Jezebel POV

I was not happy. I was nowhere near happy when Jacob walked in with Bella. I was pissed; no beyond pissed. So as a result of me being pissed I basically lost control.

The next thing I knew, Bella was thrown across the room in my fit of rage. I threw her into the wall over and over again until she was crying out in pain, in mercy, for me to stop. I just kept on glaring at her from my spot by Aaron and used my powers over and over again on her.

Seeing Bella in pain made me happy. It made me complete. It was like her being in pain soothed me somehow; it was like by her hurting, I gained happiness. I liked to feel happiness; I didn't want it to stop because she was now near death. No. I lived for other people's pain. It was almost as if something inside of me was making me feel like this, all of my humane feelings gone and replaced.

Replaced with hate.

I had so much hatred for this one girl. She has ruined my life so far. She has pushed me over my limit, she made my temper spiral out of control and that is why I was acting like this towards her. I couldn't let my hatred for her take over my life though. I needed to get over this hatred, I needed to move on with my life and not embrace in the past when I could look towards the future and do so much more.

I could feel tears streaming down my face. I never cry. Bella Swan brought out so many emotions within me; she changed me into who I was now. She made me a monster; a monster who feeds off of people's pain. I wanted to change this though. I needed to change myself once more.

With one last glare I set Bella down on the floor where she slumped forward in a pile of limbs. My hatred for Bella Swan was now no more, but it didn't mean that this hate would not build up again over time. In a few days time I would probably hate her as much as I did now. The only positive this in this situation was that I let all of my pent up anger out on her, the source. I felt better now, I felt as if I was cleansed.

I turned to my right and saw that Aaron was looking on at me in shock, as was everyone else. I had forgotten that Aaron knew nothing about the supernatural. It's not my duty to tell him though, its Corey's. So I wasn't at all surprised when Corey gently pulled Aaron out of the house and into the front yard. I could hear their mumbled conversation, but I paid no attention to it.

I silently walked up to Bella and crouched down to her level. I was apologetic. I actually felt bad that I had hurt this girl. I did not feel a lot of guilt though. I didn't really have a reason for throwing her up against the wall; all she did was show up with Jacob. I was the one who had brutally thrown her up against the wall without a warning at all. I should apologize, but it didn't mean that I was going to.

I then whispered to Bella, "My anger and hatred towards you is no longer there at the moment, so please feel lucky that I was feeling some remorse and let you down."

I then walked out through the back door.

I was lying in my bed just staring up at the ceiling. On the ceiling of my room were a bunch of stars that I had collected and taped up there over the years. I was trying to count them all but I kept on getting confused after fifty or so.

I could hear the mumbled noises of a song that I knew coming from my beat up old radio that sat in my room which was a gift from my late grandfather. The song was soothing and calm. The emotions from the song just molded me into feeling the same way. It was almost as if I could feel what the writers and singers of the song must have been feeling when they were going over this.

What were their motivations? Why did the feel this way? Did someone affect them so much that they just poured out all of their emotions into this one song?

I was so confused at life right now. I had no idea how to fix my life, and I had no idea how it could somehow get better over time. At this moment, I felt as if nothing could change my feelings about people and things. My emotions were running wild as I started to think about it, the calmness had soon worn off and I was a wreck of emotions. I didn't know what to feel, what to say, how to act. How was I to get through this?

"Lord help me." I whispered.

I was startled when I knock was placed upon my closed door.

"Come in." I mumbled into my pillow as I placed it over my face.

"I just wanted to know if you were coming down for dinner, its pizza night." My brother said.

"I'll be down in a minute." I replied.

"Look, I know that you must be feeling conflicted about a lot of things right now, but you just need to get over the past and look towards the future. Don't let the past disrupt what will happen in the future. You need to forget and move on." Paul told me.

"Wow, who knew Paul Lahote was smart and gave good advice?" I joked.

"Ha, ha, very funny, I'm serious though. Just please move on with your life. You were placed on this Earth for a reason, you need to live life to its fullest and create new memories with the people whom you love and care about, for they surely feel the same. You never know how much longer you will last on this Earth." He said.

I smiled. "Thanks for the talk Paul. You really helped me see things in a different perspective."

"Glad I could be of service." He said whilst winking.

"Look Paul, I know I may not tell you this a lot, but I love you and always will. You bring out the good in me and help me grow into a better person every day. I wish to create new memories with you and the guys and look back on old ones and not feel regret. So thank you for everything Paul." I told him sincerely.

"I love you too Jez, you'll always be my baby sister." He said. "So are you coming down for pizza or what?"

I smiled.

"Sure."

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!

Look I'm sorry for lack of updates, and I know this is short, but I really didn't know what to write at all. So I tried my hardest to give you an update.

Look I tried to update allof my stories, but when I was going to write my Embry/OC story, my laptop crashed. I uploaded the chapters I wrote for all my other stories on my other computer that doesn't have Microsoft Word. I'm really sorry about that. Please read it and review it please, for my birthday!

Can you give me 4 reviews at least on this?

~REVIEW FOR CUPCAKES~