Title: if i could write out my own dreams

Disclaimer: I own Kybele.

Rating: PG

A/N: I know I'm going to get shit for pairing Barca with a girl so this is my explanation. Gladiators often had relations with each other, they had ample opportunity and easy access to men. But I think, everyone has the capability to love either sex.

Barca smiles as Pietros falls asleep beside him. He brushes the tendrils of hair from the boy's eyes and kisses his temple softly, so as not to wake him. Gingerly, if The Beast Of Carthage can even be so, he rearranges the threadbare blankets around his lover. He knows he should count himself lucky to have found love again. Twice in one lifetime is...a blessing as much as it is a curse. He holds Pietros close and knows the Gods have blessed him.

...but the appearance of the Thracian mutt has him recalling another Thracian he knew so long ago.

Her green eyes and charming laugh grace the halls of the ludus once more and Barca finds himself comforted instead of haunted. The reappearance of Kybele is amiable. He hears her smile in the silence of night and her approval of Pietros in the tranquil (if seldom) moments they get to spend together. She would have liked him. Barca is certain she would have liked his easy smile and the way he doesn't approve of his raucous mistreatment of the new recruits. It's what Barca loves about him. When they talk about getting free and taking all his birds with them, it makes Barca think about the future. Just as he is when Pietros nuzzles him in his sleepy state. In that moment Kybele's laughter is tangible. Barca knows, deep in his mind, that when he finally exits this world and walks the fields of Elysium he'll be hand in hand with them both. With that comforting certainty he lets Pietros's breathing and Kybele's memory to lull him to sleep once more.