Dad could die. Sam was trembling, all ideas about being normal and away from Dad having disappeared from his mind. Dean could see it in his brother's eyes, the fear, the sheer terror that their father might have died and they wouldn't even have known about it until days later when the landlord found Dad's corpse bled to death.
It was hard to keep breathing, but he had to be strong. Sammy needed him. Dad needed him to be strong, to look after Sam, to…
Joe took Dean and Sam with him to the hospital and Mike came along with them. Dean couldn't figure him out. There was something about him that was just… off.
That morning Dean had opened the bathroom door only to see Mike standing naked in front of the mirror. He wasn't even doing anything, just looking at his reflection in utter fascination. Dean had quickly stepped back, freaked out.
Sam had been eating breakfast by the time Dean got to the kitchen and Dean quickly grabbed a stack of pancakes of his own, before sitting down next to his brother. When Mike came into the kitchen he was fully dressed, neither of them had said a word about what Dean had seen. From the way Mike just went right for a plate of his own, he didn't even seem to act as if anything out of the ordinary had happened.
Brenda had had to head out early, Suzie's mom was getting out of prison soon, and Brenda was taking Suzie over to see her, get them used to one another again, before Suzie went back home.
Brenda had taken little Joey with her, leaving the Winchesters and Mike alone with Joe.
Joe in his turn, had decided that this humongous responsibility demanded a feast of pancakes, bacon and every breakfast option imaginable. Dean had already though he liked the guy, now he knew for sure.
Dean had just grabbed his third helping, when the phone rang. Dean had just forced a second helping towards his brother who just pushed it back, pretending he had enough, even though he'd only taken some eggs aside of his original pancakes. How was Sam supposed to grow if he refused to eat?
It took Dean a moment to realize that Joe was looking at him and Sam. He quickly looked away, wondering what he'd done wrong now. It had been bad enough that Dad had missed their last visit. Dean had cleaned up their bedroom and everything. Dean guessed he was on a hunt, something important. The CPS lady and the Maloneys naturally were all upset that Dad hadn't shown up. But Dean knew better. Dad was a hero and the bad guys didn't always show up when you wanted them to. He could hardly blame his dad for missing one little visit, when innocent people's lives could depend on it. Saving lives was much more important than seeing the essay that Dean had gotten an A on for school.
"Boys," oh shit, that tone of voice was never good. Joe seemed to be looking for the right words to say something.
"Just spit it out already." Dean said. He did have a tendency to talk before thinking, Dad always told him that.
"I'm sorry Dean, Sam. Something happened to your father. They think he was attacked."
And that's when Dean had dropped his fork and Sam had gazed up at Dean with those damn puppy eyes of his, and they both turned to Joe without a second though. "Please, can we go see him." Dean said just as Sam added. "What happened?"
Joe seemed a bit hesitant to say any more, but then….
"Your caseworker, she went to see your father, to see why he didn't show up. She found him in his motel room, severely injured. The police think… they think he might have been there for the past few days."
"But he's alive." Dean had whispered, almost too scared to hope.
"I'll see if we can get to the hospital to go visit him." No promises, but still… Dean lost all feelings of an appetite and brought his dish to the washer, before placing it in. Mike had stood there staring at Joe, as if he could somehow pull information out of him, just by looking at him.
"I want to come along." He said. Joe looked at Dean, Dean just shrugged.
"Just make sure you're ready, we're leaving in half an hour.
Sam ran up to the bathroom, Dean noticed him hurrying there a second too late and was banging on the door, demanding entry. Five minutes later, Sam came out, ready, Dean flipped him off and started looking for his hair gel. Sam'd better not have used any. Brenda had bought the tube for Dean, after Dean had asked for it. Brenda had said they'd be with Dad soon, that everything was going fine. And for a moment alone in the bathroom, with no one watching him. Dean had allowed himself to be a kid and cried.
He'd washed his face afterwards, too deeply ashamed of himself.
He was a Winchester and Winchesters didn't cry, especially Dean.
From: Anael, First Seraphim of the 10th Garrison
To: Michael, regent of , Zachariah, second seraphim and first Clerk of the 10th Garrison , Raphael, master of the storms and guardian of the prophets
Sent: sat, Apr 11, 1992
Subject: Urgent developments in the Winchester observation
My lord Michael,
The demons have gotten closer.
Please, I need permission to heal John Winchester, he may not survive without aid.. I do not know how long I can keep the children in safety away from him. And with Winchester out, the demons might decide to come after the children themselves.
Anael,
First Seraphim of the 10th Garrison
Daisy wasn't even sure why she stayed at the hospital. She'd already given her statement and it wasn't that she even liked John Winchester. But after the way she found him, she felt she had a … responsibility of some kind, some need to make sure he was fine and would survive before she left. She wasn't even sure why she felt that way.
When Joe arrived with the boys, she probably should have done something to stop them from going in. But what kind of monster would she be to do something like that. Regardless of her opinion of John Winchester as a father, he was still the only parent those children had.
She was just heading out of the room to get a cup of coffee when she heard a familiar voice, it made her hesitate for a second.
"So that's a deal?" The first voice asked. The instant response was a quick chuckle.
"Oh most definitely." Darren? "But you will keep your part of the bargain."
It took her a moment to recognize the man's voice, that lawyer, Wilker. She wondered what he was doing here. She knew she hadn't called him. She shrugged it off. It was probably a coincidence. He probably had some other client, ambulance chasers like that loved to prey upon places like this.
"Yes of course. You help me get rid of my burden, and I will allow you to retain the Righteous Man until he has broken the first seal."
Huh? What?
"No Zachariah, you would allow me that, regardless of our bargain. You want him to do so as much as I. No, once he is broken, you will allow me to keep him for at least ten more years."
"What?"
"What I want Zachariah, is some time to play. I want to mold your righteous man, to take that soul and make him mine, forever."
Wilker sputtered.
"Ten years, Zachariah, you will hold off your Garrison at least that long before they take him away from me. "
"And what will you do with him, while you have him."
Darren laughed at that, it wasn't the kind of laugh she was used to from the man, not full and unfettered, no, there was a darkness to this laugh, something… evil.
"Oh just a little song, a dance, a taste... Don't worry, my boy. I'll be gentle. I won't even leave a scratch"
"Darren?"
Darren didn't even bother pretending he was caught at anything.
"Daisy, my dear, my friend and I were just talking some business. How is our dear mister Winchester?"
"He'll live."
"Good, very good. It'd be such a waste if he died. Such a shame for those poor little boys of his." Darren looked away from her and through the open door, Daisy followed his gaze to the Winchester boys and felt her alarm bells going off.
She wasn't even sure what it was, that was wrong. He didn't even do anything suspicious, it's just, the way he looked at them, at Dean especially, almost proprietary. As if he were looking at a big candy cane that was all his. It made her want to take the boy and run, hide him somewhere so Darren could never find him.
Instead she turned her back on him and headed back in to the brothers. Closing the door behind her, she had to struggle the urge to lock it, put her back against it and barricade it to keep him out. Why? She didn't know. He hadn't done anything, hadn't said anything, had just…
Dean was holding his father's hand, his eyes never left his brother who sat next to him, clutching to Dean. They seemed so small. John was covered in bandages. Whomever had attacked him had gutted him and then left him to die, too weak to even call for help.
The one positive things from all this was that Winchester hadn't chosen to abandon his children again. Daisy had called his employer and once the situation had been explained she'd been willing to give the man another chance. You could hardly blame someone for not showing up at work, when they were attacked and left for dead.
She knew she should be leaving, give the kids some privacy. She knew Dean's glare at her pretty much demanded her to do so. But then she remembered that look in Darren's eyes. It didn't really matter what Dean thought of her, his safety is what was important and something told her, that if she left now, he'd be in serious danger.
Mike offered Joe to get some drinks, Daisy wanted to grab his hand and stop him, tell him to stay in here, where he'd be safe. But what could she say, that her boss gave her the heebie jeebies. That she thought the man who played Santa Clause for the office's Christmas party was a threat? And based on what? The look in his eyes, the notion that he made the hair on the back of her neck stand up? She had no proof, no real reason, so she kept quiet, but she left the door open on a wedge, to see if she could follow the boy. He almost ran into Wilker and Darren on the way to the soda machine, and then he disappeared out of sight.
Darren looked her way, as if he knew she was watching him. She quickly closed the door.
When the boy came back to the room, loaded up with sodas, she released a breath she didn't even know she was holding.
From: Anael, First Seraphim of the 10th Garrison
To: Michael, regent of , Zachariah, second seraphim and first Clerk of the 10th Garrison , Raphael, master of the storms and guardian of the prophets
Sent: mon, Apr 13, 1992
Subject: Urgent developments in the Winchester observation
Michael,
I pledge you milord, whatever you have been told, I am innocent.
Please my lord, I merely wish to fulfill the will of heaven.
Anael,
First Seraphim of the 10th Garrison
Brenda was scared. Joe was pacing the room. Mike had gone out to see a friend several hours ago and he still hadn't returned. Brenda had been calling around for two hours, it was eleven now and Mike still hadn't come home.
Dean sat on the stairs with Sam and Suzie, keeping them safe while Joe called the police for the second time. Still no news, but a police officer would arrive at any moment. If Dad weren't in the hospital, Dean was sure he'd have found Mike already. What if the thing that attacked Dad had gotten Mike as well?
He needed to salt the doors and windows, keep everyone safe, but Brenda and Joe had been sharing an 'keep an eye on Dean so he doesn't use up all the salt' watch. He'd tried to explain, that it'd had been the drugs, but they didn't believe it. Well at least Joe had let him put some salt in front of the windows and doors. Humoring him. It wasn't nearly enough, but better than nothing.
He turned off the radio just as they were reporting something about a meteor shower. Falling stars, spaceships like the loony on the radio tried to say before the host cut him down. Dean didn't care. All he wanted to know was if they were safe and where Mike was.
Then the door bell rang, Brenda almost ran up to open it.
Dean couldn't see who it was, nor could he hear them. But he could see Brenda's shoulders slag, he could see Joe running up to her, pulling his wife close towards him. Holding her.
The next few days were hell, in and out of the hospital. Mike lay in a bed, unmoving, his face was ashen. Dean's guts shuddered at the thought that he'd thought Mike was weird, that there was something wrong with the guy. The police was on the look out for the boy's father. Dean hoped they found him.
It took three days for Mike to wake up. When they finally let him, Sam and Suzie in to see the guy, Mike looked at Dean and Sam as if he'd never even seen them. Even though they'd shared the same house for over a month. The doctors said it was amnesia.
Sam looked stricken by the notion. Mike had been playing soccer with him, letting him win, so he wouldn't feel stupid. They'd sat over school work together. And now, all that was gone, erased into nowhere as if it had never happened.
In between Dad and Mike, school and afterschool stuff, Dean barely even had time to think about how much he hated being with the Maloneys. So he helped Brenda make lunch for Sam and Suzie, he helped Joe with the garden. He did his home work and he paid attention in class, because any of that was better than thinking about Dad lying in the hospital, clinging to life or Mike sitting in a chair, cringing whenever he moved and sitting there stunned, as if he wasn't even sure how to move anymore.
Brenda smiled at him when he helped her set the table without being asked. "Thanks Dean." She said, thankfully without hugging or any such nonsense as seemed to be going on between her and Sam. What was it with hugging? Sam better get that hugging thing out of his system now, cause, it was stupid and girlish and very un-Winchesterish.
He was really happy that she didn't try the hugging with him, that she knew better, really.
"Does the police know anything yet about who took Mike?" He asked, trying to break the silence. Silence sucked, he wished he had his dad's cassette tapes, so he could put on some music. Real music that is.
She tried to shrug off his questions, telling him that they were safe, that he didn't have to worry. But what if whatever came after Mike, was coming after them next?
Dean headed up to the older boy's bedroom. Mike was in his bed, the wall was covered with pictures of cars. Dean figured he might actually like the kid. If he hadn't been so weird.
"Hi."
Mike didn't respond. "I'm sorry about what happened to you." Dean said.
"Whatever." Mike mumbled.
"So what happened?" Mike glared and threw a pillow at him. Dean quickly pulled back. He should have just sent Sam, Sam knew how to be sweet and puppyish, people actually liked talking to Sam. He almost wished he had the old Mike back, at least old Mike didn't throw stuff at him, even after Dean attacked him with a knife.
From: Zachariah, First seraphim and first Clerk of the 10th Garrison, We have been betrayed. Anael has made foul deals with the inhabitants of the pitt. She has turned against heaven. Her life is forfeit. Find her, destroy her. Zachariah,
To: all
Sent: Tue, Apr 14, 1992
Subject: re: Urgent developments in the Winchester observation
First Seraphim of the Tenth Garrison, First Clerk of Heaven
*
She still couldn't believe it. She was at the office, trying to straighten up the mess the cops had left her with. They said they needed to check any file Darren had been working on. The idea that he had…
They found him two hours ago. Ten hours ago, he'd picked up a young boy, about thirteen years old. He told the foster parents that he was taking the boy to see his grandparents who had finally shown up.
The kid was only supposed to be gone for a few hours. A quick visit with people he'd barely ever seen before, get to know them before he had to go live with them.
The foster parents had been confused why they hadn't been warned in advance, but they figured that Darren would have told them if anything was wrong.
Five hours later, neither Darren, nor the little boy, Kyle, had returned. That's when the foster parents had called the office to ask them when Darren was bringing Kyle back.
But there were no grandparents, and Kyle's caseworker hadn't even heard about Darren handling the boy's case. Daisy had known something was wrong then. Things were off, she suggested to Lucy they might want to call the cops, ask them what they thought.
She'd still had no proof that there really was anything up with Darren, nothing but her gut feeling. It had been enough. The officers first checked Darren's place, no one answered the door. One of the officers had gone to the back of the house, looking through the windows. That's when he found them in the shed, or at least what was left of them. Darren's wife and his two kids. They'd been tied to some kind of contraption. Daisy didn't even want to try and imagine what they'd been through.
That's when the search for Kyle and Darren really got serious. Daisy had seen the pictures of the little boy, short brown hair, cute face, green eyes. Smart, tougher than he should have been. He looked a bit like Dean Winchester. After that she had no choice but to tell the officers in charge about her earlier feelings of fear when she'd seen Darren watching the Winchester boy.
Daisy hoped the Maloneys, nor any of their charges would ever even have to find out about the risk.
Kyle though. They found him, two hours ago at Darren's weekend cabin. They were only barely in time to save the boy's life. The only reason he wasn't dead, was because Darren hadn't had enough, just murdering him.
The boy, that had left his foster parents home laughing, making jokes, only a few hours earlier was now hanging on to life, unresponsive to anyone. His eyes looked like death and he flinched from any touch as if it came from a knife.
Darren, they told him to stop, told him to surrender, they had no choice but to shoot him. They emptied two cartridges in him before he went down.
Daisy knew her discomfort was minimal, especially in comparison to what those poor innocent children and Darren's wife, Sandy, had been through. She also knew that the officers had to go through all of Darren's files.
The man had gone insane, who knew what else he'd been responsible for. For a moment Daisy wondered about Mike, his mysterious attack. She was beyond prayer at this point.
It was then that she realized what else this might mean. A reexamination of any case Darren Meekis had been involved in, might cost the safety of dozens, possibly hundreds of children. How many of them might lose what little progress their families made, because some second rate lawyer comes up with an excuse why Darren somehow screwed up their parents case. No matter what the evidence might point to otherwise.
"Damn it Darren, what happened to you?" She whispered, staring after the police officers as they packed out box after box of files.
From: Jahi
To: Azazel, recipient of sin ,
Sent: wed, Apr 15, 1991 8:25 am
Subject: re: Urgent developments in the Winchester observation
Father,
And he has the guts to call me impulsive
Jahi
Dean wasn't even sure what had happened. Sam and him and been brought to the hospital, Brenda had told them something, but he hadn't quite understood what it was that she'd been saying. All he knew for sure was that they were going to see Dad.
Dad sat in his hospital bed when they came in. The caseworker wasn't there and Sam was holding tight onto Brenda who let him hug her, telling her everything was going to be alright.
"Dad." Dean whispered.
"Dean." And that's when Dean forgot all about being a soldier, about being tough and not letting anyone see how weak he really was. Instead he ran up to the bed and fell into his father's arms. Crying. "I thought we lost you." He kept repeating.
Dad was still a bit dazed, but he seemed to need to hold on to Dean as much as Dean needed him. Brenda was heading towards the door, leaving the room, leaving them.
"Brenda?"
"It's alright, Dean, I'll be waiting right outside."
But Dean didn't want her to go, he wasn't sure what he wanted.
"Everything's different now, Dean. You and Sam can go back to your dad, once he's released from the hospital." Dean stared at her in disbelief, he still couldn't believe it when she told him about Mr. Meekis, the head of the local CPS, who'd murdered several children in his charge and who'd apparently had had an unhealthy interest in Dean himself.
Right now the authorities couldn't keep the real evidence in their case apart from whatever fake evidence Meekis might have put in to discredit Dad. So as a result, their case had been dismissed. They were going back home, back to Dad.
And that was good, Dean wanted to go home, he wanted to climb into the Impala and be with his dad and back to normal.
But then he looked at Brenda and he knew he was going to miss her, Brenda, Joe, Suzie, even Mike. The new version of Mike wasn't even that bad, just different from old Mike. Dean had kinda liked going to school here, which surprised him, because he hadn't liked school since forever.
Dad or the Maloneys. There was no real contest, Dad needed him. He just hoped Sam would understand that.
"Thank you." He said to Brenda, he didn't make it clear what he was thanking her for, but she got it anyway. She didn't say' you're welcome' though, she knew she didn't have to. She was smart that way.
From: Azazel, recipient of sin
To: Jahi
Sent: wed, Apr 22, 1992
Subject: re: Urgent developments in the Winchester observation
And that my dear,
Is exactly why I didn't give you control of this situation.
Did you really think I wanted the boy anywhere other than in his father's hands? Why in our Lords name would I want the care of a human child, spend the effort on training him, when it suits our resources far more to allow John Winchester to do the job himself.
Especially when the man is doing everything we want him to do. He doesn't even realize how much he's turning the child into everything we want Samuel to be.
Let him take the boy hunting monsters and ghosts and whatever foul thing we share this world with.
By the time Winchester's through with him, Sam will rebel against his father and Dean… Dean will do everything he was destined to do.
Stay out of business you have no notion of, Jahi, and let the adults handle things. Or I will send you back home kicking and screaming if I have to.
Azazel
Carl was in the kitchen while the twins were arguing over some party. Daisy sighed and put down the final folder she'd been working on. She wondered sometimes, why she kept doing this job, why she kept trying. What use was it to keep on going in a job that no one appreciated. What difference did her involvement make in the long run?
She was barely even watching TV, channel surfing from fashion to some cop show when she nearly skipped over it, some special news report. She wasn't even all that interested. The only reason she stopped zapping was because Carl asked her if she wanted something to drink. She turned her eyes back to the TV and put the remote on the table, Carl hated it when she kept switching channels. He said it gave him a headache. The reporter was talking about how the hostage situation had been going on for several hours now. It was all the way in Milwaukee. Mike came in with the wine just as the reporter got all excited. One of the bank robbers was bringing out a hostage, an older man that was quickly led to an ambulance. The bank robber stared at the camera, fear in his eyes, as if he'd only now realized just how fucked he was.
There was something familiar about him, about his face, something she remembered. The eyes, maybe? The camera focused on him to as much of a degree as it could manage. She kept watching, hoping for answers. Carl knew her by now and didn't even ask what was wrong. He just held her in his arms and let her enjoy his presence. The moment seemed to last, but in reality it was barely even a few seconds before the strangely familiar man slipped back inside the bank.
It took more than an hour before the answers came, the bank robber was already on the FBI's most wanted list. A serial killer. They said that at least three people died in the bank, one of them halfway skinned while she was still alive. Daisy stared at the images on screen, pictures of some of the man's victims from St Louis.
She had to close her eyes, hold her breath to keep from throwing up. Violence was not her thing, she could barely stand to watch it. Yet… why did that face seem so familiar?
They said his name a couple of times before she realized where she remembered it from.
Dean Winchester. Dean Winchester, violent monster who'd murdered three hostages, in a bank robbery where he didn't even take a single bill of money.
The face snapped in focus with that of a young boy she'd known over a decade ago. Little Dean Winchester and his guns, a terrified big brother who just wanted to keep his little brother safe. Who saw his father as a hero, and wanted to be just like him.
The reporters talked to the FBI agent chasing them, trying to make him look like a fool for letting him slip between his fingers. But she could see that look in the man's eyes, driven, annoyed with reporters who just didn't get it, who wanted to push him into a role that didn't fit him.
Dean Winchester, a little lost boy, probably abused by his father. Told over and over that he was a soldier, that he was responsible for his brother. That nothing he did would be good enough. Who never had a normal life. And she'd lost him, she could have helped him, could have saved him, but she failed. Darren's insanity, and all that had followed it had ruined her case with those little boys. She'd had no choice but to let them go right back to their father, back to insanity, right back to … this.
Had that helpless little boy that was too scared to ask for help truly become a monster? If she'd managed to save him back then, what kind of man would he have become? How many people would still be alive? And where was Dean's brother, what had happened to little Sammy who so much wanted to be normal?
Dean Winchester, serial killer, bank robber, madman. And it was in part her fault because she hadn't saved him when there'd still been time to do so.
She started crying, too broken to do anything else with her failure. Carl once again her only lifeline.
The end