Pairing: Izaya/Kida

Prompt: Kida has a painful crush on Izaya. They finally have sex at Izaya's house, although it hurts him both in mind and body.

Warnings: Dark themes, incest

It was not something to be proud of. Kida made a boisterous display of his life but the deeper undertows were kept hidden from everyone. Even his best friend did not know, could never know, about this slanted darkness that crossed Kida's entire being with secrets. Kida guarded his precious obsession with great care. Lest someone found out.
There was shame but the attraction was all the more irresistible for that. Being a quick judge of character Kida gave great importance to first impressions. That fatidic day when he had finally seen the man behind all the rumors, Orihara Izaya in the flesh, had been scarred into Kida's memory. Smooth, slim, suave and glib. All this Kida admired. From the bouncy way Izaya ambled down the Ikebukuro streets to the fluffy fur that trimmed his jacket Kida was captivated.
But more than that it was the intelligent glitter of cruelty well tempered with mirth that drew Kida in. He could not help it. Like most pathological flirters Kida was at heart skeptical of love but he did not know what else to call this constant presence of Izaya in his thoughts at all times. Izaya mocked him in hot dreams from which Kida woke up to soiled sheets and Izaya mocked him in brief encounters in his waking moments. Kida was terrified of Izaya. Danger was a form of one sided courtship that Kida felt keenly. Meeting Izaya meant cold sweat, trembling legs, being razed out of his comfort zone but despite this, or perhaps because of this, it also meant dizzying excitement.
It was not something to be proud of at all. Roaming dark alleys in the hopes of catching a glimpse of the laughing figure. His mind populated with wild fantasies. Kida knew that the more ensnared he became the more he severed himself from his friends. Surely they would be repulsed if they knew how he masturbated to thoughts of Izaya being the wicked person that he was. He held no illusions as to the true nature of Tokyo's most perilous information dealer.
Izaya was evil. It was part of his charm. There was so much of this borderline torture that Kida could take. It was just an afterthought that amounted to an impulse. He spotted Izaya dallying in some dim backstreet and followed him all the way to Shinjuku. Kida watched him slip into an apartment and took a deep breath. Here was the time to decide. Kida told himself that he could still turn on his heels and leave, never getting involved with Izaya again. But even as the words formed themselves, he headed in the direction of bondage, it could not be called anything else, and it was as if fate or some other greater force had directed him to this spot. Right in front of Izaya's door.
Kida knocked. His heart beat slowly but very loudly in his temples as if sending out a sluggish distress sign that did not want to reach help.
"Come in."
Kida did so. Stylish surroundings engulfed him and cut off all exit routes. The spacious apartment was sparingly furnished but it spelled wealth in the empty space where a desk and a leather swivel chair and sofa stood out in the mostly empty vastness.
"Ah, hello Kida-kun. What brings you to my humble abode?"
Izaya spoke without his eyes leaving the computer screen. Fingers flew across the keyboard. White light mellowed his features into deceptive cordiality. Now that they were face to face Kida realized that he had nothing to say. His bare feet were cold against the polished wooden floor.
"Orihara-san, I was just passing by and-"
"Hmm…that's not exactly true, now is it? You followed me."
Stated as matter of fact. Still avoiding eye contact, setting his own pace effortlessly. This was the inner sanctum of his territory and Kida had walked into it like a willing victim.
"I wanted to talk to you."
"Oh? Is that so, Kida-kun? Heard any tips that you'd care to share?"
Kida felt that Izaya already knew why he was here. And Kida was cornered.
"Nothing like that."
"Am I supposed to guess?"
Izaya finally looked at him over his entwined hangs, elbows on the desk in a slightly predatory pose.