It started as another Monday morning in South Park Elementary School and the inside of the school had changed slightly over the weekend. He hates it so much as it is with all the ordering about by teachers who think they can disobey their own rules and walk all over them and all the stupid sixth graders and other kids who got on his nerves.

A few things you should know about Eric Cartman. Number one he thinks he is ruler of all things awesome, two he hates school and three this week would totally suck.

There were these weird posters up everywhere and the corridors were decorated with stupid banners saying "Friendship week" in bright bold letters, the kids were looking at them with confusion, unimpressed at the school's efforts of promoting what was going to happen this week.

Cartman walked in with Stan, Kenny and Kyle after the bus dropped them off when they noticed everyone looking at these stupid posters wondering what the hell was going on and they began to do the same.

"Dude, what is all this?" Kyle questioned as they walked to class.

"I don't know lets check it out." Stan replied and walked forward to a bright yellow poster hanging on the wall. It read:

Friendship Week! All this week it's time to prove just how close we all are!

This week is going to be filled with FUN FUN FUN

Everyone looked at it skeptically and at first Cartman didn't know if they were trying to decide whether or not it was a good thing. To him this looked like a pile of school's normal boring crap.

"Are you kiddin?" He said with a snort of laughter.

The rest were about to reply with their opinions when Mr. Mackay the school councilor showed up.

"Good morning boys, I see you're taking an interest to the school's participation of friendship week, M'ckay."

The four rolled their eyes and groaned but turned to face him with smiles; he is beaming at them again like an idiot.

"How come we've never heard of this before dude?" Stan asked ignoring his stupid grin.

"Well it's an exciting new project for children of your age to learn about the fun of friendship and teamwork! Mr. Garrison will explain it more to you in class M'ckay."

That made it official. This week would totally suck ass. Whenever a teacher describes an activity as fun its always going to some museum or planetarium ()

"It will be fun! Now get to class quickly before you miss the excitement M'ckay"

"Oh, weak." Cartman sighed as they all reluctantly make their way to class.

In class Mr. Garrison was not showing the excitement Mr. Mackay was talking about as his head was leaning on his hand and his eyes were buried into a magazine and everyone was still muttering to each other trying to make sense of the whole thing.

The boys took their seats in their usual places just as Mr. Garrison (as much as he didn't want to) decided to tell them what was going on.

"Alright children settle down. Now as you all know this week is friendship week. During this week you will learn about the enjoyment and benefits of friendship." Mr. Garrison's face was expressionless and spoke like someone has planted the words in his mouth.

Cartman looked to Kenny who was now doing something on his phone probably a game or something and then he looked to Stan and Kahl who were still staring at Mr. Garrison with blank faces. Knowing Kyle he secretly loved this whole thing the nerd.

"The week will involve myself and Mr. Mackay watching you closely in friendship pairs and the pair that we think is the closest by the end of the week will win a prize."

Prize? The word prize suddenly made everyone in the class look up including Kenny.

If we could win a prize after this pointless week maybe, just maybe it wont be so pointless.

"What sort of prize Mr. Garrison?" Cartman asked in his sweetest voice, the one he uses on his mum at home.

"I don't know yet Eric I think they're still thinking of a price, all I know is that it's expensive."

A loud "oooohh" came from everyone in the room including Cartman. What if it was a chocolate factory tour, or all the free cheesy puffs to last a lifetime!

"I would now like you all to pull your desks together and sit with who I place you with in this room. These will be your pairs for the week and the person you will aim to be close to at the end." As Mr. Garrison called the names of the pairs the screeching of desks and chairs dragging across the floor filled the room.

"Wendy and Bebe, Butters and Jimmy, Token and Clyde, Kyle and Stan…"

Of course Kyle and Stan got put together and Wendy and Bebe, Cartman thought, I'll probably be put with Kenny.

Kyle dragged his chair next to Stan's and they smiled at each other. Wendy and Bebe giggled with each other in excitement and other partners sat excitedly next to each other.

"Eric and Kenny." Kenny dragged his desk over to his; at least he's paying attention now.

"Alright then now I'd like to go through some rules. Firstly there will be one winning pair from each class and Mr. Mackay and myself will judge this class. We judge it so no one can pull a fast one! We know what you're like and we'll know if you're just faking your friendship for the prize!" Did he read Cartman's mind?

"We have also tried to pair you up with who Mr. Mackay and I believe you are close to. As you leave for lunch today I want you to come to my desk and you and your partner will write your names down at the front."

"Mr. Garrison, how are we gonna be judged?" Kyle asked after raising his hand.

"Well Mr. Mackay and I will be monitoring you throughout the week and observing you at break, lunch and in class, honestly if I was anyone else doing that it would be thought of as a criminal offence." He muttered the last part.

Of course, he had to make it difficult didn't he? With Mr. Mackay and Mr. Garrison judging how was Cartman going to win the prize?

"Dude this should be a piece of cake!" Stan smiled at Kyle.

"I know we're bound to get that prize!"

Hmmm dam Jew and his friend. As much as Cartman hates him he's right. His chances of winning this competition with the happy rainbow sunshine friends involved were slim, but they're still chances and he just had to make them bigger. That's another thing you should know about Eric Cartman, when he wants something he doesn't give up easily.

The whole morning dragged as Mr. Garrison explained more rules and told everyone how fun the week was going to be with Mr. Hat but what he didn't realise was that no one was paying attention anymore and they were all just muttering and scheming.

"Alright listen Kenny there's no doubt that we want that prize ok?" Cartman said turning to Kenny sternly who just rolled his eyes.

"Yeah I guess." He muffled through his hoodie.

"You-you guess? Kenny were you even listening? They said it would be expensive damn it and there is no way that I am letting that slip by me!"

"Okay okay!" He replied a little taken back by Cartman's determination.

"Now then, as best friends for the week we need to make a promise."

This would be the deal that would seal the week's fate.

"Promise what?" Kenny replied sceptically.

Cartman just rolled his eyes impatiently. "You promise first then I tell you!"

Kenny held out his hand and hovered it over Cartman's, already waiting to grip his in a handshake.

"Come on you poor piece of crap!"

He slowly put his hand into Cartman's who shook it firmly.

"Good now then, if I come up with a plan to get us that prize you follow ok?"

"Sure" He shrugged.

Excellent everything was set in motion. He looked over to Stan and Kyle laughing, this wasn't going to be easy.

At the end of the morning the bell finally rang for lunch and everyone got up one at a time in their pairs to get to the front and write their names with Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman being last.

Stan and Kyle wrote their names and then Cartman looked up angelically at Mr. Garrison.

"Mr. Garrison." He said sweetly. "I hope you're not judging this week on past experiences." He smiled and fluttered his eyes.

Mr. Garrison didn't even raise his head from the work he was marking when he replied.

"You're not going to win Eric."

"What?"

"Let's face it you and Kenny have as much chance of winning as I have of surviving a bungee jumping trip without the rope."

It was worth a try but this meant that Garrison was definitely not on his side, yet another disadvantage.

At lunch it seemed that everyone was sitting in pairs. Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman all stayed together whilst they were lining up for lunch in the cafeteria.

"What do you guys think the prize will be?" Stan said excitedly looking mainly to Kyle.

"It could be anything and since it's expensive it's probably gonna be sweet!" Kyle replied with an excited grin.

"Oh please you guys, the prize will probably suck ass." Cartman lied. "The school arranged it remember! They think we want book vouchers and crap like that, we might as well all not bother!"

"Cartman, you're just saying that because you know you're not going to win!" Kyle retorted.

Dam Jew. Cartman and Kyle's relationship has always been nothing less than poisonous. The two know they hate each other yet they continue to be around each other every day, which just makes it worse. If Cartman could make Kyle's life a misery he would do it and does attempt to every day and although Kyle doesn't sink to his level he would still just as happily do the same in an instant.

"Shut up Jew, I am not! I'm just saying is all."

As the boys walked in to collect their food they were greeted with the friendly face they see every lunch. Chef the school chef appeared to be the only sensible person in the whole of South Park.

"Well hello there children!" He cheered merrily.

"Hey Chef." The kids replied.

"How's it going?"

"Ok I guess. This friendship week thing is a bit strange and we won't learn anything from it but we'll get a prize at the end." Kyle smiled at him.

"Well that's great, children! And who knows you might learn something even if it is by accident." Chef said wisely as he slopped their food onto the tray.

"Yeah." The boys snorted and walked away leaving Cartman still standing under Chef's friendly gaze.

"Hey Chef, what's the quickest way to change your entire personality and make other people believe it's real?"

Chef looked confused at the question and stared down at Cartman for a while but answered him anyway.

"Well children, you can simply put on an act! Pretend! It's a great skill."

Cartman had already thought of this and he remembered that Mr. Garrison and Mr. Mackay were marking them.

"It's not that simple…" He said quietly.

Chef thought for a while getting the hint that his advice had been rejected.

"Well children, when I was younger I got a few bad grades that I had to show to my parents. They didn't like it one bit, so after a while I come up with the idea that I would simply change my friend's results! That way I looked good without lying and my parents wouldn't be angry. Plus the teachers wouldn't be able to deny my grade as it hadn't changed!"

Cartman thought this over for a while and then he looked around him at the cafeteria and at all the people chatting and smiling in pairs with exaggerated smiles and laughter whenever Mr. Mackay passed them. Stan and Kyle were also smiling and laughing broadly but it seemed less animated and just as convincing.

He smiled devilishly to himself and then took his food over to the table Stan, Kyle and Kenny were already sitting at.

At the end of lunch everyone was walking back to class including the four boys. They stopped off at Stan's locker and waited for him to get some things out. Cartman noticed that Stan and Kyle were exchanging awkward glances and nods like they were hiding something and deciding who should say it. He was confused and about to ask them when eventually they said something.

"Hey guys, we were thinking…just because of this whole friendship week thing and being in pairs and all, that…" Stan started looking over at Cartman and Kenny's faces looking back at him suspiciously as he spoke. "Well maybe we should just hang out in our placed pairs this week."

Cartman knew why he had done this. Of course he didn't want him to drag them down. But it didn't stop him being anymore annoyed by it. The four were a team, always have been so why should this stupid competition change anything? It must've been Kahl who said something the little rat. He looked over to Kenny before saying anything who looked just as angry and confused as he did.

"Fine!" Cartman shouted. "That's fine! We don't need you guys to win this competition anyway! We'll win it fair and square on our own!"

Kyle rolled his eyes at his friend's reaction. It's always the same, but Cartman took it that he didn't believe him.

"Oh we will Kahl!" Cartman stepped closer to Kyle and poked him hard in the chest.

"I promise you, we will!" He said through gritted teeth and then tore Kenny away marching down the corridor.

"You remember that promise?"

Kenny turned to him still walking and smiled