Chapter 1-Snake's Submission

(A/N: I spoke to MikeJV37 and he said I could use the bloodline from Harem Dojutsu in my own way for my own version though I named it differently. Thanks again buddy! ENJOY!)

It was another wonderful day in Konoha. The sun was shining, all the birds were singing, and the bees were buzzing. It was another day of the usual normal routines where the last loyal Uchiha of Konoha secretly looked at naked picture of boys to masturbate his tiny dick to in order to handle his morning wood ritual. The Hyuuga Clan members were all stuffing their asses with Fate loving ego sized sticks like they do every morning with one of its female members being known for her shyness being the exception, and woke from her dream of a blonde boy named Uzumaki Naruto now up to face another day.

Speaking of Uzumaki Naruto...

"Kami I hate this fucking headache!" said one eleven year old Naruto from within his apartment while on his bed while grumbling about the fox screwing with him.

Yes. That's right. Naruto knew about the fox. Kind of hard not to after the two met when the boy was five years old after some jerk tried to kill him for the one hundredth time in the last two Months with a lead pipe. Of course, while unconscious from the attack, it gave Kyuubi temporary control of the boy, and the fox took that opportunity to take his own pound of flesh from the stupid human.

Or rather half the man's body before leaving what was left to be eaten by hungry animals.

After that happened, Kyuubi took the boy's body home, and sat it right on the bed before retreating back into the mindscape of the child to explain a few things. The boy's parents, to the events leading to the sealing, and the real villain responsible for the fox's attack years ago on the Leaf.

In truth, Kyuubi thought Naruto took it pretty well considering the kid was so young, and having this dumped on him. All Kyuubi had to pay was hearing the kid let out an angry pain filled yell at the injustice done to him that caused his ears to bleed for over an hour.

Since then, Naruto had been trained in secret by Kyuubi in a few things, and had taught the boy to keep it a secret just in case some people in Konoha learn of it. Not that what Kyuubi taught the boy was harmful, but rather a means to survive in Konoha, and not take so much of their shit. Kyuubi taught Naruto how to read, write, and math for when buying things at stores that Naruto sensed would treat him fairly.

That was more of a gift on Kyuubi's part in sensing these things, but still a valuable one nonetheless, and it served Naruto well. Another thing Kyuubi did was purge the signs of malnutrition from Naruto's body using his chakra with what little could be given due to the seal limiting the amount, but what was given was enough to do the job, and Naruto not eating ramen constantly under the fox's advice helped too.

"Relax kit. You know its just me tinkering with your eyes a bit. Calm down. Besides, what I've been doing will give you a needed edge in surviving Konoha, and can be used in interrogating enemies via hypnotic suggestions/commands while forcing their will into submission when in your presence. Though personally, I would prefer it used on the hot bitches this village has to offer, and make them your sex slaves," said Kyuubi letting out a perverted giggle making Naruto sigh before shaking his head and letting out his own little perverted giggle.

Did we mention that the fox was a pervert? Well he is one and he passed that onto Naruto along with his ways of knowing women.

First thing was all women, according to Kyuubi's point of view, were all crazy bitches in some shape, or form. There were the loud crazy bitches, the silent crazy bitches, and then there were the kind of bitches who were hypocritical. To men no matter what the male gender does, if a man lies to a woman, then they're considered scumbags, and if a man tells the truth then they are still considered scumbags.

Just honest scumbags.

Second thing was to beware of feminist women, who hate men, and want to break every testicle on every man in a 20 mile radius of them. Personally, Kyuubi had nothing against equality, but if a woman kicks a guy in his sperm makers just because the guy is a guy, then she's going to get a hit of her own in retaliation either to her face, or get one mean titty twister with a nice clamp on the nipple while it was still twisted for good measure.

'Its bad enough I'm well endowed for my age thanks to you, but getting a bloodline like that isn't something I'm looking forward to explaining in front of the old man, and then coming up with a reasonable lie to get him off my back,' thought Naruto, as he blamed Kyuubi for being well hung at such a young age after purging the malnutrition from his body, and the occasional healing done with the excess chakra slipping into his limbs to strengthen them further.

"Oh please! We both know you would have been well endowed even without me sealed inside your body. I just...sped up the process. Besides, you should be glad to have such a thing between your legs now, and know how to use it after learning from my years of experience in pleasing the female gender," said Kyuubi giggling perversely again.

'Like any girl much less a woman in Konoha would want me for such a thing,' thought Naruto, as he went to his bathroom, did his morning ritual of cleanliness, and then got dressed for a day of learning at the Academy.

Well...if you could call what they taught at the Academy a form of learning. They mostly taught history, some minor Academy Taijutsu, and basic Ninjutsu that would need honing by parents wanting their children to be the next Hatake Kakashi.

Naruto didn't have such people to guide him...except Kyuubi.

'Not according to that Hyuuga girl I saw the other day secretly using her eyes on you and then get a mean nose bleed seconds later. But then again, I could be wrong, and that dear boy is where your new bloodline is going to come in,' thought Kyuubi with a grin on his face knowing when push came to shove his vessel would do what needed to be done regarding these uptight, unsatisfied in bed, and crazy bitches within Konoha.

Unaware of Kyuubi's line of thought, Naruto headed via rooftop to the Academy, and prepared for another boring day at the Academy.

(Later that Day)

"Well that was a complete waste of time," said Naruto to himself since it was nothing new to learning what he didn't already know and once more the teachers were trying to sabotage him.

All in all nothing knew.

"Shame you can't bring any kind of evidence to the Hokage about this. He'd be able to help you then. For what little help he's provided anyway," said Kyuubi knowing the old man had been able to give Naruto little to nothing in terms of a decent life being the fox's vessel.

And don't get him started on overhearing the argument on what to do with Naruto once they learned of his status. All the "Kill the demon!", "Turn him into a weapon", and so on was really getting old for the fox. Seriously, why couldn't they just leave him, and Naruto alone to do whatever they want?

Oh yeah, Kyuubi was a demon, and humans can't stand demons despite humans being considered far worse at times.

Hypocritical bastards.

'How's the bloodline coming along anyway?' thought Naruto deciding to speak within his mind knowing to do otherwise in public would turn heads his way more then necessary.

"Almost done. You may feel a small stinging sensation right about...now!" said Kyuubi before completing his task and connected his masterpiece to the boy's biological data.

Naruto winced in pain at the sudden rush of nerve receptors in his eyes caused him to not see straight, which at the time could not be worse, as he bumped into the one person in Konoha, who had a life almost as shitty, and was currently having her happy time ended by the Kyuubi vessel. Her name of Mitarashi Anko, who was the former failed student of the traitor Orochimaru, and was part of the I&T department while being the second most feared interrogator in the Leaf. At the moment of Naruto's wincing, he had bumped into Anko currently eating some dango from a bag she bought at half prices thanks to the very rare coupon she acquired from Ibiki, who gave it to her for some overtime she did, and now that bag of dango along with the one in hand that was her favorite flavor was now on the ground.

Before a bunch of stray dogs got to them.

"NOOOOO!" yelled Anko in a dramatic fashion.

"Ow! What hit me? Damn it Kyuubi. The pain in my eyes won't let me see straight," said Naruto to himself before seeing Anko going from dramatically sad to angry psycho bitch in 2.5 seconds.

"Kit, you better run," said Kyuubi seeing that look promising pain.

'Why? Can't I use my bloodline you so painfully gave me?' thought Naruto finding the pain lessening.

"Not yet. You need about 10 minutes before it can be triggered and from the looks of things...this lady is not going to give you those 10 minutes," said Kyuubi now wishing he had waited until Naruto had gone to the safety of his home before doing this.

'Oh. Crap!' thought Naruto before hightailing it out of there with Anko hot on his heels with kunai out trying to spill some of his blood for what she considered to be the ultimate sin in her eyes.

"Get back here gaki! I'm going to kick your ass so badly your future children will look deformed and that is if I let you have children when I'm done with you!" said Anko, as she was pissed off, and had it not been for her crazy state of mind she would actually be impressed the boy had done so well to dodge her kunai.

'Damn. I need to get somewhere out of the public eye so I can use my bloodline on her when I'm able to awaken it,' thought Naruto, as he made his way to an empty training ground, dodging Anko's projectiles, and trying to make it to the forest.

He would have do had Anko's last one caught the sleeve on his right shoulder that stuck him to the tree with another doing the same when trying to remove it. That was followed by several more well thrown kunai hitting sleeves of his shirt at the elbows.

"Got you gaki. Damn that was one Hell of a chase. Been awhile since someone led me on one of these. Still, don't think because I'm impressed that I'm going to show you mercy when I humiliate you, and get my revenge for the loss of my precious dango!" said Anko grinning joyfully at getting her revenge.

'Kyuubi, what's the ETA to the bloodline kicking in?' thought Naruto seeing Anko now approaching him.

"Less then a minute. Stall her," said Kyuubi counting down the remaining time.

"Wait! Stop! I didn't mean to bump into you on purpose. It was an accident. A sudden pain hit my eyes and I couldn't see clearly," said Naruto seeing Anko look at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Really? You are going to expect me to believe that?" said Anko with her hands on her hips.

"What? You've never heard of bumping into someone being an accident? What possible reason could I have for doing it on purpose? None!" said Naruto seeing Anko think about it for a second.

"I suppose you have a valid point. Bumping into me is the last thing people do when I'm around and with dango in my hands," said Anko with Naruto letting out a sigh of relief at his words reaching her.

'That's good,' thought Naruto before Anko's face became devious again.

"But that won't get you off the hook with me kid," said Anko seeing Naruto's disbelief in her words.

"What? Even though me spilling the dango was accidental?" said Naruto not believing this woman was going to hurt him for something he didn't mean to do.

"If it makes you feel any better, after I beat the stuffing out of you, I will knock you out before I strip you naked, and hang you by your hands in the village square for all to see," said Anko like it was simple before reaching for him.

'ETA on the bloodline fox,' thought Naruto knowing it was now or never with this thing.

"Five seconds. When it happens, channel chakra to your eyes, and when you feel the change say 'Submission Eye' while making contact with hers," said Kyuubi counting down the last five seconds going by slowly.

"Any last words before you have to change your name, appearance, and overall identity in the Leaf little man," said Anko sadistically before putting her hand on his crotch and feeling how big it was while trying to intimidate her prey to wet himself in fear of losing the thing between his legs.

"Done! Do it now," said Kyuubi knowing the time to use the eyes.

"Yes I do. 'Submission Eye!'" said Naruto, as he did what Kyuubi told him to do, and felt his eyes change while staring directly at Anko.

Anko for her part was too shocked to see the eyes Naruto had change from blue to purple with a sparkling light dancing around the pupil and couldn't look away from them. She felt the rational mind being quieted, as Anko fell to her knees, and was at Naruto's mercy.

'What is going on? Why does it feel like I've just got string attached to my body and I've turned into this kid's puppet?' thought Anko, as she saw Naruto looking back at her with cautious eyes, and found herself unable to look away from his eyes.

"Can't believe it worked. Thank you fox! Now onto business. What it your name, rank, and current status of being a Shinobi?" said Naruto wanting to have a name to his psycho bitch of an attacker.

"Mitarashi Anko. Leaf Shinobi ranked Special Jounin. Current status is working for the I&T while being second in leading it next to Ibiki," said Anko while mentally wondering what was coming over her to tell him so much info right off the bat.

"So I outran a Special Jounin for nearly 10 minutes. Not bad. Tell me Anko-chan, were you really going to do all you said you were to my body, and even after learning it was an accident," said Naruto narrowing his eyes at her and unknowingly increasing the power behind his eyes.

"Not all of it. I was going to hurt you a little before knocking you unconscious, but then I was going to return you home, and steal a pair of your underwear to hang in the village square," said Anko seeing Naruto getting angrier.

"I see. Well Anko-chan, I'll have you know what happened was an accident, and I did feel badly about bumping into you earlier. I was hoping that once it was explained to you that it was in fact an accident, you would forgive me, and we let ourselves go our very much separate ways. Perhaps you should have now that you're within my power," said Naruto feeling angrier and somewhat different right now towards this woman while hearing the Kyuubi's words from past lessons about women running through his head.

'Oops! I forgot to mention to the kit about the side effect of using the eyes would bring about a perverted nature aimed towards the opposite sex. Oh well, he'll learn it soon enough,' thought Kyuubi, as he could feel the various emotions running through his vessel's mind right now, and the fox had to admit the woman in front of the boy had dressed rather erotically.

"Listen to my voice Anko-chan, as my words are now law to you, and will be obeyed as if I was the Hokage of the Leaf. My name is Uzumaki Naruto. Do you understand?" said Naruto firmly seeing the woman's glazed eyes get even glazier at his words.

"Yes Naruto-sama," said Anko nodding while the rational part of her mind was trying to break free with little success.

"Good. Now as I was saying, my name is Uzumaki Naruto, and from this day forward you are my slave. My bitch. You will address me as Naruto-sama, Naruto-kun, or Master when we are alone. Anything I ask you to do will be done without question with any kind of questioning brining about punishment, unless the command I give warrants one to further help please me, and nothing less then your best efforts to please me will suffice. If I need to alter your mindset regarding our private life, I will use my bloodline to do so, and you will accept it," said Naruto in a commanding tone with Anko nodding dumbly again.

"Yes Naruto-sama," said Anko simply.

"Good. Now for a more deeply imprinted command. Anko-chan, when I deactivate my bloodline, you will free me from this tree, and apologize for being a total bitch to me before kissing my feet. You will then pick me up and take me back to my place for some much needed food and rest with you sleeping in my bed for the night...naked. You won't complain, you won't protest, you won't report anything we do that goes on within my apartment to the Hokage. Got it?" said Naruto seeing Anko nod a little faster at the hypnotic command.

"Yes Naruto-sama," said Anko waiting with her hand on her lap like a student awaiting the commands of her teacher.

"Begin," said Naruto before deactivating his bloodline and seeing Anko shake her head in confusion.

"Ow my head. What the fuck just happened? I remember losing my dango, then chasing some blonde gaki, and now I...I...," said Anko, as she shook her head from the headache she felt, and then looked at Naruto's pinned form.

"Now you have me pinned here on an accident Anko-chan. A simple misunderstanding," said Naruto putting on the sad innocent look that would further influence Anko's hypnotic induced commands.

"Oh Kami! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" said Anko, as she felt this went against her nature, but yet couldn't stop herself from apologizing anyway, and freed Naruto from his pinned down position.

"Its all right Anko-chan. I'd be the same way if it was ramen. Can you take me home? I am tired from all the running around we did earlier," said Naruto while inwardly smirking and Kyuubi rolling around in his cage laughing his tails off.

The only thing that could make the fox's day any better would be if Uchiha Madara got incurable rectal cancer!

(Akatsuki HQ)

Madara felt his ass clench for a second and shivered.

"Something wrong?" said Pein seeing Madara shake his head no.

"No. No. I just had this sudden feeling of dread. Excuse me while I see a doctor about a...personal matter," said Madara before leaving to have his ass examined.

(Back in Konoha-Naruto's Apartment)

"Got to hand it to you kit. First time using your brand spanking new bloodline and already you got yourself a nice bitch to bang," said Kyuubi while Naruto ate the prepared meal of steak, mash potatoes, and glass of milk prepared for him by Anko currently naked with the small exception of the tiny apron that barely hid her sacred treasure.

'Yeah. And she can cook a good meal. I think I'll keep her around,' thought Naruto, as he turned to see Anko looking a bit nervous, and still possessing side of guilt for all of the chasing him around Konoha.

"Is everything to your liking Naruto-sama," said Anko, as her hypnotic programming had kicked in the moment she had carried him into the apartment, and set him down on his bed.

Hell, Anko didn't even realize she had called him Naruto-sama outside of the hypnotic state his eyes put her in, and immediately obeyed his commands on the preset she was doing all of this to make it up to him. So what if she was practically naked in a kid's home several years her junior, cooking him dinner, and not caring she was going to sleep in the same bed naked with the blonde.

She was just being friendly. Helpful even. There was nothing really bad about the boy's commands to do these thing for him. Right? Right!

"Yes it was Anko-chan. Everything was perfect. That's the best meal I've had in a looong time," said Naruto finishing up his meal before walking over to his couch unbuckled his pants, and letting it fall to his ankles while sitting on the piece of furniture with a sigh of happiness showing on his face.

Anko soon came into the living area with a blush on her face, as she sat down next to him, eyeing his bulge in his boxers, and had to admit to herself the boy was endowed down there. She figured it was because of the fox sealed inside of him on account of the way a female Shinobi would have huge breasts indicating the amount of chakra her body possessed.

Like Senju Tsunade.

Word was, Tsunade had been flat as a bored when roughly around Naruto's age, but after a lot of training to build up her chakra reserves she had breasts that were considered the biggest in all of the Elemental Countries. Sag free too since having them! Not bad when considering the woman's age at this point where they should be showing tall tale signs of wrinkling, dropping, and all that old hag stuff like Koharu's aged body was doing now.

"I'm sorry about chasing you earlier Naruto-sama," said Anko bowing like a submissive servant would her Master.

"I know you are Anko-chan. The meal you cooked for me proved that much. Though I need a little more convincing and I know how you can prove yourself again," said Naruto calmly, but the devious smirk on his face told otherwise, and Anko couldn't help the shiver running up her spine.

"H-How is that Naruto-sama?" said Anko feeling nervous about asking him a question for reasons she didn't know.

"Simple. First, get one of your pink 'toy' you keep in your stashed in your trench coat, and then come back here with it. Now!" said Naruto clapping his hands twice like a Sultan would command his servant with Anko jumping off the couch quickly to get the item he wished for.

"Here it is Naruto-sama. Its clean I promise," said Anko moments later with the vibrator toy she kept for those days when the "itch" needed to be "scratch" using her own means.

"I'm sure it is. Now put it in that nice little gleaming with juice pussy of yours and don't hold back the moaning since I basically live in this apartment complex all alone because I'm the Kyuubi's jailor. Cry out like the slut I know you are," said Naruto seeing Anko doing as he commanded and putting the vibrator in her pussy while letting out moans of pleasure like she had when doing it to herself.

"Done Naruto-sama," said Anko calmly despite the fact she had the vibrator within her body placed there at the boy's command.

"Hand me the remote to it," said Naruto seeing Anko stiffen slightly, but obeyed when he glared at her, and the imprinted command to obey the blonde at all times reinforced itself.

"Yes Naruto-sama. Sorry for the pause Naruto-sama, its just that I don't let anyone else to this, but me-EEEE!" said Anko, as she felt incredible pleasure shoot through her when Naruto cranked up the level near high right away, and she fell to her knees in front of the blonde.

"I know Anko-chan, but still you hesitated, and I have to punish you for that hesitation since you're supposed to trust me, remember?" said Naruto giving her that commanding look her hypnotic state saw and according to Kyuubi in his head would help make her submissive to his commands.

"I understand Naruto-sama," said Anko, as she moan further when he increased the level on the switch, and beckoned her face closer between his legs.

"No you don't Anko-chan. This is not your punishment. In fact, tomorrow will be when I punish you, and it will be all day just to make sure you understand," said Naruto, as he grabbed the back of Anko's head, and moved it around his boxers.

Anko blushed, as her face could feel his cock behind the boxers Naruto wore, and was right when she told herself he was well endowed. When he stopped, Naruto removed her face from his shorts, and then took her hand with his before placing them around where his erection.

"You want me to pleasure you Naruto-sama?" said Anko knowing better then to ask the question, but it was the only way to get the command, even if he hinted at it, and made her feel his need behind the fabric.

"Why thank you Anko-chan. Please do," said Naruto, as he saw Anko use the hole in his boxers to grab his erection, and bring it out for her to see in all its glory.

"Its very big for your age Naruto-sama," said Anko, as she couldn't help, but feel excited about doing this, and wondered why that was the case?

In the back of her mind, Anko told herself this was wrong, but any form of voicing it fell on mentally deaf ears, and she continued to do as commanded by Naruto to pleasure him.

"All the more cum to shoot out of you my sex slave," said Naruto, as he moaned in pure pleasure at Anko's tongue licking his shaft all over, and felt her hand massaging his balls.

Anko for her part didn't care what he called her, as she was doing what he commanded, and had experience from doing missions requiring the use of sex to get close to an enemy in order to assassinate them. Of course such deep cover missions were very rare and the Shinobi chosen were a handful while being selected for their status of being single. Even then, the Hokage had to inquire to if the Shinobi going on such a mission was going to get married, or in a relationship with the opposite sex.

So when Anko began to give Naruto the best blowjob he could ever ask for, the Special Jounin had no problem using the experience from the class that taught this at the time in the Academy, and on missions to get him off. Her slurping, sucking, and moaning mixed with his own echoed throughout the room with Naruto loving every second of her work.

"Oh yeah kit. She's a real keeper. Though if I remember correctly about your village laws, you're going to have to keep this a secret from the Hokage until you graduate, and your current grades won't make that happen. You'll have to try for next year and you need a teacher, who won't screw you over, and do the job right to make that even happen," said Kyuubi knowing that Naruto was only half listening.

Though considering what the boy was feeling right now, half listening was better then not listening, and the fox could always tell him this later.

Yeah. Definitely later.

"Anko-chan, I'm going to cum. Drink it all down or else," said Naruto before holding her head in place and came into Anko's mouth with the woman drinking it all down though with some difficulty due to never receiving so much from anyone prior to now.

I mean what kid Naruto's age can release so much sperm? Oh yeah, someone like Naruto could, and just did all down Anko's mouth into her throat.

Obeying him, Anko did before he released the back of her skull, and felt some left over cum shoot out of his cock onto her face before she quickly licked it up in the belief that the last shot he hit her face with counted. Seeing Naruto smile in approval, her guess was correct before she quickly cleaned him off, and put his cock back in his boxers before removing his pants from his ankles.

"Shall I carry you to bed now Naruto-sama? You have a busy day ahead of you and a growing boy needs his rests," said Anko seeing Naruto shake his head no.

"Not yet. Sit next to me and relax," said Naruto, as he saw her obey, and rest her head on his shoulders while one of his hands played with one of her breasts.

"Its unfair they mistreat you Naruto-sama. They did the same to me when I was younger and still do now on occasion," said Anko moaning slightly under his touch while holding him and was surprised to feel a potent amount of muscle on his body.

She actually expected him to be malnourished given his current hated filled status within Konoha.

"I know Anko-chan, which is why I have a proposition for you, and would benefit us in keeping things we do here a continued secret," said Naruto while pinching her nipple and giving it a hard quick twist that made Anko's breathing hitch suddenly.

"And what is that Naruto-sama?" said Anko, as she felt the vibrator go up another level, and moaned more while feeling an orgasm approaching.

"Simple. I'm in need of a teacher, who will help me with my Shinobi training, and push myself to the front of the class Academically. You help me with this and I will use my abilities in the distant future to help get your revenge on the one who hurt you years ago," said Naruto, as he saw the Curse Seal on her shoulder, and heard Kyuubi tell him that fowl thing would need to be purged from her body.

"His name is Orochimaru. He's one of the Sannin," said Anko feeling Naruto's anger grow and being aimed at her bastard pedophile of a former teacher.

(Rice Country)

Orochimaru sneezed thinking someone was talking about him before Kabuto came in with the daily report.

"Anything else Orochimaru-sama?" said Kabuto.

"Yes. Time to play the submissive slave and ruthless Master again with my Kusanagi," said Orochimaru grinning at the now pale faced Kabuto.

How else was Kabuto expected to keep his fast healing rate up?

By training like Shinobi should? Not on Orochimaru's watch.

(Back in Konoha)

"So that means you're going to help me train, right Anko-chan?" said Naruto seeing Anko nod while sweating slightly at the pleasurable sensation running through her body.

"Y-Yes Naruto-sama!" said Anko gasping when he used both hands to attack her breasts and came hard from a double nipple twist.

"Good girl. Now, I'm going to get ready for bed, and while I'm doing that you can clean this up before meeting me in bed. I want to use those lovely breasts of yours as pillows," said Naruto kissing her cheek before getting off the chair and turning off the vibrator.

"Do I keep my toy in tonight too?" said Anko seeing Naruto pause for a second.

"Nah! Clean the toy too and put it away," said Naruto seeing Anko nod before heading to the bathroom while the woman herself slumped back exhausted.

'Please Kami don't let him be grabby when sleeping,' thought Anko before setting out to do her assigned task.

(High Above in Heaven)

"No dice Anko-chan. Don't worry though since he'll be a gentle grabber," said Kami, as she watched the boy, and wished she could help him further.

But nooooo, she had to follow her own damn laws, and her sister Yami was having that time of the century so there was no point getting in an argument that could bring about the Apocalypse.

Still, it didn't mean she could help him along in some other way, and decided to make those around Naruto suffer like they tried to do to him. Looking down at the Leaf, Kami smiled deviously at a sleeping Hatake Kakashi, who had neglected his duties to Naruto, and with a wave of her hand turned the book he had been reading earlier into one where the men didn't sleep with hot women.

They got violated by horny gay men.

Snickering at her handy work in changing all of the man's books into such nasty things, Kami looked at one Hyuuga Hinata, and seeing the naughty dreams the girl was having about the young blonde Uzumaki. Kami was surprised at first, but then again the girl had matured rather quickly for her age, which was the nature of the Hyuuga Clan she was in, and raised to be more mature in order to get stronger.

Tweaking the dream slightly, Kami so Hinata's face turning a shade darker then usual, and smiled knowing the girl was going to need new sheets tomorrow. Perhaps it was cruel, but if it kept the girl on the course to being with Naruto no matter what, then all the more naughty dreams to Hinata, and nothing less until the time was right for the two to get together.

After that, Kami focused on a few more people in Konoha, smiling mischievously at the village, and decided to exercise her one cosmic right to do things in a pranking fashion. It had been a while since she had and Kami wasn't about to stop until she got it all out of her system.

And if Yami or the Shinigami complained? Well then she'd just have to fuck them up too like she did the last 1,000 years ago. Of course the last time that happened she accidently brought around instability and the creation of the ten-tailed beast so it would have to be a quick subtle ass kicking.

Subtle meaning one or two countries sinking into the ocean and maybe...at least one being consumed by the lava from a nearby volcano.

Maybe.

(A/N: YAY! New fic and new ball game since this will have lots of humor with a mix of humor based bashing on certain people. Hope you enjoyed. Until next time...PEACE!)