The first voice I heard as I woke up was her crying voice.
I tried to move my body, but it has gone limp.
Strangely, I don't felt death closing to me . . . I felt numb, my entire body was as if turned into stone. No parts of my body that I could lift.
As I opened my eyes, I saw her face. The tears which fell, landed coldly on my face. It ache my heart to saw her like this. Am I that precious to you?
Then why did you fear me?
I felt my consciousness slowly drifting further, I tried to stay awake, but it kept getting weaker each seconds,
I saw the car who nearly hit me stopped in the middle of the road,
I saw people gathering around me with worried looks,
I saw ambulance coming closer,
But …
The last thing I saw was a grey haired person slowly walked away from the scene, his hand gripped on his shoulder, and his leg was slightly bended in a wrong direction . . .
. . .
. . .
. . .
Kaito fell on his knee with the grey haired boy facing him without his hood on. The cold gaze directed at the blue haired boy mercilessly. His entire body was trembling with fear as he recalled his lost memory.
It was like a time walk, he could felt his entire soul went back to past with unmeasurable speed, and when it's over, he was thrown back to present.
His house where Miku was sleeping, and the guest which triggered his memory to return.
The Grey Haired boy,
The sudden headache overcome him as another memory rushed back inside his head, he hissed with pain while clutching his head with both of his hands. The cold eyes never leave him though, even though he didn't looked into it anymore, he could still felt the cold feeling breathed into each corner of his bones.
He did not dare to look up,
If he look up-
"Have a nice day"
Eh?
The memory stopped, when he looked up again, he could saw his back facing him, walked away from him.
"Wait!" Kaito yelled
The boy stopped on his track, The ache does not left his head entirely, but he know there was one thing he wanted to make sure from his memory. Actually there were many questions, but in the end he choose the closest one from his recent memory.
"Len . . . it was you who saved both of us from that car accident . . . right?"
The Grey haired boy flinched, reacting to his questions . . .
. . .
. . .
. . .
Kaito could remember the flash of moment when Miku tried pushed him away before the car could hit him. But in split of moment, Len moved to shield both of them from the car impact. Kaito was thrown to the road side, while Miku received a minor bruise after her body thrown a few meters from location. But Len must pay the consequence. In that flash of moments, the memory played in slow motion, Len was thrown out by the impact of the car which cause him to hit the traffic light pole harshly.
His leg received the hardest impact as it hit the car and his shoulder hit the pole strongly. But the most terrifying scene played was when no one even bother to help him, instead they gathered around the blue haired boy who was lying unconsciously.
The scene replayed further, Miku approached Len but the Boy ushered her to tend the person who was supposed to be victim. Her stubbornness finally broke when Len whispered something to her. As Miku walked away, the Grey haired boy was struggling to get up yet no one even bat an eye at his condition.
The savior of the two souls walked away from the scene without looking back,
. . .
. . .
. . .
"Why? Why No one helped you that time?"
Surge of rage was flowing through Len's veins as he answered the questions instantly inside his head. The roots of the answer backtrack through utter humiliation he felt, at the same time also hatred for himself to allow his own life chose a dread path. The clock was unforgiving, he could only blame himself for the tragedy which happened until this day. And the inconsistency inside him.
Because I am a resident of Clockwork Alley
It was an answer he supposed to tell him, but instead of answering, he walked out of the house without looking back. Just like that day when the car accident happened.
. . .
. . .
. . .
Whoever walked on the Earth, whoever lived in it, it doesn't change the calm radiating from the never waning Moon when shroud of night blanketed the sky. The countless birth or death never hinder its job to shine brighter.
Dell could not count how many times the moon have watched over him. When the tragedy occurs, when he was disowned or even when his first tear dropped from his eyes. They never spoke, only enjoying each other presence in silence, yet when they depart it felt like they were having the best conversation.
At least that's what Dell thought . . .
He never know what The Moon was thinking . . .
Another night under the never waning moon, The Grey Haired companion walked along the sidewalk with the Midnight Club as his destination. Empty spot greeted him on the location where it was supposed to exist. His gaze unwaveringly stared at it with grief. The place which was once called Paradise has cease to exist, wiped by stream of time. Only left to exist as physical memory inside people.
He stood for a while, staring at the empty spot without intention to move soon. Piece of memories reminded him for the happy moment which once existed. He could remember it clearly, the happy moment which he cherished even after he lost trust to humanity.
In this place, he could remember seeing Kaito's true laugh . . .
Rin's genuine smile . . .
Miku's first tear of happiness . . .
Rei's cheerful expressions . . .
And . . .
Gumi's first joy . . .
He could not tell whether the return of his memories was a good news or a bad news. It might be neither or could be either. He truly doesn't know. It was supposed to be easier for him to know what he should do when piece of recollections fitted together.
But he felt empty . . .
Like a doll walking aimlessly, a doll without objective in his life.
He watched as the calm light shone above him. The one who never converse with him yet knew him very well. Just like a gem among the blackness, beautifully illuminate inside the pitch black darkness. The Only White among darkness.
The roof where the light shone onto show two people dancing under the watching eyes of the moon. A slow paced waltz with the girl's hand on the boy shoulder and his hand on her waist. Eyes watching each other in daze. The moon who watched over them slowly descended, the one who never have interest with human was drawn towards the passion radiating from both human. Perhaps if it once was a human, it will smile at the scenery in front of him. Just like how Dell smiled at the moment.
The boy spun her and the girl smiled full of joy yet the boy expression remained void. For Dell though, a slight twitch on the boy lips indicate he was smiling inside his heart. He knew it very well because he was that boy. In past.
Illuminated figure faded slowly, reminding him it was no longer the past he could stay. It was nice to visit the past, but time told him it was not a place for him to stay.
One tear fell from his eyes . . .
Just how much that scenery ached his heart, even the moon knew it very well.
A handkerchief was offered in front of him in the middle of his reminiscence, he turned his head at the owner of the hand.
"When you are alone, two glass of hot milk under the moon will soothe the pain" the black haired boy smiled
. . .
. . .
. . .
"Are you okay now?" ask the black haired boy
Two boys were basking under the illuminance of the moon, sipping hot chocolate milk in the middle of the midnight on the roof while conversing about their life.
"It's been quite long time since I last saw you, when was the last time we chatted like this?" a rare smile was etched on Dell lip, a certainty of under the comfortable atmosphere.
"Perhaps, I think when you brought the oblivion songstress to the club while I was tending your drink as a bartender" spoke the black haired boy
"So detailed, it's annoy me, Rei"
Rei chuckled hearing Dell's straightforward response, "Can't change that, this is who I am"
Both boys turned silence for a while, enjoying the comfortable atmosphere before Rei break the voiceless atmosphere, "Have you found your family?"
Dell was taken aback by the sudden questions, with eyes widened he looked at the person in front of him, thinking whether or not have the bartender gone mad. But reality slapped him when he realized . . .
. . . that only he and Kaito had remembered their memories
The sudden change of expressions also surprised Rei, as it was not the usual expression Dell show when he asked this questions.
"What's wrong?" Rei was worried if his questions depress him,
Supposed he knew, that it was not Rei fault for Dell to be depressed. Among all people who has connections with Dell except Kugetsu, only Kaito has regained some of his memories, while the other remained unable to remember their own past.
It doesn't felt wrong but it doesn't felt right. After all, if all of them were considered as a patient, he might be the only patient who was informed by the doctor that his illness could be cured. While the other still remain unknown about their future.
He could felt his chest hurting for a moment, he replied sadly "I miss her . . ."
. . .
. . .
. . .
"Come in! Rin, Kaito and Miku!"
When I heard she spelt those name, I could felt fear creeping towards me, but it failed to possess me. Rather than that, I felt calm, very calm. My body no longer have spot for depression and fear to reside. I kicked them out immediately the moment I start living in Clockwerk Alley.
There was only one girl which I could not recognize other than the Witch and her henchman.
"These are my friend, Kaito, Rin and Miku" Gumi said as she pointed one by one at the respective person.
Their gaze seems unfazed as they didn't recognize me thanks to the hood and my hair color. But eventually they just smiled at me except . . . Miku.
There just seems so many things hidden behind her calming smile, it's like she was trying hard not to let anything resurfaced at her expression. She tried so hard that everything looks ready to fell apart . . .
"This is Dell, he is someone I recently befriended" Gumi spoke again cheerfully, as a formality, three of them bow a bit to greet in which I return the bow.
The five of us sat on the floor in circling manner, introducing each other and talked about daily things. Mostly about how school going on, and vacation during weekend. When Gumi offer the second cup of tea at them, I noticed Miku's gesture was a bit strange. It's obvious how she was shaking whenever she encircled her finger at the cup handle. I blend in with conversation, at the same time carefully stealing glance at her Gestures.
Surprisingly, the conversation blend well and they get along fast with me. Even though I believe I spoke with a cold manner, they seems unfazed with it. Ironic indeed, when they were the one outcast me at first.
But those tragedy was casted aside from my memory when I keep noticing how strange Miku's behavior, from the conversation I found out that she and Kaito were currently dating, yet whenever Kaito accidently touched her hand, she would flinch in definitely not a shy manner. More like a frightened reaction.
My suspicion were getting clear when I follow them on the way back home. His once kind face turned sour the moment both of them were alone. He didn't hesitate to use verbal abuse on her or even slap her. The helpless girl didn't retaliate, rather she was submissive towards his tormentor. He said that he hated her for smiling happily like that in front of Gumi and how she didn't spoke much the entire time the conversation went on.
His hand choked her neck immediately when she didn't respond at his anger. I calmly watch as the situation unfold in front of me, the Kaito I once know has changed so much since the last time I saw him. Or perhaps this was the real him from the very start? No one able to answer that question yet.
. . .
. . .
. . .
There are time when Gumi would invite me to accompany her to music gallery. She once told me it was her favorite place. However, when I arrived at the gallery she mentioned, I was sure it is definitely not a music gallery which I had in my mind when she mention it.
The place is called "Midnight Club", a place where all kind of sins were allowed. When our step touched the ground which belongs to that dirty club, everything became different. It's like entering into a different world.
"This is not a music gallery" I said
But she would face with her smile like usual and say, "No, this is the place"
At that time I did not understand what does she mean by that, but those answers needed for my curiosity were unfolded once I saw a light shone on the stage. It shine at a certain spot in which a girl with hood stood. And everything turned silent when she was on the stage. It was like she has casted a spell on every audience inside the room. Which made them unable to tear their eyes off from her.
Perhaps among those people, I and Gumi were the only one unaffected by her voice. Because when her voice filled the building, most people seems entering trance. It was like they were forgetting about the world their living in at the moment. The once sinful place turned into serene solace. Just with her voice. The soft gentle tone which completely transform the atmosphere of the place.
"Beautiful right? It was like she is the God of this place" spoke Gumi
I simply shrug it off, "Shifting the atmosphere is indeed amazing. However it would be exaggerating to say she is God"
The girl chuckled when she heard my reply, people around the room then start to move. It was at this moment that I realized that people who occupy the room were mostly a pair of man and woman. Having the sound guiding them, they start to waltz with their partner, acting on the will of the song.
Is this some kind of coincidence?
Gumi seems noticed my confusion, she turn her body to my direction and told me, "Today is a special day, on this day couple would enter this place to waltz"
She turned her head to gaze at the source of calmness, ". . . and to listen at her"
On that day it is the first time I could saw how peaceful Gumi face is, basking under the guidance of the singer. The singer who could shift atmosphere with her song, perhaps it is indeed a gift from the god. It sounds truly like a miracle in those books.
I think it is around that time, that I meet Kugetsu, an annoying doctor who study in Psychology and Mental Health. It was also at that moment I learn about another truth behind my former friends . . .