Whichever nanite came up with the idea that EVOs should be able to make slime deserved to be disassembled and tortured until it's itty-bitty brain couldn't function anymore. Rex spent ten minutes trying to get his squelching slime covered self from the street to the back of the trailer – and this after he'd been goo-glued to the naked ex-EVO. The field agents thought it was hilarious, Rex couldn't say he agreed.

After the smelly and uncomfortable ride back to Providence, Rex spent the next two hours on the decontamination unit getting blasted with cold water until his skin felt raw. The slime came off but the smell remained. Desperate times called for desperate measures – in this case, flowery girl's shampoo and body wash that smelled like 'Mango Mash!' (both courtesy of Dr. Holiday).

Rex swore Holiday into not throwing out his clothes (he'd had his jacket for as long as he could remember – it had a lot of sentimental value! Plus his pants were just awesome.) Then he retreated to the safety of his bathroom.

The bathroom was by no-means extravagant. The floor and walls were the same boring white as the rest of Providence's corridors. The shower looked like a stall in a public toilet but it was clean and it was private. Steam swirling around him Rex stood under the jet as the slime-stink was overcome by the scent of wild-flower shampoo.

Most field agents had to live in the dorms with community bathrooms but Rex was Providence's secret weapon – and an extortionist – which was how he got his own bathroom with no security cameras looming outside the shower stall and no imminent threat of other people walking in on him if he chose to take the opportunity to masturbate. Which he did.

Rex slid his hand down his stomach, trailing fingers through the hair below his navel before taking the base of his shaft in his hands. He pumped himself a few times letting the pleasant tickle in his groin grow into a throb as his erection grew, hot and pulsing under his hands.

He held the base of his member in one hand and with the other palmed the head, shivering in pleasure. He pulled back his foreskin and gently stroked the crown with one finger as each little stroke made his breath hitch and heart pound.

He'd first started masturbating after waking up from a particularly good dream. He'd retreated to the bathroom, afraid that Bobo might wake up and see. Without any other thought of what to do with a boner he jacked off. After that first mountainous orgasm he knew he needed to do it again.

He'd started doing it a lot, sometimes twice a day until he actually got curious enough to go online to look for tips and found out it was better if you waited about five days in between; 'on the weekends' was suggested. Rex tried it out and found that the internet hadn't lied.

Rex groaned and pumped himself slowly, drawing himself out. Usually when he came to this point he would touch himself somewhere else like his nipples or balls to enhance the pleasure – today he put his fingers in his mouth and imagined Noah.

It'd been weird the first time he'd masturbated and thought of his best friend – weirder still that he was experimenting with anal at the time – but Rex had come to do it so often that he had a harder time climaxing if he wasn't imagining his sexy blond friend.

He sucked his fingers, running his tongue along them and imagining it was Noah's dick. He stoked himself faster, breathing heavy through his fingers and letting out small gasps and moans. He fantasized Noah's face, gold locks damp with sweat, his face flushed as Rex sucked him off. Fantasy Noah's hands tangled in Rex's short hair, tugging a bit. Noah threw back his head, a keen rising from his throat; Rex sucked hard, licking the tips then taking his fingers (fantasy dick) all the way in his mouth and sucked hard, swallowing to encourage an orgasm from Noah. Noah bucked against him, but Rex loved it and sucked harder and swallowed longer until Noah screamed and shot his load into Rex's waiting mouth.

As weird or gross as it might have been to a rational Rex, strung out Rex nearly came. He held the base of his shaft tightly, trying to hold himself back. He took deep breaths to let himself calm down before he moved on. He wrapped both hands around his dick and instead of pumping himself began thrusting his hips, screwing his hands and imagining Noah.

He didn't know whether to imagine Noah sucking or fucking, he preferred the sex fantasy, but was also much more ashamed of it – really, Noah was his best friend.

He thought of Noah's face as he went down on him. His eyes closed in focus, his hair falling in his face (God, Rex loved it when his hair swept into his face). He imagined Noah opening his eyes, looking up at him, blue meeting brown as Noah moaned around him. Rex was close. "Noah… ah... ah! Noah!" He fucked his hands and couldn't stop the image of Noah's body flush beneath him, dick bouncing as Rex pounded into him. Cheeks red and eyes glazed, his voice hoarse with lust as he cried out 'Rex!'

Rex jerked, his whole body stiffening "Noah!" he moaned and came hard into his hands. He stroked himself a few times, riding out the orgasm until he felt hot light fade to warm, content, and tired.

He stood in the shower, letting the water wash away the evidence and getting his energy back up. He looked down at the traces of white on his dark hands. He felt guilty for subjecting Noah to his fantasies, but even the thought of the blonde's nubile form began a familiar warmth in his stomach. Rex had been planning on going to visit Noah and playing some basketball – but he couldn't do that if he was going to get a boner just from guarding his friend. He sighed and reached down again. Sometimes he cursed his own stamina.