"You left."

"I'm sorry, Lily, I-"

"No, no you're not sorry, and don't even try that on me. Don't act like you can just say sorry, patch up my heart with one word and expect everything to be perfect again."

Lily started to close the door of her flat that was situated just on the edge of the London city limits.

James shoved his Armani loafer in between the door and the frame just before she closed it. "Lily, listen to me."

"No, James, I won't listen to you." She glared down at his foot with disgust. "Get you thousand dollar shoe out of my doorframe before I break your foot."

"Lily, a wise woman once told me that when girls tell you to get the hell away, you try even harder to stay."

"Don't go throwing my own words back in my face." Lily pushed the door against his foot but got only a small wince out of him. "You won't get me to love you again and you sure as hell won't get into my pants again."

James sighed as Lily kicked his foot viciously out of the doorway, badly scuffing his new shoe. She slammed the door in his face, the peeling white paint only inches from hitting his nose. James turned around and sat on the short concrete step in front of the door, careful not to get any dirt on his jeans. They cost a lot more than his shoes did. He looked around the yard. The grass looked like it hadn't been cut for years. Garden tools lay abandoned in the small plots of dirt that made up a sad excuse for a garden. The paint on the whole front of the flat was peeling. When James got up, flakes from the door where he had been leaning back on it clung to his jacket.

He didn't know what else to do and he wasn't going to leave, so he went on a quest, searching for a lawn mower. He supposed he could just use magic, but he figured a mower would be less suspicious to the old man who sat in his front yard in a lawn chair. He was pointedly watching James, and he had a feeling the man had watched Lily slam the door in his face and was waiting eagerly for another showdown.

Lily clearly didn't have any sort of lawn mowing device, so he took off his jacket, laid it neatly on the front step and walked across the street to ask the neighbour if they could spare a mower.

James didn't see Lily at all as he mowed the lawn and generally cleaned up the yard. He wiped his hand across his forehead, making his hair stick straight up in the front, wishing he could have just used magic. It was a little too humid out to be mowing the lawn.

He returned the lawn mower to the neighbour with a thank you and an elaborate bow. The woman, maybe in her forties, giggled while her husband cast glares at James until he was well away from their house and back in Lily's front yard.

The sun was setting; it had taken a good three hours for James to make Lily's front lawn presentable without the use of magic. He was sure he didn't look half as put together as he had when he'd arrived.

He went back to the front door none the less. He picked up his jacket and knocked three times. Lily opened the door moments later, also looking much more dishevelled. She looked at James like she was about to cry.

"I can't do this now James. Please just leave." She leaned against the doorframe; light purple circles had formed under her eyes.

"I'm not leaving until you talk to me."

Lily groaned. "Why can't you just go?" She dropped her head to her chest and when she looked up, she saw her front yard. The grass, which had been nearly knee height, had been neatly trimmed, all the gardening tools had been put away and the garden beds had been turned. The dead flowers in the pots by her front door had been removed and replaced with, Lily assumed, a little magic. Now lilies grew in the pots, surrounded by cascades of pink hydrangeas.

She looked at James, narrowing her eyes. "Why?"

"Well I wasn't just going to sit on your front step for three hours. Thought I'd do something useful."

"Well that's a first," Lily muttered.

"Can I come in? Please? Just to talk. I won't try to convince you of anything or change your mind. I just want to talk to you."

Lily looked at him, a sudden spark of panic in her eyes. "Um, no. Couldn't we just…talk here? Or something?"

"What's wrong with inside?" James asked, frowning.

"It's…messy." Lily glanced back inside furtively.

"Do you not remember my dorm at Hogwarts? Come on, Lily, just let me in."

Lily opened her mouth, but the noise that came forth was definitely not from her. It was a baby, starting to cry with that hiccupping sob.

James' eyes widened. Lily closed her eyes, running her fingers through her tangled red hair.

"That's why," she said quietly.

"Lily," James breathed. "What…?"

"You might as well come in now. Just to talk though, no funny business."

James shook his head, still mesmerized by the baby's cry as it grew louder.

Lily led him to what passed as a family room, shutting the front door behind her. The flat was so much smaller than James was used to and just as messy as his dorm at Hogwarts had been. Toys and clothes were scattered everywhere. A pile of clean clothes took up half of a small old loveseat that had once been new leather but was so worn now that it looked more like rhinoceros skin.

James sat tentatively on the loveseat. There was no TV in the room. He waited awkwardly while Lily entered the kitchen to tend to the baby. He couldn't see into the kitchen, a doorframe without a door was the only open space.

Lily came back, a black-haired baby in her arms. His tiny hands were curled into fists, gripping the fabric of his blue footed pajamas and his eyes were closed. James assumed he had gone back to sleep.

James immediately jumped to his feet and offered Lily the spot on the loveseat while he sat in an old chair that probably used to belong with a dining room table. Lily sat wearily. James was unable to take his eyes off the baby.

Finally, he gathered the courage to ask the question that had been burning inside of him since the baby's first cry.

"Is it…?"

Lily nodded. "He's yours." Her eyes were so conflicted James couldn't figure out how she felt about it.

"What's his name?" James asked reverently.

"Harry," Lily said quietly, looking down at her son.

"Do you think…?" James started to ask, leaning forward slightly before leaning back and shaking his head. "Never mind."

"What?" Lily asked. "You want to hold him, don't you?"

James shrugged sheepishly, his hand flying to the back of his head, playing with his unruly black hair.

"You still do that? Shouldn't you have grown out of it?"

James forced himself to put his hand back in his lap.

"I'm being overly nice. I think I'm just overtired," Lily said as she got up, shaking her head. "Here," she said, carefully holding Harry out. "Be really careful; make sure you support his head and neck."

James took Harry, holding him like an ancient relic, like one wrong movement and he would just crumble to dust. He cradled Harry to his chest and he could feel the baby's tiny heart beating against his own. A quick, tiny drumbeat and a strong steady one.

Lilt had watched him warily for a moment, like he might just throw the baby across the room, but the expression of wonder on James' face convinced her that it was safe for her to sit down again.

"So if you're here to talk, let's talk," Lily said, her eyes hard.

James, unable to tear his eyes away from the baby, nodded dazedly. "Alright."

Lily shook her head. "Why did you leave?" she asked, her gaze on his face, gauging his expression.

James looked up at her. "I left…because I had to. I didn't want to, Merlin knows I didn't. And if I had known…" he trailed off, looking back down at the baby. "If I had known I had a son…"

"Why did you have to leave?" Lily scowled at him. "You aren't answering my question."

James squirmed in his seat and, almost as if he sensed his father's discomfort, Harry started to cry. James looked at Lily, a panicked expression on his face as she came over and took Harry back. He calmed down as she shushed him and rocked him back and forth in her arms. She cast a quick glare at James, reminding him of her question.

"Right," he muttered. "Well, I left because…because my parents told me to." His cheeks flushed red as Lily stared at him in astonishment.

"They…they were being influenced by You-Know-Who somehow or another and they told me that I couldn't be with a…Muggle-born."

"And you never thought to question this?" Lily asked, trying very hard to keep her voice down so Harry wouldn't start crying again.

"They're my parents…"

James, you're an adult! You don't have to listen to everything your parents say. If you had really, honestly loved me, you wouldn't have left, no matter what!"

"If I had known, Lily…" James said, looking helpless.

"Yeah, but you didn't! And that shouldn't have mattered! While you were off…globetrotting and buying fancy shoes with your family fortune, or whatever, I've been living here in this bloody horrible flat trying to take care of a child all by myself! A few more weeks and I was going to go home to my parents, even though when they found out I was pregnant and unmarried they all but told me I couldn't come back! You know how they are." Lily closed her eyes and a tear slipped down her cheek. She wiped it away furiously.

"Lily, I'll buy you anything you need! I'm so sorry I left!" James jumped to his feet, looking at her pleadingly. "I just want to help."

"You know your puppy dog eyes don't work on me," Lily said, but she sounded uncertain. "Alright, look. This is what's going to happen." She glanced at her watch. "You stay here tonight because it's late. You can sleep on the couch after you've folded all this laundry." Lily motioned to the pile beside her. "When Harry cries, you're going to get up and deal with him."

"What if he's hungry? I can't…"

"Deal with it," Lily said. "I haven't slept well since he was born."

James nodded, looking frightened.

A tiny smile crept across Lily's face. "You'll do fine," she said. "Now I'm going to put Harry to bed. You take a shower, you're a mess."

James got to his feet. "Where…?"

"Follow me," Lily said, looking a little exasperated.

Lily got up and led James down a cramped, dark hall to her room. She pointed inside. "The bathroom's to the left. There should be at least one clean towel in there. I'm going to move Harry's crib into the living room while you shower."

James nodded and entered the room behind Lily. She snapped on the overhead light and a dim glow filled the room. One of the light bulbs had clearly burnt out.

"You can change that light bulb too, when you get the chance. I think there are new ones in one of the cupboards in the kitchen."

The room was a lot neater than the rest of the house; Lily clearly still liked her sleeping space clean. That being said, there wasn't actually a lot of stuff in the room at all. A dresser, a bed, a bedside table with a lamp on it, the crib. A small bookcase with books spilling off the shelves. That was the only part of the room that James identified as being truly Lily. Otherwise the walls were bare and were painted a dull white color.

Lily lay Harry in his crib, then began to dig through the bottom drawer of her dresser. Eventually she pulled a white cotton t-shirt and a pair of red plaid pajama pants from the very bottom of the drawer. She handed them to James, not meeting his eyes.

"Those are yours," she muttered, a slight flush creeping over her cheeks. James only just noticed it in the dim light.

"You still have these?" James asked, taking the clothes with surprise.

"I used to sleep in them. When I had resigned myself to the thought that I would never see you again, I couldn't bring myself to throw them out. So they've been there for a while." Lily got to her feet, not looking at him. "I missed you," she said so quietly that James almost didn't hear her. "Now go shower." She pointed at the bathroom, glaring at him.

James nodded, backing toward the bathroom. He turned around and entered the cramped space, shutting the door behind him.

"And I missed you more than you could ever know," he whispered.

Thank you so very much for clicking on my story :) This started off as a drabble, then became a one-shot and now it's definitely a more-than-one-chapter story. I'm not really sure if this is AU or not. I don't think so, but I'm not sure. Anyway, please let me know what you thought! The next chapter will be posted soon! Oh, and if I made any mistakes, please let me know!

~TheSunlitEarth