Chapter 19

The messages again:

Gunter's are written in italic letters, Gwendal's are bold.

Conrad had sensed that something was wrong the moment he stepped into his big brother's office. With a short look around, he immediately knew what it was. It felt empty.

„Where is Gunter?" he asked Gwendal worriedly after greeting him.

„I don't know," the dark-haired mazoku answered, shrugging his shoulders while the wrinkle between his eyebrows sunk unusually deep. He had closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose with his right thumb. He looked tired and tensed.

„You don't know?" Conrad's eyes snapped open in surprise. „What happened? He couldn't have left without telling you where he's going!"

„Well, he actually did, one week after you started your honeymoon."

„Then it's been almost four weeks since he went away? And you have no clue where he is? That doesn't seem like Gunter at all-"

„Wait, wait, wait. I'll explain, but give me the time to do so. Yes, it's been four weeks. The only thing I know is that he's at some kind of village somewhere. He had stayed there to help the villagers a bit and he seems to be fine. He sends a carrier pigeon every day."

Gwendal opened the first drawer of his desk, revealing a pile of papers of various sizes. They all had Gunter's typical handwriting on it.

„I can't tell you what's exactly the point, because that is none of your business. Excuse me for that, but I just can't," with that, he closed the drawer again before the captain could take a look at the messages.

„When will he return, then?"

„When he's ready. That also depends on me - well, kind of - but like I said, that's between him and me."

„Have you two had a fight?"

„Not really. Please, Conrad, I said I wouldn't tell you. It's okay."

Conrad sighed. No, it's not. He wondered what was up with the counselor and what exactly had happened between him and his brother. But he thought he'd get to know that soon. He just had to ask one certain spy...

He shook his head inwardly. No, he couldn't. Gwendal had his reasons for not telling him and if he wanted it to be that way, then it would be for the better. Though he used to keep things to handle himself without thinking about other opportunities and the fact that somebody might be able to help him.

The soldier realized he had stared into the floor all the time and quickly looked back at the general. „Anything else happened?"

„No, not really. Things are fine, and I even managed to take over Gunter's work, as much as I could. Though there are a few things I'd like you to manage, but that's for later... How was your honeymoon?"

Conrad couldn't help but smile all over his face. „It was amazing. We both enjoyed it very much, and... I don't find the right words." He scratched the back of his head. „I'm just happy with the way things are and Yuri is as well. The trip went perfect and without any incidents."

Gwendal nodded, the wrinkle on his forehead a little softer. „I'm happy to hear that."

„You know, big brother, sometimes you should think about a relationship as well."

The dark-haired man raised an eyebrow and eyed him suspiciously.

Conrad sighed, smiling. „It's so refreshing and comfortable to have someone you can spend your life with. I haven't noticed that for years, until Yuri came. Maybe something like that would do you good."

Gwendal just turned his head to look outside the window. And the brunette had the strange feeling that he somehow had hit his weak spot dead on. Maybe it was something else and maybe his assumtion was also right, though he couldn't put it into words.

After Conrad was gone, Gwendal couldn't help but silently curse his little brother's sensibility. How could he know about... Well, maybe he didn't know exactly what he was talking about, but seeing that glimpse of satisfaction as he had looked into Conrad's eyes again was frustrating. Was he so easy to figure out?

He opened the window to let the carrier pigeon back in. It had waited all the time outside the window, because he still hadn't found an answer for Gunter.

There was so much he wanted to tell his friend, and yet, when he took his pen and paper, he wouldn't find any adequate words.

The general covered his eyes with his left hand, trying to sort his thoughts and feelings. He imagined Gunter, sitting in a small room in the dim candle light, writing down the love confession he had sent him yesterday. He surely had smiled at writing those words. Gunter's smile, that particular one, was rarely to be seen, a smile that he only had when he was deeply happy or thinking about anything that made him so happy.

Not the usual smile he wore every day. It was kind of like the same with Conrad, he also had that deeply-happy-smile which wasn't seen very often. But mostly, he noticed it when Yuri was around.

But Gwendal was sure that the white-haired man's smile had faded into a bitter expression, as he attached the message to the pidgeon's neck. And involuntary, a sharp pain hit his heart.

He realized, that it was not pity he felt.

Yes, and not at all. You know that I'm not good expressing myself with words concerning those matters. But I'll try to explain to you as best as I can. Though, I can't do that like this, in a letter. If I begged you to come home, would you? I have to talk to you. Badly.

But I don't even know how I should look into your eyes anymore. I'm still embarrassed by what I've said and done, and it will hurt even more when I see you again.

What if I promise you won't regret coming back? We'll find a way.

If you really can't tell me what you want to say in this messages and you really want me to come back, then I will. The only thing I beg you to is that don't meet me in the castle as always. I won't come home straight there. I don't want to meet you again within all the other people around because I'm scared... of my own reaction... if you know what I mean.

I know. I'll meet you at old oak on the hilltop. You know which one, just tell me when you'll arrive and I'll be there.

If I'm leaving tomorrow in the morning, I will be there in about two days, late afternoon.

Okay. I hoped you left today?

I did, I'm on my way.

Arriving today?

I suppose early afternoon.

Gwendal leaned back at the trunk of the old tree, which was warmed up by the midday sun. It had been a hot early summer day, and his uniform felt way too warm. Luckily, the shadow of the big tree made it endurable.

He didn't know how long he had sat there. He found himself restless and incredibly nervous since around lunchtime and he hadn't been able to eat a single bite. He wasn't hungry at all, which was strange enough.

He hadn't told anyone that Gunter was coming back today, though he had been completely flustered and he had wanted to just talk to someone. It had laid heavy on his mind all the time. He hadn't slept that night, pondering over everything. Was it right to beg Gunter to come home? Was he even ready himself?

Gwendal hadn't been able to stay in the castle any longer, so he took the short walk to the tree and sat down. He had closed his eyes and enjoyed the warm sunshine. Nonetheless, his stomach felt twisted around and he had that strange vibrating feeling that had hunted him for the whole past weeks.

It was especially bad when the pigeon sat in his window in the morning. And when he read Gunter's love confession over and over. Again.

If he didn't admit to himself what he felt, then how should he tell Gunter? He sighed.

As he opened his eyes, he found the sun halfway down on its way to the horizon, meaning that it had to be early afternoon by now.

Then, Gwendal heard the clip-clopping of a horse and his heart jumped to a way faster pace.

As he looked down the hill, he saw a tall, white horse, which he recognized immediately as Gunter's. Not that the fact that it carried the lavender-haired man explained itself.

He felt his heart skip a beat because of the huge happiness at seeing the adjutant again. So much indeed, that his stomach felt like twisting around a little more, almost making him feel sick. The horse made its way slowly up the hill, which was covered by high-grown grass.

Gwendal still sat at the roots of the tree, his heart pounding painfully hard and loud in his chest. He hadn't been that nervous for a long time.

Gunter approached him, and stopped his horse a few feet away, dismounting it.

As he walked graciously towards the tree, Gwendal got to his feet to meet him halfway. Their eyes locked, and without any words, the general pulled the white-haired man into his arms.

His voice broke as he whispered into Gunter's ear. „I'm sorry, my friend. You know I'm not good with expressing myself with the right words, so all I've got so say is... I love you."

The adjutant laughed softly, his face buried at the other one's neck.

„You know, if you had said anything else than this, I would never have talked to you again."

His lips kissed those sensitive parts of his neck, up to his earlobe to nibble at it, before he pulled away to look into Gwendal's eyes again.

The latter cupped Gunter's face in both hands and pulled him towards himself.

„I promised, you won't regret it," he said with his deep, husky voice before sealing Gunter's lips with a passionate kiss.

I hope you had as much fun reading this as much as I had writing this :) This chapter almost wrote itself. It's really amazing, usually I need several days for one chapter... but this was written within two hours...

I'm feeling like Gwendal now, like walking on air. It's really hard to get a confession out of that stoic demon btw.

I thought I had to update this now, though - very unusual for me - I don't have the next chapter written out. I'm not really in the mood now, to be honest, but when I find the time, I will continue this. At least I hope so.

The point is, I'm pretty busy with my new story, which isn't online yet, but you should watch out for it. Different pairing, of course ;)