Golfing in Gotham City: By Luna Mrow

Disclaimer: I don't own Young Justice, its characters, I only own this plot and the cookie I'm munchin' on. It's chocolate chip 8D

~X~X~X~

At the Gotham City Golfing Club, 10:03 A.M.

"Wow! So this is what an actual golf course looks like!" the ecstatic and optimistic voice of Miss Martian, aka Megan Morse, exclaimed excitedly. She jumped off the catwalk of her special bio-ship, feeling the rays of the sun greet her emerald skin. Her head turned around, where she saw her fellow teammates walking out normally. "Come on!" she urged impatiently.

"M'gann, remember we're not on Mount Justice. You'll need to change your skin color," Kaldur pointed out. Even off missions, Kaldur still looked out for his teammates like the natural leader he was.

"Oh, that's right, thank you Kaldur," Megan agreed. She closed her eyes, and in a matter of seconds used her powers to make her skin a light peach color.

"Looking good beautiful," a certain hormonal carrot topped boy commented. Wally put a hand on Megan's shoulder. "How about you and I take a ride in the golf cart together?"

Before Megan could politely decline Wally's offer, a mocking voice scoffed. "HA! You? Drive a golf cart? That's funny," snickered Artemis. The blond archer put her hands on her hips, eyeing Wally challengingly.

"What, think I can't do it? I bet I could drive circles around you Artie," Wally sneered. Artemis glared. She hated being called Artie.

Robin and Superboy climbed off the ship. "I was beginning to enjoy the aster of taking a day off, don't you two love birds go ruin it by flirting with each other," Robin commented.

"We're not flirting!" Wally and Artemis yelled at the same time.

"Robin is right, we should take advantage of the fact we got today as a day off," Kaldur smiled.

For the first time since they left Mount Justice, Superboy said something. "I still don't get why we're going golfing," the boy of steel commented.

"Don't worry Conner, it'll be fun!" Megan smiled assuredly. Conner didn't buy it. The six entered the golf course building. And so began the hectic day that was about to ensue…

~X~X~X~

"Here Conner, see if this golf club is big enough for you," Megan offered, handing Conner a silver club. He grabbed it, and the Martian studied him for a second. "That'll work." Because none of them brought their own gear, the six were in the rental section trying out clubs and renting balls. Megan seized the opportunity to help Conner.

"What's the point of golf anyway?" he asked her, his voice lacking enthusiasm.

"Oh, I'm glad you asked. We set the golf balls down on a tee, hit the golf ball, and hope it lands in a hole," Megan replied.

"Simple enough."

"It sounds simple, but it gets more complicated. You have to avoid sand holes, your golf ball going into the water, things like that." Megan smiled. Her eyes then something on a rack. "Hey Conner! You would look really good in a caddy hat!"

"A… what?"

In a brief moment Megan grabbed a hat and was back in front of Conner. She was holding a blue and red plaid caddy hat. "These are what golfers wear," she said matter-of-factly. "You should get one."

"Those look stupid," Conner dismissed. "No."

She sighed, and hoped he wouldn't reject every idea she had for the day. "Alright, whatever you say…"

Across the store…

"I swear to god, why did Artemis even have to come? Isn't golfing a man sport?" Wally asked Robin, while the two were getting golf balls. "She probably can't even hit a golf ball. In fact, she probably doesn't even know how to hold a club. And she certainly can't drive a golf cart!"

"Dude, shut up, you're making it hard for me to feel whelmed." Robin replied. He really didn't want to hear about Wally's hatred for Artemis. Partly because he knew Wally didn't hate her. He liked her. But, he was also bull headed.

Wally ignored the Boy Wonder's command. "I can drive a golf cart so much better than her."

"Oh, really?" asked a female's voice the speedster really didn't want to hear. He turned around and saw Artemis standing there, smirking challengingly. "I can drive around the whole golf course in a golf cart and still beat your sorry ass."

"Ha! Is that a challenge Artie? Because I'll take you up on that one." Wally crossed his arms.

"Good," she smiled. "First one around the course wins." Artemis smiled wider. "Oh, before I forget, you'll need these for the race." She handed Wally two golf balls. "Better bring your balls, because I don't play nice." She flipped her blond hair back and walked off.

"DUDE! HA HA HA! She totally owned you just now!" Robin laughed.

Wally rolled his eyes. "She's going down."

"You do know the point of going golfing was to golf, not to race around in golf carts like children, right?" Kaldur asked, obviously having heard the two's bet. Robin still couldn't control his laughter.

Forty minutes later, outside on the golf course

"Ready for your first swing at golf?" Megan happily asked Conner.

"Are you sure you wouldn't want to try?"

"Oh no, I'm not going to golf."

The boy of steel raised a brow suspiciously. "You're not?"

"Uh-uh."

"Why?"

She shrugged. "I have bad aim."

"That's not true, I've seen you hit things with great aim."

"Yes, but that's when I was using my powers. Without my telekinesis, I'm no good." Megan took out a club. "Okay, hold it like this," she said, positioning her hands on the club handle. Conner followed. "Great! Okay, now ease the club back, position the end to line up with the golf ball, and swing away!"

Conner swung, and hit the ball off the tee, however it only bounced off and rolled a few yards. "Damn it," he swore.

"No, no! That was a great first try."

"I didn't make the ball in the hole."

"Don't worry, you'll be hitting birdies in no time."

"Birdies?"

"Yup, and maybe you'll hit an eagle," Megan smiled. Conner nodded, but couldn't imagine why Megan was so happy about hurting innocent birds. It was out of character for her.

~X~X~X~

"Okay, first one around the entire golf course wins. No cheating and taking short cuts, and no going off course. Stay by the flags of the holes for guidelines. Understood?" asked the Boy Wonder, who had taken up the position for referee.

"Understood," Wally and Artemis confirmed. Although, they were both staring holes into the other menacingly.

"Please, if you two get kicked out, don't say we're with you two," Kaldur sighed disapprovingly. But what could the merman do? His teammates were bound and determined to act immature.

The two got into separate golf carts that were parked right next to each other. "I hope you stay on track," Wally sneered.

Artemis rolled her eyes. "Ha! You better hope you're as fast in a cart as you are on your feet, Flash Boy. Because I will destroy you."

"On your marks," Robin said, having taken off his jacket and holding it up as a flag. "Get set…" Wally glared at his opponent one more time, but his eyes grew wide when he realized how cute Artemis looked in the driver's seat of a gold cart. "GO!" Robin shouted. A loud SCREEEEECH sound was made, and Artemis shot off in front, leaving ruts in the grass! "Dude! go!" Robin cried.

"I can't!"

Kaldur rolled his eyes. "You've got to turn the keys in the ignition then hit the gas pedal."

"Right! Here I go!" Wally said, swerving out and following behind Artemis, who already had a good lead.

Robin and Kaldur were left standing there. The Boy Wonder smirked, "Da Nile isn't just a river for those two."

Kaldur looked at Robin confusingly. "Huh?"

"I mean, KF and Artemis have the hots for each other."

"Right. Come on, I at least want to get a few holes in before those two come back."

~X~X~X~

Wally grit down on his teeth, trying his absolute hardest to catch up to Artemis, who was five yards in front and keeping a solid pace. She looked in her rear view mirror, and saw his face of aggravation. Laughing, she stuck up a hand and waved tauntingly. Wally growled, hitting the gas as hard as he could. She was too fast. However, he saw an opportunity to bypass her when they were going around their first turn. Quickly turning the wheel, he went to the inside of the course, turning fiercely around! By doing this, he cut her off, sending her in second place.

Now it was his turn to taunt. "Having fun, Artie?" he asked while smiling.

She scowled. "You'll regret that!" Artemis gripped the steering wheel harder, swerving to the outside. She hit the gas full force, but still couldn't go to full speed as Wally. Artemis never told Wally she was a sore loser.

No big deal, he was about to find out.

The hard way.

BAM!

Artemis hit the bumper on Wally's golf cart, ramming into the end full force! Wally was thrown forward, but remained in his seat. With wide eyes, he turned around, and saw the fiery fury of Artemis. "So that's how it's played, is it?" he asked.

She smirked. "Street rules Flash Boy, street rules." She rammed his cart yet again.

"Fine!" he exclaimed. "You wanna like that, BRING IT!"

And so began the ramming war between Kid Flash and Artemis. He eventually went up to her speed and rammed her, almost sending her off track. She rammed her golf cart into his, almost sending him in a pond. It didn't even matter that the golf carts were rentals and they'd have to pay for the damage they inflicted; this was WAR! Soon, they were halfway through the track, and Artemis had nearly slammed Wally into a sand hole. The speedster gritted his teeth. She was a better slammer than him. He needed to get her off track once and for all. So, hitting the gas pedal as hard as he possibly could, Wally zoomed in on Artemis. She scowled at him, keeping her speed the same as well. Quickly he bumped her golf cart, but instead of bumping it once and then going back, he kept pressing against her cart, refusing to get off.

"Lay off!" Artemis hissed, not expecting this. He further rammed her golf cart, and soon she began to lose control of it.

"See you at the finish line Artie!" he winked, and then rammed her one more time.

Fatality.

Artemis's cart went off the side, going into a sand hole, fortunately the archer was unharmed. "WALLY!" she screamed. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

He laughed, and she watched him drive off. However Artemis wasn't going to give up. Now, she was determined to destroy him.

Running quickly to a crowd of female golfers, Artemis skidded to a stop panting. There were nine or ten golfers who were doing free swings. "LADIES! HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CHEATED OR HURT BY A MAN?" Artemis asked or screamed rather.

"YEAH!" the women cheered.

Smiling, Artemis pointed to Wally's golf cart, driving along the course. "THEN ASSERT YOUR POWER! TAKE OUT THAT MAN!"

"YEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!" the women golfers cheered. (A/N … uh… hell hath no fury like the fury of a scorned woman? xD)

~X~X~X~

Robin had just scored his first birdie, and was aiming for his second one right when Wally drove past him. "Dude get in, I'm winning!" Wally exclaimed. The Boy Wonder shrugged, figuring nothing life threatening would happen if he got in the golf cart with Kid Flash; how wrong the Boy Wonder was; how very, very wrong indeed.

"Dude, no offence, but I thought Artemis would've killed you by now. How are you winning?" Robin asked, once he sat down in the cart.

Wally shrugged. "I used my cunning skills."

"… you cheated didn't you?"

"WHAT? Me? Cheat? Nah. I just you know rammed her golf cart off the track."

"You what?"

"She started it!" Wally exclaimed. "Plus, what she going to do?"

That was when the trouble started.

Golf balls, hundreds of them, pounded upon the roof of the golf cart! "What's happening?" Robin asked. "We're being attacked!" The two boy's eyes shifted up and saw Artemis and ten other angry looking woman swinging away like crazy, hitting golf balls at them as they drove across the course. The more seconds ticked by, the harder the golf balls hit! "You just had to knock her off the track? YOU MORON!" Robin yelled.

Wally didn't reply, he was too busy trying to avoid the golf balls from the enraged golfers. But there were too many of them, and soon he lost control of the wheel. He began to swerve! And then he saw a figure coming towards them- Artemis! "OH MY GOD SHE'S COMING TO KILL US!" Wally shrieked.

"Us? Man, I'm out of here!" Robin exclaimed. The Boy Wonder jumped out of the moving cart, rolling down the green hill. Robin swore that would be the last time he'd ever get in a golf cart with Kid Flash. Ever.

~X~X~X~

Artemis kept running towards Wally and his cart, as he struggled to gain control of it. Golf balls were still raining upon him, and by now the roof had a million dents in it. Wally was confident he'd win, the finish line was only a few yards away. Only a few yards away! He could make it, he could make it!

With an amazing leap, Artemis jumped out at Wally, spearing him, and the two fell out from the passenger's side, rolling on the grass. With no one controlling the golf cart, the cart swerved into a forest of trees and then exploded. Yes, exploded. But did the two care? Of course not. They had a race to win!

"You're such a loser!" Artemis yelled, when she got up off Wally and started running to the finish line on her feet. Wally raced after her, but due to exhaustion and the fact he was in public he didn't use his super speed. He leaped out at Artemis, dragging her to the ground, stopping her from crossing the finish line. "No!" she exclaimed.

"I'm… gonna… win!" he grunted. The two started wrestling on the ground, while trying to crawl to the finish line. It was then Kaldur decided to step in.

"Would you two stop it?" he asked. "You both win."

"WHAT?" the archer and the speedster exclaimed at the same time. "It's a draw?"

"Yes, now let's get out of here before the employees find out you exploded their golf cart!" Kaldur said, raising his voice. He really had no idea how the two managed to explode a golf cart. He really didn't want to know.

~X~X~X~

The six were riding home in Megan's bio ship. "Did you like golfing Conner?" Megan asked hopefully.

He shrugged. "It was alright." She sighed, having had no luck to get Conner to show enthusiasm the whole day. However, her eyes caught a glimpse of something hidden underneath Superboy's jacket. A material that was red, blue and plaid stuck out. She smiled. He bought the caddy hat.

Wally and Artemis had to be separated, and were on two opposite sides of the bio-ship. Kaldur had just finished his lecture of 'why you shouldn't race around in rental golf carts and blow them up' and now Robin was talking about the suffix of 'disaster' yet again. When the ship landed on Mount Justice, Megan, Superboy, Robin, and Aqualad exited the ship, but Kid Flash and Artemis stayed aboard. They glared daggers into each other.

"I would've won if you weren't such an idiot," Artemis said once the two were alone.

Wally rolled his eyes. "Whatever Artie." He smirked. "But that was fun."

She hesitated, but smiled as well. "Yeah, that was fun," she agreed.

The two realized they were alone (or so they thought) and out of pure 'spur of the moment' Wally leaned in, and kissed Artemis full on the lips. She was surprised, but she figured what the hell, and kissed him back. A few moments passed, and the two had arms wrapped around the other.

Then…

"I FREAKING KNEW IT!" came a voice. The two broke off their kiss to find Robin, holding a camera.

"ROBIN!" they both screamed.

Robin laughed, and then shot off, running away. With one more glance at Artemis, Wally dashed off after him and the camera.

Author's Note:

Yeah, that was a pretty crazy ass fic. I know, I know. Hopefully it was funny as well! :D Please review, and thank you for reading!