Another Sort of Trouble

Enter name

L u k e

Enter horse's name

L a y t o n

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Link rose to the sound of heavy breathing outside of his door. How he could hear it from so far away, he would never know. Was Midna playing some sort of foolish prank on him, hiding in the shadows? No, she would be giggling at him if that were the case.

Link decided at length to investigate. He stood up, ignoring the fact that his tree house was devoid of any sort of bed and most furniture. Sleepily, he crammed his green windsock over his head and flipped backwards off the top floor. He landed with a heavy ouch and turned to face his front door. Three times he rolled towards the door and three times he slammed painfully into it before managing to stop completely and then turn it open.

"Luke!"

Link nearly walked into the vertically challenged little boy. He looked down to see a blonde head buried in his tunic. "…"

"Luke! I was waiting to see you!"

"…" It was Colin. Colin the stalker. Link frowned down at him.

"Luke! I want to be just like you when I grow up. Just. Like. You," Colin said lovingly. Link continued to frown. Colin ignored this and continued, "Luke! I made something for you. Just for you. I made it. With my own sweat, blood and tears. And maybe some other things, too." He giggled.

"…" Was this child insane? Why would he ever accept something from such a creepy kid?

"I made it all by myself!" Colin exclaimed excitedly, quivering in excitement. "Come to my house and take a look!" He grabbed Link's hand and pulled him eagerly to the edge of the platform.

"Hah," thought Link. "The little bugger can't pull me down the ladder."

Link had thought wrong. Colin, after a moment of consideration, began down the ladder.

"That's the end of that," Link thought. But it wasn't.

Colin reached a tiny child hand up and grabbed Link around the ankle. "C'mon, Luke! I want to show it to you!"

With strength rivalling that of a Goron, Link was dragged from the platform and fell to the ground below.

"C'mon, Luke!" Colin grabbed him by the belt.

"My name is Link," Link thought dully. "Also, stop touching me with your filthy child hands. Stop that. Bad touch! Bad touch!"

Colin began to pull Link from his house towards the village. "I know it's late, but I wanted you to see! I wanted you to know. I wanted you to know my love for you. All of it."

"…" Link stared in horror. What sort of child had his parents raised? Why? Why would anyone say that?

"C'mon, Luke! I wanna be just like you when I grow up! Just like you," Colin nattered in a way that sounded like "I want to wear your skin".

Link made a half-hearted sound in the back of his throat, thinking, "Go away. Leave me alone. I have other problems. Evil related problems. Midna related problems. I don't need psychotic child stalker problems, too."

Colin ignored Link's severe apathy. Coming to a chest by his house, he squeaked, "Look, Luke! I made it just for you."

With rising terror, Link kicked it open.

Doo doo dooo do, doo doo dooo do, doo dooo doooo doooooooo.

Link got

A poem!

Is it…is it written in blood? What the fuck? Who would write a poem in blood? This kid is messed up, you'd better fucking run, man. Oh god…oh god… Is that…? Oh god, run, just get on your fucking horse and ride.

Link stared down at the stained parchment paper in his hands. How would this ever be useful? Ever?

"…" Link motioned to the path.

"Oh, I get it! You have to go on a heroic adventure now, right, Luke? I'm jealous, you get to ride Layton all night long! Someday, I'm going to be just like you, Luke! Don't forget to take my poem with you! I made it just for you, remember?"

Link plastered a fake smile on his face and nodded. But he couldn't keep the fear out of his eyes. The eyes never lie.

"See you later, Luke!" Colin exclaimed, bouncing up and down and waving as Link mounted Epona. "See you later! I will see you later! Forever! Remember, Luke! I know where you live! I can find you, Luke! I will find you!"

Link, the horror-based grin still on his face, nodded and waved back, then clicked, coaxing Epona into a gallop. No horse could ride fast or far enough to take him away from the pint-sized demon of a child.

Ganondorf may have been a fearsome opponent, but he'd never be able to even hold a candle to the sheer terror that was Colin.