Chapter 4

"Klaus!" Tiff cried. Klaus laughed evilly and clapped his fins together.

"Yes it is I who did it!" He said. "The fish, Klaus Heissler! I'm the culprit behind all of this; very wundabar work." He stopped clapping and laughed his evil German laugh once more.

"Bad fish!" Tiff yelled at him. Klaus stopped laughing. "Kidnapping is illegal wherever you go; don't you know that? I should report you for this." Klaus then burst out crying.

"I just wanted friends!" He sobbed, fins over eyes. Tiff looked confused.

"You just wanted friends?"

"Yes; that's all! I never meant to hurt anyone!" Tiff looked angry again.

"Well you did!" She snapped. "You hurt cartoons' hearts because now the ones they love are missing. If all you wanted are friends, you could have just asked us; we would gladly have been your friends." Klaus removed his fins from his eyes.

"It's not easy as it sounds." He sniffed. Tiff looked confused again.

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"How do I know you won't turn out to be rotten liars like my American family back home?"

"So this is what this is about! Oh Klaus, we would never treat you like that; never; you got to believe that!"

"Is he talking about us?" Stan asked. Roger shrugged.

"Beats me!" He said, and then drank more of his wine. Tiff looked mad and snatched Roger's wine bottle away. "Hey missy! That's my wine; give it back! You're making me angry, and you don't want to see me when I'm angry!"

"Of course he's talking about you! You are always mean to him and you don't respect him at all! Why?! He's a man trapped in a goldfish's body for pete's sake! Why can't you ever be nice to him?"

"Shut up missy!" Roger snatched the wine bottle back. "He's mean to us! We're an adult cartoon, we have to be mean! It what our creators told us to do; be mean to the fish!" He drank some more. Tiff scowled.

"I still say it's not right."

"I say, we do our show our way, and your kid cartoons do it your way, okay?" Again, he drank.

"You're going to get awfully high with that stuff."

"Yeah." Klaus agreed. "But he's Roger, he doesn't care. Let him be." Tiff then changed the subject.

"So, how did you manage to do all of this stuff? It must have been hard, considering you're a fish."

"Glad you asked; back story time!" He began his story.

"Well, before we came here, I snuck into CIA headquarters to get the sleeping gas late at night when everyone was home in their beds."

"So, that is how the sleeping gas got in the bathroom!"

"Exactly! It was meant for Count Pichu, but Stan got in the way!"

"So," Stan interupped. "If I didn't have to go to the bathroom, I wouldn't have been kidnapped?"

"Yeah."

"Curse me and my bladder." Klaus was going to continue when Tiff asked another question.

"How did you managed to get Stan down here? He's heavy; you have to have a lot of muscles to pull someone like him."

"I was very fortunate that the couch he was laying on had wheels."

"Wait a minute; it had wheels?"

"I know, very strange. I think the Count put them on there to have fun, have races in it and stuff. Maybe he put wheels on all the couches in his mansion, I don't know. So, when Stan was down here, I pushed the couch back into it exact position before anyone noticed it was gone."

"And then they noticed Stan missing!"

"Right, so anyways, Kitty was going to call the police, and I panicked, I had to do something. I couldn't have the police here; it'll be too risky. So I took Stan's grappling hook from his pocket and then I…"

"So, that is why my pocket feels empty besides my wallet!" Stan realized. "You took my grappling hook! That cost me money Klaus; I'm going to kill you for this!"

"OOOh Stan, watch your language. They're kid cartoons here, and we signed the contract remember? And anyways, shut up, so I can finish my story."

"Okay."

"So anyways, when we went upstairs for bed, I followed Kitty on the balcony and I threw a Smith house vase at her."

"So, you used our vase from our house? That cost a fortune; Francine will be furious. Why when I get out of here I'm going to mur…"

"Interrupting again Stan!"

"Sorry, continue. Wait, why am I saying sorry? Klaus should be saying sorry to us for kidnapping us and keeping us prisoners down here!" He looked at Klaus' glare. "Just go with it Stan, just go with it."

"So, anyways, I knocked her out cold. Unfortunately, I left tracks in the snow from my cup. I was going to brush it away, when I heard you all coming. I had to act fast, so I bolted out of there. I hid her in the corner, and then when we went to bed, I hid her in here with the help of Stan's grappling hook. When I came back up, I saw that Timmy and Cosmo had left their door open. I saw the baby and thought, sure why not? Babies are fun to play with! So I went through Timmy's suitcase and whipped out a soccer ball. I drew Poof's face on the top with Poof's markers, then I replaced Poof with the ball. I went downstairs and hid him with the others. I then went to our room to sleep for the night."

"The next morning, I kidnapped Perry by typing a message on his watch, before we searched, and made it sound like it was from his boss instead of me. I then stole a bacon from the kitchen, found some string, and attached the bacon to the string, That is how I lured Kirby, but unfortunately, Private came into the scene. I had to act fast, so I snatched him up. I then took Count Pichu's money so I have all the money I need to get out of this stupid fish body and turn human again. I also took Kirby, and Count Pichu himself. And that's my story."

"How did you expect to get away with all of this?" Tiff asked. "Kidnapping cartoons, tying them up in the basement, that's not a way to make friends." Klaus realized she was right.

"Oh crap!" He said. "I did not think this through."

"You still did a bad thing." Klaus looked ashamed.

"I know, but all I wanted was attention. I don't know what I was thinking." Kirby felt sorry, and went to comfort the sad fish. Klaus smiled at the star warrior.

"You forgive me no matter what, don't you Kirby?"

"Poyo!"

"Thanks Kirby," He wiped his tear away from his eye with his fin. "You're a true friend."

"Poyo!"

"You know you have to say you're sorry." Tiff spoke. "Everyone is real worried."

"I know." Then they all heard gasps. They all looked at up. All the other cartoons were at the entrance; they all ran down and untied their love ones. Perry pulled his arm out, and took off his hat, going in his mindless state before Phineas and Isabella saw him. The kids untied him. Phineas hugged his pet.

"MAMA; DADA!" Poof shouted, hugging his parents once he was free. His parents and Timmy hugged him back.

"Who did this to you Perry?" Phineas asked, once he was done hugging his pet. "Who's the culprit behind all of this?" Perry just chattered and just stayed in his clueless state. The boy hugged him again. "Well, at least you're safe; that's all that matters." Isabella smiled as the boy hugged his pet.

"Oh Kitty!" Dudley said, hugging her. "I missed you so much! The agency wouldn't be the same without you!" Kitty smiled, and hugged him back.

"And I missed you Dudley." She said, patting her partner's back. "I missed you."

"Awww!" Grimer admired the sight. "Isn't this lovely? All of the cartoons reunited at last."

"It sure is." Charmander told him. "But we still don't know who did it."

"Oh right, now who could've done this; who?" The pokemon pondered about this.

"So," Ms. Gummle said to her boss. "I'm glad you're safe. Are you all right?"

"Yes I'm all right." The rich Pichu admitted. "And guess what? My money's all right too!" He then saw his sectary's glare. "But most importantly, I'm all right." Ms. Gummle smiled.

"Cousims!" Pichu cried. He ran up to hug his cousin. His cousin hugged him back.

"I can't believe I'm saying this," Count Pichu said. "But I'm glad to see you again Pichu. I missed your annoying and idiotic ways."

"Isn't this great Pat?" SpongeBob asked his friend. "All of us together at last."

"Yeah." Patrick said, and then looked confused. "Wait, what are we talking about?"

"Glad to have you back soldier." Skipper said. "It's been chaos without you."

"Well, it's kind of great to be back sir." Private told him.

Klaus sighed, and got ready for the apology. He faced the other cartoons.

"Look," He started. "I know you're mad at me, and probably all hate me for what I've done. But I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm used to everyone hating me, so I'm sorr..."

"It's Roger!" Tuff shouted, pointing at him. "I knew he was behind this!"

"Drinking makes you do crazy stuff." Kowalski explained. "Which is why it's illegal for humans and cartoons under 21. It's probably best that way too. Drinking is risky; you never know what drinking too much can do to you. It may one day end your life, so readers, if you're under 21 in the US, and if you're smart, we advise you not to do it!"

"Well said Kowalski." Skipper told him. He paid his attention back on Roger. "Men, get him!" The penguins all but Private, springed into action, and attacked Roger, pinning him to the ground.

"No!" Roger complained. "I didn't do it! Yes, I have a major problem with alcohol, but I swear I didn't do it! It was the fish!"

"He's telling the truth." Private told them. "It was Klaus that did this."

"Private," Skipper scolded him. "Don't get into this. You're obviously delirious with shock. We got this all under control."

"But…" Skipper ignored him, and looked at Roger.

"We don't believe you one bit! The fish couldn't have done it; it'll be too hard for him. You're coming with us!" They started to drag him away. Roger held tightly to his wine bottle.

"No!" He cried. "I'm telling you; it was the fish! He…zzz." He fell fast asleep.

"Roger's telling the truth." Stan said. "It was Klaus."

All the other cartoons tried to argue it was Klaus too as they went upstairs with their loved ones, but nobody believed them.

Perry wished he could talk. He felt sorry for Roger. He also felt bad for Klaus even through what he did was wrong. He bet the O.W.C.A would help him turn back into a human. Adult cartoons can be such jerks. He thought to himself. He smiled up to his owner. Which is why, I'm glad I'm in a kid cartoon with my two lovable kid owners. He snuggled close to Phineas. Phineas patted him as they all continued up the corridor.

"Well, that was easy." Klaus concluded. "They all think its Roger instead of me. Mein job here is done."

"No!" Tiff shouted at him. "You're going to say you're sorry and that is final!"

"But, they think its Roger. Let him take the blame, he's been mean to me too many times; this is my revenge." Tiff got into the fish's face. Klaus looked up into her eyes, and gulped, afraid.

"You're going to say sorry rather you like it or not!" She yelled. "Look, you shouldn't be mean to someone else because they were mean to you, plus it wrong to blame people on crimes they didn't do. Don't you see? If you fight fire with fire, all you're going to get is a bigger fire."

"Wundarbar!" Klaus said. "It's the moral of the story!" Tiff huffed madly, and shouted in his face.

"FOCUS AND YOU BETTER SAY YOU'RE SORRY!"

"Okay, okay I'll do it. Geez, you are so commanding. You are like the author's English co-teacher, when you get angry; it's not a pretty sight." Tiff smiled.

"Come," she said. "I'll help you upstairs." With that, Tiff offered her palm. Klaus jumped on. The two went upstairs.

"Guys!" Tiff shouted once they were up. The other cartoons looked at her. "Klaus has something to say."

"No I don't." Klaus lied. "I have nothing to say. Roger did this; he was drunk with power. He's the one!"

"Tell them!" Tiff whispered angrily to Klaus. He put him down. Klaus hesitated, and grinned at the cartoons nervously. He played with his fins.

"Um…the weather's clearing up. Looks like we can go home tomorrow as planned. Isn't that just wundarbar?" The cartoons glared at him. "No? Then how about, I live with one of you and your family in your universe since mine is rotten, and doesn't care for me? Huh; anybody? How about it?" Tiff nudged him.

"The truth!" She said. Klaus sighed.

"This is not easy for me." He looked up at the cartoons. "I did it." The cartoons that didn't disappear gasped.

"I'm sorry. I just wanted attention; I should've asked before I took your loved ones away from you. I know what I did was wrong; can you ever forgive me?"

"Awww!" Rico admired, speaking for the first time. Private looked at him.

"You spoke your first word in this entire story. Congratulations I guess." He looked back at Klaus.

"You need permission to take away our love ones?" Count Pichu asked, and then narrowed his eyes. "No! What is wrong with you? We aren't going to do that, no, are you crazy? Why are you being such a jerk?" Klaus sighed before he answered.

"Believe me," He said. "Everyone on our show are jerks, not just me. We're an adult cartoon aimed towards adults. That's just how we roll. So, do you forgive me, or not?"

"I suppose I could overlook this assault and abduction. If you recompensate me for what I have had to endure." Klaus gasped.

"I don't have money." He then pointed a mean fin at the count. "You have enough as it is, don't you think?" The count laughed.

"Enough? Oh Ms. Gummle, do you hear that? He thinks we have enough!" The count continued laughing. Mrs. Gummle smiled. The count stopped laughing.

"Look fish." He told him. "When you're me; nothing is enough! You can't have too much dough, that's my motto."

"Fine. Can you just invest some of your money to the CIA; just enough to convince them to turn me back into a human?" The count just laughed again.

"Fraid not, if I do that my money would miss me, and I'll miss my money. Besides, the CIA might steal my money and not do it. You are in an adult cartoon after all. So, I'm afraid you're stuck as a fish."

"Figures." The fish sighed sadly. "Even a kid cartoon can't change me back." He then cried. "Why does everybody hate me?" Tiff comforted him.

"Oh, will you quit being so melodramatic already, Klaus!" Stan demanded, getting fed up with the whining. "Do you think I would have invited you along on this trip if I didn't care about you! And Roger cares about you too, or he wouldn't have carried you around everywhere! So stop feeling so sorry for yourself already!"

"Oh!" Klaus sighed, getting all teary-eyed. "You do care!"

"Yes, yes, everyone's all happy and makes up. However," Count Pichu added. "Since you did kidnap our loved ones, and ruined my weekend plans, you'll have to pay the price." Klaus looked at him, confused.

"Isn't being trapped in a fish body punishment enough? Can't you see I'm already suffering as it is?"

"Fish or not, you have to take the punishment no matter what."

"Fine, what is it?" Count Pichu did a mischievious grin.

The next morning at the dining room, everyone (Roger was now awake and sober) had to wear fancy clothes at the table for their last meal at the manor. The breakfast contained rolls, cinnamon rolls, pancakes, and waffles. Everyone ate their meal.

After breakfast, everyone changed, and went into the game room, the Arcade, or the indoor pool, all except Klaus who had to do his punishment in the wine cellar.

He had to clean all the wine bottles until they were sparkly clean. He was about finished when Roger came down.

"Hey fish! Where's my…" He was headed towards a wine puddle.

"Look out!" Klaus warned. Too late, the alien slipped in the puddle, causing all the bottles to crash onto the ground.

"Uh oh spaghetti O's!" He then stood up, and dusted himself off. "Good luck explaining this to the count, fish!" He then ran upstairs. Klaus sighed.

"I hate my life."

"Well, cartoons," Count Pichu spoke when all the guests had their winter gear on. Roger had a wine bottle in his hand from the cellar. "Even though nearly all of my plans were ruined," He glared at Klaus. Klaus smiled guilty and waved at him. The Count looked back at the cartoons.

"I hope you all enjoyed your time here in my wonderful estate." Everyone (except Perry) clapped. Perry just chattered. Count Pichu looked at his secretary.

"Do you have anything to add, Ms. Gummle?" He asked.

"Have a good time everyone!" She said. "Be careful getting home; the roads are still bad from the snowstorm; bye!"

"Cheerio!" Count Pichu waved as everyone exited the building. Roger offered his free hand to Klaus, and the fish jumped on for the ride. Roger walked out with everybody else.

"Bye!" Private waved. "Have a jolly time!"

"Bye!" Rico waved. All of them waved goodbye at the disembarking cartoons.

"If I'm going to have another party in my mansion," The Count said to his sectary. "Let's remember not to invite anyone from American Dad. I know that Klaus said he was sorry, but he's an adult cartoon; they can't be trusted, especially the alien."

"You know sir," Ms. Gummle told him. "Roger has one of your wine bottles." The Count stopped waving and looked mad.

"Oh he does, does he? Well, not for long!" With that, the Count ran out of the building as she and the penguins kept waving goodbye.

Stan opened the car door for Roger and Klaus. They were about to climb in when the Count snatched his wine bottle back from Roger. He then ran off.

Roger growled. They looked in his direction. Roger was about to go after him when Stan stood in his way, shook his head, and pointed at the open door.

Roger huffed madly and got in. Stan closed the door behind them and got in the driver's side.

Once all buckled, the car zoomed off heading back to Langley Falls, Virginia.

"Hey Mom!" Phineas greeted as he, Perry, and Isabella got in his mom's car. Phineas closed the car door behind them and the kids sat in their seats.

"Hi kids!" She said back. "Did you have a great time?"

"Terrific Mom!" Phineas told her. The kids buckled in. Perry snuggled on the floor to take a nap.

"What did you do?"

"We helped solve a crime!" The boy explained.

"Really?" Phineas nodded.

"Yep!"

Linda put the keys in the ignition, and they started to drive.

"Grimer and Charmander put on their detective costumes, and turned into Grimsby and Charlock Holmes!"

"What was the crime?" She drove out of the parking lot, and they drove back to Dansville.

Phineas told his mother everything that happened during the drive. Although the weekend wasn't what Count Pichu had planned; the boy was happy anyway that he saw cartoons that weren't from his universe, interacted with them, and solved a mystery with them. It was a very exciting eventful weekend.

Note: Special thanks to my brother who took his time to help me with this story.