I think, therefore I am. Therefore, if I think I own X Men, I do…not. How is that fair?

The girl sitting at the bus stop wore leather and could be no more than fifteen. She looked about her curiously at the sights and breathing in the smells. There were certainly a lot of voodoo shops in New Orleans. It seemed be their most prominent type of stores here. Here near the river, the smell of fish and sea salt warred with the spices floating from the restaurants nearby and the exhaust from cars. She couldn't even begin to describe the noise, so many people, so many cars, so much going on.

But she wasn't here to sight-see. She wasn't a tourist. She had a mission to do, unofficial as it was. Her target should be coming through here soon if the guy she'd 'talked' to earlier had been telling the truth. For his sake, she hoped he had.

As she waited, her green eyes scanned the crowds of people going by. Even as evening started to fall upon the city, there were just as many, if not more, people roaming about, headed this place or there. She absent-mindedly categorized the people she saw from human to mutant, threat levels, police officers to drug dealers, businessmen to housewives.

HYDRA had believed in covering all the basics to surveillance.

After three buses had come and gone, and she had not moved, she finally saw him. Across the street, tall, lanky, red hair man walking with a somewhat shorter blond, more muscular build. They weren't who she was after, but they would lead her right to him. She waited until they went between a bar and another voodoo store before she stood to follow.

The traffic here was insane, the drivers even more so, but she wasted no time waiting for the flow of cars to stop and dashed across the road. Once she was out there, they slowed enough for her to reach the other side. Ignoring the honking cars, the girl tracked them down the alley they went down, subtly sniffing the air for their scent.

By the time she entered, they were nowhere in sight, but she continued to follow their scent through back alleys and side streets. They led her through an inner maze of New Orleans backstreets. It was fortunate there were few people back here, and the ones that were left her alone. She'd hate to waste time getting past such minor obstacles.

Eventually, their scent led her to a metal door. With unknown numbers on the other side, she thought briefly to find an alternate entry, but the windows were at the front and had bars. Too noticeable of an entry. The roof surely had some type of ventilation, but she did not feel like squeezing through the A/C.

She was about to gain entry her own way before a silly thought occurred to her. A frown creased her brow at the absurdity of it, but she humored the thought anyway. She tried the door knob and pushed, and the door swung in easily.

She almost laughed as she opened the door just enough to get through. Inside, she found herself in a short, narrow hall, one door on her right, one in front, two on the left. Light only shone from under two doors, music and talk with obnoxious squeals of laughter came from the one at the end, and of course that's where their trace led her.

Naturally, she followed.

With the door open, the noise blasted her ears, the smell of booze, smoke, and something else she didn't dare name nearly gagged her. She snorted through her nose and shook her head but quickly moved on. She'd rather avoid dealing with a bouncer; there was no need for him to get hurt.

The door she came through was at the end of the long bar, and she eased away from it without notice. She moved between tables and people to avoid being seen by anyone who looked like they might care about the severely underage girl in their little club.

She spotted them again, Red and Blond Boy, seated at a card table with three other men, one bald and bearded, one with dark hair and sharp eyes, and one – oh. There he is.

Leather coat across his shoulders, fedora, and a flash of red eyes as he glances at the men at the table with a cocky smirk. The cards glide through his fingers with practiced ease, as he doesn't even glance at them while talking to the bald one. The table erupts in laughter, and she almost hates to interrupt.

But she didn't come all this way to back off at the last minute.

As she walked toward them, she saw him look up at her, but his gaze dropped back to his game.

"Remy Lebeau?"

If the sudden attention of the men bothers her, she doesn't show it. They glance at each other with a mix of amusement and wariness. The girl doesn't look all that threatening, but Bella Donna doesn't look insane. A man just never knew.

"That depends," he drawls as he spares her a glance, "Should I know a sister, friend, or cousin a' yours?"

Red snickered a little, and Bald-Beard cast them an annoyed look. The girl pulled a card from her front pocket and held it up for them to see. Though Remy's face remained impassive, his eyes narrowed minutely. Truly, if she didn't already know it was him, she'd think she had the wrong guy with that face. And if she had thought that, Red's open mouth shock, Blond Boy's bug-eyed stare, Bald-Beard's disbelieving snort, and Bright Eyes outright laughed.

"Where did you get that?"

"You recognize it then. Good."

"Remy, this ain' the fille ya tol' us 'bout, hein?" Red asked, "I mean, you said she was young, mais –"

"I'm not her," she tilted her head to give a look, "Besides that, he's not my type anyway."

"Oh, burn," Blond Boy murmured.

"I'm only gonna ask you once more," he spoke over their smother laughter, "Where ya get the card?"

"Kitty got it from her drawer. You'd probably know her as Shadowcat. She thought you'd need some kind of proof."

"Proof of what? Why are you here?"

"To deliver a message from Kitty concerning the girl you gave this card to."

"Is she in trouble?"

"Oh, no. No, she's fine. I'm supposed to be relaying this overly complicated, dramatic speech I was forced to memorize, but I'll just cut to the chase. Basically, from what I understand, Rogue really liked you, she's now getting over you, and 'making eyes'," she rolled her own eyes as she said that, "at Joseph, and he doesn't seem to mind. Kitty says that if you don't get up there and 'save Rogue from making the biggest mistake of her life."

"Wait, wait," Blond Boy said, "You're tryna get my cousin to go back North 'cause the girl he kidnapped is gettin' a new boyfriend?"

"No, I'm trying to get him up North because Kitty won't shut up about it! I swear, if I have to hear one more word…"

The dark haired girl trailed off and heaved a calming breath before continuing.

"Now, you're coming back with me so I won't have to hear Kitty whine at me for not 'fixing Rogue's love life', and you will never tell anyone I did this. None of you," she sent a dark glare to all of them, "or I will hunt you all down," she held up a fist, and two blades slid out, "and make you scream. You have two hours to say your goodbyes and pack, and we'll leave together to ensure you don't get lost."

Remy stared at her a moment before laughing loudly.

"What's your name, petite?"

"Laura."

"Laura, merci. I'm gonna enjoy tellin' Jean Luc jus' why I can't be here to marry that sorcière."

Because he was only being threatened by a girl half his size to run up North to 'save the girl' that helped save his life. An appeal to Jean Luc's 'honor'. Well, yes. That should be an interesting conversation. Oh, and Tante was gonna just love this.

"Better yet, you gotta meet him," he said with a wicked gleam in his eyes.

"Is that such a good idea?" Bald-Beard asked.

"That is his choice," Laura said, "If it will move this process along faster, I will meet this Jean-Luc," she said with a flawless accent, "but we should go now."

"Of course, petite," Remy said as he stood, now looking completely amused. "Let's go."

As the two walked to the door, Emil, Theoren, Henri, and Etienne all had the same thought.

"What just happened?"

In New York, Kitty answered her phone on the first ring.

"Hello?"

"It's me."

"Laura! Did you see him? Did you talk to him?"

"Yes. We'll be on route within two hours."

"Oh, that is awesome! I so need to charge my camera. The look on Rogue's face is gonna be priceless!"

"Yeah. Great."

"And we could totally do double dates now. This will be, like, so awesome!"

Laura merely grunted in reply while her mind played through the implications of this. On one hand, Kitty wouldn't be moaning to her about how Rogue is 'so miserable' without Remy. On the other hand, she would probably start gushing about how 'cute' the Southerners would be or something.

Laura could only sigh and accept the lesser of two evils. At least, that's what she hoped this would be.

A/N: Just how did Remy end up with the X Men? This story will have a few scenarios. Feel free to expand on them, just message me first, m'kay?

Do you know what a forum is? You don't? Well, it's really neat. I have a couple but the one y'all need to know about is the 'X Men Evo Fanfiction Challenge' forum. Quite a mouthful for such a little forum. But that's only because it's new. The idea of it is better explained at the site, (because I don't really want this all up in my story taking up half the story length, y' knaw min?) which you can get to by going to my profile, clicking on 'My Forums' and BLA-DAM! You're there.