Disclaimer: I don't own HP cos if i did this would be an completly AU when it is only slightly.

Hey i wrote something similar to this yesterday but i wasn't satisfied so i wrote this instead but it's in poem form. I only left the other one up cos some people liked it but i think personally i enjoyed this one more so hopefully you will to i wrote it during maths and biology so i hope its alright. my friends who read it thought it was good. thanks by the way to eveyone who reviews my fics it's nice to know someone enjoys them and it's such a boost for my self confidence. also thanks to Ash and Coxy who read this before i posted, I love you guys. anyway on to the fic and don't forget to review 3

Do You Know What It's Like?

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal. ~From a headstone in Ireland

Do you know what it's like to have your heart stop beating? But to know you will continue to live anyway.

Do you know what it's like to be able to breathe? But know every breath is as futile as the next because you can no longer breathe him in.

Do you know what it's like to cry so much that you feel like you shouldn't cry anymore but you cannot stop as you know that he is not there to see you cry?

Do you know what it's like to follow his smell but to know what you're smelling is never truly him?

Do you know what it's like to feel so guilty because of the blood the blood that runs through your veins? If you could you would give him your blood even though it's diseased, vile and filthy.

Do you know what it's like to eat but to know nothing could or will ever taste as good as he did?

Do you know what it's like to be able to hold him in your arms every night but for that feeling to be replaced by the very essence of absence?

Do you know what it's like never to be able to grieve properly because you know others need it more?

Do you know what it's like to suffer with the memories of him encased in your mind but for none of it to matter as he is not there to watch you suffer?

Do you know what it's like to barely be able to get out of bed in the morning because you know when you wake he won't be beside you, there'll only be an empty, cold space?

Do you know what it's like to make a pot of tea and pour it for two when you know in your heart that only one will ever be touched?

Do you know what it's like to hear his voice echo in your mind thinking you're insane because the others don't hear it?

Do you know what it's like to speak to an empty room knowing you'll wait there all day for a reply you know will never come?

Do you know what it's like to be present at his funeral but to never accept his death because in your mind he's sitting right beside you?

Do you know what it's like for everyone to tip-toe around you because they know you're hurting? They have no fucking clue.

Do you know what it's like for the doctors to tell you you're insane just because you want to keep hold of the lost memories you have of him, just because you see him, hear him and feel him doesn't mean you're insane? Does it?

Do you know what it's like to have to take a prescription that you know will result in ripping the only memories you have of him from your conscience?

Do you know what it's like to live knowing your nothing but dead inside without him?

Well I do.

Thanks for reading it's pretty sad right please review and let me know what you thought.

Cheers Messer Moony