This was started way before Christmas, but I only finished it recently. Think of it as a really, really, really early Xmas gift or a really late one.

I don't know where this came from. I was just reading Mistletoe fics in all my favourite fandoms, and someone made the mistake of giving me caffeine, so I stayed awake all night and started this. Then I continued it and was like, 'Hey, I should publish this on FF!' so I gave it to my friend, who was like 'Hey, you should publish this on FF!'

Yeah.

Warning: This story was written when I wasn't in my right mind. Also, I had a friend help me with inspiration and stuff, and she's insane and kept wanting me to involve unicorns somehow.
And I don't own Glee.

Dalton at Christmas time was one step under a full-blown sex riot- everywhere you went you could see perfectly straight boys making out under mistletoe and somehow Wes had the bad luck to be caught under the offending plant with the school principal. Nobody thought twice about kissing their best friend if they happened under the plant, and Kurt had started to doubt Wes and David's sexuality when David has Wes pinned up against the wall in the hallway, surrounded by a crowd, and proceeded to eat his face off. That, the countertenor was sure, wasn't exactly necessary to avoid 'the curse' that came of walking out from under the mistletoe without a kiss.

Kurt, having been subjected to lip-rape before (albeit, this was a much less offensive form), was one of the few boys who walked around the school with his eyes on the ceiling, avoiding the plant at all costs. No matter how many times Wes and David had tried to kiss him, Kurt always managed to step out of the way quickly, rolling his eyes at the boy's pouts and dashing into class before they had another chance. Despite his reluctance to participate in the actual activity, though, Kurt always found it entertaining to see some of the more uncomfortable boys in the unfortunate position, and got weird looks from Blaine when he burst into laughter one night at the thought of Finn wondering the halls at Christmas time.

What Kurt found most bizarre about the whole situation, though, was the fact that it seemed that the more boys you'd kissed, the more bragging rights you had- to the point where most boys (Wes, David and Blaine included) kept a tally and risked being late for class by standing under a sprig of the plant, waiting for a boy who hadn't yet been violated.

"So, Kurt, how many have you got so far?" asked David as he, Wes and Blaine walked into Kurt and Blaine's shared room one day after school. "I've got thirty, but Wes here had forty-one and Blaine was on a roll today, going from twenty-nine to forty-five." Kurt merely raised an eyebrow at the two boys who were far too enthusiastic about this to be completely straight and the gay one who was enjoying this far too much (which did not send pangs of jealousy straight to Kurt's heart, thank you very much). "For your information, boys, my lips have managed to be used for talking only since that plant was put up, and I intend for it to stay that way." Blaine's eyebrows shot up, an incredulous expression that matched his friend's gracing his face.
"How on earth did you do that? I think you're the only boy in Dalton history who has managed not to kiss someone."

Kurt tried and failed to keep the smug look on his face in check. "I have extremely good reflexes, Blaine; why else would Sue Sylvester allow me to join the Cheerios?"

The words had flown from his mouth without Kurt thinking and while all three of closest Dalton friends looked at him with a shocked expression, Kurt changed the subject back to kissing. "Anyway, I don't really want to kiss a whole bunch of guys to prove a point. It would be a pointless waste of time."

Wes looked like he was going to say something, but a wicked grin lit up Blaine's face and he said, hands on hips, "I bet you're just too scared to join in on the fun. You're scared that you won't be able to beat my reign for the last two years."

Kurt narrowed his eyes and cocked his head slightly to the side with two raised eyebrows and smirked because even though he though the tradition useless, and then there was fact that Blaine knew him too well and was probably pulling him right into a trap, Kurt Hummel never, ever backed down from a challenge.

...

Every boy at Dalton had gotten used to the fact that Kurt didn't like the mistletoe tradition over the past few weeks and many of them had been trying to kiss the poor boy, with no luck. Jason McIness was one of these boys, and had been following Kurt around the last few days teasing him with some friends. Kurt has just given them a mocking smile and walked off to class, and the boys had laughed and gone their own ways.

"Hey Kurt," Jason came in step with the feminine brunette, spying a sprig of mistletoe up ahead. "How are you?" he asked with a grin, surprised at the glint in the younger boy's eyes as he returned it.
"Oh, I'm more than fine, Jason." Kurt said, and didn't even hesitate to step under the mistletoe above him and raise an eyebrow at the shocked boy in front of him. "You wouldn't want to be cursed, would you?"

Jason caught on as he saw Blaine, Wes and Dave around the corner and grinned, leaning in to place his lips on Kurt's. But Kurt wouldn't have any of that, wrapping his arms around Jason's neck as the older boy wrapped his own arms around Kurt's waist and suddenly people seemed to have noticed because they were attracting a crown and there were some wolf-whistles. Finally Kurt pulled away, winked at Jason and walked over to his friends, who were staring at him. "What?" Kurt asked innocently as the crowd broke up (with quite a few people patting Kurt on the back). "I didn't want to be cursed." Then he got out a piece of paper drew one tally.
Wes grinned and patted him on the back, and the group started walking again. "You're turning into one of us, mate." Then he and Kurt stepped under yet another of sprig of that stupid plant and didn't even care that Blaine and David were watching as they kissed. Wes remarked when he had pulled back, "Man, Kurt, you're a great kisser. And I'm straight."

Kurt winked and ignored the look on Blaine's face as he walked to class.

...

Kurt had kissed over twenty guys before lunch and even some of the straight guys were coming back for more- in mere hours, Kurt Hummel had gone from the prude who didn't like mistletoe to the surprisingly good kisser who was on his way to beating Blaine to the title of most same-sex kisses. As he and David walked into the lunchroom Kurt noticed Blaine and Wes talking- Blaine looked frustrated and torn and Wes looked close to laughing is arse off. Kurt walked up to them and their conversation broke off quickly. Kurt was smirking a bit while he ate because he could feel Blaine's gaze on his forehead and he never knew being a tease could be so much fun. "So Blaine," Kurt turned to the buy he was secretly in love with and grinned. "How many kisses have you gotten so far?" Blaine narrowed his eyes and got out his piece of paper.

"Fifty-three." he replied with a smug grin. "Well, fifty-three separate guys."

Kurt tilted his head and smiled lightly. "In two and a half weeks? Man, I've gotten nearly thirty since this morning." he said and went back to his salad. David and Wes shared a grin at the look on Blaine's face. The shorter boy was glaring at Kurt with a mixture of jealousy and unmistakable lust. "Nearly thirty? Are you joking?" Blaine demanded through gritted teeth.

Kurt looked up at Blaine and smirked as he locked eyes with the older boy. "Are you jealous, Blaine, that you haven't had your turn yet?"

Blaine glared and tried to ignore Wes and David laughing their arses off.

...

Blaine was furious for a number of reasons.

One, his title as the Supreme Kisser of Dalton was in jeopardy.

Two, everyone seemed to want Kurt to win this little unofficial battle.

Three, the guy he was secretly in love with was becoming a mistletoe whore and seemed to have kissed every guy in Dalton except Blaine.

And four, Wes and David thought this was fucking hilarious.

"Will you two shut up?" the hobbit-like boy demanded for what seemed like the thousandth time as they saw Kurt kissing a random guy in the hall. "It's not helping."

David wiped the tears from his eyes and tried to stop grinning. "Dude, just tell Kurt how you feel. Then maybe you could get some of that action." he gestured towards Kurt who had broken free of the kiss and was currently marking down another tally.

Blaine glared. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Kurt's my friend."

"That you want to ravish." pointed out Wes as he walked under some mistletoe with David, promptly kissing his best friend. "You should kiss him already, it's not like everyone else hasn't."

The shorted boy glared. "Wes, no matter how I feel about Kurt, it doesn't matter because he'll never like me in the same way, okay? Friends." he added, just to get the point across because the looks David and Wes were giving him were anything but believing.

"Blaine," David spoke slowly, as he would with a rather small child. "You think Kurt doesn't like you?" He got a reluctant nod. "Blaine. Let's get this clear. Kurt. Wants. To. Get. In. Your. Pants."

"Kurt wants to get where?" said countertenor walked up to the boys and grinned at Blaine. "Are you still angry, Blaine? Because you're glaring at me like if you do it long enough, I'll explode."

"Oh my God, a million dirty jokes just popped into my head."

"Shut up, Wes."

Kurt turned back to Blaine expectantly, raising an eyebrow and placing a soft hand on his hips. Blaine took a deep breath and faked a smile.

"Why would I be angry, Kurt? You can kiss whoever you want." Was he imagining that disappointed look on Kurt's face?

But the disappointed look was gone as Kurt just smiled lightly and walked away. David rolled his eyes and smacked Blaine on the back of the head. "Idiot."

...

Blaine wanted to kiss Kurt. Blaine wanted to kiss Kurt really, really bad. Wes knew this. He could see this every time Blaine's eyes lingered on Kurt for a few moment's more than appropriate and when Blaine had suddenly become more interested in shopping because, let's face it, when he was waiting outside the dressing rooms for Kurt, he was totally picturing what was going on inside. Either that, or imagining ravishing the younger boy in between trying on sweaters.

"David, we have to do something." Wes whispered to David one day after school, while the two were sitting in their room doing homework. "The sexual tension is killing me."

David gave his best friend a weird look. "You do realize we're the only ones in the room, right?" He was ignored. Wes sat down beside him and glanced around quickly before pulling out a notebook with the heading OPERATION MISTLETOE spelled out in black marker.

"David, this notebook is our key to a tension-free school. I have devised a plan that will, if followed correctly, will result in Blaine and Kurt having hot gay sex in a possibly public place."

David nodded, then frowned. "And we want them to get arrested for indecent exposure why...?"

Wes shook his head. "The place isn't important, it's the action." He paused, getting up to lock the door and checking under the bed before sitting down again and opening the book. "So here's what we've got to do..."

...

David was straight, completely so with a girlfriend and everything. But, after attending an all boy's school and getting drunk at numerous parties, making out with other guys was just a part of life. But after being introduced to Wes's OPERATION MISTLETOE, David wasn't quite sure.

"Kurt is never going to agree to this."

"He'll be all for it."

"No, he won't."

"He's going to love this plan."

"It's going to backfire."

"It's foolproof."

"I am not pretending to date Kurt!"

"Yes, you are!"

"Blaine would never go after another person's guy!"

"He'll be too blinded by jealousy to even think about that fact!"

"I have a girlfriend!"

"She can be in on it, too, then!"

"No!"

Wes pouted in an attempt to look cute and David rolled his eyes. "Wes, pouting doesn't work on me, and there is no way in hell I am going to pretend to date Kurt. And nobody except you likes this plan and it will all end up backfiring. Blaine will move on if he thinks Kurt liked me back. Not to mention getting Kurt to agree with this so called plan." He glared at his friend and soon the two were in an intense glaring competition, only to be interrupted when a voice came from the doorway,

"You know, I have a key to your door, Wes. You gave it to me ever since that weekend you locked yourself out of your room and needed to know someone could help you." Blaine raised an eyebrow at the two and held up his hand to stop any explanations. "I was outside the door from the part where you explained why exactly a kitten tied to a bright orange kite would be needed. And let me say, even though you've obviously put a lot of thought into this little operation, it would never work, especially now that I know." Blaine paused. "And I've decided I'm going to kiss Kurt tomorrow. And then tell him exactly how I feel." He smiled a bit. "I'm nervous."

David, relieved that he wasn't going to be forced into any more boy on boy kissing than necessary, congratulated his friend and sent a glare in Wes's direction. Wes pouted.

...

Kurt, secretly, still thought that this whole kissing thing was ridiculous and pointless. What was the point in randomly kissing guys because a plant tells you to? Well, it seemed for him, the point was making Blaine jealous, and completing the challenge; because Hummel's never back down from a challenge.

So Kurt walked around kissing other students when the mistletoe was there, marking off a tally and acting like it was no big deal. He'd stopped caring about his first kiss when Wes and David had gotten him drunk at a party and he'd ended up throwing himself at a random boy, who was equally drunk. Or, that's what the pictures said. He'd groaned when he'd seen them and decided his first kiss would be between him and a guy who liked him, and the rest were just practise. Because one can only have so many first kisses, and it was getting kind of ridiculous not counting all of these.

...

The Dalton boys had caught onto the fact that Kurt was kissing them to prove Blaine wrong, and were eagerly helping him in his quest to show the older boy up. Plus, many of them thought that maybe if they got Blaine jealous enough, he'd jump Kurt and the two would live happily ever after, without any of that suffocating sexual tension. So they went out of their way to kiss Kurt, and if Blaine around that was a plus, because they knew that Kurt was in love with Blaine, and that Blaine felt the same way about Kurt, because all one had to do was watch them interact and it was so damn obvious.

...

Blaine had a plan; he would walk with Kurt and kiss him under some mistletoe and while they were still close, he would tell him that he loved everything about him- from Kurt's hair to his eyes to his skin-tight jeans that reminded him off Katy Perry and what was underneath at the same time. Okay, maybe not that last one but he'd tell him everything else. Because he had to. Because seeing Kurt kissing other guys was torture.

He walked Kurt to breakfast, resisting the urge to hold the younger boy's hand as he kept an eye out for the nearest sprig of mistletoe. "So, Kurt," he began, moving a little to the side so the two would walk under it for certain. "I was thinking..." He trailed off and Kurt looked at him expectantly. Then they were under the mistletoe and where was everyone else and shouldn't this hall be crowded and her was really, really nervous. Blaine gulped. "I, uh, was just thinking. We've both kissed a lot of guys... But, you know, not each other."

And just as Blaine was preparing to run away and who gives a fuck about that stupid curse, he felt a soft pair of lips crashing down on his and two slender arms weaving their way around his neck, the hands knotting through his hair. Then he was kissing back, moaning as Kurt opened his mouth and when had he become pinned against that wall? Then Kurt pulled back and grinned, his lips slightly swollen, and rested his forehead against Blaine's. "You're a good kisser." he breathed out. Blaine nodded. "Yeah. Look, Kurt, I have something I need to tell you." He glanced around and once again noted that they were suspiciously alone. Then he looked back into Kurt's expectant eyes, and all of that suspicion melted away, replaced by fear and nervousness as he said, "I love you."

And there was silence. Kurt just stared and stared and oh my God why was he staring so much?

And just as Blaine was about to run away like a little girl, Kurt smiled and kissed him again. And kissed him, and kissed him, and oh my God were those cheers and shit, were Wes and David filming this whole time? Kurt didn't seem to notice, though, because he pulled back and grinned. "I love you."

And Blaine decided that he, too, wouldn't pay any attention to the other boys or their cheering and wolf whistling because fuck, Kurt Hummel was in love with him and nothing else really mattered.

Except the Mistletoe competition.

He still wanted to win that.

Hm. Not my best. But still... Reviews are love, and every time someone doesn't review, it makes Wes cry. You don't want Wes to cry, do you?