Chapter 1: Jazz meets Primus

Or: Why Jazz truly returned from the Well of All Sparks

Ann.: This is absolute crack, but I couldn´t help it. When I read the quote, the image just popped into my head without warning: Primus with his head in his hands in a gesture of exasperation (or even despair? *snickers*) and a madly grinning Jazz standing in front of him. This is Movieverse.

It´s all the plotbunnies fault! For the sake of your keyboard, don't eat or drink while reading this!

Disclaimer: I don't own them, I only wish I did. They belong to Hasbro.

Warnings: mechxmech-kissing, character-death, more-than-implied slash

"I´m ready to meet with my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter" Winston Churchill

"You want a piece of me?"

"No, I want two!"

Surprisingly (or not) Jazz´ last thought was "Prowl will be so pissed".

Surprisingly his first thought was "Prowl will be so pissed". After all who wouldn´t be, if their bondmate had gotten himself killed by going up against a Decepticon who wasn´t only more than twice their size but also the most powerful of them all, and without backup, too?

And there was no doubt that Jazz was dead. How else would one explain the huge entity he beheld: the bot was easily the size of Cybertron and seemed to change colour and form from one moment to the next: one time the saboteur looked at a white and green seeker, the next a blue and black doorwinger… seriously it was irritating to the Polyhexian.

One thing never changed though: the golden optics that looked at him, radiating love and amusement.

"Welcome, bright spark" Now he looked like a red and gold coloured mech eerily reminiscent of Optimus Prime.

"So…", Jazz looked around, "This is the Well of All Sparks, ain't it."

"Yes, it is" the lavender femme in front of him smiled.

"An' ya're Primus" the saboteur coked his helm and gave the other a once over. He had changed form once again. Sure, it would be kind of stupid to think that Primus could be restricted to one form, but really… "Do ya have ta change your looks like that?"

The bot chuckled, not phased in the slightest, and after a moment changed his form yet again to that off an all white mech with a pair of strange looking wings.

"Does this form meet with your approval" he pointedly asked.

"Yep" the Solstice answered, completely devoid of anything even remotely resembling shame. Besides he had an agenda and was never one to beat around the crystal bush. "If ya show me da exit I'm gonna be on ma way"

Astonished, Primus looked at him. Asking if he could send them back to the world of the functioning wasn't that uncommon a reaction from his beloved creations, but none of them had ever been so… blasé about it, as if it was a matter of course.

"You are dead, creation. There is no way for you to go back" he patiently explained.

"There's always a way" Jazz simply answered.

Primus shook his head. "Not with this"

The deity smiled gently at Jazz, only to notice that the Solstice was scrutinizing him in a disconcerting way, almost like an organic dog would a bone trying to decide which part to chew on first. Orgnanic beings were truly fascinating… Meanwhile the grin that had spread across Jazz's face threatened to break his faceplates. Also it was a grin that would have Unicron scared even in his best (or worst?) days.

"So… if I'm annoying enough, are ya gonna send meh back?"

Primus just laughed.

"Well, are ya?"

"Of course I will, bright spark" There was a sense of laughter behind that statement. As if there was anything Jazz could do, that would aggravate him that much.

"I'm gonna hold ya to that promise" Jazz grinned back. If only Primus had known…

Sometime later

In retrospect Primus thought he should have known. After all he knew Jazz, he had gifted the mech's spark with a strong will, boundless creativity and that particular brand of humor. He had watched over Jazz all his life as he watched over every single one of his creations and had been witness to everything the saboteur had done, every battle he had fought, every party he had enjoyed, every friend he had found (and lost), his bonding to Prowl… and every prank Jazz had ever pulled.

Nevertheless he wouldn't have imagined that a single spark, in particular the spark in front of him, could wreak such havoc in such a short time. The pointed look directed at said bot was happily ignored however, in favor of more important things.

Jazz's grin almost broke his faceplate. "Told ya, mech"

Primus narrowed his optics at the Solstice. He might as well not have bothered. "You know that statement was intended to be a joke"

"An' I told ya I'd hold ya to it" the silver mech replied.

Primus found himself battling the urge to bury his faceplate in his servos. It took a considerable amount of willpower not to sigh out loud.

"Fine, you're allowed back." He chose to ignore the whoop of joy coming from the creation in front of him. "In fact, I order you back. And I also expressly order you not to turn up here again without your bondmate to restrain you. Either you both enter the Well, or you both stay in the world of the living"

"Yessir!" The Saboteur saluted and made to turn away.

"And Jazz?" At the mention of his name the silver mech turned toward Primus again, who bent down and placed a loving kiss on his forehead. "I'm proud of you, beloved creation" After that, Jazz knew no more.

How did the humans put it? The light was calling them?

However when Jazz powered up his optics it wasn't light that was greeting him: it was the worried faceplate of his Prowler.

Faster than anything the laws of physics should actually allow, Jazz was up tackling his bondmate in a near crushing hug and kissing him senseless. There were no protests from the black and white Tactician who responded eagerly… completely forgetting about their audience: an amused Prime, a laughing Ironhide, a happily chirping 'Bee and a glowering Ratchet. They simply kissed on and on and on…

Prime cleared his throat and Jazz reluctantly decided to part from a now thoroughly dazed Prowl in order to get the "Welcome Back"s out of the way, so Prowl and he could go back to the more important things. Primus how he loved those wings!

"Welcome back, Jazz!" Optimus Prime said "You were sorely missed" he threw a glance at Prowl who was now happily wrapped in Jazz's embrace, a welcome change from the devastated and unresponsive mech from earlier. "We were rather surprised when your spark simply appeared out of nowhere"

"The old mech really wasn't subtle about kickin' me out" Jazz laughed at the inquisitive glances he garnered but didn't elaborate. He was just happy about being back.

The End

What Jazz did to annoy Primus? My Jazz- Muse wouldn`t say, he only dropped hints. Something along the lines of inviting Unicron over for poker, repeatedly singing the "Song That Never Ends" and "A Hundred Cubes By The Wall" while following Primus around, announcing a plot to try and take over the Well of All Sparks and some such things ;)