Title: Greasemonkey

Rating: NC-17

Author: darkalbino

GUESS WHO HASN'T WRITTEN PORN IN LIKE A YEAR?

AND GUESS WHO FINALLY DID? :'D

LOLOLOL nuthing speshul =3=

Except that it's a giftuuu for the FABULOUS LavitaaColori from Y! and DA! she is rovery |D

Warnings: SasuNaruSasu, lemon hurrdurr mechanic!Naruto /glees

Disclaimer: blah blah i don't own it shut up

Greasemonkey

After three straight weeks of nothing but meetings, socials, and foreigners, Sasuke thought he deserved a break. Really. Business trips were a bitch. He thought he'd be allowed to have a smooth trip home, eat a ham and tomato sandwich, and then proceed - after three goddamn weeks of purely dick-to-hand contact - to fuck his boyfriend uninterrupted until they both passed out from sheer exhaustion.

Sasuke honestly thought he'd earned better than his fucking alarm not going off that morning, then rushing to the airport with his shit practically spilling out of his luggage and his shirt half-unbuttoned, barely tucked into wrinkled pants and black hair sticking up in every direction, only to find that his flight had been delayed anyway. He thought today, of all days, of all flights he'd ever been on, today wouldn't be the day the airline decided to lose his fucking luggage. He'd had to wait six hours to get it back, but he did find some consolation in making one of the employees cry from the utter rage that was boiling in his glare.

Sasuke thought today would be a good day.

But quite evidently, Sasuke thought wrong.

So he really shouldn't have been surprised when, driving home at one in the morning and grinding his teeth over his shitty day, his car decided to cough, sputter out, and die. Though Sasuke would swear, he would swear that that "cough" was really a poorly disguised laugh at his expense.

He took a moment to bang his head against the steering wheel, letting it rest there as his hand smacked around the door and grabbed the handle before shoving it open with much more force than necessary. With a groan, Sasuke dragged himself out of the car, breathing in the cool night air to try and relax as best he could before popping the hood of the vehicle.

A plume of steam puffed out over Sasuke's face, making him turn his head and wave it away with his hands. He frowned and leaned forward, dark eyes squinting as a smoldering heat rose into them. He stared at the clutter of machinery like it was the first time he'd ever seen a real engine in his life.

Probably because it was the first time he'd ever seen a real engine in his life.

"…"

What had he been expecting? A huge neon sign that said 'THIS IS BROKEN'? He had no idea what he was looking for.

Sasuke reached up and tapped his fingers thoughtfully against the hood, looking around the – of course – very much deserted 1 AM road he'd been driving down. Sighing, he let his arms fall away from the car, knowing there was only one person who would be willing to come out and – his cheeks brushed red with shame – help him at this hour.

Sasuke reached into his pocket and pulled his cellphone out, flipping it open and pressing speed-dial 1. Three rings and he heard the click of the phone being picked up, followed immediately by the click of it being hung up. His brow twitched and he redialed at least five times before finally getting a groggy voice as a response.

"Fuck s'this?"

"Naruto."

On the other end, Naruto still had his eyes closed, still half-asleep, though his brows furrowed in confusion. "No…m'Naruto," he mumbled.

Sasuke's hand smacked over his face. "No! Idiot! It's me!"

The yelling made Naruto jerk the phone away from his ear, and he rubbed his eyes open as he slowly brought it back. "Sasuke?" He yawned and patted the bed, feeling nothing but empty space beside him. "You're not back," he whined softly.

"Clearly. My car died, I need you to…" Sasuke bit the inside of his cheek, glancing off to his side. "Instruct me, on how to fix it, or…come out here and…" He looked around at the woods surrounding the empty road and grit his teeth. "There's no one else," he muttered.

Naruto had finally woken himself up enough to sit up, the sheets twisted around his spread legs as he sat on the bed with a huge grin on his lips. "What's wrong, Sasuke? Don't you know how to fix a car?"

"A lot more than the car is going to need fixing if you don't help me solve this."

Naruto stretched and leaned back against the headboard, wriggling his toes in amusement. "Ain't complainin' that your boyfriend's a mechanic now, eh bastard?" He pursed his lips and teased, "What kind of man doesn't know about cars?"

Sasuke's jaw tightened as the phone made a cracking sound in his grip. "The kind that makes a six-figure salary and fucks your insufferable mouth on a daily basis."

Naruto snorted. "Where are you?"

"I don't know, on a long road near 85th."

"Whelp," Naruto kicked off the sheets and climbed off their bed, pounding his chest once in a me-man-me-strong sort of way. "Once again, the awesome, dashing Naruto has to save his princess FagSauce!"

Sasuke cheeks flooded red, "You know damn well this is the first time anything like this has ever happened, you fucking moron! Shut your goddamn mouth! I'm the one always coming to save your sorry ass from all manner of –" Sasuke stopped abruptly, breathing heavily and glaring at nothing in particular in front of him, though in his head he was picturing a Naruto head bursting into flames. "Just get down here," he growled.

Naruto chuckled and smacked a kiss into the phone. "Heh, way ahead of you, baby."

x-X-0-X-x

It was easy to be pissed at Naruto over the phone.

It was a far more difficult to be pissed at him when he was right there, in his blue mechanic pants and tank top, elbow-deep in a car engine and looking every bit the oily, sweaty, stupid grease-monkey he was. The sight of Naruto grunting and reaching up to scratch his head, only to pause and laugh when he touched his bandana instead was so…stupidly cute it made Sasuke's dick harden almost immediately in his pants.

He hadn't fucked that idiot in weeks, so sue him for being a little more eager than usual.

"All right," Naruto slammed the car hood down and wiped his hands on his shirt, smiling up at the other man. "Try it."

Sasuke gave him a once over before stepping into the car, slipping his key in the ignition and with one turn, the engine roared to life and quieted back down to a smooth whirr. Sasuke's shoulders sagged in relief and he cut it back off, pushing himself out of the car and finding Naruto leaning against it with a raised brow and cocky half-grin on his face. "Purrin' like a Sasuke."

Sasuke crossed his arms, looking down his nose at him. "The expression is 'like a kitten'."

Naruto chuckled and shrugged one shoulder. "Like there's a difference." He held one hand out, fingers splayed, "Three-hundred."

Sasuke frowned. "S'cuse me?"

"Payment."

"…You're kidding."

"Do I look like I'm fuckin' kidding? I'm your boyfriend, not your labor slave."

Sasuke snorted. "Like there's a difference," he mocked.

Naruto glowered at him and wriggled his fingers, "Don't got all night."

For a moment, Sasuke simply stared at him, then his lips curled into a smirk, and he pushed Naruto's hand to the side. "Hn, I'm afraid I don't have any cash on me." He moved in front of Naruto, leaning one arm against car behind him as he brushed his lips over the corner of the blond's mouth. "Perhaps we can settle out some other form of payment."

A throaty laugh rumbled out of Naruto, "Really, bastard?" He quickly caught Sasuke's lower lip between his teeth, then just as quickly let it go. "You're gonna seduce me on your car, in the middle of nowhere at 3 AM?"

"Tch," Sasuke suddenly grabbed Naruto's arm, catching him off guard and twisting him around, smashing Naruto's cheek against the car door and trapping him there with his own body. He sighed against blond hair, relishing in the lustful glare Naruto sent back at him over his shoulder. Chuckling, he dragged his lips over a bronzed temple, catching a pinch of skin with his teeth and making Naruto wince. "I don't have to 'seduce' what's already mine," he husked.

Naruto grinned, his free hand sliding towards the car door to the backseat, "Cocky asshole." He ripped the door open, jerking Sasuke inside with him as he landed across the leather seats back-first.

"You're one to talk," Sasuke argued, unzipping his wrinkled pants as Naruto kicked off his own, but not before pulling out the half-empty bottle of lubricant he'd brought along for just such an occasion. It was Sasuke's first night back, after all.

The second Sasuke's erection sprang out, Naruto grabbed at it, grinning wider as Sasuke grunted and hunched over him. Naruto chuckled, smoothing out beads of pre-cum with his thumb and using his free arm to push himself up slightly, so he could bite at Sasuke's lips. "Heh, seems like Noodle here is pretty happy to see me."

"Fuck!" Sasuke grabbed the hand wrapped around his cock, glaring down at Naruto. "I'm sick of telling you to cut that shit out!"

Naruto laughed and bucked his hips in encouragement, coupled with one strong stroke over Sasuke's dick and beneath his pale fingers. He pushed forward to kiss him, breaking only for a breath before diving in again with a wet smack. "C'mon, bastard, I told you I don't have all night," he whispered.

Sasuke grabbed tan cheeks between his fingers, pushing them in and biting down on the full bottom lip that stuck out for him. "You better shut your goddamn mouth before I fuck it shut, dumbass." He snatched the lubricant out of Naruto's hand, flicking the cap and upturning it over his erection, groaning deeply as Naruto began stroking him steadily to spread the cool liquid. "Ahn," Sasuke bit the inside of his cheek, eyes narrowing at the other beneath him.

Naruto was flushed with lips still spread wide, the sheen of oil and sweat on his arms and cheeks making him all the more appealing. "Don't make promises you can't keep, Sasuke." He flopped back on the seat so he could reach up, shoving his thumb in Sasuke's mouth and earning a delicious moan as he pressed it down against the man's tongue and teeth. "Or I'm gonna feel really let down."

Sasuke scowled and suddenly shoved Naruto's hand right off his shaft. He wriggled back so he had one leg standing outside the car and his other with his knee pressed into the seat, tugging Naruto down with him. He poured the remaining lube over Naruto's ass, carelessly tossing it aside and hearing it clatter across the street as he rubbed his hand over glistening skin before smirking and sinking his thumb inside Naruto's hole.

"Mhn, fuck," Naruto bit the corner of his lip, still stroking his thumb over Sasuke's tongue as his other hand wandered down his shirt to wrap around his weeping erection.

Sasuke chuckled and bit down harshly on Naruto's thumb, a striking contrast to the steady massage of his own within the other man. It pulled slightly out of him, circling around the ring of muscle before dipping in again, stroking and stretching and Naruto was grinning and panting and forced his thumb on Sasuke's tongue just as rough as Sasuke had bitten him. "Fuck are you waiting for?" the blond breathed, his blue eyes scrunched up mischievously.

Sasuke's response was to grab Naruto's hips, jerk him in and sink inside him with a drawn out groan. He briefly wondered at the idea of some car passing by, seeing a fully dressed man from behind thrusting shallowly between tan legs, but quickly decided he couldn't give a fuck when Naruto clenched around him with a sharp curse. "Hah! Ah," Sasuke panted harshly, still relishing in the fact that after this whole fucked up day he finally got to do one damn thing he'd been craving throughout it, and fuck did it feel good.

Naruto grunted and suddenly curled his thumb inside Sasuke's mouth, pushing it below his tongue and teeth and using the leverage to yank Sasuke down nose-to-nose, his hips rolling in time with Sasuke's. "Is that it, baby?" Naruto growled. "Is that how much you missed me?"

Sasuke growled low in his throat, grabbing Naruto's wrist. He yanked the thumb out of his mouth and pulled out of him only to grip his hips again and force them over.

Naruto sputtered as he tried to right himself but a hand shoved against the back of his head forced his face into the seat, while Sasuke's other hand pushed one tan ass cheek up and out. "You're pushing it, idiot," he muttered, and then slammed inside of him, smirking as Naruto hollered into the cushion smothering his face.

Naruto managed to turn his head so Sasuke was pressing his cheek into the leather instead. He was breathing heavily between clenched teeth, hand still working over his own cock as he felt his bandana slipping off his head from each smack of Sasuke's hips against him. He closed his eyes and smiled wide, arching his back downward as Sasuke plunged again and again, moaning and filling him so desperately that Naruto was really at a loss to who needed it more. He reached back and grabbed Sasuke's arm, digging his nails into the straining muscles that kept him pinned. "Don't you fucking stop," he demanded.

And like a damn switch, Sasuke grinned and pulled out, flipping the other back over.

Naruto nearly slid right off the seat but held on by gripping the headrest, snarling down the length of his body at Sasuke between his legs. "The fuck asshole? I said don't stop! What the fuck!"

Sasuke chuckled and grabbed Naruto's erection, smearing its tip against his lips. "Close?" he teased. Sasuke pushed Naruto's thighs up, dragging his tongue between his ass cheeks in one long lick.

Naruto shuddered violently but managed to yell out, "YEAH I WAS FUCKING CLOSE!" The bandana that had been barely hanging from his hair finally dropped as his head fell back with a guttural moan, the warm, wet heat of Sasuke's mouth sliding down the length of his arousal. "God," he breathed, tangling his fingers in dark hair and bucking up. "S'better," he chided.

Sasuke's eyes fluttered open to glare at him but he did not stop moving, head steadily bobbing up and down as he watched Naruto sternly while stroking his own cock, still slick from the lubricant. He dragged his tongue over every inch of warm flesh he could touch, allowing his fingers to work over the bits he couldn't reach.

Dark strands of hair brushed over Naruto's fingers as he gripped them tighter, mouth falling open in a deep groan as Sasuke sucked his cheeks hollow and Naruto's thighs quivered in release, shooting jet after jet of semen that Sasuke brought with him, dragging his lips up the spent shaft.

Naruto's lips tilted in a grin as Sasuke crawled up his body, but he frowned slightly when Sasuke smirked while looming over him. Wordlessly, Sasuke's lips parted and drips of Naruto's own cum dribbled onto his cheek and the corner of his mouth. He narrowed his eyes at Sasuke, clearly not amused.

Sasuke simply chuckled, dark eyes flickering over black oil droplets on the other man's cheeks, complementing the new streaks of white. "You're dirty," he said.

Naruto snorted and smiled again, using his thumb to swipe a bit of oil and cum off his face and reaching up to wipe it off on Sasuke's cheek. He let his arm flop back over his head, "You too."

-End-

derp.

i love this naruto.

i want to do him.

/jealous of Sasuke B|