#

#

God, Sam smells so good.

He nuzzles up under the long dark hair, lips brushing the soft earlobe, inhaling the scent of him, the tang of sweat mixed with fresh soap, the sweet honey of Sammy underneath, the dirt and grass that surrounds them, and he fills his lungs with it, wants to remember this moment in time forever.

Listening to the delicious gasping filling his ears as Sam recovers from orgasm, his chest rising and falling beneath Dean's, trembling finally slowing as his brother stills and rests, their breathing matching now, slow steady pulls between them.

Wants to stay here forever, just like this, breathing in his brother's smell, feeling that wonderful warmth underneath him but his dick, man-

It's not liking the wait, throbbing at him in his pants, almost painful now and Dean moves his hips in, pushing his aching cock against Sam's, hoping Sam'll get the picture, remember that he didn't get off and really needs a little action in the downstairs department.

He pulls the earlobe into his mouth, sucking, nipping, breathing out his brother's name, stirring the hair gently, "Sammy."

"Dean. You said…just once." Sam's voice sounds off, not loving or happy or sated, but hoarse and raw, the words muttered into the air, dropped like small bombs waiting to explode.

There's tension humming through Sam's body underneath his but Dean's a little slow, still lovingly licking and sucking on Sam's earlobe, "Mmmm?"

He feels the wedge of hands in between them and before he knows it, he's given a fierce shove and he lands hard, a painful jolt screeching up one hip-

Ow, that freaking hurt!

"Sammy, what the-?" Dean's up on his knees, rubbing away the bruise he knows he's gonna have and staring after Sam in confusion because now what the hell is wrong?

But Sam is already up, scrambling away, yanking up his pants and tucking his dick back in, his back to Dean, shoulders slumped, dejected-

Shutting Dean out, curling into himself, staring at the ground, clenched fists against his thighs, back rigid, stiff and cold.

"Sam? You-you ok?" He gets to his feet, tentative because hell, no, Sam's not ok, his whole body is screaming with it but Dean can't for the life of him figure out just what the hell went wrong in the space of two minutes.

Sam spins around suddenly, making him jump and shit, his face-

His eyes are glaring wounded, mouth twisted in hurt, the anguish in his expression cutting at Dean's heart and he's reaching out, doesn't know what's wrong but needs to soothe, to stop Sam's pain.

His hand is slapped away and Sam's voice is snarling pissed, shaking with anger "You said-you said you needed to have me just once. Just once. What the hell did you mean by that, Dean? "

Dean can feel his frown deepen because he's not getting the problem here, "Sammy, what-?"

Sam cuts him off, tone rising up an octave, cheeks flushed with rage, "I'll tell you what you meant! That you're gonna be fucking stupid again, aren't you? Tomorrow, you're gonna let the goddamn guilt back in, let it eat at you and tell yourself how wrong, how perverted you are and you're gonna deny this again, deny me again, just like before!"

He's shaking his head before Sam even finishes talking, cutting him off, because Sam's wrong, he won't be that way this time, "No, Sammy, not this time, love you-"

"Yeah, like you loved me before and you still shut me out, turned your back on me, man and it hurt, Dean, hurt so bad, it ripped me to shreds and tore me up inside because I loved you so much and you didn't care, it didn't matter what I felt, what I needed. You just ignored me, pretended that night never happened between us and you expected me to go along with it!"

Sam's blinking fast, a fist rubbing at one eye and Dean knows he's fighting tears, his shoulders hunched up around his ears, the memories slashing over his face, lining it deep with old hurt that cuts him through even now, "I would have done anything for you, Dean, anything you asked but you just…fucking…left me. Didn't ask me what I wanted, didn't listen to me or care that I was dying inside, nope, all you cared about was doing what was expected, what society said was right and you turned your back on me, on us and sliced me wide open and I-"

He gestures helplessly into the air between them, the tears breaking free, sliding down and he slaps at one with his palm, "I wasn't ever the same, Dean. You took everything from me that day, ripped out my freaking heart and I never even knew why. Well, now, I'm asking! Why, Dean? Why did you do that to me, to us?" And a sob breaks out of his throat, his voice torn raw "I just want to understand why-"

#

He closes his eyes against the pain in Sam's voice, the memories so bright and sharp, it rolls through his chest, the pang of it wrenching at him and he's back there, suddenly, in the heat of the cabin, the smell of Sam's come all over his fingers, the taste of his brother in his mouth, staring into the huge soft eyes that are just as freaked out as his own.

And the shoot of absolute terror that filled his heart shook him, right to his core because he could see the future and it scared the crap out of him.

Having Sam, like this, every day-

Falling deeper and deeper in love with his brother, losing himself, settling in, becoming complacent-

Useless as a hunter, useless as Sam's protector because fear for Sam's safety would paralyze him, make him unable to do the job at hand and he would make bad choices, jeopardize both of them and he couldn't take that risk, had to take care of Sammy, keep his edge, his skills honed. It was his job.

No, he couldn't let himself have Sam like this.

So he'd turned away.

Hadn't wanted to do it, shit, every single shred of himself had screamed and raged against it, his heart kicking his ass six ways from Sunday but there wasn't any getting around it, it was for the best, at least that's what he told himself, it was the only decision that was right and sound, goddamn it!

Knew it was the right thing to do but it ripped him to pieces, brought him to his knees and broke him, in ways he couldn't even begin to understand.

Seems he broke Sam as well. So much for Dean always knowing best.

He'd screwed them both up, turning Sam into a pissed-off, angry young man who could barely stand to be in his own skin, snarling and growling at everything that got in his way-

As for himself, well, he'd buried it so deep in his gut, it festered, rotted, poisoned him from the inside out, sucking away his hope, his dreams and he'd taken it as his just due, it was what was supposed to be for his world.

Just another slice to his heart, another cut to his soul, this one the deepest yet because this was Sammy-

His everything, his world.

Almost got Sam killed because his brother had kept his feelings a secret, had to, because Dean wouldn't let him talk about it-

And he'd been callous and cold, ignoring every plea of Sam's eyes, every soft touch, each muttered whisper of please, Dean, please, can't we talk about this?

God, he'd been such a bastard, so goddamn sure, so righteous!

And look what he'd done to them-

Both broken, hungry and raw, scared to love, to admit their needs and weak, so freaking weak without each other.

#

He shakes his head wordlessly, staring into Sam's tear filled eyes, "You'd never understand, Sammy-"

And he starts to turn away, only to be jerked around by an iron grip on his arm, eyes flying to Sam's, his brother's angry gaze locked on his, "Oh, no you don't, Dean, you're gonna talk, right now! I've earned the right to know...that psycho almost killing me gave me the right!"

He tries to shake him off but Sam's having none of it, digging in with his fingers and getting right up in his face-

"Tell me, damn you, you owe me that much!"

Grits his teeth together, firms his mouth because he can't tell Sam about how weak, how afraid Sam makes him, he just can't-

How thoughts of them together for good, for life, fill him with stupid hope, ridiculous because he can never have that happiness, he's a freaking hunter, a Winchester and they don't get the happy endings.

And Sam's face crumples at his resolute look.

He releases Dean abruptly and stumbles away with a broken sob, "You-you son of a bitch, I knew it! You never felt the same for me, you were just playing some sick freaking game!"

"Sam, wait!" Dean's lunging for him, trying to stop his brother from bolting but Sam slips through his fingers, twists away-

"Where the hell are you going? Sam, please, just give me a goddamn minute here, would you? I need to think!"

But Sam doesn't turn back and he's moving fast, like he's desperate to get away.

Keeps his head down, shoulders hunched like he's a beaten pup, waiting for the next blow to come, pulling deep inside himself.

Dean hesitates for a single breath, a slice of fear lurching through and then he's dashing after Sam, catching him just as he passes the car, heading for the road-

Hauls him around by the arm and Sam swings wild, landing a solid punch just under the cheekbone, "Lemme go!"

He sees stars for a second, the shooting fire in his jaw has him shaking his head to clear it and the flick of anger shoots through, right down to his toes because his little brother just goddamn pegged him.

And Dean's punched Sam before, hell yeah, to take him down and show him who was in charge-

But Sam doesn't hit him, ever-

He grabs Sam by both shoulders and picks him up, lifts him clear off the ground, muscles screaming in protest as he shoves him back and Sam hits the Impala hard, jolting the breath out of him, the pain of impact shooting sharp through his eyes-

"Get your fucking hands offa me!" Sam's already pushing and shoving-

"No! You're not going anywhere, Sam!" And Dean crashes in with his body, hitting hard and jarring bones, muscling Sam back, pinning him in place-

"You had your chance to talk, Dean. Now I know how you really feel, let's just forget the whole thing, huh? This time, I'm denying you so no, Dean, we're not gonna goddamn talk about it anymore, it's over and done with and we'll just pretend the whole freaking thing didn't happen, ok? 'Cause that's what you do, right? You ignore and close your eyes to what's standing right in front of you, making stupid decisions that hurt people! And then you never learn 'cause you're gonna do it again!"

Sam shoving against him, bucking his chest, his hips into Dean's, trying to get him off," I don't want once, Dean, I want it all, want you, all the time and I won't settle! And you have a goddamn nerve, man, thinking that just once was gonna ever be enough for me! Now let me the fuck go!"

And Sam is struggling hard now, Dean wrestling him back as much as he can but the goddamn kid is strong, wiry and he's got four inches on Dean and about twenty pounds, freaking mighty as an ox and it's only gonna be a couple more seconds before he gets free-

"Son of a bitch, Sam, it wasn't. I couldn't." He bites his lip, doesn't want to say it but before he knows it, before he can stop it, he's yelling the words into Sam's face, needs his brother to goddamn understand- "I was freaking terrified, ok?"

And it's out now, stark and raw, and it rocks Sam back, stilling him, a twitch of air trembling between them as they both realize what Dean just said.

"You were-" Sam mutters it back in wonder.

"Damn it! This thing, man, this thing between us is so fucking strong, it just took all my strength, my will away and all I wanted was to have you, stay with you, forever, always, knew if I did, I'd become…happy. Knew I could be so happy with you, being with you, like that, all I ever wanted and how could I keep you safe, keep you protected if I was acting like a love-sick fool, following you around like a hungry puppy, begging for every touch, every kiss. You-you're everything, Sam, my whole world, and I love you so much, I could lose myself in you,and then I'd be worthless, no good to you and you'd be vulnerable, wide-open to attack and if anything happened to you, I'd be…God, it would kill me." Dean gestures helplessly into the air between them, all fight gone, wide opened and exposed, "Couldn't do that to you, put you in danger like that, it was my job, Sammy, had to protect you, take care of you, keep you safe! Couldn't let myself have you, it was a…it was a dream, a wish I didn't dare let in."

Dean squares his shoulders and glares at Sam, gritting his teeth on the words, growling them out because his stupid brother made him tell, made him reveal, "So, you can think whatever the hell else you want to but you do not get to think that I was playing a game, or fucking with you. I love you, Sam, and I want you and yeah, if I thought this thing between us endangered you in any way, I'd do it again, deny us both because you matter more than anything!"

He gives Sam a hard shake, "You get me, Sam? You-you matter more than anything and I don't want you to ever forget that."

They blink at each other, the tense air heavy between them, the pulse of frustration shivering through and Sam is searching his face for truth-

He stares back, stripped bare, defenses gone-

"You-you were protecting me?" Sam's voice is a whisper, a breath of wonder, of realization ghosting across the air and Dean's heart beats faster, a thread of hope surging through.

He nods quick, "I was trying to, seems like I didn't do a very good job of it because I hurt you so bad."

And his brother's eyes are locked on his, soft love rising up, replacing the mistrust, the hurt, almost glowing at him, and Dean can't breathe with how Sammy's looking at him right now-

Sam's shaking his head, "We're not gonna do this, not unless you tell me it's for good, for ever, no going back. Can you do that?"

"I can't promise you that. If being with me hurts you in any way, we're stopping it."

And Sam is blowing out a frustrated breath, "Goddamn it, you're making me crazy!"

He starts to speak but Sam's hands are suddenly wrapped around his head, holding him in place with a fierce grip, and the mouth that lands on his is crushing, Sam's teeth smashing into his and he tastes blood just before he's shoved open, the tongue swirling in like hot fire over his, taking his mouth in a brutal kiss, no soft love or tentative touch anymore-

Nope, Sam is taking possession, making him, owning him.

The palms around his face are hot iron, the mouth on his sizzling hot and Sam's not letting him go, not letting him breath, just keeps plundering his mouth, tongue shoving into him, arousing him easily, helplessly-

Dean fights against it, tries to keep control, keep hold of his will but the kiss scorches through him, lighting him up, tearing his walls down one by one, until he's shaking with effort, his resistance ripped away by Sam's delicious tongue-

And it's too much for him, can't fight anymore, the thin fray of his self-control finally snaps-

He gives a whimper of release, letting the guilt, the fear, and the shame be ripped away, cleansed by Sam's mouth, his love and he relaxes, opens up, letting Sam have him all, falling in harder than ever-

And the kiss changes, brute force sliding into passionate hunger, the hands surrounding him loosen, caress instead of grip and Christ, Sam's a good kisser, pulling sparks of fire up from his balls and Dean can't get enough of this, enough of that wonderful tongue, that taste.

He's shoved away suddenly, his mouth still chasing after Sam's for a minute, bewitched and fuddled in his brain from his brother's freaking scorching kisses-

Sam's voice is hard as stone, the words absolute, final."You are not leaving me again, Dean, I not gonna let you so you're just gonna have to get used to me kissing you, loving you and…"

He raises an eyebrow, looks up and down Dean's body with lust blown eyes, lip curling suggestively "Touching you everywhere I want, whenever I want. Is that clear?"

And the flush of heat that shoots through his body at Sam's look leaves him trembling, panting with desire, "God, Sammy."

Sam's mouth swoops back in, hovers just over his and the breath on his is hot and sweet, "I said, is that clear?"

He slides his hand up around Sam's head, pulling him down, aching for his kiss, "Fuck, yes."

#

He's gripping the steering wheel so tight, his hands are cramping up, knows if he lets go, they're gonna be shaking and he's sweating, can feel it sliding down his back-

Holy fuck-

Can't get to the motel fast enough-

Glances over at Sam who smiles at him sweetly, all dimples and teeth and his foot slams down on the gas-

Can't wait, can't wait-

After his little declaration, Sam had pulled him in again and covered his mouth in another kiss, but this one was gentle, cream and honey, opening him slow and easy, taking his time, the delicious slide of Sam's tongue fluttering up against his own, flicks of desire zinging up his spine at the taste-

The flavor of his brother rocking through, the twist of tongue in his mouth making his cock achingly hard again and yeah, ok, he can get used to this, if Sam insists-

Who the hell is he kidding, he wants this forever, for a life time, not just once, not even twice-

Always.

When Sammy broke the kiss, nuzzled their noses together and whispered to him, he'd turned into a puddle of twitching arousal fast, the seven words rocking his brain, his world-

"Want to feel you inside me, Dean-"

He'd jerked back, sure it was wishful thinking, certain his brother hadn't really said what his hopeful ears had heard-

"Sammy-" He can barely squeak it out-

"Please, Dean, I've waited so long for this, for you. Don't make me wait anymore."

Can't hardly stutter out the words, "Fuck, are you-are you sure, Sam?"

And Sam's hand had swept down, cupped his cock hard through his jeans, "Been sure for goddamn years-"

How he'd gotten them into the car, he had no recollection, just a sense of hurryhurryhurry that surged through, and before he knew it, he was squealing away, driving hell bent for their motel and trying not to cream in his jeans at the thought of what waited for him there-

#

He manhandles Sam out of the car, into the room, half-carrying, half-dragging and Sam is laughing that he can walk, goddamn it.

Gets them inside and slams the door shut, muscles his brother back against it and takes that sweet mouth as his own, pushing into Sam's eager mouth with his tongue, twisting and sliding, fighting for top, needing to dominate, to possess-

And Sammy opens up for him, lets him, gives a satisfied hum as Dean dives in deeper, takes control and holy Christ, Sam tastes so damn sweet.

Breaks the kiss for a second to rip off Sam's shirt, can't wait to goddamn have him.

And then he's back, can't stop kissing those soft lips, can't get enough of that essence, the delicious, tantalizing, luscious flavor that swirls through him, dizzying his brain and stealing his breath away.

Gasps out the words, "Get these things off-" even as he's plundering Sam's mouth, hands scrambling between them at his brother's jeans and the zipper is stuck, locked in place and not giving, goddamn it, and he rips at it, fingers working it and finally, fucking finally it slides down-

He shoves Sam's jeans down and his shorts, too, and the hard cock is bobbing between them now, standing at attention and raring to go and Dean fists it in his hand, gives a pull up, the gasp of delight that falls out of Sam's throat filling him, making him feel huge, strong-

"God, Sammy, God…" He can't help himself, needs to taste those goddamn nipples.

So delicious, the way they harden in his mouth, become tight buds of pleasure and Sam is arching towards him, wanting everything Dean gives.

"Jesus, Dean, feels so good-"

Sweet words that drive him on, needs to own, possess-

Bites and licks at one pebbled tip while he rolls the other between his fingers, keeps going until Sam is stuttering hard, shivering under his mouth, begging for more-

Can't wait any longer.

Releases the delicious nub and he's pulling Sam forward, urging him down onto the bed and when Sammy looks at him, eyes tear-filled and shining bright, Dean pauses, heart giving an uncomfortable thump because what if Sam changed his mind-

"Sammy, what?" Dean's breathless, scared shitless because he doesn't think he can handle it if Sam refuses him now.

His brother swallows hard, shakes his head, "I just can't believe I finally get to have this, it's like I died in that cavern and went to heaven and this is it, everything I ever wanted."

And Dean can't help himself, has to kiss-

He takes Sam's mouth soft and easy, hands sliding over muscled chest and down, circling over the hard abdomen, sweeping over the satin below-

Breaks the kiss and growls into Sam's mouth, "Fuck, I love you."

And he whispers the rest, lips close to his brother's ear, "I'm gonna make you feel so good, Sammy, want to give it all to you, everything I wouldn't let myself have, want to touch you, taste you everywhere-"

"Want you to come all over my hand when I'm buried in that sweet ass of yours."

And Sam's blinking up at him, mouth hanging open, a wild heat flaring up in his eyes and he's pulling at Dean's hips, begging him to hurry, please, Dean, hurry.

Dean stands up, yanks off his t-shirt and tosses it over his shoulder, shoves down his pants and underwear, kicking them away, hard cock falling out, thick and dripping between them-

Sees Sam's gaze lock on his dick and stay, a look of fascination, of hunger shining in his soft eyes-

Sam's up and crawling across the bed towards him, focused on his cock, honed in, "Dean, can I-"

And before he finishes the sentence, Sam's mouth is there, right there, wrapped around his length and it's hot and wet, sucking on him hard, pulling delicious grunting noises out of his throat-

Dean swears savagely, fighting not to come because it's the most freaking awesome feeling in the entire world, Sammy's tongue sliding and dancing along the bottom of his dick, the nerve endings there shooting flicks of heat with every drag on the skin-

Circling the head of his cock, slurping and sucking, filling the air with obscene noises that add to his pleasure and he's shaking with holding himself back, trying to stop himself from exploding into Sam's hot mouth-

"Jesus, Sammy!" His hands go to the mess of hair automatically, sliding through and gripping tight and he's bucking into Sam's mouth, can't stop himself, feels too good to push Sam away.

All he's ever wanted right here, right now, the sweet lips wrapped around his dick, Sam's ass for the taking, his in a few minutes and Sam's mouth working him so good, swirling and sucking, and God, can't take any more, the curl of orgasm deep in his belly, making his toes tingle and he's gonna come right now unless Sammy stops.

With a muttered plea, he manages to push Sam's mouth away, his brother moaning with disappointment-

"Don't-don't want to come in your mouth, Sammy, want to be inside you, filling you up-"

Drops to his knees on the bed and reaches for Sam, covers that delicious mouth with his own, tasting himself on his brother's tongue and he knows he should feel dirty, filthy but he doesn't, doesn't care anymore, wants to be immersed in it, covered with it-

He tangles his tongue around Sam's, swirling under and dancing over, until they're both moaning with desire, rubbing against each other, cock on throbbing cock and damn, that feels nice-

Breaks the kiss and spins Sam around, urging him down onto his hands, wanting that beautiful hard ass splayed out before him.

Spits on his fingers and slides down the crack between Sam's ass cheeks, finding the puckered hole and pressing in, spreading the wet around before slipping in, one finger into Sam's entrance and circling gently-

Sam groans in pleasure, a throaty sigh of satisfaction, and pushes back against him, wanting more.

He slides in a second finger, feeling the heat in Sam's ass wrap around him snug, like a second skin and he can't wait to feel that around his dick-

Tries his best to open Sam up, moving his fingers back and forth, opening and closing the gap between them, stretching out the twitching entrance but he's worried, Sam's still so tight and he'll hurt him, if he tries to take him now.

Pulls out his finger and spits on them again, working in more slick, tries for a third finger but Sam's muscles are clenched, not giving at all-

Does the only thing he can think of to relax him, spreads his fingers wide and bends in, licks around the quivering hole with his tongue, hearing Sam's gasp of pleasure as he lets the taste slide into him and it's dark heat, musky sweat, swirling around in his brain and Jesus-

Tastes so sweet-

He settles in, hardening his tongue and pressing forward, using his fingers to stretch Sammy wider, while he sucks and licks, taking his time, opening up that delicious entrance with little pushes and pokes-

Gets the third finger in and he's searching, reaching, trying to find that one spot-

Sam jumps, legs thrashing suddenly, "Jesus, Dean! What-what is that?"

Dean smiles, face still buried in Sam's ass, found it and presses again, rolling the bud of nerves between his fingers, hearing Sam's shouts of pleasure as he shoves his tongue inside of the clenching hole-

"God, Dean, now, need you now!" Sam's whimpering, ass rolling and tossing, trembling as he begs and Dean is up behind him in an instant, spitting on his cock and nudging forward, getting the head inside and pressing in, past Sam's trembling muscles-

A rush of breath comes out of Sam and he's trembling, holding himself stiff, rigid-

Dean gives a shove and he earns another two inches but damn, Sammy's tight, his ass is clenched hard around him, feels like he's trying to cut off circulation-

And Sam starts babbling, twisting his body to get away "Dean, it's too big, can't take it, please-"

He's rubbing Sam's back, soothing circles over the clenched flesh, "Shhh, Sammy, it'll be ok, breathe, breathe-"

And Sam's trying, huffing out his breath like a steam engine, trembling with reaction and Dean waits, petting his brother the whole time, kneading and rubbing the tense muscles, muttering hushed words into the air over Sam's back, "Love you, Sammy, you feel so good around me, so tight and hot, God, what a gift, man, everything I ever wanted right here with me now."

And he feels Sam's muscles start to loosen and give, and he pulls back slightly, pushes in again, gains a few more inches before the muscles clamp down around him, stopping him cold and he groans at the tightness-

Hopes he gets all the way inside of Sam before he's shooting out his load because right now, it'll only take one more clench of Sam's hot channel to fling him right up to the stars.

"Fuck, Dean-" Sam's panting, squirming, "It burns, man-"

The tight grip loosens and Dean pulls back, thrusts again-

Fighting for every inch, going slow and steady, soothing Sam with words, with his hands and finally, finally, hitting bottom, buried deep and Christ, if that isn't Eden, Utopia and Shangri-fucking-La all swirled in together-

The heat wraps him like a second skin and it holds him so good, makes his cock freaking twitch and pulse, scared if he moves, it's gonna be all over because he's so close, so fucking close-

He pulls out slightly, reaches between them and squeezes the base of his cock hard, stopping the orgasm because there is no way he's coming now, not when he's got heaven snug around him, hot and trembling, just waiting for more-

"You-you ok, Sammy?"

"God, feel so full-" And Sam clenches around him, wiggling his hips and making Dean inhale a sharp breath, "It burns like hell, man, and you're goddamn huge but Jesus, feels so good, so right having you here, inside me, taking me, just perfect…"

"So good, Sammy, love you, love this, everything I ever wanted, right here, right now."

And Sam pushes back against him, "Dean, please,need, God, need you to-"

Dean's hands are shaking, holding onto Sam's hips, trying to hold back from thrusting in hard, wants this to last, wants to bring them both there for as long as possible and he's pulling all the way out of Sam's sweet hole, slow and easy before pushing back in, the sharp jab of it making Sam gasp out his name and moan with pleasure.

Does it again, sinking in so deep they're both groaning with the sweetness of it and Dean could just die right here, right now, and never want for anything else again-

He tries changing position on the next thrust, because he wants to find Sam's prostate again, send him to the moon while he's fucking him into the mattress-

"Come on, where are you?" He's muttering to himself, pulling back on Sam's hips with every shove forward-

Sam's head snaps back suddenly, "Jesus Christ!" and he's shoving himself back eagerly, meeting Dean's thrusts right there, wild and out of control, "Holy shit, Dean, harder, need-"

Badda bing.

And Dean reaches under, grabs Sam's shoulders with both hands and hauls him up and back, so he's sitting on Dean's dick, on his lap and it sinks his cock in even deeper if that's possible, Sam squirming with the burn but he's rising up and dropping down, breath hissing out of him as he rides Dean hard.

"Jesus, you just keep hitting that spot, driving me crazy!" Sam's gasping with each hard shove in of Dean's dick, twisting his hips and bucking rough, and he's barely able to hang onto his writhing brother-

Wraps one arm around Sam's waist and grabs hold of his dick with his other hand, starts stroking up and down, loving the sounds being wrenched from Sam's throat, "God, Dean, feels so good, so fucking good, can't, unngghh, that's, ahhhh-"

And he's pounding into Sam's ass, fierce jabs up with his hips, making Sam yelp with pleasure, driving himself into that hot hole as deep as he can, so sweet it's an abyss he's drowning in and his fist never slows, drags up and down the satiny flesh of Sam's dick, jerking hard.

Sam's working his dick so good, slamming down onto him, meeting him there shove for shove, grinding himself down to get Dean in deeper, give him more-

Making him see fireworks behind his eyes, bursts of light that feed the fire in his balls, in his belly and there's a fist there, trembling nerves, steamy heat rolling through, bubbling and rolling, a pressure cooker that's gonna blow any second now-

And he's climbing fast, so goddamn fast, the narrow heat surrounding him turning him to steaming puddle of twitching flesh, all feeling and smell and sound-

The musky scent of Sam and him together, filling his head, the slip-slap of flesh on flesh and Sam's gasps of bliss, his cries of love and his own grunts and groans as the orgasm curls in his gut, the length of his brother's hard cock throbbing in his stroking hand, so hot, so good-

"Fuck, Dean, gonna-" And Sam stiffens, pulses in his hand and everything clenches around him as Sam explodes, shoots his load out all over Dean's hand-

And that's it, can't hold back, reaches the mountain top and flies over the edge, his balls drawn up tight, his cock throbbing and he gives one more dizzying shove before he bursts, erupts, filling Sam up with his seed, wave after wave of it rocking through him-

And he's almost sobbing now because he's all Sam's, given him everything and loves him more than life, taking to the edge of the world and beyond-

Sam is his now.

And now he knows how it can be for them, and who the hell was he kidding?

Won't ever be able to do without this now-

Holds on tight and feels the grateful tears slide down his cheeks, because he's been given one more chance at this and this time, he's gonna do it right-

His heart is pounding, pulse racing and he can't slow down his breathing because that was the biggest orgasm he's ever had in his life right there-

"Dean, Dean, you're, God, love you, man, everything to me, just, everything I ever wanted, thank you, thank you-"

And he's whispering back, heart too full to be ashamed of weakness, "Thank you, Sammy, for letting me, so sweet, so perfect."

When he pulls out, Sam gives a wail of emptiness and reaches back, tries to pull him in but Dean rolls him over, takes his mouth to hush him and kisses softly, gently, taking his time-

Sam pulls back, fearful, "You gonna leave me again?"

Makes a promise to his brother then and there, means it with all his heart, "Never, Sammy. Never again. Gonna stay with you for good, for keeps."

#

"So, you think there were passengers on that train?" Sam's voice is low, a soft chuckle buried inside and Dean blinks in surprise because he hadn't thought about it, hadn't even considered-

Was too caught up in his baby brother's sweet cock to care one way or the other but shit, if there were people riding by, they got a eyeful.

A laugh barks out of him, shocking them both because it's loud and joyous, not Dean's laugh at all and damn, he's freer than he's ever been, glad to be alive and here, with his beautiful brother-

And he's winking at Sam, "Must have been at least an engineer there…maybe that's what all the damn whistling was about."

They'd fallen asleep wrapped around each other, showered when they woke and now were devouring a delivered pizza-

Maybe." Sam snorts, grins at him, reaching out to wipe off a smear of tomato sauce from the corner of Dean's mouth, bringing the finger to his own to lick away.

It's such an intimate gesture that it catches Dean's breath in his throat, fills him with wonder and hope and a memory floats through, out of his mouth before he can stop it.

"You know the day you got taken, when I went into Bernard's shop?"

Sam nods, gaze locked onto his, "Yeah."

"You were both laughing at something and…I'd never seen you laugh like that, sure as hell not with me, you were so relaxed, at ease and when you saw me, you stopped instantly, like I wiped the joy right out of you. Fucking hurt like hell, man. I-I want you to laugh like that with me, Sammy."

Sam looks down at his pizza, then back up, the fear in his eyes catching at Dean's heart, "I felt at home with Bernard, maybe because he was out and proud of it, he made me think that anything was possible. You were my joy, Dean, but I couldn't have you, so every time I looked at you, I felt…empty and cold, almost black inside. That's what I lived with, every day, since that night we had together. I wish I could say it didn't matter now, that everything's forgiven and forgotten but I can't. I'm scared that it'll happen again and not sure if I can ever trust this-" He gestures between them, "I'm trying but it's hard."

Dean looks down at the slice of pizza he's eating and tosses it back in the box, appetite gone. He rubs a shaking hand across his face and then he's on his knees in front of Sam, hands cupping his brother's face, "I'm so sorry, Sam."

Sam's lower lip trembles and his eyes fill with tears, he's struggling like hell to hold them in, swallowing hard and he's shrugging, mumbling, "Doesn't matter any more."

He gives a small shake, "It does matter, it matters a lot! Gonna show you, Sam, how much I love you, not going anywhere, ever again, you're stuck with me and I'm gonna be right here for as long as you want me."

He leans in, licks away a tear that's rolling down Sam's face and presses a chaste kiss onto the soft mouth, "Love you, Sammy, won't leave you, I swear it."

Rocks them together, whispering it over and over, his promise, his oath of truth to his brother, "I swear, Sammy, I swear."

Sam gives a half-sob, "When I was woke up down there, in the caves, I knew I was dead, knew it from the look on that guy's face that he was gonna make damn sure I didn't walk out of there and I held off for a while, against the drugs, wouldn't tell him what he wanted to know but then I thought about you and how I'd never see you again and-"

Sam shakes his head, "I just wanted you to know how I felt, so you'd understand just how much I love, have always loved you, like that, like I shouldn't. I wanted you to remember that night with me and to know how much it meant. You, that night, it was magic, the happiest I've ever been."

A hand slides around Dean's neck, pulling him forward and Sam's whisper reaches his ears seconds before his mouth is covered in a deep, scorching kiss, "It's still magic, Dean."

Dean meets him there eagerly, opening up for his brother's tongue and kissing back just as fierce and when he's pushed backward, Sam's hands sudden and frantic, he lets himself be manhandled, leans his head back and gives Sam easy access-

Hot kisses are being pressed all over his face, earlobe nipped with sharp teeth, bruises sucked into his jaw, his throat, and then his nipples, shit-

Sam's attacking them like he's a starving man, sucking first one and then the other, biting and licking in turn, pain first and then sweet pleasure-

Turning Dean rock hard in seconds-

And he's gasping with the pleasure rushing through his chest because Sammy's working him good, flicking his tongue over the tight nub, shooting tingles all the way down to his balls, making him arch up into Sam's mouth, begging for more.

Sam's mouth and tongue work down, leaving hot wet trails crisscrossing his ribs, his belly-

His jeans are ripped off fast, Sam's hands tearing at them, shorts dragged down and tossed aside and Christ!

A hot wet heat is surrounding his balls and he hears the slurping, feels the tongue rolling first around one and then the other, working his sac so good, so fast and Dean hears himself wheezing out nonsense words, just trying to hang on because Sam's moving like there's no time and he's got to get Dean off now, right now-

The mouth is sliding down his cock now and he groans with the goodness of it, Sam's tongue flicking along the underside on the down swing, dancing over the head on the sweep up and damn, can't hold his fucking hips still, they're rocking and bucking in abandon, out of contro.

The climb up is so fast because Sam's mouth is freaking sucking hard, swallowing him deep into his throat and he's twitching with nerves, spasms rocking through with each swirl of Sam's tongue, with each hard pull of his mouth and he's fucking humming, the vibrations rolling through his dick, shooting Dean higher still and suddenly his orgasm is right there, right there-

"God, Sammy, gonna, gonna come!"

And Sam's mouth is gone, leaving Dean thrusting into space, whimpering with reaction-

Pleading with Sam to come back and finish him, pulling at his brother with grasping fingers, "Come on, come on-"

His voice fucked out and weak, body boneless and when his knees are pushed up to his chest, his heart starts hammering in his ribs because damn, Sammy's gonna-

Feels the hot wet of Sam's tongue licking and dancing beneath his balls now, getting closer and closer to-

With a shout of pleasure, he stiffens as Sam's tongue flick over his puckered hole, fluttering up and down before hardening, working it's way inside with stiff pushes and that's liquid heat, steamy fire that sets his insides shaking and turns his bones to jelly.

And he's shaking, quivering as Sam works his hole, sucking hard over it and then blowing hot air, making the muscles clench and release-

Fingers work their way in, two of them, Dean thinks but his brains not really working too good right now, everything's concentrated down below and damn, that feels so good, Sammy has these long fingers that reach way in, circle around and his tongue is still there, poking in-

A jolt of lightening shoots through his belly, ice cold and shivering hot and he's jumping up, head snapping back because he's never felt anything like that before-

"Jesus Christ, Sam! God, there, right there!" And he's begging for Sam to just keep raking over that spot inside, keep working it-

When Sam's fingers pull out, he cries out in dismay, wants him to keep going, could stay like that for the rest of his life-

He hears Sam fumbling with his pants, the rasp of zipper and Sam spits, spits again and something huge and solid is pushing at his trembling entrance, spreading him open-

Sam keeps his hands on the backs of Dean's thighs, pushing them up towards Dean's chest, and now there's nothing in his way, Dean's spread wide, exposed and his virgin hole is being stretched apart by the biggest goddamn dick in the world-

He tries to hold it back, tries to breathe through it but it hurts like hell, like he's being impaled and hell, Sammy isn't even half way in-

"Jesus, that hurts! Ow, just, shit, Sammy, go slow, man, let me-" And his breath is wheezing out of him, he's almost hyperventilating, willing himself to relax and not clench, to let Sam in-

"Love you, Dean, love you, man…" Sam's hands roll in soothing circles on his skin and he responds, lets himself loosen-

Sam pulls back and gives a mighty shove and he's buried, all the way inside of Dean, the pain so intense that he can't speak, breath whistling out of him and he's hanging onto Sam's shoulders with a death grip, holding so tight he'll probably leave bruises but goddamn, that hurts like a mother-

Sam slides out and hovers for a moment, then thrusts back in hard, making Dean gasp-

Does it again and hits that spot inside and shit, that feels nice-

Makes the burning pain not matter because the pleasure is so much sweeter, so more-

"God, do it again, Sammy!"

And Sam pulls out, shoves in and Dean's bucking up towards him, begging him to go deeper, to give him more-

"Jesus, Dean, you're so goddamn gorgeous like this, opening up for me, wanting me, God, so tight around me, hot and mmmm, feels so good to be inside you, want to watch you touch yourself, man, want to see you come-"

And Dean reaches down, grabs his dick, fists himself, dragging the skin up and down while Sam pummels his ass, pounding in and releasing, zinging over his prostate with every thrust and damn, too much, climbing so fast, the rubbing inside him, deep and burning and hot, so hot-

"That's it, Dean, God, so hot, so- Jesus, love to watch you like this, open up your eyes, man, want to see when you come."

And his eyes snap open, cling to Sam's as the wave hits him hard, breaking through and crashing in, "Oh, God, oh, God, gonna come, Sammy!"

And with a choked holler, he's shooting his wad all over his hand and stomach, giant spurts of it landing with each jerk of his hand, keeps going, getting the last dregs and he's falling back, spent, exhausted-

And Sam's eyes are glued to his face, watching Dean get off seems to send him and he starts pounding into Dean harder, faster, filling him up so good, it's decadent, filthy and Christ, Dean just wants him to keep going, never stop-

Sam stiffens and Dean feels the pulse of dick in his ass, a quick jerk and then hot wet fills him, slicks him good and Sammy keeps going, pumping in and out until he's finished, spent and collapsing down on top of Dean-

Kissing Dean everywhere he can reach, breathing out the words into his ear "My Dean, all mine now."

Sam lifts himself up onto his arms and gives two more quick pushes in and out, making Dean cry out with a "Jesus, Sam!" and Sam's smiling down at him, pulling out his softening dick slowly, sliding down on the floor next to him and laying there, resting his head on his hand while the other rubs over Dean's belly with soft caresses.

He lets his legs fall and damn, his ass hurts like hell, reamed through and Sam's watching him like a hawk, eyes never leaving his face, he can feel it-

Glances over at his brother and their eyes meet and lock.

And Sam's eyes are huge, soft, the love for Dean pulsing in their depths, as he repeats the words, "All mine now."

The rush of joy hits him hard, overwhelms him because yes, just yes, that's exactly what he is and he leans over, kisses Sam's sweet mouth and breathes out the promise one last time, "Yours, Sam, always."

#

"Hello?"

"Is the the stunningly handsome Dean Winchester, brother of equally gorgeous Sam Winchester?"

"Yeah, who's thi- Bernard? Is that you?"

"It is, sweetie! I just had to call and check on my boys, see how everyone's doing?"

"We're good, Bernard, Sammy and me are good."

"Hmmm, you don't sound like yourself at all, usually you're all growly and angry but now you sound-hell, you sound happy, Dean and it makes me wonder just what you've been doing to get yourself that way? Makes me think maybe something's happened between you two..."

He blushes, clears his throat and stammers into the phone, hears the other man's delighted laugh, "You did it, didn't you! You and Sam got together? Oh, please tell me everything, darling, all the details!"

"Bernard, stop, man, I'm not gonna let you get your rocks off over me and my brother."

"Meanie! Just tell me you boys worked it out and I'll leave you alone."

Dean's watching Sam balancing the tray of food, carrying it to their table and he feels the stir of love in his heart, rushing through and he's nodding into the phone, staring at his gorgeous brother, the lick of arousal sliding on through at the sight of the hard, muscled arms, strong thighs, sexy mop of hair and big soft eyes he could drown in, "We- it's all good, yeah. It's...Jesus, Bernard, it's been the best two weeks of my life and I think Sammy feels the same."

Can't drag his eyes away from his brother's face and when Sam drops the tray of food on the table, he's smiling, dimples and teeth in full force and he shakes his bangs out of his eyes and sits across from Dean, lifting an eyebrow, mouthing the words, "Who is it?"

Dean mouths back, "Bernard." just as the other man is squeeling with glee on the other end of the phone, "Oh, that's fantastic! I'm so happy for both of you. Now, listen, now that you've both gone gay, so to speak, we really have to do something about your hair, and your wardrobe. Pink leather would be such a sexy look on you!"

"Pink-! Bernard, that's just sacrilege! Hmmm, but Sam does need a hair cut."

"Hey!" His brother's outraged cry has Dean laughing, "Bernard ain't touching this hair, I just got it looking good!"

"Tell him with a little gel, I can get his hair to look like mine." Bernard's laugh is wicked.

"Uh Uh." Dean shakes his head, "He'll punch me. Look, I gotta go, Sam's here with lunch and then we're hitting the road, heading west. We'll be in touch, ok?"

"Ok, give my love to Sam and Dean? I'm really, really proud of you!"

With another blush, Dean hangs up the phone, stares at Sam-

Who smiles back seductively, "See anything you like?"

He gives Sam a fake scowl, "Food looks good."

And Sam catches his lower lip between his teeth and Dean's eyes narrow there, watch as Sam's tongue slides across his lips and damn, Sammy knows what that does to him-

Jerks his eyes back up to Sam's and he's grinning at Dean, nods at him and slouches lower in his seat suddenly, "Mmm, it does. I was thinking more about this-" and Dean feels a warm foot settle over his dick, hidden from view-

And he's jerking back in surprise, swearing softly, making Sam laugh out loud as he curls in with his toes, rubbing and kneading-

Drops his foot and Dean can't help but complain, keeping his tone low so the other diners won't hear, "Fuck, Sam, now I've got a hard-on and we've got a goddamn case. You just gonna leave me here like this?"

Sam takes a bite of salad, chuckling at the look on Dean's face, "We got a couple hours drive ahead, figured I could take care of you on the road." He leans forward and whispers the next words, "See how good your driving skills are with my mouth wrapped around your dick."

Dean's throat is bone-dry at the image that just reared up in his head and he's shoving food in his mouth, eating as fast as he can, barely chewing before he swallows and as soon as he's done, he's up, grabbing Sam under one arm and hauling him up-

When Sam protests in a loud voice, "Hey, I'm not done yet!"

He leans in, growls low in Sam's ear, "Finish it in the car, man, you started this shit and now you can just eat me for lunch!"

And he's dragging his brother to the car, Sam laughing his ass off the whole way.

And Dean can't help but join in.

#

#

-end-