I CAN EXPLAIN, SO PLEASE DON'T GO THROWING ROCKS AT ME!

*Ahem* My friend, the one who's beta'ing Future in my Hands, bribed me to do this, a StockingxIzaya fanfic. Or she won't beta for me anymore. Needless to say, I had to type this up.

I actually had fun, and I plan on doing this gradually. I had fun typing up Stocking's character. I tried to make her as much of a bitch, and child she is.

By the way, I self-beta'd this, so if you see any mistakes, just point them out to me.~

PS. I'm rating this M, because of Stockings use of language.

Disclaimer: I do not own Durarara!, or P&S.

Stocking wasn't one to get annoyed that quickly. Unless her sister did something idiotic, or someone was just being really annoying. What really got on her nerves this time however was that someone randomly called her, and told her to meet him at this sushi place at ten o'clock AM.

It was now ten fifteen o'clock AM. And she was starving. Tapping her foot in frustration, Stocking finally saw someone sitting down in her table. He had a tacky brown coat, with tan fur trimming, messy black hair, and weird red eyes. Stocking guessed that he had contacts, bad ones at that.

"Your late, dumbass." Stocking said, with an annoyed tint to her voice.

"Sorry. My assistant asked me trio file some papers!" The man said, smiling.

'He has such a fake smile. Uragh.' Stocking crossed her legs together, and sipped her tea. Adding extra sugar as she felt the bitterness go down her throat. "What did you call me out here for, exactly? I don't even know your name, yet somehow you know mine."

"Orihara Izaya, you can just call me-"

"Dumbass is your new name, dumbass." Stocking said, cutting Izaya off. She honestly didn't want to spend any more of her precious time with this 'Izaya' guy. She had important 'take-over-the-world' business to attend to.

Still smiling, Izaya ordered Simon's special ice cream sushi for Stocking and ootroo for himself. "Anarchy Stocking, how about we team up and take over the world together?"

Blinking, Stocking sighed. This dumbass really wasan idiot. "No thanks, dumbass. I'm fine on my own."

"Really now? Do you know the names of everyone powerful in Earth? Do you know their weaknesses, and strengths?" Izaya said, almost sounding like he knew what Stocking was going to say.

Rising one of her eye-brows slowly, Stocking took another sip of her tea. "So, what your saying is; that you know everyone and anyone's weaknesses?"

"Not everyone's, just the really important people's weaknesses and strengths." Izaya swung his chair back and forth, clearly getting worked up. "I know that your biggest strength is your quick mouth, and stockings. Your weakness is your sister, Panty. You guys can't get along, right?"

Slamming down her tea, Stocking stood up and leaned over the table, right in Izaya's face. "What're you exactly, Izaya?"

"A simple informant, that's all." Izaya said, smirking. "You may want to sit back down; Simon gets mad if he sees two people dangerously close."

Huffing, Stocking sat back down, and crossed her arms. 'I have to admit, he's good. He can read a person, that's a rare trait for humans. I can see why he's an informant.'"I accept. Just make sure you don't drag me down, dumbass."

"I won't, I promise." Izaya said.

-A few months later-

Stocking and Izaya quickly became Tokyo's biggest trouble makers after a few months. Stocking wouldn't admit it, but she was having fun. Izaya was the opposite, and did admit that he was having fun making humans freak out, seeing their reactions with Stocking.

"Ohhh, I know. I haven't introduced you to one of my favorite monstersever!" Izaya said, after he and Stocking made a fifty-year-old man go home crying because he was a looser who never kissed a woman.

"Who, Izaya?" Stocking asked, her gaze fixed on playing with her stuffed cat, Honekoneko. Over the past few months, Stocking decided to just call Izaya by his first name. It still sounded rude, to her at least.

"Heiwajima Shizuo. You can call him 'Shizzy-Chan', if you'd like, Stocking-Chan!" Izaya sounded really ecstatic, and angry just saying Shizuo's name. She figured that they didn't get along. "Ohhh, I think I see him! There he is!"

Izaya pointed at a tall man, with messy blonde hair, and with a scowl on his face. He looked like someone that Panty would fall head-over heels over. "I'm going to go and talk to him, Izaya. Don't come with me." Stocking side, giving Izaya Honekoneko.

Tapping Shizuo's shoulder, Stocking tried to put her annoyed face on. This wasn't that hard to do. "Move it, cherry boy." Stocking didn't know if he reallywas a virgin, but if Izaya called him a monster, he must be.

Shizuo's left eyebrow twitched at Stockings comment, but he kept his anger in check. He couldn't harm a girl, even if she was a bitch. "Girl, please don't call me that." Shizuo got a good look at Stocking. Long blue hair, with pink highlights. A Gothic-Lolita dress, with black and blue stockings, and an annoyed looking face. Certainly a weird style to see in Ikeburuko.

"Call you what, a cherry boy?" Stocking suddenly started giggling. "Don't tell me that you actually are a cherry boy?" Stocking had a teasing tone in her voice. She was having extra fun with Shizuo. His expressions were priceless!

Now his hands were twitching. "Girl, who're you, exactly? You don't go around saying that to random people that you don't know anything about."

"Stocking. Anarchy Stocking. I'm a higher being then you, so I'd watch your mouth, cherry boy." Stocking said, now laughing uncontrollably.

That was it. Shizuo stopped being a gentleman, and picked up a nearby vending machine. Stocking jumped back, and quickly took off one of her stockings. Instead of throwing the vending machine, instead Shizuo stared at Stocking, obviously dumbfounded.

"What? You've never seen a girl take off her stockings before? Poor, poor, Shizzy-Chan. You need to take more women out on dates!" Izaya said, coming out of hiding. He stood near Stocking, smirking, though it was hard to take him seriously with a stuffed cat in his arm.

Shizuo now threw the vending machine at Izaya, only for it to be cut in half by Stockings sword. Now Stocking was the one smirking, and it was getting on Shizuo's nerves. The fact that she's protecting that flea also got on his nerves.

"I told you that I could handle this myself, dumbass." Stocking said, pointing her sword in Izaya's face. He didn't even flinch.

"I like teasing Shizzy-Chan too much, Stocking-Chan!" Izaya said, smiling. Stocking dubbed it 'the cheesiest smile ever'.

"Shut up you flea!" Shizuo said, flinging a mailbox at Izaya, only for it to but cut in half by Stocking again.

Annoyance tinged in Stockings face. She was fed up with this annoying cherry boy. Even his voice annoyed her. Taking off her other stocking quickly, Stocking made her move and pined Shizuo to a nearby brick wall, putting both of her swords in the palms of his hands. He didn't even blink once as she made her move.

"You annoy me too much, cherry boy." Stocking said, her eyes beginning to become crazier than they already were. Shizuo was beginning to think that this girl was cracked in the head.

Instead of doing more damage, Stocking pulled out her two swords and walked back over to Izaya, taking Honekoneko in the process.

Izaya sure was having fun with Stocking after all. Despite her not being one of his precious humans.

Namie got on Stockings nerves. Their attitudes clashed at times, and they often fought about a bunch of stuff. Mostly stuff about Naime's 'sick love for her little brother', as Stocking put it. Izaya was being the usual troll that he was, and sat back while watching Stocking and Namie fight it out. Verbally, of course.

"… Hey, slut, where's the chocolate pudding?" Naime said, looking through the small refrigerator that Izaya kept.

"I ate it all, bitch." Stocking said eating her newly bought double chocolate cheesecake.

Slamming the refrigerator door shut, Namie stomped over to Stocking. "Then it's only fair that you share your chocolate cheesecake with me, slut."

"Just try me, bitch." Stocking said, pointing her fork at Namie.

That was it. Namie grabbed Stockings dress collar, and pulled her to the ground, ripping part of her dress in the process. Stocking immediately started ripping Naime's shirt in return. "You bitch, this dress was one-hundred and seventy dollars!"

By the time Izaya came home from his usual trolling spree, Stocking and Namie were only in their underwear. Though, Namie had to put her hand over her chest to keep her bra from falling down.

"Oops, sorry. I didn't know you two were changing!" Izaya said, slamming the door shut.

"We weren't changing, Izaya, we were having a sexy cat-fight." Stocking said, in a sarcastic voice, snickering a little in the process. Stocking wanted to see Izaya's expression when she finally ripped off all of Namie's clothes.

"I'd rather not get a nose-bleed, Stocking-Chan." Izaya said. His face was already a deep shade of red, but he'd rather not mention that to Stocking. She'd rip him a new one.

"Your loss!" Stocking said, ripping what little Namie had left of her bra.