Random Roy/Ed smut just because we all love it...a bit of humor too ^_^ Disclaimer I do not own these characters.

Okay so it hadn't been the best idea the two had ever had but at the time logic wasn't playing the biggest factor.

Roy had stopped by the flat Ed rented in Central because his brother Al was visiting and so the blond hadn't been available to spend much time with Roy. While Roy realized the reasoning behind this, his libido wasn't nearly as understanding. Their relationship was still rather new at the time so I am sure one could guess how easy it was for the innocent kiss they shared in the entryway to turn into a rather heated exchange by the time they made it into the living room.

Roy had Ed backed against the wall kissing down the shorter man's neck when the first of few rays of logic assaulted Ed's mind.

"Roy we need to quit. Al could be back here any minute."

"I thought you said he left for the market?"

"He did but that was almost an hour ago," Ed replied.

"Well there's no harm with making out a little until he returns right?" Roy asked and immediately followed the question with a kiss.

Logic - 1 Lust - 1.

When Roy tugged Ed's tank top off over his head and tossed it somewhere in the vicinity of the couch so he could have access to his lovers abs, chest and nipples, Ed didn't protest. In fact, he had his eyes closed and hands tangled in Roy's hair as the man sucked one pert nipple into his eager mouth.

Logic - 1 Lust - 2

Bodies and actions growing more heated by the second Roy peeled out of the upper half of his uniform with practiced ease. Never breaking the delicious contact his lips had on Ed's flesh as he did so.

Logic - 1 Lust - 3

Roy slid his hands down over Ed's narrow leather clad hips hooked his thumbs in the belt loops and pulled the blond away from the wall…it was preventing him from getting his hands on the round firmness of Ed's ass after all. With Ed's left buttock in his right hand and his left splayed across Ed's back, Roy planted another soul-searing kiss on his lover's mouth.

Logic - 1 Lust - 4

Desperate to get his hands on more of the man kissing him, senseless Ed's fingers traveled to Roy's belt and started undoing the buckle. Sliding the leather out of the loops Ed turned his attention to the button holding Roy's pants closed.

"Uh Ed you do realize if you do that then it's gonna be really hard to st…" Roy's words trailed off into senseless drivel as Ed slid his finger down the length of Roy's cock.

Logic - 2 Lust - 5 (first tie round of the match folks)

Ed freed Roy's erection and was on his knees sucking it into his mouth before Roy could protest further. His knees went weak and Ed leering up at him through impossibly long blond lashes wasn't helping matters.

Logic - 2 Lust - 6

At some point Ed had stopping sucking on Roy long enough for Roy to free Ed from the restraints of his own pants. Ed was sprawled on his back in the hall, golden hair fanned out around him displayed before Roy like a vision…a vision he was hell bent on consuming.

Logic - 2 Lust - 7

Crawling slowly up Ed's body Roy used his tongue to taste and tease every inch of flesh he could reach. Once he reached Ed's face the two laid there in the hallway, erect cocks pressed together kissing passionately and grinding against each other.

Logic - 2 Lust - 8

As Ed moaned Roy's name into his mouth Roy began groping around in his discarded clothing pile on the floor. He knew there was oil in the pile of blue cloth somewhere. Once he found the bottle, the sound of him popping the cap snapped Ed back to reality.

"Fuck we…we can't do this now," he said as he sat up causing Roy to move back so he was on his knees.

Logic - 3 Lust - 8

"You're right I don't know what came over us," Roy said as he sat down and ran a hand through tousled black hair.

"You'd think we hadn't seen each other in weeks," Ed said as he tried to catch his breath.

"Well seeing you isn't the problem," Roy panted, "it's doing other things that has been in short supply."

"Well it won't be like this for much longer," Ed said as he crawled over to Roy, straddled his lap and kissed him.

Logic - 3 Lust - 9

Ed naked and erect on Roy's lap silenced that voice in their brains that had told them being naked in the hallway was a bad idea just moments ago. Passion renewed, the pair resumed their frantic grinding from a moment ago.

Logic - 3 Lust - 10

Completely consumed by desire once more their lips met and the lovers forgot the world. Roy had both hands planted firmly on the floor providing him with enough leverage to thrust his hips upwards as Ed rolled his in erotic circles.

Logic - 3 Lust - 11

Ed bent over Roy's lap with his rounded ass up in the air like a bad little boy about to receive his spanking. Unable to resist the temptation Roy smacked each firm globe a couple of times. Once Ed was groaning good and needy, just as Roy liked him to, he coated two fingers with lube and began stretching Ed.

Logic - 3 Lust - 12

More than done with the foreplay and prep work Ed pushed Roy down until he was lying flat on his back. He hovered over Roy's erection and lowered himself down slowly until his lover was buried balls deep inside his body.

"Fuck Ed…damn you're tight."

Logic - 3 Lust - 13

Facing Roy and looking into lust-clouded eyes Ed began riding him with a slow steady rhythm. Enjoying every brush Roy made against his prostate Edward Elric was in no hurry but his lover had other ideas. Grasping Ed's hips Roy began thrusting up as fast as his position would allow. While this was driving Ed mad, he gave Roy a curious look.

"We need to finish up before Al gets back," Roy panted.

Ed was about to agree when a voice said, "That would have needed to happen sometime before you were spanking my Brother on the ass General."

Logic - 3 Lust - 14

If Ed could have crawled into a hole and died in that moment, he would have done so with a smile on his face. There he was naked in the middle of the hallway, with Roy's cock up his ass with his little brother standing somewhere behind him. He looked down into the equally mortified face of his lover and Roy could only cover his flushed face and groan.

"Uh Al…you see…well I, we were…we…"

"Oh there's nothing wrong with my eyes and ears Brother I could see and hear what you two were doing rather well. You should be happy I didn't bring company with me."

"If you are done laughing at my expense, is there any way you could make yourself scarce for a few minutes, Al?"

"Why be so shy now I walked right in with crinkling bags and all and I'm sure I saw everything both of you are trying to hide now so…"

"For fuck's sake Al just go check the mail or something so I can put my clothes on, take a shot of scotch and come up with a way to pretend that my little brother didn't just walk in on me having sex in the hall! Is that too much to ask?" Ed asked loudly as he fell forward onto Roy's bare chest and buried his face.

"Sure thing, Brother," Al replied and both men heard footsteps headed toward the door. They heard the door open and they were waiting for the telltale click of it closing when Al said, "Oh and General that was a great stretching technique, I'll have to give that a try next time I see Fletcher. Ciao guys take your time I'm gonna go grab some tea from downtown and shop for a while."

The door closed and Ed was just about to say something to Roy when the door flew back open, "I trust you are joining us for dinner right General?"

"Of course Alphonse wouldn't miss it," Roy replied as he continued to stroke his mortified lover's hair.

"Good answer," Al said with a smile on his face, "I'd like to hold a decent conversation with any man brother deems worthy of giving head to. Have fun!" With that said Al was finally gone.

Ed opened his mouth to say something about smart-ass little brother's when something dawned on him and his eyes went wide.

"What?" Roy asked curious as to why Ed looked like a deer caught in headlights.

"Al said he came in when you were spanking me right?" Ed asked and Roy nodded, "Then how in the hell did he know I gave you head?" Roy's face quickly mirrored Ed's before he shouted. "That sneaky little fucker…he was here the whole goddamn time!"