Disclaimer: I don't own Stoked, or Reef and Fin would have hooked up a long time ago.

Some spoilers for Series 2, but nothing major.

She hates him.

He is the most frustrating, immature, sexist pig that Fin McCloud's ever had the misfortune of meeting and she hates his guts.

Shut up. She knows that she might have done some things that say differently, but she puts most of them down to temporary lack of judgement.

After all, he's only kind of cute.

Sure, she did break up him and that Blaire girl, but that was for women kind, dammit!It's not her fault it got totally misinterpreted.

She only agreed to have a stupid surf-off with him because she has never let anyone put her down and she's not going to start now. She doesn't care what he thinks.

And she could hardly pee on her own leg, could she?

And maybe they almost kissed. So what? She thought she was going to be stranded on a desert island for the rest of her life with Reef. She needed something to past the time.

And she laughed at him later, so that has to count for something.

She might have helped him out of that 'Amber Greens' situation, but that's only because that girl is unstable. She would have done the same with her worst enemy.

Yes, she got a bit ticked off when he and Lo went out. But he'd been flirting with her for forever. He could have at least warned her she wasn't interested (not that she cares).

Just to clear things up, she did not try and break Lo and Reef up. She didn't. Shut up. She prefers to call it 'Tactical Methods to Demonstrate Proper Treatment of Boyfriends.' She shouldn't have let some guy come in-between her and Lo. She knows that now.

So she might have got confused at some points, but now she knows she hates him. Nothing will change that.

So why can't she stop thinking about him?

It's driving her insane- she hates him, she shouldn't care what he's doing! Yet for some strange, twisted reason, she does.

God, why does she do it? Why does she go out of her way to impress him, talk to him, get him to look at her?

She thinks it's disgusting, but she can't stop, because whenever she's not arguing with him she feels- somehow- incomplete.

It's ridiculous. She hates it. She doesn't want to be with Reef. But at the same time she knows she can't live without him, that somehow this stupid kook has wound himself into her life.

She hates herself for everything she does when she's around him, the way her breath stops when she watches him surf, the fact that she can't keep her eyes off him when they're in the same room, how if they're alone she can't resist putting her hand on his arm.

It stupid. She hates him. She knows it. He knows it.

And when you hate someone, you can't love them too.