Letters to You
I do NOT own Degrassi. But you all know that already.
You probably don't know this but you complete me, in so many ways...so I'm going to write them down for you and maybe some other things that you might not know about me. I hope you're ready.
Number one: On the day of our first date, I spent the entire day with butterflies in my belly. I went through my clothes looking for just the right thing to wear. The look on your face is forever etched into my brain, that smile the little glint in your eyes when you looked me over. You told me I looked great, but I would have looked great in a brown bag. You kept that smile on my face the entire day, and night. There was no pressure from you at the end of the night; you became my best friend and later boyfriend.
Number two: The night I got in a big fight with my parents, you were there. I didn't even tell you that I was upset, you just knew and you were there to get me. You held me all night while I told you what happened, cried and then you made me laugh and smile and just reminded me all over again why I love you. Did you know that? I knew within the first month that I loved you, though I never said the words. I wasn't waiting for you to say them first; I was just waiting for the right time.
Number three: I thought I was my heart was breaking the day we had our first serious fight, you had lied to me the entire time and when I found out the tears I cried weren't even enough to make me feel anything but lost. We yelled at each other and I ended up saying the words I had been holding back. I remember it so clearly. "Why the fuck does it even matter? We weren't together then." "Because I love you! And you lied." My hand went to my mouth and with my hand on the door knob I turned it and tried to run.
Number four: You didn't let me, your arms wrapped around my waist pulling me into your chest. You didn't say the words back, in fact your words made me cry even more. "I won't say it back, not now." I thought you didn't feel the same, I thought we were done. I had stopped listening even when you turned me around to face you. "Listen to me Alli, I'm not saying them now because it's expected, we just fought and I won't use it as way to make you feel better." My heart felt heavy and my face was wet with tears but your lips closed over mine and you held me that night too.
Number five: The night you said "I love you." Was unexpected and caught me by surprise. We had just finished watching the dumbest movie I had ever watched, we were laughing and carrying on when out of know where you said it. "I love this, I love you." I hadn't said it since our fight but I smiled and said that I loved you too. We went back to watching stupid movies and laughing and just being us.
Number six: You are the one for me. Simple as that, I can't imagine my life without you. Every day with you is a day that makes me happy. Together were perfect, and when I'm not with you it feels like something is missing in me. I hope I never have to know what it's like to be without you. But if it ever happens, I want you to know that every memory I have will be cherished and the tears that fall will be for what were missing.
That's six reasons why I think you complete me, I could go on for days about all the things that make me love you, and why. I know we fight, I know there have been tears shed and I also know that there will be more fighting and more tears and I will want to walk away, or you will. But I also know that in the end we won't that we'll still have each other. Things worth having usually aren't easily kept, and I think your worth having in every part of my life. That's just how I feel though.
Owen's side.
Looks like we're actually doing this I thought you were joking when you suggested it, I mean I have trouble saying how I feel and you want me to write it down pen to paper... I hope you know I'm only doing this because it's you and well I want to read whatever you wrote.
So I hope you're prepared for things that make no sense what's so ever Bhandari.
Number one: You drive me crazy, and only half the time in a good way, the other half I have the need to shake sense into that pretty little head of yours. You do things that make me so mad, like when that ex of yours came back into our part of town, Johnny or whatever. I was away for the weekend and I come home to find out you had gone out for coffee with him. I remember the entire argument. "Owen you're being unrealistic, it was just a coffee, nothing happened. Nothing would have happened." A week later, I had to talk to him and tell him you weren't interested in dating him, that you were already in a happy relationship.
Number two: I love how you take my shirts home with you sometimes, especially when you know we won't see each other in a couple days, whenever I ask what the point of it is, you always tell me the same thing. "Makes the time go faster, and I'm still surrounded by you." You know sometimes I'll ask just to get the answer, I love that you want me around you even if it's just in the way of you wearing my shirt to bed because I can't be there to hold you.
Number three: I love how you stood up to your parents for me. Meeting them was one of the scariest days of my life, I knew they wouldn't like me; I wasn't what they wanted for their daughter. Hell there are times when I think I'm not who you should be with too. But you stood up for me, for us and I think I fell for you a little more. It was an all out screaming match and you just told them point out that you loved me, and they should be happy that you'd found someone who wanted to take care of you and was willing to deal with your mistakes...but babe they weren't mistakes you just fell down and needed a hand back up. I'm glad it was mine.
Number four: This whole thing is silly; I show you how I feel every day. I love you. That's all there is to it really, I want to spend all the time I can showing you this. I don't want to be without you. That's as emotional as I get babe, you're lucky I even wrote this down where other could potentially see it, since I know you're going to keep it.
Number five: What the hell one more, you're all I need babe.
There I wrote the letter, you'll read it and know some of the things that go on in my head; I'm not worried because these should be things that you already know. If you don't then I need to do a better job at showing you these things. You mean a lot to me and I hope you know that I'd do anything I could to make sure you were happy. I'm ending this here, that's enough emotional word vomit for one day.
A/N Just something that came to my head so I wrote down...I don't know how I feel about it.
I'll write their reactions on reading the letters soon.
Hope everyone is well. Please review.
Love.
P. Kity.