Alright! The end! No more! (I promise.)

This one has references to the last chapter of HP and the RDG.

And I made this one longer. :)

Please read and review!

Of Perverts and Preceding Friends

Because Sakura can't live without her boys.

Sakura suddenly frowned as a hand found its way down to touch her ass.

Um, no.

Not happening.

Before she could do anything, though, Itachi already had the Kumo-nin dangling in the air by his throat. His Sharingan blazed as he forced a particularly vicious genjutsu upon the unfortunate (perverted) man.

"Itachi," Sakura reprimanded, placing a gentle hand on his wrist, guiding him to put the man down. When he didn't budge, she applied chakra.

He put the man down.

"This man is a Kumogakure ninja," she said sternly. "It's frowned upon to kill an allied village's shinobi." She abruptly turned and decked the shameful man. "Punching him in the face, however, is a much better approach."

He grunted, though his deadly glower never once left the now-unconscious man. Sakura sighed.

"Well, Kumo shouldn't be too mad that we knocked out the guy that was supposed to escort us to the border. I mean, it's not like we're gonna go ransack the Raikage's house or anything."

"Hn."

She smiled at him, attempting to distract him from murdering the offender.

"Mm, I think we should stop by Kirigakure on our way home."

His gaze snapped to hers. When her smile never wavered, he finally gave a sound of agreement in the back of his throat. "Very well. I suppose there is a certain bar you wish to drop in."

A grin twisted her lips.

.

.

.

"Rumor has is that a couple of Konoha-nin took down a psychotic mass-murderer in Kumogakure two days ago."

"What, really?"

"Yeah."

"Wow. How come Kumo needed Konoha-nin to take care of the guy?"

"Apparently they paid a couple high-class shinobi to come over and investigate the murders 'cause they couldn't figure out who was doing it."

"Needed a fresh set of eyes on the case, then?"

"Probably. Turns out, it was one of the Raikage's assistants."

"Seriously? !"

"I know, right?"

"Man…"

The bartender was only half-listening to the men's conversation.

"Yeah. And the two ninja they hired to do the job — they're a weird couple."

"Weird? How so?"

"Well, one of 'em is a girl that came from another village. And her hair — it's —"

"Excuse me, sir."

"Wha — oh, um, y-yes?"

He felt a pair of eyes burning into his back as he cleaned out a glass. Whoever the men were now talking to was watching him — probably knew he was listening in — and was most definitely a shinobi, if the chakra signature had anything to say about it. A second shinobi stood by the newcomer, but he didn't dare look.

"I'm looking for a bar by the ocean with a fish-man acting as bartender." He froze. "Know any around here like that?"

Slowly, painfully slowly, he turned his head and looked over his shoulder.

A pink-haired woman was leaning back against the bar, smiling straight at him. A man with long black hair stood behind her, amusement evident in his expression to anyone who'd been around him long enough to notice.

Like, say, Hoshigaki Kisame.

Then, a wide grin split across his face. He completely ignored the two men sitting at the bar that were staring at him blankly.

"Hey, Naiyou," he called, eyes never leaving the two shinobi before him. A barmaid padded up curiously, her brown hair pulled up in a high, curly ponytail.

"Sir?"

He never even looked at the woman. "Tell the customers the bar is closing for the night."

She frowned. "Why?"

He waved her off impatiently. "Just do it."

She huffed, stalking off to do as she was told. The two men he'd been listening to earlier slipped away nervously after placing money down for a tip.

"Hikaru, you're locking up tonight," he hollered to a dumbfounded flame-haired kid at the far end of the room before putting down the glass he'd been cleaning, walking out from behind the bar. "Sakura. Itachi." His grin widened, showing off an impressive row of shark-like teeth. "'Thought I'd never see you two again."

To his surprise, Sakura pulled him into a tight hug. She was smiling widely — much unlike how cold she'd been when she first joined the Akatsuki. "Hey, Kisame," she murmured, holding onto him for a long moment before pulling back. He patted her head somewhat awkwardly. "I was afraid I'd never see you again, too."

He gave a rough laugh. "Glad to know you missed me." He nodded to Itachi, exchanging the usual manly grunt before placing a large hand on her lower back to guide her forward. "Come on, kitten. I got something to show both of you."

His hand never left her back as he led them to the flight of stairs at the back of the bar. He, like the kunoichi, couldn't seem to bring himself to stop touching her — as if she'd disappear the second he let go. Her shoulder brushed against his side with every step, and she relished the familiar warmth he gave off. Itachi walked on her right, perfectly in step with her — a fact that Kisame noted in amusement.

It was wonderful. Absolutely, positively wonderful.

It was like coming home for the first time in years.

Now, she thought dimly, smile nearly faltering, if only —

"Kisame, who the hell —"

Before them appeared the one person she was truly afraid she'd never see again. She had always thought she might come visit Kisame, but him…

"…Sakura?"

She smiled warmly, eyes nearly crinkling closed. "Hey, Deidara."

Sakura wasn't sure which one of them moved first, but suddenly they were embracing each other as if their very lives depended upon it, smiling and laughing in relief. They couldn't let go. Fingers twisted into shirts, and arms tangled around waists.

"Kami," he breathed, eyes closed, cheek resting against the top of her head. "It's been a while, huh?"

She smiled into his neck, breathing in the familiar scent of him. "Two years," she agreed.

"Damn," Kisame mumbled, grinning and shaking his head incredulously. "I'm gonna need a drink for this. How 'bout it?"

"I'm staying sober tonight," Sakura instantly threw in.

"Same, yeah."

Itachi merely grunted.

.

.

.

"I'll go get another bottle," Sakura offered, laughing at the shark-nin's thrashed expression.

"Thanks, kitten," he mumbled, shifting to sit more comfortably and nearly falling in the process. Deidara snorted, rolling his eyes.

"You're gonna kill yourself with all this sake," he remarked.

The blue-skinned man blew him off. "I can handle my alcohol, kid."

He shook his head in amusement, eyes unconscious darting after Sakura as she disappeared into the small kitchen of the little home he and his fishy friend now occupied. His chest clenched. He had to talk to her. Sparing a glance at Itachi, who was sitting suspiciously still, he got up and followed her.

"Sakura."

She glanced over her shoulder as she fished around in a cabinet for a third bottle of sake. Catching his unreadable expression, she paused.

"What's wrong?"

His eyes flickered.

She swallowed.

"It never would have worked out between us, yeah."

"Listen, Sakura," he murmured, walking over to her slowly, nervously. "I—" He paused, seemingly searching for the right words. "Ever since the moment I met you, I've—"

"I know," she whispered, eyes trained on the floor. His breath halted. "I…I'm sorry."

He looked away, one hand running through the hair hanging in his face. "I should've told you before he—"

"I'm pregnant, Deidara."

He froze.

Slowly, eyes unbelievably wide, he turned to stare at her in shock. His mouth opened, but the words wouldn't come. She gazed at him sadly — but, he saw, glowing in her eyes was overwhelming happiness. It made his throat close up.

"He doesn't know," she continued quietly, fingers worrying the edges of her sleeves.

He didn't have to ask who "he" was.

"I'm…" She lowered her head nervously, shoulders slightly hunching. "I'm scared to tell him."

After a long, agonizing moment, he finally found his voice. "How long?" He winced at how scratchy it sounded.

She bit her lip. "Two weeks."

He leaned heavily against the door frame to steady himself, staring numbly at the fake tile floor.

"…you should tell him."

Her head shot up. She said nothing. A minute passed before he glanced at her.

Her eyes were closed. Tears were beginning to show themselves.

And she was smiling.

It was written all across her face. Joy. Excitement. Love.

It was the most beautiful smile he'd ever seen.

To his shock, he found himself slightly smiling back.

"Thank you."