(a/n) Hey there~! Sparkley-chan here (who else would it be?), and I just need to apologize. I know some are waiting for the next chapter for Surfing the Web, but I dunno when that'll be happening. I heard awful, awful rumors/spoilers about the upcoming episodes, and it sickens my inner-fangirl. I'd like for all of you to be happy and naive to those rumors, so I finished up this facebook-style fic. These things are awesome, and more people should totally write them (even if they are a bitch to format). But, every time I try writing some fluff to cheer myself up, I can't.
So I started writing angst instead. It'll be a slap to the face if I post it, 'cos I usually like writing fluff, or angst and then major fluff. I like happy endings. Alright, sorry for my ramblings, enjoy the story~!
EDIT: I totally forgot - obviously the characters aren't mine, but this is SPAH'verse, gaiz! OUO Which means that Infraredphaeton gets props for her characters and the awesome bromance setup between Wes and David. She's on Livejournal, so look her up. Her fics are terrific!

Kurt Hummel is now friends with Blaine Anderson and two others.

Kurt Hummel I'm an awesome spy.
(Puck Puckerman, David Hardison, and five others like this.)

Wes Heely: LIES.

David Hardison: SPAH!
(Wes Heely like this.)

Puck Puckerman: Who the hell are you?

Blaine Anderson: Pardon my two… acquaintances. We're from Dalton Academy.

Wes Heely: /coughbestfriends. Double Oh Endearing over here is an awful spy. No offense, Kurt.

Kurt Hummel: None taken.

David Hardison: SPAH!

Wes Heely: … Thank you, David.

Kurt Hummel is now friends with Pratik Kapoor, Liam Van Shriek, and fifteen others.

Puck Puckerman to Kurt Hummel I thought we told you to spy on our competition, not go on a fucking lunch date!

Kurt Hummel: What was I supposed to do Puck? They wear uniforms for God's sake!

Blaine Anderson: But they're spiffy uniforms.
(Kurt Hummel likes this.)

Blaine Anderson: And he tried his hardest at being a spy.

Wes Heely: He just failed miserably.

David Hardison: It was actually the other way around – we took him out. And it wasn't even lunch. Just coffee. :D

Kurt Hummel posted a link.
(Blaine Anderson, Santana Lopez, and twenty-eight others like this.)

Eric Lennshardt: I knew it! I knew he was trying to steal our setlist!

Kurt Hummel: Eric, this video is from the Warbler's joint Youtube account.

Eric Lennshardt: How come I didn't know about this?

David Hardison: Hmm, we must've forgotten to mention it Eric. Oops. I wonder why, it's not like YOU'D GO PSYCHO ON US or anything.

Eric Lennshardt: I know how to get to the vents that lead to your room.

Santana Lopez: Hot damn! Who's the shortie in front? I'd tap that.
(Mercedes Jones, Kurt Hummel, Blaine Anderson, and eight others like this.)

Blaine Anderson: I'm flattered (and ignoring the 'shortie' comment), but I'm… how should I put this…

Kurt Hummel: GAY.
(Wes Heely, David Hardison, and four others like this.)

Santana Lopez: And Brittany thinks Kurt is a dolphin.

Blaine Anderson: What does that have to do with anything?

Santana Lopez: Exactly. ;)

Blaine Anderson to Kurt Hummel Wait, why does one of your old Glee members think you're a dolphin?
(Brittany S. Pierce likes this.)

Kurt Hummel: Uhm, I think I'll PM you. I don't want nosy people /coughDavidandWescough/ reading that.

Blaine Anderson, Wes Heely, and David Hardison are now friends with ten other people.

Kurt Hummel Why is my whole Glee club suddenly friends with three people they've deemed "the enemy"?
(Blaine Anderson and two others like this.)

Blaine Anderson: Nobody can resist my charm.

David Hardison: He's given them smile #4, Double Oh, it's futile now.
(Wes Heely likes this.)

Wes Heely: See? We keep telling him if he just gives you smile #12 you two will finally flegkrjf;ahkudshbc—

Blaine Anderson: Sorry, Wes just got a little too caught up in something.

David Hardison: //. But, ohmygod Blaine let's be reasonable dohgudnrgaetnuoa—

Rachel Berry: Kurt, we're merely looking out for you.

Kurt Hummel: /coughbeingnosycough/.

Brittany S. Pierce: Kurt, I think your computer is getting sick.
(Santana Lopez, Kurt Hummel, Blaine Anderson, and three others like this.)

Blaine Anderson: … I think I love you.

Rachel Berry I propose that New Directions does a Katy Perry song. Specifically, I think we should all do California Gurls (with Finn and myself and Ms. Perry and Snoop Dogg). Or Firework (with me as leading vocals).
(Blaine Anderson likes this.)

Blaine Anderson: I like the way this girl thinks.

Quinn Fabray: Rachel, shut up.
(Kurt Hummel, Mercedes Jones, and 396 others like this.)

Wes Heely: I don't even know you personally and I agree.

Blaine Anderson: Wes just doesn't appreciate the ever-lovely songs of Katy Perry. However, I think Kurt should be the one to sing leading vocals. He'd make a swell Katy Perry.

David Hardison: Except you'd have to change your song selection up a bit (in order for Blaine's fantasies to play out correctly). So Kurt should sing "Peacock".

Eric Lennshardt to Blaine Anderson Blaine, I recognize you have some talent as a singer, and that you are aesthetically pleasing to the eye, but if you steal the lead singer of New Directions from me, I swear to God I will climb through the school's vents and slaughter you. Liam said he'd help me hide the body.

Liam Van Shriek: Oddly enough, I don't remember agreeing to that.

Finn Hudson: Are all of you gay? 'Cos I've already had this problem with Kurt.

Kurt Hummel: FINN HUDSON SHUT UP.

Blaine Anderson: … Exactly. Eric, I'm GAY, remember? And Kurt, your almost-step-brother is typing some interesting things. Care to explain?

Mercedes Jones: He isn't, but I sure as hell am! I love me some good gossip time. Sorry, Kurtsie~~ 3

Kurt Hummel: I hate you all.

Liam Van Shriek Has anybody seen Eric Lennshardt?

Wes Heely: He's probably curled up dead inside one of his precious air vents.
(Lee Dwyre, David Hardison, Jim Bond, and twenty-four others like this.)

Eric Lennshardt: Haha, you imbeciles are so amusing.

Liam Van Shriek: … Eric. Where are you!

Eric Lennshardt: I'm currently above Wes, David, and Blaine's room.

Eric Lennshardt: Wesley, why are you and David curled up together reading Blaine's diary? Does he know you have it? It's not very polite to take something without the owner's permission?

David Hardison: Uh-oh… I think shit might just get real.

Wes Heely: David, as much as I agree with you, haven't we talked about the whole vernacular thing?

Eric Lennshardt: This is what the both of you get for starting a Youtube account for the Warblers without my consent.

Blaine Anderson I am going to brutally murder Wes Heely and David Hardison.

Wes Heely: Now Blaine, dear, let's be rational here.

David Hardison: Y'know we're buddies.

Wes Heely: Y'know we're pals.

David Hardison: We're your best friends.

Wes Heely: Deep, deep, deep down, you love us and our… insistent personalities.

David Hardison: Besides, we did it to learn. It's for our vivacious love lives.

Wes Heely November 12th: "I've found a song that mirrors my thoughts about him."

Wes Heely: So excuse me for forgetting,

David Hardison: But these things I do,

Wes Heely: You see, I've forgotten,

David Hardison: If they're green or they're blue,

Wes Heely: Anyway, the thing is what I really mean,

David Hardison: Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen.

Wes Heely: -from Blaine's diary.

Blaine Anderson If anybody knows where the two resident clowns of Kierian House are, tell me right now.

Jim Bond: What's in it for us, darling?

Eric Lennshardt: Yes, I've been bribed with Red Bull.

Blaine Anderson: But Eric, aren't you upset with them for the whole Youtube arrangement?

Eric Lennshardt: They've promised to give me their jello servings for the next three nights if I keep my mouth shut.

Harry Takashima: And brownies. I've been bribed with those.

Lee Dwyre: What the fuck? I wasn't bribed with anything! They're in Wes' fucking car.

Wes Heely: Lee! This is why we violently dislike Hallman House.

David Hardison: Boo, hiss!

Wes Heely: Eric, you aren't getting our jello anymore.

Wes Heely David Hardison and I just left from the nurse's office.
(Blaine Anderson likes this.)

Kurt Hummel to Blaine Anderson Blaine! As much as I realize the value of personal space (try living with Finn for God's sake!) it's no reason to beat up your two (supposed) best friends, no matter how infuriating they get!
(Wes Heely and David Hardison like this.)

Blaine Anderson: I wish I sent them to the nurse's office. They saw me coming and both tried to scramble out the same door, causing one to push into the other until David fell out and Wes fell on top of him.

Kurt Hummel: … Oh. They would do something like that.

David Hardison: In our defense, Blaine looked positively murderous. You'd freak out too if you saw his face.

Wes Heely: Or maybe you'd get turned on, who knows. Maybe you're a masochist.

Kurt Hummel: On second thought, Blaine, you really should beat them up. Or Wes, at least.

Finn Hudson to Kurt Hummel Hey bro, not cool. I'm not nosy!

Finn Hudson: Btw, dude, don't forget about calling Mom and Burt tonight.

Kurt Hummel: And how do you know I'm supposed to do that?

Finn Hudson: Uhm… I heard Burt mention it? :D

Kurt Hummel: Or you looked through my computer.

Finn Hudson: I can't help it! I thought only girls kept diaries. Who's this "dark-haired god" you keep talking about anyway?

David Hardison: I thought only girls did a lot of things before I met Blaine.
(Wes Heely likes this.)

Blaine Anderson: I don't think I've vocalized through social networking sites about how much I hate the both of you.

Blaine Anderson: I hate you two.

Blaine Anderson: And Kurt, pray tell, who is this "dark-haired god" you're apparently referring to in your diary?

Kurt Hummel: Marc Jacobs. He's hot.

David Hardison I see our two lovebirds learned they have yet another thing in common: the use of diaries!
(Wes Heely, Mercedes Jones, Finn Hudson, and six other people like this.)

Kurt Hummel: We're just friends!

Blaine Anderson: We're just friends!

Wes Heely: Jinx! Now you two have to do whatever I say for a whole day starting now. Confess your love to a certain person… you love. Status post it. Go!

Blaine Anderson I confess… I'm in love with Neil Patrick Harrison.
(Kurt Hummel likes this.)

Kurt Hummel: I love you.

Kurt Hummel: WAIT.

Kurt Hummel: NOT LIKE THAT.

Kurt Hummel: Wait…

Kurt Hummel is now offline.

(a/n) Oh snap! I mean, that's plausible, right? 'Cos I do that all the time. The saying 'I love you' when someone does something hilarious/super-cool, not the saying 'I love you' accidently to somebody I secretly do love. I'm too young to understand that fickle thing called love. :D /shot. I've been studying Shakespeare too much. I'm sorry to leave you on a cliffhanger like that! And I know FB doesn't actually post if your online or not, I just thought it'd be all dramatically awesome like that. ouo;;