A/N: I've started writing a collection of songfics relating to the Jellicles. They revolve around songs from the Finnish soprano Tarja Turunen. This particular one is based of 'Wish I Had An Angel' which she sung with Nightwish before leaving the band.

Disclaimer: I do not own Cats, that's for T.S Elliot and ALW to tell you.

'Wish I Had An Angel' is written by Tuomas Holopainen and performed by Nightwish.

When she was younger, she had everything that any kitten could want. The grace of an Everlasting Kitten, friends that would do anything she asked and fur as white and pure as the snows of winter. She prided herself on these qualities, no one was ever going to be as perfect as her. Her attitude remained the same even up to the day of her becoming a full-grown queen. Once a Jellicle kitten has attended their first Jellicle Ball, they were considered to be grown up.

Victoria had spent many days and nights practising her angelic twirls, they were already quite good but not to her. They had to be perfect. She had to be perfect. No other kitten had taken nowhere as much time as she had for practising. Everyone knew whom he or she were going to dance with. Etcetera intended that Pouncival was her one tom and Electra often made googly-eyes at Plato. Jemima and Tumblebrutus had been caught kissing behind a tyre once by Jenny, resulting in a month's clean-up duty and a pair of eyes watching the two kits. Victoria only wanted someone who could come close to her level of 'perfection', she only wanted Mistoffelees.

She thought, no… she knew that they would dance together in perfect harmony and it would be the first time that she had taken a step outside of her innocent heart. She had never even touched one of the toms' paws. Let alone lips. Who knew that the one night would change the course of her life forever.

"It wasn't supposed to turn out this way!"

She stole away into the night quietly as everyone was watching The Glamour Cat rise to the Heaviside Layer. Sure it would've been ok to watch, but the public humiliation was much more dramatic. Just as she finished her dance, which she had spent weeks perfecting, he didn't come out to twirl with her. It wasn't her 'almost perfect' Mistoffelees. It was Plato.

"Doesn't he know the meaning of the word no?"

She had rejected Plato in front of all the kittens, she didn't care that he was the only one that had asked her to dance with him and she didn't care that the tears started trickling down his furred face. He wasn't good enough. Plato could hardy touch his toes, let alone touch them while doing the splits in mid air. She had always known that he 'loved' her but she thought that finally he had gotten over her when he asked Etcetera to dance with him instead.

She had stopped running, not because of the rocks under her paws or the blood tricking down her legs. It was because of the guilt inside her heart. She sobbed quietly as she recited part of an old poem that she once heard.

"Old loves they die hard,

Old lies they die harder."

It had been four months ever since he had asked her, her instant reaction had caused her to say no. She thought that he would leave her alone from there but part of her knew that he would still try to woo her anyway. Electra must hate her now, Plato was supposed to be her partner, and he lied to her. In fact, he has always lied to her. Such a careless, ignorant tom that thinks he can whatever he wants. Victoria never liked him all that much to be honest. To her, he was just a lying, rude tom. Nothing more.

If it couldn't get any worse, the sky began to release its downpour. Victoria sighed to herself, "I'm cold, wet and just plain scared."

The night continued to make strange noises that the pure white queen had not heard before. The creaking and crashing around her put her on the edge. When something fell behind her, she ran. Victoria didn't care where to but to what she thought was safety.

Plato sat there alone, flicking his tail. He wondered what had happened that would've scared her away, surely it couldn't be Grizabella. She had been gone for nearly a whole year, soon the next Jellicle Ball was just around the corner. Plato didn't talk to the other young adults as much anymore, or to anyone as a matter of fact. He stayed by himself, his own way of mourning for Victoria. He hadn't sung or danced since that night. He tried to write a song for her but he couldn't get past the first three lines.

"I wish I had an angel,

for one moment of love.

I wish I had your angel…"

He couldn't bring himself to continue it, mere words cannot express the true beauty of an angel. Or so he thought…

She was know a fully-grown queen. Victoria's height had become stable, she wasn't having growth spurts anymore and her voice had now lost the kitten-like innocence that it once held inside it. Her coat was no longer as white as the first snows of winter but stained with the dirt from her roaming. She had travelled countless miles in her time alone. She stumbled across a small town at one point, extremely dirty and quiet.

Hiding in the dark shadows, she knew what she must do. Steal. If you had asked her to a year ago, she would've hissed at you and told you to stop accusing her of crimes but now, she had no other choice. She wasn't all that talented at it to begin with but still she tried, even with a broken ankle and wrist. Limping silently, she managed to take a small sardine from the tin that some thoughtless human had left unguarded. She never understood how they were just so… ignorant and selfish.

As soon as she managed to steal into the shadow behind the house again, she saw a small face. A small ginger kitten looked at her pleadingly, eyes fixed upon the tiny fish which Victoria held.

"Why would I care if you little brat can't find something for yourself?"

She hissed at him scornfully but he still sat there, staring at her paw and the sardine. Suddenly becoming over-protective of her meal, she ran up to the young ginger and slashed his face with her claws. It was her only meal for a week and no one was taking it from her. Recovering from her attack, she walked back to the fish but she fell. She had become frail and weak, nothing like her former self.

"I'm going down so frail and cruel,

drunken disguise changes all the rules."

All she could do was sing softly to herself, it was dancing that ruined her life and she had sworn never to dance again. She wished that someone would come and save her, anyone at all.

This was the final remark that Tumblebrutus would say about her.

"How dare you call her a pitiful, little perfectionist!"

Plato ran up to him and threw him to the ground, calling out several nasty insults to Tumblebrutus while doing so. Plato's mind had been corrupted by the guilt and shame about him making Victoria leave forever. She was his world, now that she was gone. Nothing mattered anymore.

"Plato. All you wanted was Victoria. She would've been your prize of the night!"

Tumble jumped back up and slashed Plato's left cheek. This caused him to push him back to the ground and he mauled Tumblebrutus' right ear. Jemima had come running through, trying to pull Plato off her mate but struggled in doing so. Electra cried out for help but no one seemed to hear.

"Brutus, you are a hypocrite, wannabe friend! You betrayed me for nothing. You are too stupid to see the pain I went through mourning her and all you can do is laugh at her!"

Alonzo had come sprinting down with Etcetera behind him. Munkustrap had lost his life fighting against Macavity three months ago and the Jellicles were still mourning but Alonzo had a duty to do. To keep peace.

Victoria was still lying in the shadows of the town. Her health had gone into a downward spiral, barely letting her stand up without support. Her life was worthless. A useless, shameful life filled with lies and heartbreak. She should just as well end it now. She stopped believing in angels and hope long ago.

Slowly she managed to limp her way to the front steps of the wooden house, there had to be something to end her misery. She looked around and saw a small bottle, it had a dark liquid inside of it. She bit the top off and slowly lapped up its contents. Soon it had all gone and as she left to return to her hideaway, a paw touched her shoulder. Surely it couldn't be him…

"Victoria?"

He stood there stupidly, trying to figure out if the cat was actually her. Plato could recognise those eyes anywhere and her fur was almost white, just with dirt and dust patches covering it but she still looked beautiful to him.

"Plato. I haven't seen you ever since the Jellicle ball."

Victoria dropped her head down guiltily, he must have given up his life to find her while she had given up hers to get away from him.

"Please just leave me. I am hideous, I have lost everything. My friends, family and I cannot even bear to dance anymore."

He just smiled weakly had took her grey paw into his brown one. He rubbed his head against her paw and arm gently, just like he remember doing almost a year ago.

"May I have this one last dance?"

Victoria just stared at his pleading eyes, she thought that she at least owed it to him. It was only a single dance anyway. Slowly she lifting a foot off the ground and Plato took this gesture as a yes.

The two Jellicles twirled around each other, the surroundings soon disappeared into a vortex of colours.

"Last dance, first kiss."
She whispered softly into Plato's ear a moment after he had lightly pecked her lips. She held a paw gently to his face, feeling the warmth flow back to his cheeks.

"Your touch, my bliss."

He replied softly as they danced further into the evening. Nothing could change the way he felt right now, this was the perfect night for him. All until…

Victoria stopped dancing all of a sudden and stared into Plato's eyes. They were filled with an unusual happiness but she did plan to end that. She held a hand on her heart and wept.

"Plato. Do not look for me. I plan to leave forever."

With this statement, she ran the best she could away. Plato started to run after her but he stopped behind the shadows the house. Her body laid there limp and motionless. He picked up her body and carried it away, weeping for his lost love.

While the Jellicles were dancing to the Rum Tum Tugger's song, Plato limped in, holding Victoria's angelic body.