I got this idea after the last episode. I'm not giving up on my other fic though.

'What's with her?'

He's watching Robin at the bar, all alone, drunk and silent. She'd barely spoken to him all day.

'Her job,' Ted replies. 'The network is making some cuts and Robin thinks they're going to fire her to keep Becky.'

'Oh.'

He shrugs. So she went to Ted instead of him, it doesn't mean anything. They're roommates. Besides, after what he did to her two weeks ago, he can't blame her for not wanting to confide in him.

'What do they see in Becky anyway?' he wants to know. 'Robin is way hotter. And I have watched that Becky girl. Nothing she says makes sense to me.'

'I guess they want someone perky. Wait, since when do you watch the show?'

'I was bored, all right?'

Robin doesn't deserve this, not after what she's been through. She's had a rough year and while he wasn't there for her as much as he should have been, he's going to fix this for her. Things swivel around and click in his head, and he grins, cocking his head.

Ted narrows his eyes. 'What are you up to?'

'What do you mean, Theodore?'

'I know that look, Barney.'

'I don't know what you're talking about. Now, excuse me, I have some work to do.' He finishes up and leaves the cash on the table.

And he disappears from their grid for a whole week.

Step 1

After a few hours of research, Barney has eliminated a few options on his list. Who knew human trafficking was illegal?

To get rid of Becky he's going to need to play his strengths. He'll sleep with her, lure her away with a grossly exaggerated but real job offer, and convince Robin's producers to promote her. Nice and simple, really.

Step 2

He accidentally bumps into Becky at a silly ice cream parlor, introducing himself as—

'James Logan, TV agent. And you are?'

Oh, she falls for it all right. It's so easy. They end up at his place, where, after sex, he inadvertently tells her about this spot on a successful news network in Chicago he's looking to fill.

'Do you happen to know anyone who might be interested?' he asks her.

Her eyes widen. 'Pick me! I've never been to Chicago.'

'Well, I don't know. . .It's a big job, Becky.' He sighs heavily. 'Plus, you're still tied to that show you're doing.'

'I can quit my job—'

'Then it's settled!'

Later on, she pokes through his DVD collection and pulls a Robin Sparkles video out, curiously. Just before she puts it in, he snatches it away protectively, stashing it somewhere safe.

Step 3

Becky quits her job the next day and meets him at their airport, giddy. After boarding the plane, he excuses himself to go to the comfort room and sneaks out the aircraft. And a horrible feeling forms in his stomach for having tricked Becky into accepting a job as a Lottery Girl.

Why did it use to be so guilt-free? Before he fell i—Well, before Robin came alone, that is.

Step 4

First, he calls some people in Chicago and arranges a new job for Becky, better and closer to the one he'd lied about.

Next, he manipulates some company finances and documents to buy shares out of Robin's network, enough, at least, to have a say in what happens. He'll handle the details later. Not only will her salary be raised, but he manages to convince them to tweak her show a little bit.

For example, now it's called Mornings with Robin. And he wants them to give her more freedom with the news, run ads that people will actually see and give Robin her own secretary. They have no choice but to give in.

Step 5

He walks back into the bar with his familiar swagger. This time she's sitting at the booth with the rest of the gang, glowing, in the middle of telling a wonderful story.

'What up?'

'Dude, where have you been?' Marshall asks. 'Bilson said you'd taken a whole week off.'

Lily frowns. 'You look like you woke up at a dumpster this morning, naked, drugged and mugged. We were really worried.'

'That's so sweet.'

Barney turns to the person next to him. He can't look her in the eye. If she finds out, if anyone finds out what he's done, she'd feel indebted to him. And that's the very last thing he wants. In his book, it's the other way around.

'So, how was your week, Scherbatsky?'

'Awesome, Barney. No, scratch that—it's been perfect. Can you believe Becky actually quit yesterday? Now they're giving me her share of the salary.'

This is why he does it, he thinks, smiling as she smiles, following her excited chatter in content. Everything—the sleepless nights, the hostile negotiations, the dodging he'd have to do at work—is worth is.

She's worth it.

This may turn into a series of oneshots with the running theme.