This is a list of lessons I learned from Twilight. Yes, I actually did read all of the books. Well, I tried to read all of the books and couldn't but hey, at least I tried. One of my biggest pet peeves, actually, is people who have not read Twilight and tell everyone how horrible it is.

Pedophilia is not limited to just humans. (Edward, Jacob, Quil and their various mates/ imprints.)

Vampires can be anorexic too. (Edward is constantly refusing to eat.)

Werewolves can be very moody. (Jacob for nearly the entire series.)

Vampires can also be very moody and depressed. (Edward for the entire series.)

You can be trapped in a bi species (or even a tri species, some could argue) abusive relationship. And, you might not even ever know that you are. (Just search for "Reasons Why Edward is Abusive" on Google.)

Apparently, many real people like Mary-Sues. (Bella is a Mary- Sue.)

Many people also like self inserts it seems. (Bella is a total self insert of Stephanie Meyer.)

My Immortal can also be sold as a real book for millions. (The similarities between My Immortal and Twilight are shocking.)

Apparently, Dracula wasn't actually supposed to drink any blood, because that's just not cool anymore. (Vegetarian? Really?)

The secret to being a successful author is not to write a good book, no, it is to write a book that is easy for girls to insert themselves into. (Bella is so bland that any girl could pretend to be her. That's probably why the books are so popular.)

Movies can actually be more enjoyable than the book. Not by much, but still by some. (I could not get through New Moon, but I could kind of sit through the movie. Mostly because Taylor Lautner has hot abs, but still.)

Apparently really ugly guys can now be considered "Hot". (Robert P. is gross, and Taylor has a potato nose.)

The parody can be better than the real thing. (Vampires Suck was way better than Twilight.)

Look alike actors can be hotter than the real actors. (Just look at the guys playing Rob and Taylor in Vampire suck.)

Look alike actors can be better actors than the real actors. (K. Stewart vs. Jenn Proske, Jenn wins.)

Mormons can't write. (Self explanatory)

Boy vampires can also go through PMS. (Edward)

Apparently, some people really can have everything. (Bella is a Mary- Sue)

Even in the stupidest of books, you can still find decent characters. However the only decent characters will not be liked by the main character so you wont see too much of them and they will most likely become a sell out by the end of the series. (Rosalie became a total sell out and then Leah was just awesome, but never in the books.)

Some people should have just died when they were supposed to. (all the vampires)

Well, review already.