HEY! Okay so I've been on a hiatus for a while _ SORRY GUYS JUST SHOOT ME NOW AAH DX!
So yeah I took a shower and some ideas (and some disturbing images of cartoon characters being murdered)( yeah you'll see... YOU'LL ALL SEE MUAHAHA! Later... in the chapter... possibly...maybe...eh...if I feel like it...) flowed out the shower head and my head absorbed it and it went into my brain and I was like 'Z0MJ!' so uh.. yeah anywaaayyss.. what am I missing... OH PSH! DISCLAIMER!
Me: OOOOHH OLD MAAN KAKUZUUUU!
Kakuzu: I'm not old!
Me: Says the 91 year old string bag _
Kakuzu: shut up... youngster and your-
Me: DUDE YOU JUST CALLED ME A YOUNGSTER! LOL!
Hidan: AAAHAHAHA!
Kakuzu: Psh... shut up.. crazy young'uns and their disrespect towards elders... oh shoot I am old... anyways.. Tigera Lilyfrost does not own Naruto. Or anyone in it. (Yeah thank Jashin!)
Me: _ I heard that... Anyways HOLY CRAP ARE WE GONNA GET TO THE STORY! AAH! THIS IS TAKING FOREVER!
MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL :D btw I started this chap 2 days before bday in September if that tells ya how long I've been away from this story... yeah D:
*edit * …... It's February 11th right now... X_X Please don't kill me... I haven't been writing like, at ALL D:! And I've been pretty busy these past couple months. Family just bought a coffee shop! ^ ^ so... wish us luck!
ENJOY :3
*EDIT THE EDIT * AAAAAHH IT'S APRIL 29TH AND I STILL HAVEN'T PUBLISHED THIS AND ABOUT THE COFFEE SHOP WE BOUGHT... WELL... the lady is the biggest, lying, rude, abusive, bipolar menopause B**** we have EVER dealt with and her PEDOPHILE husband is just as bad! Their lawyer is also a lying bish. But we're trying to settle things with it. WISH US LUCK :3 AND I DYED MY HAIR IT IS NOW AN INOUE ORIHIME ORANGE :3
OH and about me taking so friggen long on this... YOU MAY SHOOT ME NOW. * shotdead *
Okami yawned. They had stayed up super late last night and she had slept in until like 2:30 pm.
Groaning as she clutched her abdomen, she tried to fathom why she felt like absolute crap this morning, besides being insanely tired from staying up until 5:00 am. Why? She looked at her calender and groaned again. That's why.
Growling as she dragged herself out of bed, she walked like a pissed off zombie into her bathroom.
But when she saw she was out of umm... supplies, she growled even louder. "Oh.. my... Jashin... you have to be kidding me... I.. hate.. this.. day.. already.." she spat through gritted teeth.
After she got out of the bathroom, good old Tobi glomped her out of nowhere.
That was a bad move Tobi. A veeerry baaad move. "Tobi... get... the... hell.. off... of.. me.. right.. NOW!" she said and pushed him off.
He tilted his head. "Is Okami-chan okay?" She looked at him with a fierce death glare which made him shrink. "NEVER TACKLE A PMSING GIRL TOBI!" she screamed at him and slammed her door.
Tobi seemed really confused. Groaning and yawning from exhaustion, Kitsune slowly walked out of the extra bedroom. "What who?" she mumbled and slurred.
The orange lollipop-face shrugged before scratching his tilted head. "Kitsune-chan, what's PMSing?" Kistune froze in her tracks after he asked that. "Umm... who mentioned that?"
Getting up, Tobi continued, "Okami-chan... she seemed really mad after I tackled her and screamed 'never tackle a pmsing girl' soo.. what is PMSing?"
Sighing, the brunette girl rubbed her face."Oh man. Okami's time of the month.. well ya see Tobi... erm... well its.. Okami's like cramping...and... it...it's a girl thing okay? I'll tell you when your older..ish... or something like that.. now go make some toast."
Tobi saluted. "Yes Kitsune-chan! Tobi will make toast like a good boy!" he said and quickly jumped down the stairs towards the kitchen.
"Of all the things he had to glomp her." Kitsune murmured as she shook her head.
Then, something hit her.
"Wait... is today... oh shoot. GRRR!" she looked at the calender and much to her dismay, it was that time of the month for her too.
She brightened up when she saw the calender. October 14th. Her birthday was in three days! She was 15. She was only a month and seven days younger that Okami since Okami just turned 16 last month.
"Well that's something to look forward to!" she said to herself happily. She went and checked the bathroom and saw Okami was out of supplies.
She heard Kimi and turn to see her come out of the room in her pink candy pajamas. "Raawr good morning squaw!" she yawned.
Kitsune raised her eyebrow. "Squaw?"
Kimi pointed at herself. "Me squaw." then she pointed to Kitsune. "You squaw." Kitsune giggled. Neko came out of the room rubbing her droopy eyes.
Kimi hugged her. "Neko! How goes the wigwam and the other squaws!" Neko raised her eyebrow. "Since when did we become Indians?" Kimi thought for a moment. "Umm... since we entered Okami's house!" she said and smiled.
Neko looked around. "Oh yeah, where is Okami anyways?" Kitsune pointed at Okami's door. "That time again..." Kimi and Neko both stared towards the door grimly. "Ooooh..." they said in unison. Kistune groaned. "Yeah, same for me too..."
Kimi gasped. "Oh no we're doomed! And so is my chocolate stash I keep in Okami's attic!"
Kitsune stared at her hungrily and, before anyone said another word, Okami came bursting through the door, looking like the pits with mangled hair giving her a ravenous look.
"Chocolate... Did you say chocolate?" hesitantly, Kimi nodded. "CHOCOLATE! CHOOOOCOLAAAAAATE!" she screamed and started chasing Kimi around the house.
"AH!" Kistune jumped and grabbed Okami's legs. "Okami! Here girl!"Okami looked back at her with a crazed looking face. "We... must haves it... must have the precious!" Kitsune commanded Okami to sit.
"Good Okami! Good girl.. calm down... now here's some chocolate." she gave it to Okami who scarfed it down hungrily.
"Good Okami!" Okami stretched like a cat. "Ah yeah.. Oh where's Tobi? I feel bad about what happened earlier..." hearing what she said, Tobi ran up the stairs.
"Is Okami-chan okay with her PMSing?" Okami had an anime sweatdrop.
"Erm..." she began awkwardly while smiling. "Please don't say that... yeah... I'm fine." Tobi swiftly shook his hands in front of his face. "Okay! No more!"
Looking around, Okami realized she looked like a dump. "Oh jeez... I'm a mess I hope Dei doesn't see me like-"
"Okami, un!" Deidara came up behind her and hugged her. Just as she started to cramp. Oh burnt bungholes on a cracker...
She forced a smile on her not-so-happy face. "Deidara." she said with a slightly pained voice.
Sasori walked from the downstairs room. "Hey brat." Deidara turned toward him and and growled. "Danna, un."
He nodded to Okami. "Hey Sasori!" she slightly grunted when a wave of pain went through her. Deidara caught that. "Okami, what's wrong?" she forced a laugh. "Oh nothing heheh I'm just dandy!"
Sasori looked her over and stared. "It seems that she's on her monthly woman cycle." he stated nonchalantly and caused her to gasp. "Wha?" she asked, now totally confused.
He boredly pointed to her lower parts. Gulping nervously, she looked down. A ball of ice formed in her already heating up body. Why did she even wake up today?
Because she was out of supplies, she had nothing to stop from staining her pajama bottoms... which were light blue with white polar bears all over. Now stained blood red all over the front.
After a few seconds of staring down, too embarrased to look up, she screamed and ran to her bathroom upstairs as fast as her legs could carry her.
Slamming the door shut, she looked in the mirror at her bright red face.
WHAT THE HECK! why did I wake up today? And everyone saw it... thank goodness Hidan didn't. Oh frick I'd be so humiliated if he di-
She heard a knock.
"Okami!" she recognized the voice as Ketsueki's.
She slightly cracked open the door. "Yes?" Ketsueki looked worried. "Everything alright in there? I heard you scream." then she noticed Okami's pajama bottoms.
"Yikes... need me to run to the store?" Okami nodded. "Please? Here's my wallet and car keys. NO DRIVING FAST! And take Neko..." Ketsueki laughed. "Kay! Be back soon!"
Shutting the door, Okami breathed a long sigh of relief. Good... now how to deal with this?
Okami heard Kitsune's voice and her knocking at the door. She opened it and she had a fresh change of clothes for Okami. Okami hugged her. "Thank you!"
But before Okami could close the door, she was handed a plate of toast.
She just stared at it curiously. "Um.. thanks?" Kitsune shrugged.
"Tobi made a lot of toast. I swear hasn't he ever seen a toaster befor- oh wait... nope he hasn't." Okami laughed at the thought of a huge super villian master mind obsessed with a toaster.
Then, she looked at Kitsune with a serious face. "You know what they say," she began, with a finger up. "All toasters toast toast!" Kistune laughed before looking downstairs.
Hidan apparently had woken up because he was stomping around complaining about something. He stomped up the stairs. "Oi, b****es." Kitsune frowned and pointed at him. "GET OFF MY CLOUD!" she yelled and threw a roll of toilet paper at him.
He growled and walked back downstairs.
Both girls didn't know really what had just happened, but Hidan was just subdued by a roll of butt wipes.
* INTERMISSION *(Hey that's basically what it is. I mean do you wipe your toilet with it? No. So it should be called 'anus paper' or 'bunghole hankie' woah wait... that sounded weird... LOL like some old man goes up to some teenagers and because of his hearing he thinks they're like talking about toilet paper and he's like "Hey young'uns! Back in my day toilet paper was called 'bunghole hankies'!" and they just stare and back away. They're just like "Woah... umm.. what the hell man? WHAT THE HELL?")
* Okay so getting back to the story...
Kitsune had joined Okami in the bathroom and they had been sitting there talking about old times. Kitsune mentioned one of their best friends from the other town and Okami facepalmed.
"Kits! We gotta call him over!" Kitsune became excited just thinking about their awesome friend. "Yeah! Why didn't we call him in the first place?"
One hour later
"KILLER!" Okami and Kitsune both glomped their light-blonde haired friend as soon as he walked into the house.
"TIGER! LILLY!" they all cheered and had a giant group hug. All of the Akatsuki just stared, dumbfounded.
He looked at all of them. "WOAH WHAT!" he ran up and poked Kisame in the face. Kisame sniffed.
Killer, or as his real name, Thomas, watches Naruto so he knows who the Akatsuki are. (Okami is Tiger and Kitsune is Lilly. Those are the nicknames those three call each other. Yeah long story..)
He looked back at his two friends. "Guys?" they pulled him into the bathroom.
Okami explained about the kittens and the soda and crap and the transformation blah blah.
He sat there and took all of this in. "Wait... evil super villians from Naruto show up...and you didn't even call me?"
"It was a bit out of our occupied minds at the time sorry!" Kitsune said as she waved her hands about.
They heard car noises and soon after the sound of banging on the bathroom door.
"OI B**** HERE'S YOUR WOMAN PRODUCTS!" Okami flushed and ruffly opened the door.
Hidan violently threw the bag at her face and it whacked her out cold.
Okami woke up groaning shortly to find her friends around her. "The frig happened?" she asked as the pounding in her head started to grow louder.
"Hidan threw your bag of pads at you and it had a cement chunk in it with a smiley face drawn on it and it whacked you in the head." Kimi said while munching on a Snickers bar.
Poor Okami once again was flushed red. "OH COME ON! DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO KNOW ABOUT MY PERSONAL ITEMS? FISHSTICKS! Okay and wait... why am I always getting knocked out? There was the fricken tree now a rock with a smile- WAIT.. HOLD ON. WHO BOUGHT A ROCK WITH A SMILEY FACE ON IT?"
"Tobi diiiiiiiiid! And it's a cement chunk Okami-chan get it right you silly goose!" Okami glared around. "WHO BROUGHT TOBI?"
Neko raised her hand. "He was begging me and... well I couldn't say no! And he wo-" "He wouldn't shut up about the friggen toys in the toy section so we left the store" Ketsueki cut in.
"Then some shady looking guy in a trenchcoat was all like 'Hey wanna buy something fuuuuun?' and Tobi's all like 'YEAH!' and I'm like 'Tobi no...' then the dude was like actually Willie Wonka's brother so he started singing this REALLY gay song about rainbows and crap and he sells happy cement chunks which he calls his 'babies' so Tobi bought one... I used your money by the way because I'm broker than a hobo." She finished, occasionally glancing at Tobi and Neko throughout the whole story as if to confirm her being truthful.
Neko and Tobi nodded.
Slapping her face in annoyance, Okami sighed. "Do you guys assume I'm a bank or something? Wait don't answer that." she said, pointing at Ketsueki.
Then she thought for a moment. "Wait, trenchcoat?" Ketsueki nodded. "Yeah. He was wearing glasses too." Okami gasped. "That's what the guy I saw that sold you drugs looked like!"
Thomas gasped dramatically with is hands on the side of his face. Then he looked around puzzled. "Wait what?"
Okami poked her forehead a bunch of times while pondering. "We gotta find out who this guy is. Weird things seem to happen when he's around. Wait! Give me that cement chunk!"
Tobi handed to her and everyone stared at it. It slowly started morphing. Morphing into a clown face. First it looked all happy then it got darker and demented looking.
It had jagged teeth and a huge creepy smile. It was like Ronald McDonald and Pennywise had a baby and that baby had a baby with Bozo the Clown. That's what the fricken scary piece of crap cement chuck was now.
"AAH!" Okami threw it out the window and it grew into a huge clown. It was acting like a mindless zombie though.
It looked around, dumbly gazing at houses, people, children, and a foaming drool protruded from its crimson jaws.
Kimi screamed, "I HATE YOU WILLIE WONKA! AND YOUR CREEPY BROTHER AND HIS STONED CEMENT CHUNKS!"
And, after walking around for a few minutes, it disappeared in a puff of smoke.
The Akatsuki glared at Tobi who scratched his head nervously. Tobi gonna get a beatin'.
"Ya know, I think I'm gonna go... lay down or something..." Okami said with a long sigh.
Pain was still intently watching the streets with cautious concern. "We need to catch whoever keeps doing these things. They must be the same one who teleported us here." he said, thoughtfully looking down at the floor, obviously anylizing the situation.
Deidara softly picked up Okami. "Come on Okami, you look tired, un." she giggled. "Thanks Dei." and snuggled up against his chest.
THAT WAS HORRIBLE. AND VERY OLD. The next chapter will be better I promise! GAH... I'm just posting this because I haven't and I don't wanna start slacking off again. And I might be occupied by my other story, Hombre Lobo for a while so see ya guys! :3
Once again... sorry this chapter really sucked... T_T
Madara: Yeah. That was preetty pathetic.
Me: Yeah, thanks for rubbing that in... NOW TIME FOR YOUR BRAN MUFFINS!
Madara: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
* EDIT OF DOOM * OKAY SO I'VE BEEN TAKING CLASSICAL COMMUNICATIONS / ENGISH CLASS TO IMPROVE MY WRITING BECAUSE... DRUMROLL DUN DUN DUN AS SCREW IT. I'M GONNA BE WRITING A BOOK HOPEFULLY THIS YEAR SO I TRIED IMPROVING THE CHAPTER ADDING MORE DETAIL AND MIXING THE SENTENCE OPENER A BIT SO IT'S NOT ALL LIKE THE SAME AND BORING SO YEAH...