XXXIII. Pocahontas, November 6

Pocahontas stared at her cell phone in her hand, still shaking. She let the phone drop onto the bed and then let whole body go limp and fall onto the bed. She had finally gotten up the courage to call Nakoma, and it had gone well, but she was still nervous and not sure where their relationship stood. She would hopefully find out tonight. Pocahontas had invited Nakoma to meet up with her at Panchito's, the diner in Buena Vista. It seemed less likely that they would run into anyone that they knew there, and this was a meeting that demanded privacy.

She finally forced herself to get up off the bed and start to get ready. She was already dressed from school earlier, wearing some plain faded jeans and an oversized tan t-shirt with a scooped neckline. Her long, straight black hair wasn't difficult to straighten out and she smoothed the wrinkles from her shirt easily. She brushed her teeth and ran a comb through her hair, then looked at her reflection with a shrug. She felt like tonight was special. She wasn't normally too concerned with her appearance, but for this important reunion she needed to do a little something extra.

She scoped out her room, looking for inspiration. Then she saw the jewelry box on her dresser—covered with dust, barely touched. She walked to the dresser and put her hand on it. It had been her mother's—her father had given it to her on a birthday years ago. It was loaded with sentimental value, of course, but Pocahontas had never been one to wear jewelry much. She opened the box, sending dust into the air. The first piece she saw was a necklace with a turquoise teardrop-shaped pendant hanging from it. Perfect. Pocahontas put it on and took one last look in the mirror before heading out.

Panchito's had a big red neon sign and large windows wrapped all the way around the building, making its glow visible from a ways down the road in the dusk. Their menu consisted mainly of Mexican food, along with typical diner fare like greasy burgers and onion rings. As Pocahontas pulled into a space by the entrance, she could see through the windows that only a couple of booths were filled at the moment and the wait staff was mostly chatting in lazy clumps. Perfect. She couldn't see Nakoma in the waiting area by the door, nor was she sitting at any of the booths. Pocahontas felt an irrational surge of worry that she had been stood up. She shook it off and took out her phone. No messages. Nakoma probably just hadn't arrived yet. She folded her hands on her lap and waited. Three minutes passed before another car pulled into the lot and Nakoma stepped out of it. Though she'd had no real reason to believe Nakoma wouldn't arrive, Pocahontas still felt a wave of relief as her paranoia was washed away.

"Hey," Pocahontas said, pushing her hair back behind her ear as she stepped out of her car and feeling a bit timid for once in her life.

Nakoma didn't say anything at first, just pulled Pocahontas into a tight embrace. Pocahontas was surprised at the immediate affection, but quickly wrapped her arms around her friend and buried her face in her shoulder.

"I missed you so much," Nakoma said, and then shivered.

"Let's head inside," Pocahontas said, putting an arm around Nakoma to keep her warm.

A sign standing in front of the host's podium when they walked in read "Please seat yourself!" so the two headed to a booth by the window and sat down across from each other. Each grabbed a menu from the end of the table and looked them over, not saying a word to each other. A busser came by and filled glasses with ice water for them. Pocahontas scanned the menu quickly before deciding what she wanted, setting the menu down on the table in front of her. Nakoma continued to study the menu, chewing on the tip of her thumb. Pocahontas couldn't help staring across the table at her, so happy to finally be back in her presence. Her stomach fluttered with excitement and uncertainty. As Nakoma finally set down her menu, their server slid smoothly up to their table.

"Goooood evening, ladies," the server said , and Nakoma looked up at him. "My name is—"

He suddenly sputtered midsentence, and began coughing. Pocahontas, sipping on her water, looked up now, concerned for this stranger's wellbeing but also annoyed that he was taking up her one-on-one time with Nakoma. She choked a little on her water when she saw his face.

"Naveen!" Nakoma said, surprised. "What are you—I didn't know you worked here!"

"Yes, I—I do," Naveen said, trying to regain his composure. "I—"

The girls were reasonably surprised to see Naveen taking part in such menial labor. Naveen came from what was well known to be an extremely wealthy family and should have no reason to have a job, especially not something so seemingly beneath him as working as a server in a relatively dingy diner. So much for not running in to other students here.

"I… I thought it would be nice to have some… some extra cash, so I…" Naveen was floundering, and very obviously. Nakoma raised an eyebrow at him, and he deflated before their eyes, then crouched down next to the table so that he wasn't looking down at them. "Please, please don't tell anyone that you saw me working here. It would be… humiliating, I'm sure."

"Our lips are sealed," Pocahontas said, gesturing as though she were zipping her lips shut. "You don't have to worry about us. It'll be like this never happened."

Naveen looked unsure, but it was obviously the best he could hope for. And of course Pocahontas was serious. This meeting with Nakoma needed to be a private one, anyway, and this way they could be sure that Naveen wouldn't tell anyone about seeing them together. Of course, there was nothing suspicious about two best friends going to a diner together, but if any of their conversation was overheard… Pocahontas shook her head. Even if Naveen did hear anything, he couldn't reveal the information convincingly to anyone without explaining how he overheard it. And it was a sure thing that he would never do that. He was someone who cared deeply about his reputation, and this did not fit in with the image he had thus far presented for himself.

"Thank you," Naveen said. "Now, um… Shall we start with just drinks? Or do you know what you'd like to eat already?"

"I think we've both decided," Pocahontas said, looking to Nakoma, who nodded.

The two ordered quickly and Naveen thanked them again and scurried toward the kitchen. The girls watched him hurry away, and once he was out of sight Nakoma leaned in to the table.

"What's that about?" she whispered, eyes wide with curiosity.

"I can't even guess," Pocahontas shook her head. "We should keep his secret, though. He deserves his privacy as much as we do."

"Of course," Nakoma said, leaning back. "I can't help being curious, though."

"And I don't blame you for that," Pocahontas smiled. "Your curiosity is one of the things I admire most about you."

The word she chose was "admire" but it was obvious from her tone of voice that "adore" might have been a better choice of words. Nakoma looked down at her hands under the table with a wistful smile. There was a slight tugging feeling in Pocahontas's chest that made her inhale sharply but silently. There was a pause, a slightly awkward stillness settling over the table. Pocahontas shifted in her seat, wanting to do or say anything to ease the discomfort.

"So, what did you wind up dong for Ha—" Pocahontas began, but was cut off before she could finish her sentence.

"I slept with Kocoum," Nakoma said suddenly, without looking up from her hands.

Pocahontas felt her mouth fall open a little bit in surprise, but quickly closed it back up. She swallowed, that tugging feeling in her chest turning quickly to a sharp pain. Her stomach churned. Pocahontas had no idea what to say.

"I—" she began. "On… on Halloween…?"

"No," Nakoma said quickly. "No, it was… About a month ago, I think."

"I thought…" Pocahontas swallowed, feeling like something was lodged in her throat. "Didn't you say… It just seemed like you didn't want to? Like he was trying to manipulate you… so you would feel obligated to have sex with him?"

The busboy approached the table again, and Nakoma sat up straight, smiling politely as he set the coffee Nakoma had ordered in front of her. She thanked him and waited for him to be out of earshot to answer her friend's question.

"I did feel that way," Nakoma said. "That's why I tried to ask you… Well, never mind that. It doesn't matter. The fact is, I decided to do it, and it was my decision and now it's done and I can't take it back. But when it happened, it was my decision. Even if now I…"

"Oh no," Pocahontas said, her face falling as she looked across the table at Nakoma, who looked unsure of everything she was saying—the picture of confusion.

"What?"

"This is my fault," Pocahontas said. "You made this decision because of me… Because of how I treated you the last time we spoke. I was awful. I should have been there for you. I'm so sorry."

"No!" Nakoma said. "No, I—this is not your fault. Please don't ever think that."

"But you made the decision after talking to me," Pocahontas said. "After I wouldn't listen to your dilemma. Wouldn't give you any advice. I was horrible and I only thought of myself. I never should have done that and I never want to be like that."

"It wasn't…"

"Tell me the way I treated you didn't influence your decision," Pocahontas said. "And don't lie. You know I can always tell."

Nakoma was silent, looking across the table sadly.

"I'm so sorry, Nakoma," Pocahontas said, reaching over and putting her hand over Nakoma's, resting on the table, for a few brief moments. "I'll never do that to you again. I promise."

"I don't want you to feel bad about this," Nakoma said, her voice sad. "I'm just so happy to be here with you again. You shouldn't worry about it because it really was my decision. And if anyone but me is ultimately to blame, it's Kocoum. I still feel he was a bit manipulative about it… I was thinking about that, too, when I made my decision. How he did all those things for me… I felt he deserved to get what he wanted in return but… that's not right… or is it?"

"No, it's not right," Pocahontas shook her head. "You should have as much of a say in the decision as he does. You should only do something if you both wanted it. Was it just one time?"

"Twice now," Nakoma grimaced. "It was… okay, I guess, but… he didn't seem to concerned about what I wanted, to be honest. I think he enjoys it a bit… a lot more than I do."

"You shouldn't have to go through that."

"I know, but…" Nakoma sighed, resting her chin on her hand and looking out the window. "I feel like now that it's happened… it has to keep happening. I can't say no."

"You could break up with him," Pocahontas said, then hesitated. "I mean… I shouldn't say that. It's self-serving. Of course I would be happy if you two broke up, but it should be about what you want… What… do you want?"

"I wish I knew," Nakoma gave Pocahontas a sad half-smile. "But I'm so glad you're here again to help me figure things out. I can't talk to anyone the way I talk to you."

The two girls smiled at each other for a minute. Pocahontas couldn't find any words that would properly convey the way she felt at that moment. Naveen finally came, carrying their meals and set them down one the table.

"Can I get you lovely ladies anything else?" Naveen asked.

"No, thank you," Pocahontas replied. "This will be all for tonight."

"Well then, here is your check," Naveen said, setting the receipt down on the table. "You may pay at the counter whenever you're ready. But take your time, of course—all the others waiting for tables are not so important anyway."

He gestured around at the nearly-empty restaurant with a wink, then bounded away. Clearly he had recovered from the shock of seeing such familiar customers.

"I really don't know what to do about the whole Kocoum situation," Nakoma shrugged. "I mean, I like him… He certainly has good qualities about him, but I don't love him. I'm far from that. I'm attracted to him, and he can be sweet sometimes, but... that's all there is to it."

"I don't want to try to influence your decision any more than I already have," Pocahontas said. "I feel like that's just not fair, given my… bias. It's your decision, but I'll always be here to listen quietly to anything you want to say about it. And whatever you decide, I'll be here for you, as a friend or… whatever."

"Thanks," Nakoma said, laughing a little, genuinely.

Then the conversation moved on and they chatted happily about anything and everything, just like things had been before the confession. They talked about all the TV that they had missed out on live-texting through during the last month and a half. Pocahontas excitedly told Nakoma about a global warming awareness event happening at LCU the next month that she planning to attend, and invited Nakoma to come along. Nakoma happily agreed. Pocahontas felt a lightness in her chest as time wore on and her heart fluttered against her chest when Nakoma laughed.

An hour after their food had come, they finally stood, leaving a sizable tip for Naveen on the table and heading to the counter, where Pocahontas insisted upon paying. Nakoma protested, but Pocahontas insisted it was to make up for all that Nakoma had to go through alone in the time since Homecoming. Nakoma agreed on the condition that she would pick up the next check. The pair headed outside into the brisk November air and stood between their cars talking for a minute.

"We should really head home," Pocahontas said. "But… It's been so long, I just don't want to leave."

"We'll see each other again soon," Nakoma assured her, then threw herself at her friend, squeezing her into another tight hug. "I just love you so much. I'm so glad everything's good again."

"I love you too," Pocahontas hugged back, closing her eyes and inhaling deeply.

"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" Nakoma said, pulling away and opening her car door.

"And the day after that," Pocahontas smiled.

"And the day after that one, too," Nakoma smiled radiantly and sat down in the car.

Pocahontas got into her car, feeling like her heart was going to sprout wings and soar out of her chest. It was a strange feeling of elation and she was surprised to be feeling it when all that had happened was renewing her friendship with Nakoma. But, she realized, their friendship meant that much to her… She may still be in love with Nakoma, but being just friends was good enough. She couldn't imagine spending the rest of her life without Nakoma in it. Nakoma pulled out of her parking space first, giving a friendly beep-beep before she drove away.

Pocahontas smiled to herself. Everything was going to be okay after all.

Author's Note: Sorry that this chapter took a long time and that my writing style has suffered considerably. I'm sort of out of practice right now, so sorry if it sounds a little stilted. I haven't written much at all in the past year and a half. I just wanted to quickly address something that was said in a couple of reviews (presumably from the same anonymous person) that this story received in my absence. Someone pointed out that my description of Belle's prince was "wrong" based on how he was portrayed in the movie. I was even told that I need to re-watch the movie, which is in my top favorite Disney films and which I watch multiple times a year and have probably seen more than any other movie.

Well, erm, all I can really say about that is—please remember that these characters are in high school. They are my interpretations of characters from the movies, but in most cases their ages do not match up with their film counterparts. Would Belle's prince have been a scrawny musician in high school? Probably not, but perhaps! The point is, we have no way of knowing how these characters would have looked or behaved in high school, which is what makes writing about it (and hopefully reading about it, in its various fanfiction interpretations) so much fun! So please take any perceived "mistakes" you see lightly and consider that this may just be me taking creative license. In fact, just assume that that's what's going on, because I am intimately familiar with the source material for these characters that I have chosen to feature. I'm surrounded by them every day!

Anyway, I hope there's still an audience for this… I know it's been a long, long time since I've updated. I feel bad about that, but I don't know when the next time I'll be able to update is either. Writing is one of the things I enjoy most in this world, but it's just so time consuming for me to write anything that I'm willing to share! I love reading the reviews from all those of you who enjoy this silly thing—it truly warms my heart. So if you're still out there and want to encourage me to keep this up after all these years, please consider writing a couple words to brighten my day. Even truly constructive criticism is often a pleasure to read, because it means someone cares enough about this story to want to help improve it. Happy holidays to you all and best wishes to you and your family and friends!