Authors Notes: For this, let us just pretend that JOhn and Helen werent together until shortly after they injected themselves with the source blood. And Nikola got devampes before Ashley died. These are a bunch of fics that I put together. The songs they are based on are:

-Children of the Night by Blutengel

-Crawling by Linkin Park

-The sharpest lives by My Chemical Romance

-Beauty and Delight by Blutengel

-Right here in my arms by H.I.M

-Call me when you're sober by Evanescence

-All falls apart by Michael Weatherly (yes the actor off NCIS who plays DiNozzo)

-Last Night by Skillet

I don't own Sanctuary nor do I own these songs.

1887-Oxford

Nikola flicked through the book, trying to ignore his thirst for her blood. The others of the five had left for home, except Nikola and Helen who had stayed back, eager to catch up on some research.

Helen sat across the room, stuck in the medical journal she was reading. Every now and again she would look over at him, admiring his lovely blue eyes, his pale skin, though not pale enough to be considered odd. She was attracted to him, there was no doubt about that, but she wasn't sure if it was because of him being a vampire, or of him being him.

He was itching to lean over to her, and kiss her, to taste her blood. He knew he shouldn't…but she was just to damn irresistible. He got to his feet and was at her side in a moment. He leant down, kissing her right behind the ear. He felt her shiver, but she didn't push him away, instead captured his lips in a kiss.

He took her hand with a smile, and lead her to the bedroom.

"Close your eyes Helen." Nikola said softly, laying her on the bed, and with a curious glance, she did.

Then she felt his cool lips to her neck, his hands wondering across her stomach.

She arched up into his touch.

"Is this real?" She pondered, basking in the beauty of this moment.

"Yes my love. Very real." Nikola chuckled. "We can live forever together if you let me. Beauty lives forever, Helen. And I want to see beauty every day when I awaken." He told her, whispering into her ear.

All she could do was nod at his heartfelt words. She heard the meaning in his voice.

Seeing them together, it felt as if he was trapped inside is body. Helen was engaged to John and it felt like the wounds that would never heal.

He felt so torn, hurt. He had loved her. His hurt turned into delusions, and soon, he was consumed in fantasies, not knowing what was real or fake. He struggled to find himself, feeling as if he was right there, under the skin but he couldn't get there.

Nikola knew it was getting worse, and using the rest of his control, he ran. He could fake a smile, but he couldn't tell if this was real anymore. He didn't want it to be.

He loved her, that's why he had to let her go. He was no longer the cheeky young scientist from Serbia. He was grown up now, and he knew he couldn't have her. He couldn't have Helen Magnus, because she didn't want him. She had promised Nikola that forever it would always be just the two of them, and then she let John in, and everything had fallen apart.

What Helen got was John, which was what she wanted, but Nikola couldn't help but wonder if what she wanted was wrong. All of those flirting sessions, all those romantic gestures meant nothing to her. Nikola was breaking as he watched her with John. It all fell apart.

He had done this before. He would turn up at the Sanctuary drunk, and Big guy would have to carry him to the couch, where he passed out. Helen would always cure him back to sobriety and Nikola would regret it in the morning. This time was no different. He woke up, Helen pressing a damp cloth to his head.

"Why do you do this to yourself, Nikola?"

"Because I can't have you. I need to take that pain away. Pleases take the pain away, Helen." He admitted. Maybe he was a little drunk still, but Helen sat back shocked at his forwardness then she nodded slowly.

"Okay." She kissed him softly, then walked away smiling.

Helen pushed Nikola out the door, her heart hurting, but she knew she had to take a stand. He had started drinking again, confessing his ever lasting love for her, but it wasnt enough.

"I don't want you like this Nikola. If you love me, come back when you are sober. Until then, decide what you want to do." She shut the door, leaning back against it, and Will walked over to her, laying a hand on her arm.

"I am fine, Will.' She said softly, but he shook his head.

"Tesla was a bastard. It isn't every day that he turns up drunk and tries to sleep with you…forcefully." Helen winced at the last word, absently rubbing her arm where Nikola had grabbed, trying to force himself onto her.

"If he wants me, he knows where I am."

He came back, because he loved her. It took him 3 months, but he finally came back, and when he did, Helen had been so happy, she could barely keep it in. BUt she hadn't shown it. She would never have shown it. But Nikola knew that she was happy. She proved it to him in words and in actions.

Helen smiled at Nikola, as he held the ring out to her.

"Yes." SHe whispered, tears springing to her eyes. They stood on the roof, the city glowing below them.

"You'll never be alone Helen. I promise you." He said slipping the ring onto her finger.

Nikola took her in his arms, promising never to let her go. If he could only let John see this, the two of them in love, her clinging to him as she cried with happiness. Neither wanted to move but at that moment her radio crackled with Big Guys voice, and they tore apart, with a smile.

Nikola opened the door of their room to Helen with tears spilling down her cheeks. Ashley had just died, and trying to deal with his grief, Nikola told Helen that he would meet her in their room.

"I just came to say goodbye." She sniffled, collapsing into his arms, and that is when he saw it. The cuts on her arms where she had tried and failed to end her life.

"Helen…"

"I want to be with her, Nikola."

"I don't want to be without you, Helen." He said quietly, kissing her forehead.

"Then join me. Die with me." She pleaded. He looked in her eyes, and could tell that she was serious. He would do anything for her, even if that meant die for her. Will would take care of the Sanctuary and he would be fine doing it.

"Okay." And then Nikola wrapped his long slender arms around her, moving silently over to the window, and never let go, even when they hit the pavement.

FIN

End notes: I fell really bad about killing them off! :( Any type of review is welcome, whether it be a bad or good review! It helps me improve.