 'Number one for finding a police car' inscribed on it, in his Indiana Jones satchel.

A/N: I'm very very very sorry this is so late and it's probably not as great as you were anticipating but whateva.

Now, I know the second one most likely isn't set two years after the first one but this is just how it works. hahaha

I'll probably write one for the second after it comes out on DVD so it'll be a while.

I really hope you guys enjoyed my story!

Good? Bad? Lemme know!