A/N: Okay, I haven't uploaded something in a while, so here it is. I found this in my backup folder. A thing I keep that I just fill with random little ideas that come to me instead of sleeping or finishing my classwork like a good student should. And tonight I'm going to play my shiny new Marvel v. Capcom 3, WHOOT! And then tomorrow will be spent doing all the work I SHOULD have done yesterday and today, lol.

Disclaimer: Devil May Cry and its characters belong to Capcom

Pairing: DantexNero established relationship.

Warnings: Heiny biting. Pretty much it.

Dedications: This is for all my fans. Love you guys. Sorry this is so short, but just think of it as an interlude before the next big production!

-Rock and a Hard Place-

The sky was clear and bright. Birds were singing peacefully in the distance as a soft spring breeze wafted through, tossing about fresh grass and a bit of dust from the nearby dirt road. It was a rather lovely day if one stopped to look at it.

All of the beauty of nature was lost on Nero, however. Not for the reason one would think either.

Such a nice day, a person wanted to get out and enjoy it; which for the young devil hunter had come in the perfect package of a job to go out and kill some demons. There hadn't been any hitch in his day at all. He'd gotten up, had an uninterrupted shower – for once – and Dante hadn't eaten all of his waffles, so he got to have breakfast that wasn't cold, leftover pizza. Said old man hadn't heckled him much either, which was only a plus in Nero's book.

And then the great weather and a decent paying job, everything was just right for once in his life.

Until now, that is.

"Just pull!" Nero snapped, voice muffled thanks to his head, shoulders – hell, his entire upper body – being stuck inside of a hole. They'd killed the demons, no problem. One of them, though, had snatched the teen's prized revolver, Blue Rose, and tried to retreat, hiding away in a small opening in the still standing wall of a ruined building.

Nero didn't think; he just ran after the damn thing. He'd had to climb a bit to be able to reach the hole in the crumbling stone wall, but he made it, stretching his devil bringer in just enough to fling the thieving demon out into the open where Dante made himself useful and promptly shot it. Then gloated about his great aim. Nero hadn't really been listening, too intent on crawling into the narrow opening so he could find where the hell that demon had stashed his gun. Thankfully, he did find it and just barely managed to wrap the fingers of his right hand around the smooth barrel.

Then came the part that made his day go from great to…not so great.

He was stuck.

With only his hips and legs hanging out of the hole and both arms trapped in there with the rest of him, Nero couldn't push himself back out. So he demanded that Dante pull him out.

"Why?" Dante's voice came to him in the darkened hole from outside, and Nero could clearly hear the amused tone.

And then his day went straight from 'not so great' to complete and utter shit-hole.

"Dante!" He tried to brace a foot against the wall to push, but his boot just slipped off the wall and he couldn't reach the ground.

For his part, Dante just couldn't believe his luck. So far, today had been rather boring. He'd been too tired to get up as early as Nero always did to go accost him in the shower, and then when he finally did get up, he was still too tired to poke fun at the kid. Then a job came in and it was work, work, work. The only highlight until now had been that Nero was in a relatively good mood. And when Nero was in a good mood, Dante got laid. Simple as that.

But now…oh, now, his day had turned around completely.

The elder hunter had thought of warning his partner that the hole his gun had disappeared into was too small to go crawling in, but Nero was already scrambling up the wall and yanking the little demon out to go fishing for his weapon.

Dante grinned as he now had a great shot of Nero's adorable ass poking out from the wall, feet hanging about half a foot off the ground. And then the kid had stopped wriggling around and gone very quiet. That was when his day became just awesome.

Nero was stuck.

"Don't be an asshole, just pull me out!" Nero's irritated demand broke through his thoughts and Dante managed to keep from laughing aloud.

"Again I have to ask: why? You got yourself in there." Dante replied, walking up closer with a smirk.

Nero was going to say something else, but forgot what he was going to say when he felt broad hands that could only be Dante's settle on his hips. Well okay, for once the old man was going to listen and help him. Maybe the day wasn't completely ruined…

But he jumped when, instead of getting pulled free, he felt a sharp little prick of pain on his ass.

"Did…did you just bite me?" Nero asked, at first incredulous, and then infuriated when Dante just laughed openly at him. Growling, he kicked a foot back, connecting with something solid, but whatever he hit on the pervert wasn't enough to knock him away, because those hands on his hips just curved around and started groping him. "Dante!"

"I can't help it." The elder said calmly. "I just love your ass and here it is, begging for me to touch it."

Nero tried to kick him a few more times, unsuccessfully, before he gave up. He wasn't getting out of here anytime soon.

When the kid gave up, Dante happily enjoyed the present opportunity. Of course, he knew it was too good to last, and was proven right when Nero said a bit too sweetly,

"I should probably mention that we aren't having sex tonight. Or ever again if you don't pull me out. A shame. I'll miss you."

Dante's good mood suddenly dropped again as did his grin. "...well if that's the way you're going to be, enjoy your new home." He replied and dropped his hands, turning to walk away. With that ultimatum, he was in a lose – lose situation. Why bother?

"W-what?" Nero started kicking his legs again, struggling to get free. "You're not going to just leave me here are you?" No answer. "Dante? DANTE!"