Sorry I'm taking so long to update. This is more of a half chapter that a full one. But it more intense than the others.

Sara sat in the large tree and had hung her basket on a branch near her thigh. It was not ladylike to be up a tree. Mama would not be happy. Except Mama and Papa were not there to stop her. No one was there for her. She was utterly alone. The threat that had been given of the home guard coming to investigate had come to nothing as of yet but they were still wary. But as December had swooped down on them as they had not celebrated All Hallows and she was checking up on a clump of mistletoe that grew half way up an old tree within a mile of her house. It was growing much colder and it was growing harder to ignore how the soldier shivered from the draught by the door.

"Sara, what are you doing?" Startled, she almost fell out of her place, only managing to grip the wide branch in front of her at the last possible moment. "I'm sorry." She shot an angry look down at him.

"I'm wondering whether to collect this mistletoe or not, it seems smaller than the last few years."

"Why didn't you use a ladder?"

"I don't own one and the only saw I got is shot. So I can't make one."

"Could you come down, you're making me nervous. I have to talk to you."

"What's so important that you have to tell me on the ground?" She paled. "IS it the baby?"

"What? No. He's sleeping." He frowned. "I'd just really rather prefer it if you came down here so we could talk face to face." He slipped his hand into his pockets awkwardly, then slipped them out again. She rolled her eyes and began the awkward process of descending the tree in a dress. She would have worn breeches if she dared. She was around ten foot off the ground when her foot slipped and she found herself dangling from one arm off a branch that creaked ominously. When she had fallen she had slipped too far away from the tree to swing back easily. She managed to grasp it with her other hand and tried to edge along toward the trunk but there came a very loud crack and the branch began to come away from the tree. She stilled in horror as it have a final snap and she was free-falling. She let go of the branch and closed her eyes, preparing for impact. It did come but was not nearly as hard as she imagined. She opened one eye and looked up into the face of the soldier. Relief washed through her before she saw the look in his eyes. There was a fierce sort of look that was somewhere between anger and adoration. She thought he would say something, instead, he let her down and began to walk away. Flustered, she spoke in haste.

"Say something, you can't just look at me like that and not say something." He turned around and seemed to make a decision. He darted forward and scooped her up in his arms, he gave her an intense look before capturing her lips with his. His arms tightened around her. She found her own arms sliding around his neck. There was far more passion in her own kiss than she would have ever expected. She knew she should be angry with him and herself but at that precise moment she didn't care. He broke away as fast as he had embraced her but he did not let her go.

"I'm leaving. That was what I meant to say. I just wanted to do that once before I left." He took a breath. "I must leave before the snows come. I mean to join my regiment again if I can. That is if had no reason to stay." He looked into her eyes for something. She looked at him with incomprehension.

"What would you stay for?" He let her go abruptly. Disappointment was clear on his face. She realised her mistake too late as he returned to the house.

"I'll be gone before the snows. It is best, just in case the men find me here." She thought of calling after him but wasn't sure that she wanted to. She sighed when she saw that her basket was still nestling in a branch far above her reach. Well, leave it there. She would leave her other problem to ruminate too.

Jack paced back and forth. He would not return to the cabin yet. So, he contented himself with digging up potatoes. He had meant what he said. He knew that she was mistrustful and conflicted. Behind all the sadness, he saw something else, he could almost call it guilt. What would she feel the need to be guilty? He didn't want to leave her but it was becoming more and more likely that his side would win the war. If they found him here. If he didn't have any reason to put his life on the line, he'd best find one of his party and try to think up a story involving his comrades that didn't get either him or Sara hanged. The pile beside him was rapidly rowing and he had better stop himself before he unearthed Sara's entire winter stock. He dropped the spade and took an armful of potatoes. He hadn't thought to bring a sack in his haste. He stomped back towards the cabin. He bagged up the potatoes and dumped them on top of the corn. Sara sat by the fire. Her arms were crossed over herself. She made a vague motion in lieu of a greeting. She didn't look at him.

"Did you mean what you said?" He nodded quietly. "I think that if it's the best thing then you should go." She bit her lip but didn't turn her gaze away from the fire. Jack looked down.

"Will you do something for me? Tell me that you want me to leave."

"What?" Sara froze, her head darted to look at him in shock.

"You heard me. Tell me that and I'll leave."

"Why do you want me to … What can that possibly achieve?"

"It will give me the revolve to leave."

"Do you want to go?"

"You're avoiding the question."

"Why are you doing this to me?"

"Because I need to know."

"I don't want..." He turned his head.

"What don't you want?" He held her gaze.

"I don't want you to go." She sighed.

"But do you want me to stay?"

"I..." He walked toward her.

"What is it that is holding you back Sara? Is it your husband? You know, you mustn't let him keep you from living your life."

"It's not that." She looked down. "There's something you don't know."

"What, what is it? Did those bastards hurt you?"

"No, nothing like that. Look, you don't understand. When I said that Inman, the deserter, shot you in the back, I lied. It was me. I was angry and protecting my boy. I didn't know what you did. I thought you were like them." He was backing away. "Jack, look at em, all I can say is that I'm sorry." When he did look at her, it was clear he was angry and hurt.

"So, it wasn't out of the goodness of your heart that you helped me, it was guilt. I knew there was something you felt beside mistrust but I didn't realise it was this. How could you look at me and smile. Instead of sadness she found that she was getting angry.

"You didn't give me much choice. You come in here with your rapist friends and bash your way into my home and my head and... I made a mistake. You don't know how difficult it was to convince myself not to leave you for dead. I needed to protect my baby. And yes, I hid it from you. I knew you would react like this or worse. I tried to patch up my mistake as best I could. It happened and I can't change that. Don't make me apologise for protecting my family. I just, I can't.." She sank down to the ground. With horror, she found that she was crying.

"I'm sorry that I've been such an inconvenience." His face was firm.

"Don't do that. You want to know everything. I care about you. I didn't want to. I was going to send you on your way none the wiser once you were well but you had other plans. Why did you keep pushing? Why do you keep tormenting me? I don't deserve this." She was sobbing loudly now, using her sleeves to mop up her tears. "III have been through too much." Through her fingers, she saw his shoulders slump.

"Gah." He made a sound somewhere between anger and exasperation. He stood up and the boards creaked beneath his feet. She looked away. He pulled her hands away from her face. "Don't you see it, Sara? I've been falling in love with you from the moment I saw you. I've hated myself for not trying to help you when they … I was a coward. I suppose I deserved to be shot. I just wish you could have been able to tell me." He grasped her hands. Sara looked at him through red – rimmed eyes.

"Why did you have to say that?" Sara looked beseechingly at him. Jack, rubbed her hands and moved his hands to her face. He kissed her before pulling her into his arms. Her breathing returned to normal eventually. "You took the wind out of my sail a bit. How can I be angry if your being so understanding?"

He shrugged. "What are you going to do?"

A loud knock came at the door.

"Sara? You there."