There is Always….
By: Johonna Marie Higgins
Here it is da datah dahhh; my first In Plain Sight fanfic. I don't own anything, except my imagination. Don't forget to press the little button at the bottom and make my day! Seriously, it doesn't take much to make me happy, so drop me a line. Did ya love it? Hate it? Spelling mistakes? Words of wisdom or advice? All is welcome.
Thanks for reading, and enjoy!
A quick structural note;
This font is the song
This font is the story
This font is the epilogue
I close both locks below the window.
I close both blinds and turn away.
Sometimes solutions aren't so simple.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.
And the sun will set for you.
The sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.
Pink cards and flowers on your window,
Your friends all plead for you to stay.
Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.
And the sun will set for you.
The sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.
[Guitar solo]
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.
-Shadow of the Day
By: Linkin Park
I close both locks below the window.
Marshall locked the door to the office on his way out. After a long day, he was tired. He'd had a stressful day, rescuing a witness from a crazy stalker ex boyfriend. It wasn't dangerous, but there was a full man hunt to find the witness. They had no idea what type of threat it had been. It turned out that he had taken her to dinner at a restaurant to try and win her back. Needless to say, he won't be getting a card during his jail time from her.
I close both blinds and turn away.
The image of Mary running into Raph's arms at the train station ran through his mind. He'd driven her to the station so that she could meet Raph; they were going away on a trip for the holiday weekend.
He still couldn't think of Mary being engaged without considerable heart ache.
He'd gone back to the office to get some more work done, but really he was just trying to make himself busy so he wouldn't have time to think about Mary. And how she was off with another guy, and he was at home alone. He was a base for her to come back to, but only on her terms. He was just a partner, only there to support her.
Sometimes solutions aren't so simple.
He still hadn't found a way to tell her that he loved her. Not after they had been together for so long. Their partnership was better than nothing, after all. And he knew that this move would make or break their relationship. And he didn't know if he could handle all or nothing.
Still, seeing His Mary going away with her fiance hurt. It hurt even more that he had to hide his feelings; he could never trade her happiness for his.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.
The thing that bugged him the most was that she hadn't even said goodbye. She'd been too consumed with getting to her train on time, she was running late again.
She hadn't thanked him for the ride either, though it was unusual for her to say thanks. But she took him for granted, again.
That's the way it always was.
Marshall was always around, always willing to help.
Like the child who doesn't understand how much their mother does for them until one day, they aren't there. You can't appreciate what you have until it's gone.
She never understood the reason for his devotion and willingness to help. He wanted to help her in any way he could, because he loved her.
But she trusted him. And that was something he couldn't break, not without hurting Mary. And she would see his love as breaking that trust, because she could never get really close to a man. Not after her father had left her. She was distant and kept most people at arm's length.
No, she had accepted Marshall into her small inner circle of people who really knew her, but even then, there was another barrier to her heart. Like the 7 rings of hell, there were levels of her heart. Fewer were allowed in, the closer you got, and none were in the final ring, not after the only occupant had left. Her father had taken her heart and ripped it to shreds with his abandonment. Now no one could get that close, because if her heart broke again, she might not recover.
If he ever told her about his feelings, she would demote him to the outermost ring, with all the strangers of the world, just so her heart wouldn't have a chance of being hurt again.
And the sun will set for you.
He had always given his all for Mary. She was the force of absolute power in his life. He sometimes got so caught up in watching her at work, that a who day would go by, and he would accomplish nothing. She teased him for working late, being an overachiever. When really he was trying to catch up, make up the work he had neglected.
That night the work had been tedious. Forms and forms blurred together into boring hours of work without Mary around to bring a little entertainment. The nips he had taken from the bottle hidden in Mary's desk had helped. But he would owe her a new bottle when she came back.
The sun will set for you.
His thoughts consumed his slightly buzzed brains attention as he drove home.
He would walk over fire for her. He usually followed her direction even if it meant going against Stan and the Department. Nobody could to stop him from helping her not the government, not her family, not even Mary herself.
And the shadow of the day,
It would take no less than death to keep him from helping Mary however he can.
Marshall's senses were so dulled and his attention so preoccupied; he didn't notice the changing light.
Will embrace the world in grey,
The semi's horn blared like a thousand horns, trying to alert the car in its path. Unable to stop, the truck surged forward, brakes shrieking.
The impact of the semi crumpled his truck like a used tissue. The truck twisted around Marshall like a steel cocoon. Glass shattered and the world was turned upside down as the car rolled.
7 times, side over side, the truck rolled, flipping once before finally coming to a stop on its roof.
And the sun will set for you.
The world went silent for Marshall as he hung upside down, restrained to the mashed up remains of his truck.
The last thing Marshall thought before the world went black was that now she would appreciate what they had had together; all that he had done for her, but only because he was gone. He realized that he never told Mary how he felt and now it was too late, and now she would never even know.
Pink cards and flowers on your window,
The rising sun brought light to the new day. It was 32 hours since the car accident.
Flowers and cards from well wishers lined the tables in the bleak hospital room. Every witness in Albuquerque had sent some kind of memento to their favorite marshal.
Tubes and wires connected Marshall to every machine known to man. There were beeps and whirrs, all monitoring the life that was hanging in the balance.
Your friends all plead for you to stay.
Marshall had been in and out surgery ever since he was loaded into the ambulance. He was covered in cuts and black and blue all over. There were stitches everywhere, giving Marshall the apparence of Frankenstein.
He was still in a coma due to his head injuries.
Everyone who worked with the marshal was gathered in the room; Stan, Eleanor, Bobby D and Mary. Jinx, Brandi, Raph and Peter were there also, for support and to wish their acquaintance well. Marshall's family had yet to be reached.
Stan, Peter, and Raph stood away from the hospital bed, waiting near the door for the doctor's prognosis.
Brandi, Jinx and Eleanor were gathered near the bed, sad eyes drinking in the beaten man they saw before them. It was sad, because normally he was so in control and strong willed, and now he lay helpless on the brink on death.
Mary just looked out the window, oblivious to everyone else around her. She was still in shock about Marshall. She was angry with herself that she had been off having fun while he was in a life and death struggle. She hadn't gotten back to Albuquerque until 8 that morning, almost a whole day after Marshall's accident. She couldn't believe that no one had called her until 6 this morning; he was her partner for goodness sake. He would never have left her alone like this, just so he could have fun on vacation. Marshall would drop everything for her, and she couldn't even do the same when it really mattered.
The tall, tired looking, grey haired doctor finally came in to give a debriefing on his battle warn patients condition.
"There were severe injuries to several parts of his body. He has a few broken ribs, a punctured lung, and a ruptured spleen. His right arm, wrist and leg are broken, along with his pelvis and collar bone. We have repaired the spleen and fixed his lung. We also had to put pins in his wrist and arm, his leg we had to plate and screw." Everyone listened intently to the doctor's explanation. "With the crash he had we would expect some brain injury, possibly a TBI. However he should regain consciousness in a few days. If not, he may have suffered more brain damage than we can see right now. The first few days are the most uncertain, but the longer he lives the better chance he has to recover."
Mary turned away from the doctor, looking out the window but focusing nothing.
There was a moment of silence before Brandi spoke up.
"Would it help if we talk to him? I heard that sometimes people who were almost dead were brought back by familiar voices." She looked hopefully at the doctor, almost innocently like a child.
"Scientifically, there is no proof of such methods working." He said slowly. Peter gripped Brandi's hand as her eyes watered.
"But," The doctor said, as he looked at them all, "I have worked here for nearly 15 years, and I have come to see that anything is possible and miracles can happen. Though there is no certainty, there is always hope." He nodded to the family and stepped out of the room.
Stan followed him, wanting some answers to questions that might upset the females in the room.
"Doc?" Stan asked, quickening his step to catch the doctor who was headed to the cafeteria. "Got a minute?"
"If you don't mind talking over lunch, I haven't eaten in hours." Dr. Ancora replied, smiling slightly.
"Not at all." Stan followed the white coated man into the food line, picking up a granola bar and some coffee for himself.
They sat at a small table near the window. Stan waited for the doctor to eat a bit before he began to ask questions.
"How good are the kid's chances of pulling through?" Stan was sad to have to ask this question, but he had to know.
"Given the amount of blood loss, and the extensive injuries I would say not good. But he received very prompt medical attention, and hasn't had a crash yet." The doctor quickly crossed himself against a jinx. "But he seems a fighter to me, and that makes all the difference. He has a great chance if he wants it badly enough. But without a will there is no way…" The doctor trailed off, not needing to say what everyone knew was a worst case scenario ending.
Stan asked many questions over the 20 minutes the doctor spent eating, the chances of a full recovery, possible lasting damage and things of the sort.
But there was no real definite answer, anything could happen.
Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple.
Bobby D left soon after Stan, he had to get back to the office and finish investigating the accident. He wanted to tread carefully, and do as thorough a job as he could. From eye witness statements and the truck drivers account, Marshall had ran the light into oncoming traffic. Bobby knew this didn't sound like Marshall. But accidents happened, and Bobby hoped the marshal pulled though, he was the only sane one Bobby could reason with when PD and Wit-Sec crossed paths.
Jinx and Peter walked to the coffee shop in the lobby for a strong cup of coffee, the best thing in a situation like this when alcohol wasn't an option.
Brandi and Eleanor sat on either side of Marshall, each holding a hand carefully. Mary heard their faint voices talking to him, but ignored them. She was still a statue at the far end of the room, her back turned to the reality behind her.
Raph came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He lent to whisper in her ear, but she just escaped his hold and moved farther away.
"Mary, what's wrong? Why are you so angry?" He asked cautiously, treading lightly to not provoke the lioness before him.
She remained quiet, energy focused on keeping her rage and anger repressed. She was a pot of water set on high, slowly boiling and threatening to spill over.
"You can't just ignore this, you have to face it." He said, reaching out and grabbing her chin to turn her to look at her partner.
Mary slapped his arm away and growled, "Touch me again and it will be the last thing you ever do."
Raph stepped away, backing a few feet but still facing her.
"You can't be selfish now, you need all the support you can get and you need to support your friends." He said, looking at her squarely.
"What friends do I have? Nobody even told me about this until a day after the fact!" She turned to Eleanor, raising her voice slightly, "Was this your call to make? After all the petty arguments we have, you would sink this low for revenge? Or did Stan just happen to take your advice? He must have, because this is totally out of character for him, he is a feeling and understanding human being!"
Stan walked into the room just then, catching the last of Mary's accusations.
"I would never…" Eleanor started, hurt and enraged at such a despicable accusation, only to be cut off by Stan.
"Hey. What kind of talk is this? Eleanor has done nothing to warrant such blatantly false insinuations. After I got the call, you were the first person I called!" Stan wasn't yelling, but he was speaking in his authoritative voice.
"I never, got the call." Mary shot back, only a little less volatile after Stan's rebuttal.
"I called your cell at 11:10 pm, check your logs." Stan went and sat in a chair on Eleanor's side of the bed, taking her hand in his comfortingly; to hell with people knowing there was a little something going on there, and this was a stressful time for the Marshal team.
Mary whipped her phone out of her pocket and checked the logs; there was a received call from Stan right around that time. She knew that she didn't answer it, so she turned to Raph.
He had backed away a little, looking ashamed. That was all the proof Mary needed.
She yelled now, fists clenched and mind raging. "You got the call and didn't tell me!"
"I…I" Raph tried, "I got the call, but I figured that it was…how you say… no big deal. So he broke an arm or leg, he would be fine. You would insist on leaving and all that trouble would have been for nothing!"
Raph looked a bit surer of himself, but Mary was practically on fire with anger.
"You didn't tell me my partner was on the verge of death, because you wanted to get LAID! I'll kill you!" She was going at him now, anger turned to violence.
She got in a good sock to the eye and had split his lip, before Stan got a hold on her.
Peter and Jinx returned just then and Peter helped to hold Mary.
Eleanor and Brandi pushed Raph out of the room, and then tried to calm Mary down.
Jinx took Raph to the nurse's station, where the nurses flitted and flirted while cleaning his wounds.
"What did you do?" Jinx asked for she knew that Mary had a temper but she had rarely seen her eldest daughter go completely crazy with rage before.
Brandi can out of the room to demand the same thing; she knew it had to be a major deal for Mary to lose it.
Raph explained how he had gotten Stan's call while Mary was in the shower. He thought that it was a minor accident, at worst a few bumps and a broken limb. So he decided to wait and tell Mary the following morning.
Brandi was about to hit him, but he told her to wait until the end.
He said that he hadn't spent any private time with Mary in a long time; she was always too busy with work and her family. He had gone to a lot of trouble to get the reservation; at the hotel they stayed, at moved 3 times when she had canceled before. He wanted one night to have Mary to himself.
After he finished, Brandi slapped him. "Chico, how could you think that you get to decide who is worth spending time with or not? Mary chooses who is more important, and no one else should ever take that decision away from her! And for such horribly selfish reasons! Marshall could die, and all she can think of is how guilty she feels!"
Brandi stormed away, back to Marshall's room.
"You had best leave. And don't you dare call Mary." Jinx said, looking to Raphael before following her daughter.
"How will I be able to talk to her?" He asked with sadness in his voice.
"If she wants to talk to you, she will call. Otherwise you leave her alone, or so help me god, I will take her gun and shoot you myself." Jinx wasn't often defensive of her eldest daughter, normally it was the complete opposite, but she couldn't stand by and watch while Raph hurt her daughter and her already messed up life. Even she was truly sad and worried about Marshall; the only man to ever have a real, lasting relationship with Mary, he understood her like no other.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.
Raph wanted one last chance, if there was no hope he would give up now. He walked calmly into the hospital room again.
Mary was sitting in a chair by the window, Brandi and Eleanor across from her, Jinx was near Marshall. Stan and Peter stood at the foot of the bed, between the women and Raph.
Mary looked up to see him standing in the door way.
She got up, and walked toward him. Stan and Peter quickly stopped her, but she just nodded calmly to the look Stan gave her. It was her silent promise for no violence.
They stepped out of the way. Mary walked up to Raph. She gently pushed him backwards a few steps with a hand on his chest. She reached out and dropped something into his hand and stepped back in the room.
"Goodbye Raph." Was all she said, before shutting the door.
Raph looked at the ring in his hand, knowing that she was lost to him forever.
And the shadow of the day,
The next few days were tough. Mary refused to leave Marshall's room, except for when he was taken for more tests would she leave to go shower or eat.
Will embrace the world in grey,
There was still marshal work to be done, but Mary was in no condition for it. Stan had 2 temporary agents sent in from San Francisco to help take care of business while she was on leave.
Marshall's parent's still hadn't arrived. Apparently the contact information they had on file was old.
This was the reason Mary and Stan went to his apartment during a minor surgery nearly a week after the initial accident.
They tried to find some more information on his parent's whereabouts. Mary was going through the papers on Marshall's desk, while Stan looked through the well organized filing cabinet.
Mary didn't find anything on the Mann's but she did find an un-mailed, unsealed letter to herself. She opened it and pulled out the pages for a quick glance. They were dated vary recently. She decided it must be important, and seeing as it was for her, she pocketed it.
After promising Stan that she would call if there was any progress, Mary went back to the hotel.
Brandi was there with a new change of clothes and some 'survival' supplies; a word puzzle, newspaper, a novel, coke and a candy bar.
Squish had been Mary's lifesaver all week. Bringing clothes and food and other things. She also sat, for as long as her classes aloud, with Mary by a still comatose Marshall.
And the sun will set for you.
Mary waited until after Brandi left for her afternoon class to open her stolen letter.
She was very surprised to find a letter from Marshall to herself.
Dear Mary,
I know that receiving this letter will be frustrating, but please don't shred it in anger. I know your temperament too well though, so I got a tear resistant paper.
Mary smiled and chuckled, looking at the man beside her, she realized that he knew her well.
This may enrage you more, and I am sorry I cannot see it. Your reading this means I have died or have left.
Mary's eyes widened. How could he have written such a letter? Was he planning on leaving? She read on quickly.
And as far as I can tell, I'm still alive, so I will write as if it is for the latter.
I know that my leaving you and our partnership will be taken badly, and for that I am sorry. I know that among many people, you trust but a few. And my leaving will be seen as a betrayal, and I will lose your trust. But I do not take any pleasure in this. It had to be this way.
Mary stopped breathing for a moment; she let out a breath after reading the paragraph. He was going to leave, to abandon her! Why, what could possibly have happened? This wasn't the Marshall she knew.
You know me very well, Ms. Mary Shannon, but there are somethings you have never known. Besides the fact that I still have Finn, my stuffed bear, hidden in my closet that is.
Mary smiled, she did know about that. But seeing as she had a few childish treasures hidden herself, she chose not to tease Marshall about it. She had found it the day Marshall had gotten shot, getting him some clean clothes to be discharged in; she found the bear on the corner of the top shelf. It was cared for, but still warm from love. She had sat looking at it for 12 minutes, thinking of little Marshall before she realized what she was doing and put it back.
Whoops, that leaves one secret.
The one major thing, the reason for my leaving, is that I love you.
Mary stopped reading, eyes wide and stared at the paper in her hands and at the man beside her. What…how… her thoughts were in a state of chaos. How could Cowboy have felt this way and she never noticed? And he never told her. She had to read more.
That's my girl, I'm sure you react to those 3 words as I expected, unbelieving.
No, this isn't a joke Mary.
You may choose to be blind all you like, but that is the truth, I love you. And honestly I probably always have. Even from the first time we met.
Yes, even then. You remember that 1st meeting, don't you? You gave me my cowboy nickname that day, and threatened my progeny.
Mary did remember that day. She was a transfer, passed around like a hot potato no one wanted to be stuck with. Until the idiot from New Mexico heard about her. Marshall had convinced Stan to request her for a trial period, and she first met Marshall at the airport.
Standing on the runway in shades and cowboy boots was a tall and imposing Marshall Mann.
He had been an interesting break from the uniformity Mary was used to. Jersey boys all adopted the same unofficial official uniform, jeans, a button up and their badge.
After being informed of his name on the ride over, she tested his humor with a round of teasing about his name and job, 'Marshal Marshall'.
"You need a name that's less stupid." She had said, glancing at him as he drove, trying to think of one.
"Says the woman named Margaret." He'd retorted, not faltering at her glare.
"Name's Mary, forget that and you can say goodbye to your chance at having kids, cowboy." She turned to look out the window, silence falling over the car.
'He's intimidated.' She thought, 'wimp'
"Hmm, not very original but partially applicable. Though I like to think of myself more as a super hero." He had turned his head to look at her and smile.
She couldn't help but smile a bit before barking, "Eyes on the road."
That was also the day she found out that he wasn't just a smartass with nothing to back up his talk.
Their witness was being followed by a gang and the marshals hadn't had time to even practice together.
Mary took point, just on instinct, trying to rush her witness into the safe house while Marshall covered her. 2 guys rounded the corner of the car, but Marshall stopped them dead in their tracks before Mary knew they were there.
Witness protected, Mary and Marshall attempted to neutralize the threat.
The one story had bullet proof glass windows and 2 exits.
Mary went around clockwise and Marshall went counter they meet at the back where they both faced 4 gang members, trying to kick down the door. Mary took out the one with a gun, while Marshall tried to get the others to surrender. One of the 3 was reaching for his waist slowly, Marshall told him to stop. The guy kept reaching, so Marshall popped one off into his hand. The other two turned tail and made off in the getaway van. Mary shot the back tires as Marshall cuffed the wounded gang member.
The van had crashed into a telephone pole, clearly down for the count. Local PD arrived to a call of shots fired, and arrested the 2 who were attempting to flee. They took the third to the hospital, while Marshall and Mary saw to their witness.
Mary never admitted it to him, but Marshall could be one bad ass lawman, and she loved that about him.
Remember how we just worked? There was no training or anything, it was automatic.
That is only one of many reasons why you are 'mine heart's desire'.
Mary scoffed in spite of topic she was reading; Marshall was such a girl sometimes.
You probably wonder why I never told you. And I can't be completely sure myself.
You were always dating someone, weather you saw it as committed or not, you were taken. I didn't want to barge in and interrupt your happiness, just because I was less than pleased.
And this is the reason I have to leave. I can't sit by any longer and watch as time after time, you always go for the wrong man.
So he was leaving because he didn't like who I chose to date. That little…. Mary's anger was only half hearted as she forced herself to finish reading.
I don't want to leave, but I cannot continue to decay inside. We all have a breaking point, and this is it. Something has gotta give, and so it will be me.
'So he couldn't handle it, that's why. He got soft on me.' Mary was struggling to keep an angry feeling burning, so she didn't fall into sadness.
I have always been here for you Mary. I do whatever you need, because I want to help. Your happiness is mine.
You said I was the only person you trusted, the only one to keep their promises. And yet you go off and get engaged to a man you cannot even trust. And this wounds me greatly, because I can see that it cannot end well. You can't be happy with someone you don't trust.
Mary felt a barb in her heart; she wrapped her free arm around her self and kept on.
But I cannot beret you for your choices. I have always and will always love you, no matter what you do. Even if you do marry that stupid loco, Raphael.
She knew that Marshall never took a good shine to Raph, at least now she knew why.
And it made sense now, why she took so long to say yes to Raph, she didn't trust him. Look at what happened when she took that leap without trust, she had gotten hurt
When had she come to trust Marshall so much? It was an unseen change, they just slowly drifted together. There was trust. And Mary hadn't trusted anyone in a long, long time.
I hope that you know you will always be loved. I don't know about how or where, we will end up, but I will never stop loving you.
Everyone deserves to be happy. So don't forget that, Mare. You have to let people in, people need people.
People can love, and they can leave, but the ones who truly love you will NEVER leave you completely. They leave an imprint on our hearts. They change us for the better. It may hurt at first, but time heals all wounds.
And I hope you will always carry around at least a little of me in your heart.
You will always be the center of mine, Mary Shannon.
I hope that you can forgive me.
Love forever,
Marshall Mann
"Damn", was the only thing Mary could manage to say?
Will embrace the world in grey,
Mary couldn't even think clearly. Her brain was a mess, her view of the world and her whole life thrown into chaos by 2 mere pieces of paper.
She leaned over Marshall's battered body and wept. She hadn't cried like this since her father had left, but she paid no attention. Her only function was letting the pain she felt, for Marshall and for herself, out.
There was something different in their relationship, compared to all Mary's other ones. That was what made her so emotional. She couldn't stand to see the one person she'd ever cared for deeply and trusted, leave. And worse, she had never realized how important Marshall was to her.
He was always there. No matter the time, or place. It wasn't a variable, it was constant. Marshall was her constant, her rock, her anchor, her safe harbor.
He had tried, she realized, to tell her. His toast at her impromptu engagement party at work, he had said the words. He had told her that he loved her, but she hadn't allowed herself to see beyond the companionable words everyone heard. There was meaning hidden beneath them, she had just been blind to it.
This was how Jinx and Brandi found Mary when they arrived with dinner, crying and hugging her arms across her torso. Like she was trying to hold herself together.
They were very surprised; to see the strong girl they knew, crying her eyes out.
Brandi hugged Mary to her while Jinx rubbed her back. They wanted so badly to ask what was wrong, but Mary refused to say anything, she cried until the tears ran out. Then she denied anything to eat, she just climbed into the empty bed next to Marshalls and slept.
Brandi and Jinx asked Stan, when he stopped by shortly after Mary fell asleep, if he knew anything that had happened.
They found the doctor, and asked if there had been any bad news.
"No, Mr. Mann is doing reasonably well. We would like to see him wake by tomorrow, or we will have to start looking into the possibility of more severe brain damage." He was gentle as he told them the news, but it was hard to take in.
The girls went back to the room, to visit Marshall and see if Mary would talk.
Stan spoke to the doctor in 'plain terms'.
The doctor explained that if Marshall didn't wake up soon, there was a strong possibility that he never would.
And the sun will set for you.
Jinx left around 9; she had to get up for work early. Stan left soon after for the same reason.
But Brandi stayed at the hospital with Mary.
Brandi found the letter tucked under Marshall's arm. She read it while Mary was asleep. It made her cry.
Poor, poor, Marshall had been in love with her sister for a long time. And Mary had never seen it.
Brandi had suspected they had some history, but Mary always laughed it off. Marshall's clenched fists and masked disdain made sense now. Brandi thought that he just didn't like Chico, well he was right on that one. Even she didn't like him now, not after what pain he had caused Mary.
Brandi hoped her older sister would accept Marshall; he was the only one who could make her happy. Even more so, she hoped he pulled through. Even if Mary couldn't love him back, he deserved to live. Brandi whispered this to him, getting no response other than the beeping of the machines.
Mary woke to see Brandi with the letter.
All Mary had dreamed and thought about since reading it was how much she needed Marshall in her life. How she always depended on him. All the times she was in danger and he saved her. All the times he refused to be pushed away, despite how hard she tried. All the time he had put his neck out for her, or dropped everything to help her.
She also thought about all the times she hadn't done the same for him. She knew she should have, but she had been too scared.
He was always giving, and never receiving anything in return.
Mary started to cry again.
She couldn't be afraid any more, not after this. There could be nothing worse than the pain she felt in her heart now.
Brandi crawled in bed and held her sister.
"Mary what's wrong?" She asked.
"I" Mary had a hard time forming the words. "I…love him…"
Brandi smiled sadly, but stroked her sister's hair. "Why is that so sad? He's not that bad looking."
Mary made a slight scoffing noise, a laugh drowned under her tears. "It's too late….I'm... too late."
"Nothing is ever too late until it's over completely." Brandi reminded her, "Why don't you try talking to him. He said he'd walk through hell for you and I think you could guide him back. Back to the living, back to you."
Mary's crying lessened a little, but she was still scared. The great kick-ass Marshal Mary Shannon scared of her partner.
"What if it doesn't work?" Mary asked, as quietly as she could.
"At least you know you did everything you could. Miracles are possible, Mary. You have to believe."
Mary nodded; she had never heard wiser words from her baby sister in her whole life.
She'd be dammed if she let her partner go without a fight.
And the shadow of the day,
Albuquerque's purple sky was ablaze by the 3 suns hanging over the land. The grass was orange, and the water green. But the world Marshall saw now was much more like his home than a dream.
Will embrace the world in grey,
He knew this must be a dream after he saw Stan walk through his bedroom door to tell him it was time to get up. Marshall complied, getting dressed, but taking in the similar, yet strange reality he was in.
The last thing he remembered…. those lights.
His fingers froze on his shirt buttons; he had been hit by a truck. He'd run the light and now he was, he was….well he didn't really know what the heck he was.
He pinches his arm, but felt no pain.
So not alive.
But heaven was supposed to be pearl white gates and angels with wings, according to his Christian parents.
Maybe limbo, he thought as he walked into the living room. It wasn't really the living room, it was the office.
And the sun will set for you.
Except Stan and Eleanor were dressed as pirates and kissing.
And there was a pink bunny in his chair and a storm trooper at the water cooler.
Marshall sat at Mary's desk, looking around but seeing no sign of her.
This was a very entertaining scene, but Marshall wondered how long this allusion could last.
[Guitar solo]
And the shadow of the day,
Suddenly he heard Brandi's voice. Not from the world he was looking at, but from within.
Marshall closed his eyes and tried to pinpoint where it was coming from.
A red door appeared in the middle of the room. Marshall stepped up to it and tried to open it. It opened and he went through it.
There was nothingness to the air around him. Void of anything but the white door before him.
Faintly he felt a tug to his body, heavy with injury and life. The voices were clearer now; he could hear what they were saying to him.
Stan told him to hang in there, Eleanor saying they needed a rational human around the office.
He could almost feel the wires and tubes sticking to his body. But he couldn't return to his body. He tried to walk towards the door, but a tall tired looking, grey haired doctor stopped him.
"Not yet." He said. "You have to wait for your call."
Marshall didn't understand what he meant, and tried to ask, but he had no voice.
He just stood there, listening to the different people in his life beg him to pull through.
He'd heard them all, all except her, Mary.
He waited and waited. It felt odd, for he had no notion of time, but Marshall felt like he was running out of time.
She had to speak to him, didn't she? Didn't she care? Was she even there? Or was she still on vacation?
NO. Marshall mentally argued with himself. She would never trade our partnership for a vacation, not for anything.
Marshall felt his body growing fainter.
Each new time that Brandi or Stan talked to him, it got harder and harder to hear.
Will embrace the world in grey,
Just before he felt all was lost, he heard her.
Faintly, he heard someone crying as they spoke to him.
Soon he felt the connection strengthen, and could make out what was being said.
Mary, his Mary, was crying as she told him how he was in trouble.
She had found his letter, the one he never intended to mail.
She knew.
This lifted a great burden from Marshall's proverbial shoulders. He felt his body now, stronger than ever before. The bruises ached dully, and the cuts sharply, his leg stiff from pins.
"I can't let you leave me Marshall." She said.
Spirit Marshall, as he thought of the part of himself in the space like void, turned his head to the doctor.
The doctor signaled him to wait, and then he could open the door.
"I don't know what I would do without you, Cowboy." Mary said, gripping Real Marshall's hand.
The doctor beckoned Spirit Marshall over.
"I…I love you."
The door was thrown open, revealing a blinding light.
Spirit Marshall stood just before it, hesitantly.
The doctor put his hands on Spirit Marshall's shoulders and said, "Semper spes est." Then he pushed Spirit Marshall into the light.
And the sun will set for you.
The first thing Marshall felt was Mary's hand holding his. His fingers tightened around hers as the wave of pain hit him. His body had been beaten and thrown around like a rag doll. He almost wished to go back to the limbo like world, almost.
Marshall's fingers tightened a little more as he heard her gasp. Slowly, because his bodily eyes were unaccustomed to such light, he opened his eyes.
Mary was sitting at his bed side, her face tear stained and puffy. Her clothes rumpled and wrinkled, but still the Mary he knew.
She pressed a hand to her mouth to contain her sob, dropping an envelope onto Marshall's lap.
'Damn.' He thought, eyes flicking to it and widening in recognition. She had found the letter, his confession letter. The one she wasn't meant to see.
But considering the outcome, he wasn't too hurt by her invasion of his privacy.
Brandi came over and rubbed her sister's back, asking what was wrong.
Brandi noticed Marshall's eyes and screamed. She was so happy she was almost bursting. After hugging, a still unmoving Marshall, gently she ran off to go get the doctor and call everyone.
Mary was still crying, but Marshall found he couldn't speak to her. A breathing tube was placed down his throat, hindering any communication but the tightening and loosing of his fingers.
The doctor came in, followed by a hyper Brandi and Peter.
The doctor asked Marshall to blink once for yes and twice for no, and asked a series of questions. After wiggling his toes and fingers, the doctor told him they would remove his breathing tube shortly.
Stan, Eleanor and Jinx had arrived by the time the doctor and nurses returned to take out the tube.
They were all happy, smiles on all of their faces, thanks to a now conscience marshal.
The tube caused Marshall to cough as it was removed, and his throat felt like he'd swallowed nails.
But he tried to speak, despite the doctor telling him to take it easy.
He looked at Mary, still holding her hand in his, "I…love…you…too." His voice was almost a whisper and scratchier than a smoker, but Mary heard him.
He smiled at her as she let a few tears slip. She took his hand and kissed it softly, looking at him tenderly. "Back 'atcha Cowboy."
A week or so later, while Mary and Marshall were sharing a cafeteria meal in his hospital room, Marshall dropped his silverware sending ketchup onto Mary's shirt.
"What give's Doofus?" She asked, whipping the spot off her shirt.
"What is my Doctor's last name?" He asked, suddenly thinking himself crazy.
"Dr. Baker. Why?" Mary raised an eyebrow as she opened her chips and popped one into her mouth.
"I thought his name was Ancora?" Marshall was really thinking himself crazy now.
"That was the surgeon who operated on you for 18 straight hours. He was a guest, and left soon after your surgery. How do you know that?" Mary asked, suspiciously.
"You wouldn't believe me if I told you." He said teasingly, steeling a chip from her bag.
She pulled them away half heartedly, blocking them from his grasp.
He lent forward and kissed her. She smiled at him after he pulled away, until she saw the chips in his hand.
"You cheater!"
Marshal vowed never to tell anyone about his limbo experience. Or the fact that he couldn't begin to explain; the doctor who had kept him from the white door had the name tag, Dr. Ancora.
Ancora meant hope in Latin. And just before he push Marshall through the door, the Dr. had said, "Semper spes est," which translated means, "There is always hope."
I hope you enjoyed my humble first attempt.
Lemme know how it went. Sometimes things sound better in my head than on paper. .
Review if you please!