AN: Okay so I'm jumping on the Emily returns story bandwagon. Couldn't help myself. The story idea just wouldn't leave my mind and it affected my writing or "It Was Only One Time" So I'm going to be working on both of then and I hope to be able to get the next chapters for both stories out at a more regular pace.

Disclaimer: Sadly, all characters belong to CBS. Oh the money I would have if they were mine...

Summary: Emily returns from the dead. Will her former team and friends realize that she is in trouble before her depression consumes her.

It's been three years since my death. Three years since JJ walked into that waiting room and lied to our friends saying, "She never made it off the table."

I spent the last three years tracking down Ian Doyle before I was finally successful. I stood in front of him, aimed my gun and fired the shot that ended his threat over me. I'm free and able to return back home to my family. Now, the only question remaining was, did I have a family to return to?

JJ kept me informed in how they were all doing. I know how Garcia stops each morning at my picture that hangs in the BAU hallway. I know how Reid is now distancing himself from any connection he had with the team, hoping to never grow close to them and lose them again like he had with Gideon and me. I know how Morgan almost demolished one of his houses with his bare hands, relieving the anguish he felt for not being able to get to me in time to save me. I know about the pain I caused Rossi, as he had to deal with losing the one person he thought of as his daughter. I know the pain and disappointment Hotch feels from me keeping my initial involvement with Doyle a secret from them all. The hardest for me though is knowing the guilt that JJ continues to feel about keeping the secret of my being alive from the team.

JJ is the only one who is aware of my arrival. She hadn't even told Will or Henry that I was alive. So here I am now, sitting in my car in JJ's driveway. She arranged this barbecue with the team so that I could reunite with them. I, the brave and strong Emily Prentiss am scared senseless to enter that backyard. I feel myself tense up a little as my phone vibrates with JJ's text message.

Everyone is here. Where are you?

I take a deep breath as I send back the reply: In your driveway. I'm scared that they won't understand. I feel my eyes water as I let myself believe that admission.

I won't lie Em. It will be hard for them, but you need to just rip that band-aid off and show yourself instead of letting yourself worry about their reactions.

Okay.

And with that said, I step out of my car and start to walk toward the gate to the backyard. I smile a little as I can hear the laughter coming from Jack and Henry. I can here Morgan teasing Reid about something and it almost feels like I never left. I walk through that gate and let a sad smile appear on my face at the site of my friends, my family.

Henry was the first person to notice me. "Aunt Emmy!" He called as he ran towards me. I could hear the gasps from the group gathered there, but I paid no attention to them as I crouched down as pulled Henry into my arms.

"You're alive?" was the next statement that I heard before I felt Jack's arms wrap around me.

I shifted Henry around so that I could place one arm around each of the boys and I allowed myself to let out a deep sigh before I pulled out of the hug. I wiped the tears from my eyes as I placed each hand on their cheek and whispered to both of them, "I've missed you so much. I am so sorry. Aunt Emmy had to go and catch a really bad guy and I had to pretend that I was dead so that the bad man wouldn't come after you two and everyone else."

"Are you going away again?" asked Henry.

I looked up at JJ. I couldn't look at the rest of them. I didn't want to see the pain that I know would be in their eyes. My eyes traveled back to Henry and I smiled at him and shook my head. "No, Baby. I'm staying this time. I'm not going anywhere. Why don't you both go back to playing while I go and say hello to everyone."

"'Kay. Come on Henry, let's go play soccer."

I smile and watch them run and play soccer before I stand from my crouching position and I walk over to where JJ was standing with a reassuring smile on her face. "Hey," she says to me as she envelopes me in a comforting hug.

"Hi," I answer back and pull myself from her embrace, but JJ kept her hand on my shoulder grounding me with her touch. I force myself to look towards the rest of them. The hurt is so visible in their eyes. "Hey guys."

There are a few moments of silence as they all look at me. I guess they were still trying to make sure that what they were seeing was real. "You're alive," Reid said to me. I can hear the confusion in his voice. I nod my head, but don't say anything to him.

"Three years," said Morgan. "We grieved for you for three years and you've been alive all of this time. And you knew all about this?" He directed that last question to JJ. I knew it. I knew that they wouldn't be able to understand.

I watched as JJ nodded and answered him. "I did."

"And you didn't think that this was something we deserved to know?" I cringed when Morgan raised his voice at JJ. She didn't deserve to be yelled at like that. This was all my fault.

JJ gave a reassuring squeeze to my shoulder as she kept the contact and responded to Morgan. "Of course I thought about that. I thought about it every single day, but I couldn't do anything about it. My hands were tied Morgan. The less people that knew the truth, the safer everyone was."

"We could protect ourselves."

I couldn't hold myself back any longer. Anger took over and I responded to him. "This had nothing to do with your ability to protect yourselves, Morgan. Doyle was not just some Unsub that would go after you or the team. When he fixed his sights on his target, he would slowly torture them by taking everything away from that person. He would break them down mentally before moving in for the kill and ending their life in the worst physical torture you could imagine, worst then a brand on the breast and a stake in the stomach." I could feel the tears building up. Whether they were from sadness or anger, I really couldn't say. "I was his target. You saw those photos when he killed those families. Do you think he would have spared Jack and Henry? No, they would have been the first to go, because the loss of a child tortures so many. Next would have been your families – your mother and sisters, Reid's mother, Will and Kevin." I point towards Will and Kevin when I say their names. "And then, one by one all of you would die. And if by some chance I was selfish enough to sit by and let this all happen, which you now know I was not, I would be next and last, and his revenge would be complete. So don't you sit there and yell at JJ or me and complain that for three years you thought that I was dead and you grieved for me, because I promise you that you wouldn't have lived past the first year. You all had each other. I was alone. I had to fight each and every single day not to call any of you to tell you that I was alive. I cried each time I talked to JJ and I heard how much pain you were all in. All because of my past. I caused it all, so don't you dare blame JJ for any of this."

"Special allowances were made for me to become Emily's handler with the Department of Defense. Emily tracked down Declan and hunted Doyle while trying to stay off of his radar. Doyle was killed last week, fatal shot right between the eyes."

"And Declan?" asked Garcia.

"He is happy and safe with the family I arranged to take him in when I left Doyle 15 years ago," I answered with a small smile on my face. "Thankfully, Doyle never found out where he was and he was safe the entire time.

I could feel the hold on my tears slipping as I remembered those three long years alone. "I don't expect you to just welcome me back without as if nothing happens. I am sorry for all of the pain that I caused each of you. I have a meeting with Strauss on Wednesday. We will be discussing my future with the FBI. I will have to go through a psych eval. on Monday and a physical on Tuesday, before she decides which positions she will be offering me, if she offers me any at all. I would hope for the chance to return to the BAU, but that will all decide on you. At my request, Strauss has placed the team on stand down for three days, during which she is going to meet with each of you and ask you about whether you think you can work with me again. I beg of you to be honest with her. She will tell me on Wednesday if I have a future with the BAU or not."

"Why wasn't I informed of this?" asked Hotch. He clearly was upset that I knew more of this situation than he did.

"I begged Strauss to give me 24 hours to give you the heads up before she contacted you herself. I am sure that you will have an e-mail by this evening with the notice."

"So you thought coming here and revealing yourself would help us to decide that you should be back?" asked Reid with an attitude that reminded me of the tine when he was dealing with his addiction to dilaudid.

"Of course not Reid. I didn't want you to find out through an e-mail or when you first saw me walk through the halls of the building." I looked towards Garcia, "Or for you to worry when my picture was missing from the Wall of Remembrance. I don't expect for you to tell Strauss anything but the truth. If it is one important lesson I learned from my five years working with all of you, it was that the team relies on the trust they have in each other." Tears no freely dripped from my eyes. I wiped them and then turned to JJ. "I guess I was right," I told her. With a small, sad smile, the emotion pours through my words as I continue, "Seems that I haven't lost any of my profiling abilities. I will give you a call in a few days."

"Don't go, Em," JJ pleads.

I take a step away from her and shake my head. "I should go. I know what the answer will be once I meet with Strauss and if I stay here any longer, it will just be uncomfortable for everyone. I ruined the day as it is. I'm sorry."

And without another word, I left the backyard. I drove two blocks before I had to pull over when my vision was blurred from tears.

Please let me know what you think.