A Romance of Errors

Disclaimer: Azumanga Daioh belongs to Kiyohiko Azuma and JC Staff. This is a story made by a fan. Kudos to my sister and Elred Bluegreen for helping me build up the foundations of this fic. Thanks to Hollow 28 and Miz-KTakase for a few post-publishing corrections.

Chapter 1: The New Teacher on the Block

The school bell rung, signaling the start of the day. All the students went in or, if late, rushed to their classrooms. As a routine, everyone replaced their shoes and put on their slippers. The bell rang and all the students went to their respective classes. It would just another day for everyone, except for Miss Yukari's class. Something is coming up this morning which was talked about since last Friday. A new teacher will take over Yukari's homeroom and English class. Everyone wanted to find out.

Naturally, everyone's curiosity of the new teacher set the rumor mill on fire, and it seemed like everyone had their own idea as to exactly who it could be... some theories more plausible than others.

"No." Yomi replied, exasperated.

"But, Yomi, it's..." Tomo tried to convince her to listen to her wonderful theory.

"No," Yomi replied.

Tomo puffed out her cheeks indignantly at her friend's flat-toned denials. "Think about it, we know that he's gonna be short, stubby, and old. Of course he'll be a cultist fanatic!"

"Tomo," Yomi, the taller of the two, adjusted her glasses, more in annoyance than actually having to move them. Tomo could do this at times... get on her nerves so badly that all Yomi was capable of was sitting back and taking it. "First of all, we haven't heard anything about him." Tomo opened her mouth to speak. "And Osaka, Kagura, and... whoever that girl was you were sitting with yesterday, are not reliable sources."

"They are perfectly reliable-!" Tomo retorted, before Yomi gestured in Osaka's direction.

Osaka was always a little... unique, to say the very least, and her eccentric habits often gave the illusion that she was dim-witted, stupid, and even insane. That mind, however, was her greatest strength, supplying her with a vivid imagination... that could easily be channeled into the strangest pursuits. Such as, right now, she was making her very best attempt to catch one of the dust specks in her eye, repeatedly poking her closed eyelids instead.

"You were saying?" Yomi asked dryly. "Wait until the teacher shows up before you put stock into anything Osaka says." Tomo just shut up. For a few seconds...

She then asked, "What if he's fat... like you?" Yomi sizzled for a few seconds, and then exploded.

"JUST SHUT UP ALREADY!" She then chased the wildcat all around the classroom. As they did, Chiyo and Osaka were talking about the same thing.

"Osaka," Chiyo lightheartedly remind her air-headed friend, "I don't think he's a space alien."

"But you never know if he's human or something." She said, sounding like a kitty's meow trying to herald the end of the world and everyone who heard it sweat dropped. She went on, "So what's his specialty?"

"Do you mean his subject?" Chiyo asked slowly, "Or something else?"

"I don't know," Osaka airily replied. "Maybe it's his hair."

Chiyo sweat dropped, "What does that have to do with hair?" At the farther end of the classroom, Kaorin is fixated on the coolest girl of the class, and maybe of the entire school, Miss Sakaki. Kaorin had always worshiped her almost every day, gazing at her from the shadows and thinking about how 'cool' she is. She was everything most students hoped to be: tall, beautiful, smart, athletic and oh so cool. She hoped to approach her but she feels intimidated by her silent exterior. She seemed so... distant... so removed from other people. She imagined what it would like if they could be friends. And be more than friends... Then her musing stopped when two people entered the room. One of them is the principal, Dr. Yonehiko Ihihara , and the other is a good-looking young man.

"Good morning, class 2-A," announced the principal.

"Good morning, Dr. Ihihara," the entire class replied.

"Good morning, class," greeted the man cheerily with a sunny smile that caught the attention of most of the girls. "I am proud to introduce to you your new Social Studies and homeroom teacher, Satoru Yasunobu."

"I'm Satoru Yasunobu," greeted the new teacher, "and how may I be of service?" His voice sounded like crystal to most of the girls. He sounded a whole lot different than any teacher they would expect; and looks a lot different too.

"He had just graduated last spring and has applied for tenure here." the principal said. "I'm sure he'll have a wonderful time with you."

"Yeah, like we're grade school kids," Tomo said under her breath, smirking, "I wonder if he'll start with ABC." But most of the other girls have a different opinion. They studied the new teacher for a while. He is tall quite tall and slender, his eyes are narrow, sparkly and delicate, his face is beautifully sculpted and radiating a sunny aura. The girls were mesmerized by his appearance. They quiver like jelly on a hot car seat.

Osaka noticed that something was a bit odd.. For a few seconds, her mind was analyzing what it was until she came to her conclusion. She asked Chiyo, "Chiyo, is that a new student?"

Chiyo regarded her friend, "Oh no, he's our new homeroom teacher, Mr. Yasunobu." She noted.

The airhead then said, "Can I be a homeroom teacher, too?"

"Miss Osaka, he's not a student."

"Ooohhh... he's kinda young to be a teacher, isn't he?" Osaka wasn't the first person to think that thought. Chihiro was, like most of the other girls, staring at him with wonder.

"Just look at him," she suddenly pulled Kaorin to herself by the arms, "isn't he so handsome?"

Kaorin was a bit jolted by that. She didn't realize it until now. She looked at him and noted about how handsome he was.

"You're right, Chihiro," she replied, "he's quite good-looking." But not as cool as Miss Sakaki, she thought.

She asked her friend, "Is he a new student?"

"Student?" Chihiro said, "He's no student, he's our new homeroom teacher!"

"Huh?" Kaorin was perplexed. She couldn't believe it. The young boy standing in front of them is so young, yet he's a high school teacher? First they have Chiyo-Chan, ten years old and transferred to high school on the count of her excellent IQ. Does he have that kind of IQ as well? It raised a lot of questions for her.

"Please excuse me as I will attend to other matters," replied Dr. Ihihara. He stepped out and Yasunobu took the floor.

He began, "Let me tell you a little about myself. I am Satoru Yasunobu. I'm twenty years old and I've graduated from Kyoto University with a degree..." He gave brief description of his life.

Yomi was genuinely surprised by the new teacher. He looked like he should still be in college;he is twenty years old, but he looked eighteen. It's more surprising than Chiyo-Chan's first day at school here. She also felt rather strange around the teacher. She looked at him some more...

"Hey Yomi!" Tomo screamed at her ears.

"AHHH!" She was startled by her friend's antics. She snapped at her, "What the hell was that for?"

"Nothing really, Yomi," she replied with an annoyingly wide grin, "I'm just messing with you!"

"But did you have to shout like that-?" Yomi was about to give her the patented double chop.

"Hey, settle down," Mr. Yasunobu said to the girls, "it's my first day on the job and everybody's start to get a little worked out." He laughed somewhat nervously. Most of the girls just stared at him... with wide smiles. He sweat-dropped.

"Okay, we will begin our first lesson of the day," Yasunobu explained and discussed from the book. Yomi went to him listening attentively as always. Chihiro turned to Chiyo.

"Twenty years old? Wow, Chiyo, he's just like you! Except..." She swooned. "As handsome as he is smart..."

"Why are all of you acting like that? It's so strange..." The only comparable effect Chiyo could name was that with Mr. Kimura. All of the girls, universally, were revolted by him, so much as to jam the doorway at the very instant the bell rang, unlike the guys, who would flock to him and share their stories of romantic rejection. Here, it was the other way around, clearly...

"He's still a teacher, though. That doesn't mean anything to you?" She asked anxiously, not wanting to have some huge scandal take place.

"He's only a few years older than most of us!" The girl retorted, "Besides... well, I guess you might not understand. You're not quite of that age yet."

"Well... Chihiro?" Chiyo turned the other way, "Is this normal or something? I'm not understanding this at all..."

"Not now, Chiyo." Chihiro, who was furiously scribbling something in her notebook, almost snapped at Chiyo, but caught herself. Her feverish scrawling was to keep her from paying attention to how Mr. Yasunobu looked, which was amazing. "I'm busy here."

"Alright," she replied, turning back to her to the board to jot down notes. So was every other girl in the classroom with the boys trying to keep up.

It was lunch time at the cafeteria, everyone gathered to eat. The teacher was the talk of the mess hall. Almost every student was talking about him. He was the most-talked-about person since Chiyo first came to school. The girls sat together on a table with their lunches.

"Wow," Yomi noted, "that Yasunobu guy's an instant celebrity." She was eating a piece of her pork cutlet.

"Yeah," Tomo said happily, "even more than Yukari or Kimura."

"At least he'd be a bit normal compared to them," Kagura said, "He does remind me of Chiyo but other than that, he'll probably be just an average teacher."

"Hope so," Yomi noted, "especially with all the attention he just got lately." She looked at the tables occupied with girls, whose eyes are on the new teacher who passed through the canteen. After a few minutes of walking he reached the teachers' lounge.

"You must be pretty lucky to be here at such a young age," Minamo noted as she ate, "this is probably the single most phenomenal moment since Chiyo Mihama entered school."

"The prodigy?" Yasunobu grinned broadly. "I'm flattered to be compared with her."

"From what I see, you were the same as her. Entering high school early, studying overseas... and I hope she'll come back to teach someday, too." Minamo laughed, slurping up some noodles. "Honestly, you picked the perfect classroom to teach. That means Yukari's going to be out of my hair until they find another classroom for her."

"Yukari... oh, Tanizaki. Right... she had an interesting record."

"Oh, I don't need a record. She's my friend. Most of the time." That came out rather dry.

"What do you mean?" He was puzzled.

"Let's just say that she hangs around me most of the time," She said plainly, "she's a bit off at times."

"Oh... really?" Not sure what to answer, he turned away from Nyamo. It turned out that he was now facing Yukari.

"I see that you're gonna have to move to a new classroom, Miss Yukari. I hope you don't take it too hard," he said to her.

Yukari didn't reply verbally and just leaned her head against her hand. She had a smile that reached all the way up to her ears and a gaze in her wide-open eyes that was rather... predatory.

"No...," she finally drooled, still not letting go of that stare, "not at all."

"Okay," he said, "I heard that you're quite eccentric. Is it true?"

"Depends... do you like eccentric?" Yukari inquired, "'Cause I can go either way. Just ask Nyamo here..."

"Excuse me one second." Interrupting Yukari's increasingly suggestive tirade, Minamo pulled Yukari aside to teach her a few rules.

"Oh, what?" There was a devious grin on Yukari's face, "It makes a good story."

"A story's all it is because it's not true! You had fun with that rumor back in high school! What are you now, twenty-seven, or twelve?"

"Well, hey, it kept all the boys from calling you, didn't it? I was just doing you a fav-" Bad move. Reminding Kurosawa of that time in her life caused her to snap.

"THAT WAS NOT A FAVOR!" Yasunobu heard Minamo screaming, followed by a loud crash and the sounds of a life-or-death struggle.

"HEY! It was only a jo-" *Thud* "OWW!"

"IT'S NOT FUNNY!"

"Whoa, what're you doing with that coffee machi-AUUUGHH!"

While Yasunobu listened in horror, two other teachers passed behind him, remarking idly on the situation.

"Sounds like Kurosawa and Tanizaki are going at it again."

"Yeah, who's your money on this time?"

"I'd say Kurosawa. She's the PE teacher, after all. Besides, you haven't seen what she can do with the coffee machine."

"Hit her with it?"

"Worse."

Yasunobu felt that he wanted to intervene but seeing how hard they're struggling and the fact that he's a novice, he decided to go back to his seat.

"I would like to have a cup of coffee now," he said awkwardly, stretching his collar.

"Here you go, senpai," said a student who most probably didn't know that he was a teacher, absentmindedly gave him a cup of coffee, as if almost on cue.

"Um, thank you." He said gratefully, "I think I recognize you from this morning, Miss. What's your name?"

"It's Kasuga, but everyone calls me Osaka. Thanks for asking." Osaka smiled warmly at him.

"Yes, I saw that name on the roll call..." Yasunobu took a sip of the coffee, nodding. "Hm, not bad, Miss K... Osaka."

"It's my own special blend." Osaka kept smiling, with her even gaze staying level with Yasinubo's. She looked and sounded innocent enough, but... for some reason, he began to feel uneasy again.

"Special... blend?"

"Very special. It's a secret."

"I see..." Yasinubo looked down at the coffee again, his eyes widening. "Well, um, it's a little hot, so I'll wait for it to cool down a bit, and I've got to get going, to um, grade my attendance sheet, I mean, eh... check my attendance sheet. I'll see you!"

"Bye." Osaka waved slowly.

As she slowly walked away back to the canteen, Yasinubo turned around and saw the happy stares at the window of the lounge as what amounted to be dozens of high school girls. Most of them blushed and looked down when they noticed he was looking at them, others just kept taking in the sight. Some even waved at him endearingly. Deciding he'd had a strange enough day already, Yasinubo made quick his 'escape' from the room. They weren't kidding when they said this school's weird, he thought.

"Senpai..." Some of them dreamily whispered as they watched him walk out.

"Senpai?..." Some of the boys, curious with the large gathering of girls at the lounge, within earshot repeated the word, dumbfounded. Meanwhile, at another table, Kimura felt pretty unusual, not that anyone of his personality would feel normal in any way. He thought to himself, I don't know why but this new guy's making things a bit... odd.

Osaka, after trekking from the lounge, finally waddled back to her friends. She smiled spacey as she sat down with them.

"Hey Osaka," Yomi said, "don't tell me that you gave the new teacher your special coffee."

Osaka smiled even more and nodded.

"What's that 'special blend' of yours, Osaka?" Kagura asked.

"It's my special blend," Osaka slowly repeated, not minding Kagura's inquiry to the contents of her 'special' coffee.

"We know that," Yomi replied with her arms crossed, "what's in it?"

"It's a secret," Osaka replied as though she's talking to thin air. Then she let out a slight giggle.

Yomi finally said, "Don't ask her. She's hopeless."

At the faculty room, everyone talked to the new teacher. They were very impressed by his academic record and his meteoric rise to be a teacher. At the background, the two teachers looked on, tired from their resent spate. As Nyamo tended to her papers, she looked at Yukari, who hasn't packed her things yet. She rested her head on her hand upright, almost relaxed. The PE teacher ignored her and went back to her gear when Yukari spoke.

"Isn't the new guy so handsome?" Yukari said dreamily.

"Enough of your predatory rants, Yukari," Nyamo reminded her.

Yukari is a bit persistent. "Don't be such a killjoy, Nyamo," she went on, "you must have an opinion about him."

"Oh really..." Before she said anything else, she thought about what Yukari just said. It's quite... true. She blushed awkwardly ,"Yeah... I think he is."

Yukari smirked, "So you do have a crush on him. What a surprise from the mature Minamo Kurosawa."

"No I don't!" Nyamo quickly denied, "How about you?"

"Oh me?" Yukari quipped, "Maybe you can teach how to tie."

"SHUT UP!" Nyamo retorted.

"Do what you want, failure in love~." Yukari taunted.

"SHUT UP, DANG IT!" Then the faculty room went loud with renewed fighting after their brief 'ceasefire' from the lounge.

Now it's homeroom. entered the classroom to tell more about himself. It was very silent with only hushed whispers from most of the girls who sat in eagerly, their eyes widened into a cute doll-like appearance. The boys are quite clueless.

"Wow, you went to school that young," one of the girls commented.

"Yes, it's true," he replied happily. "When I was told that I was gonna advance to high school at that age, it was quite a surprise for me." He laughed.

"Wow," Osaka said numbly, "just like Chiyo-chan." Everyone turned their eyes at the child prodigy.

Ever bashful, Chiyo blushed and looked down at her textbooks.

"Yes, a lot like Miss Mihama. Except I believe she may have had about a year's headstart on even me, right? I'll have to look again." Yasinubo laughed.

"Tell me again why you guys are so interested in Mr. Yasunobu?" Kaorin whispered. The audacity of her words nearly caused Chihiro to jump in shock, and she whipped her head around to glare at Kaorin.

"Are you kidding me? Have you not seen his face?" She shot back, "And he's only a few years older than me! I mean, us. But you get what I mean!"

"But he's a teacher," Kaorin pointed out uneasily. "Don't they have rules or some-"

"REALITY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT!" her friend snapped

"Inoue-san? Is there a problem?"

Yasunubo's voice brought her back to reality. "Oh! M-Mr. Yasunobu, no, no, there's nothing wrong at all." She composed herself as best as she could.

Yasunobu nodded his head. "Good..." He flipped through his binder attentively. "Ah, Miss Sakaki? Before I forget, would you come see me in my desk?"

At that moment, the hearts of almost every female in the room dropped to the ground. Was Miss Sakaki the standard by which they would have to be judged? Was Mr. Yasunobu won over by the most beautiful girl in the school? If this was the case, they'd already lost.

Kaorin's face went white with shock. It was the singular most dreadful thing to happen to her life since Kimura announced his liking for high-school girls. Now, someone else wants her. It was almost mortifying and it darkened her day.

He went back to his class, "And so, I'll be looking forward to spending the year with you. Remember, you've been in this high school longer than I've been teaching, and I'll be learning as I go..."

Tomo then raised her hand, "Question! Why'd you want to teach so much, anyway?"

Yasunobu was taken aback by it, "Hm... why indeed? Ah..."

"Well?" Tomo's eyes widened with anticipation.

For several seconds, he tried to find an answer for it. He finally said, "I... I guess I just don't know." He chuckled a bit.

Dumbfounded, she muttered, "What kind of answer is that?" It was a strange and rather unusual answer from him. That made everyone wonder.

"Wow..." Chiyo said, "that's a bit interesting."

"Well, at least it was honest," Yomi noted. Indeed it was and it was more welcome compared to Kimura's 'sincerity' for liking high school girls, which was all the more reassuring. But everyone barely noticed Tomo's question but they found his answer a bit comforting. Still, to many girls, it wasn't enough to comfort them of the shock that entered their ears earlier. Then the bell rang.

"Okay, class dismissed. Everyone on cleaning duty, please take out your assigned materials..." Everyone except the assigned cleaning detail slowly went out. Yomi, Sakaki, Kagura, Tomo, Chiyo and Osaka were arranging tables, dusting erasers, and sweeping floors. Yasinubo went to the bathroom. His request for Sakaki to stay still rang in their ears. Except, of course, Sakaki, who seemed unperturbed.

"Cleaning time, cleaning time," sang Chiyo cheerfully as swept the floor - and turned watchful at Osaka as she dusted the erasers out the window, fearing what things her friend might do. Meanwhile, the taller girls were talking about Yasinubo.

"Well, this is convenient," Tomo said dryly. "All of us, together, cleaning out the classroom. No one else, just our little group of friends." She looked around. "Am I the only person who thinks that's a li-"

"Can it, Tomo." Yomi snapped, jerking the broom in her hands along the ground and blowing her dust pile everywhere.

"Oh, what's your problem, anyway?" She began to push one of the desks to the side of the room.

"My problem's that Mr. Yasunobu is as blunt as certain other male teachers we know." Kagura interrupted, pushing one of the tables flush against the wall. "I mean, Sakaki, you were already the envy of the school before, but now? MAN, you're lucky."

"It's nothing like that." Sakaki replied quietly.

"Then what is it? Everyone saw through the 'see me after class' facade."

Sakaki looked down at her feet. "Except..."

"He's got it bad for you, Sakaki!"

"No he doesn't."

Tomo pushed further. "You know, I bet it's your..."

"Cut it out already!" Kagura stepped in on Sakaki's behalf. "It's obvious she doesn't feel comfortable about what you're saying! God, Tomo, you can be such a jerk sometimes."

"Oh really?" The wildcat continued to pursue her half-baked hunches, "Then tell me, why would he want her to stay?"

Chiyo, who overheard the conversation the entire time, couldn't help but intervene for her best friend. She walked up into the circle and said, "What are you guys talking about? Doesn't Miss Sakaki have a say in all of this?"

"You're right, Chiyo," Yomi agreed. She turned to Sakaki, "Sakaki, can you tell us why he called you to stay in after class?"

She lifted her a little and answered, "I need some help with my English lessons. I know he does Social Studies but he told me he can do some English lessons." Her answer to their question astounded everyone. "I never asked for any help from Miss Yukari because she might blurt out my grades in class."

"So you needed help, huh?" Yomi asked her again.

She nodded slowly, like she was ashamed of admitting it. But then she kept things close to herself.

"Or is it something more?" Tomo eyes went wide open, wanting to know more.

"How about you keep your mouth shut?" Yomi glared at her.

"Why is that? Maybe your disappointed that the new teacher didn't call you," The wildcat taunted.

"And why is that?" Yomi's nerves are now irritated.

"I don't know," she said leeringly, "... maybe because you're fat!" That was the straw that broke the camel's back.

"SHUT UP!" Yomi snapped, raising her hand to strike. It did - and it missed.

"Nya, nya!" Tomo made a stupid face. "Can't catch me, can't catch me!"

"I'll kill you!" Yomi chased Tomo all around the classroom, the wildcat laughing loudly while the meganeko bellowed in rage.

"This will only end one way." Kagura remarked dryly, "Yomi's faster."

"I wish Tomo wouldn't provoke her all the time, though." Chiyo said.

"Well, this time, she had it coming to her, but I'm more worried about the room we were just working on cleaning."

"With any luck, Mr. Yasunubo will understand this..."

One of the desks flew across the room, with Tomo and two chairs following shortly afterward, landing right at the feet of the uninvolved girls. Chiyo's eyes balled out of her head, Kagura put her hand over her mouth in shock. Sakaki silently left the room.

"Hehe... you're getting stronger every time..." Tomo groaned, her lips barely moving, slurring her speech.

"Never piss me off," Yomi warned, sending an angry glare at Tomo. That wasn't necessary. The wildcat lied still on the floor, not moving much. Yomi surveyed the room with distaste, "What a mess we made?" She then turned angrily at Tomo, "Thanks to you!" Everyone else sweatdropped at the room's messy state.

"Ah!" Chiyo shouted, "We have to clean this room before he comes back!" Everyone snapped back to work, frantically trying to clean premises before Yasinubo arrives. Except for Tomo, who was knocked out of commission. As insurance, Yomi and Kagura prudently tied up the wildcat with some rope from the closet so she wouldn't make another fuss when she wakes up. They hurriedly swept the floor, dusted the erasers, shuffled furniture, etc.

The door slid open and in came the smiling teacher, "Sorry to keep you waiting, I was talking to..." He stopped short of his sentence to see the classroom spic and span. Almost as if it was brand new.

"Wow, guys, you did a great job," he commended the girls, who were panting and sweating heavily, looking in stark contrast to the now pristine condition of the classroom. And he noticed Tomo wriggling in her binds. "Why is Miss Takino tied up like that?"

"Eh..." Yomi explained, "to make a long story short, we have to restrain her for now since she makes a mess every now and then."

"I see..." He sweat-dropped. "Considering from what I've heard about her, it seems.. okay. Just a little excessive though."

As Yomi untied her, Tomo complained, "Excessive? You're letting her off even if she tied me up like that?"

"I'll just tell her not to next time," he explained to her.

"Not good enough! Make her apologize to me-"

"That's enough, Tomo," Yomi grunted as she covered her mouth and dragged her out of the classroom. The wildcat kept mumbling and struggling, trying to escape her grip but to no avail. As it was finished, everyone else turned their eyes to Yasunubo.

"We apologize for that, Mr. Yasunubo," Chiyo explained to him. "That happens to them sometimes."

"That's okay," he assured happily. "there's been a lot of weird stuff for me today."

Everyone said their goodbyes and left home except for Sakaki.

"Miss Sakaki," Yasunubo said, "Let's go study some English lessons. I'll get some us some cake from the canteen on the way."

Sakaki smiled softly and answered, "Thank you, Mr. Yasunubo."

"That's the least I could do," he replied cheerily, "after all, getting along with the students is one thing a new teacher should do." Both of them walked quietly along the now silent hallways.

A/N: This is a fresh take in making a teacher's character in Azumanga Daioh. I hope you'll like it. Please R&R to your pleasure. For any horror fic fans out there, try Grimoire: The Lustbound Heart and For What It's Worth.
PS, thanks to some facts by Ryououki I've changed some details in in this chapter, especially with Yasunobu's name. From I was told the original name, Yasinubo doesn't seem like a Japanese name because in the simple Japanese alphabet (Hiragana) there is no "si" character. The set where "si" would be has "Shi" instead. Likewise there is are no "ti", "tu", or "hu" they are "chi", "tsu", and "fu" respectively. So, basically, when translated to English you will never find "si", "ti", "tu", or "hu".