Belongings
Relena : Regrets
A Gundam Wing Fan fiction by Louise Tjandrasjahan
Part 03
Relena narrowed her eyes as the fierce rays of the afternoon sun burning
her eyes, and donned her black baseball cap as she rummaged her white
plastic bag for a pair of sunglasses. Her lips twitched in satisfaction
when her hand finally found what she was looking for. However, her smile
turned into frown, when she finally took a good look at the sunglasses.
It was Quatre's sunglasses. Turning the object in her hand, she
mused inwardly, wondering how it ended up in her bag. She eyed the
glinting wire rim and the blue lenses disinterestedly. Hers and Quatre's
style sure differed. Personally she preferred her plastic red framed and
yellow tinted sunglasses, but anything would do for her as long as they
served their purpose. In this case, she needed the sunglasses to protect
her identity and shield her eyes from the scorching sun.
Shrugging carelessly, Relena she donned the sunglasses. She lifted
an eyebrow as she caught her reflection on a display window by her side,
biting her lower lip as she brushed her bangs aside and scrutinised her
own reflection. The wire-framed sunglasses actually suited her look
albeit a little bit old fashioned.
Hefting her bag high below her arm, she smiled at her reflection
one more time before skipping to another direction. However, her feet
were frozen to the ground the moment she spotted a distinct reflection
of a man. Relena gasped involuntarily; her hands flew to cover her mouth.
Heero Yui. He was in town? Shopping alone? Unbelievable.
She could never believe her ill luck.
Quickly she turned her back on the reflection on the display window
and lowered her sunglasses before double-checking the figure standing
across the road. Her hands were shaking from both panic and excitement.
The man was definitely Heero Yui, although he seemed to be much
more at ease than the Heero she had encountered in the headquarters
every day, with one hand leaning casually against the traffic light and
the other holding several plastic bags. Silver plastic sunglasses
perched on the bridge of his nose, and he was out of his usual Preventer
uniform.
It was common knowledge that Heero was her old time flame, but –
God forgives her – she was engaged to Quatre Raberba Winner! Still, she
couldn't resist ogling Heero Yui. He reminded her of the past as she saw
him raking his windblown dark mousy hair; his lean figure looked
irresistible in the high-necked black sleeveless shirt and khakis. It
wasn't exactly his old dress code, but the image he produced brought her
back to last time they had spent together in the abandoned hangar.
Relena could feel a smile forming slowly on her mouth as she craned
her neck to get a better view of Heero. Relena could only sense aura of
relaxation from him, a trait that rarely appeared. Gone was the stealth
he applied on his every movement. He almost looked like an ordinary man.
A beautiful man, Heero Yui was.
He was also the same man who had refused her a few months ago,
claiming he loved and hated her at the same time. The same man who had
kissed her passionately, and yet leaving her empty and dissatisfied
after. The same man who had been her sole obsession since she was
fifteen, young and full of dreams, but lonely.
And the bastard, he was also the first to break his heart.
Relena stiffened at her own thought. She knew she would never
dismiss the memory completely, but she just never expected it to affect
her so strongly. Usually she managed to maintain civil if not friendly
atmosphere during the time they had to work together. So, why now?
"Aw, let's go!" she groaned. She was just being sentimental. Sure
the strange emotion would fade in a minute.
Relena commanded herself to move, but her legs wouldn't follow her
order. She placed the sunglasses back before her eyes, but they couldn't
stop spying on Heero. At least the young Preventer member was totally
oblivious of Relena's existence.
Or may be he wasn't.
After all, acute senses had always been in his nature, the perfect
soldier.
Relena gasped, cursing her own stupidity. She should have run when
she had the chance. Heero eventually looked up, a frown between his
brows, his strong hand lifting the sunglasses so they rested on top of
his head. A shudder ran through Relena's spine the moment his cobalt
blue eyes bored into her own baby blue ones. Heero's cold and steely
glare was not a new experience for her, but it still pierced her heart.
Relena narrowed her eyes in silent scrutiny. The muscles of his
face were hardened as recognition flashed in his eyes, but the display
of emotions ended there. Relena thought she had no reason to fear Heero,
but, as seconds were ticking by, she finally realised she did fear him
for his unpredictability.
Shaking her head ruefully, Relena let out a dry chuckle and threw
one arm in defeat. Heero Yui was definitely a hopeless case. She knew
what she would do. She would just have to play it cool, crossed the road
in a stride (where she supposed to be heading, anyway), greeted Heero
bravely and went her merry way. Yes, she would just do that.
Yet, she wouldn't budge from her spot although the crossing light
turned green, and then turned back into red. And neither did Heero.
She could see his fists tightened around the handles of his
shopping bags as he continued staring into the blueness of Relena's
crystal clear orbs. Relena stepped aback, her heart pumped wildly as she
became self-consciousness. She, Relena Peacecraft, who had hypnotised
her audience whenever she spoke, was frozen by a mere glance of a man.
It took her several seconds to calm her heart. By the time she
managed ignoring Heero's penetrating gaze, she was all teary and
exhausted…too drained to flee from him. She was a fool for believing
herself to be immune to his frightening gaze. Heero's gaze stripped her
soul barriers, leaving her with nothing to cover her most intimate
emotions.
Blinking away her tears, Relena clutched her bag close to her heart
and scuttled away to escape the vision of Heero Yui. She would not cross
the road. It was too risky for her sanity. Heero was still looking at
her – she realised this as she felt the hair on her nape pricked. It was
strange, but she thought she sensed thousands of undefined emotions she
had never witnessed before in Heero. She stopped on her track in a
moment of impetuosity, curiosity finally winning over as she whirled her
head to face him once again.
She never understood him. She thought he wanted her to go away; she
really thought he did. But when she looked into his eyes, there would
always be this naked, undefined emotion – one that finally forced her to
stay. It was always like that. And when she stayed, he refused. When she
left, he pleaded…silently. She didn't know anymore what he wanted of her.
She needed him to tell her.
------------------------------------------------
Heero's heart skipped a beat the moment he saw the lovely vision
before his eyes, suppressing the urge to chuckle at Relena's attempt to
hide her identity with a pair of sunglasses and a black baseball cap. It
would never work for him; he recognised her too well. Those slender
limbs, slim waist, beautiful golden tresses and the cherry red lips…the
way her hips swayed…everything about her screamed Relena Peacecraft to
him. She wasn't totally uncreative though. At least she managed to
deceive most of the civilians around her.
Heero was unable to take his eyes from her even as he was adjusting
the balance of his shopping bags and leant on his left hip, searching
for the most comfortable stance to continue his watching. The barest tug
at the corners of his lips formed a ghostly little smile as he regarded
her with hooded eyes. The smile became ironic when he saw Relena shifted
from foot to foot in discomfort.
She was marrying one of his comrades in a few months. Should he
feel regret, perhaps sadness? Or should he be happy? He had no idea. In
fact, he didn't have the slightest clue about what he was feeling inside.
He had driven Relena away from him, and yet he couldn't bring himself to
congratulate the brilliance of his own action and continue as if nothing
had happened in the past few months. After all, he believed he had
removed the obstacle of in his life.
Relena became extremely polite to him, and never again regarded him
with the warmth she reserved only for her close friends and relatives.
She never bothered him anymore, not even for a friendly chitchat. She
avoided him like a plague, only talking to him when necessary, and with,
he should say, much professionalism.
He supposed to be happy, but a pang of 'something' drove him insane
instead. It was an uncomfortable twinge at first, but it grew bigger and
bigger and sometimes it would distract him from work. Even worse, he
started making mistakes in his missions, which caused his reputation as
a perfect soldier to suffer.
He thought he was over with the love thing. He thought by
eliminating their relationship, he could set his life back on the right
track. He told the woman he had loved her, but also hated her to get rid
of everything that he believed bringing nothing but commotions.
Her face haunted him even in his waking hours. He swore she had had
him poisoned, and the poison lingered, refusing to leave his mind. He
changed; he was not his normal self anymore. But what was normal? He
never dared asking anybody and kept the secret to himself.
He tried sleeping pills, and yet Relena's face would always float
into his dreams. In the dream he was always mesmerised and reduced into
a dysfunctional person, unable to resist her charms. He always woke up
with sweat drenching his body, shaking with silent longing and those
undefined emotions. Guilt? Love? Again, he had no clue.
Against all odds, he started stealing glances at the beautiful
diplomat the moment he was sure she wasn't looking his way, even at work.
No matter how many times he looked at her, she was always bold and
strong and beautiful, her blue eyes blazing and sparkling with vivacity
as she impressed the older diplomats around her while getting her job
done efficiently at the same time.
However, at the moment he was looking at a different Relena – the
Relena outside their working environment. No designer suit, no make-up,
no intricately braided hair. Just Relena and plain Relena – a beautiful
and young single woman in the sky blue spaghetti strapped top and
bootleg jeans, her hair high in a ponytail.
He surprised himself when a genuine smile spread on his face. Not
quite a smirk, but a gentle one. Relena looked just like an ordinary
woman, and for a moment he could forget who and where he was. At that
moment he was just an ordinary man admiring an ordinary girl on an
uneventful day. May be he could forgo all restrictions and spoke to her
in a more civilised manner for today. Besides, Relena would soon marry
Quatre. A simple greeting wouldn't hurt.
The light finally turned green again, and he took a deep breath,
strengthening his resolution as he crossed the street purposely. His
hands were cold and clammy as he shifted his loads from hand to hand,
his heart hammering against his ribcage. All this excitement was new to
him, and he was giddy because of it. He was aware of the implications of
allowing his emotions to rule over his head, but he was willing to take
the risk.
He quickened his pace as he sensed her speeding away from him, her
nervous aura penetrating his senses. He pushed the milling people out of
his way, sending glares potent with his usual steel determination that
caused people to part voluntarily. He only had one mission in his head:
to catch up with Relena, whom he realised was just as afraid as him to
face each other. Nevertheless, he couldn't let her go because he must,
at all cost, clear up everything with Relena and at least settled on a
mutual understanding.
Today, just today, perhaps he was able to figure out what he
actually desired.
Relena : Regrets
A Gundam Wing Fan fiction by Louise Tjandrasjahan
Part 03
Relena narrowed her eyes as the fierce rays of the afternoon sun burning
her eyes, and donned her black baseball cap as she rummaged her white
plastic bag for a pair of sunglasses. Her lips twitched in satisfaction
when her hand finally found what she was looking for. However, her smile
turned into frown, when she finally took a good look at the sunglasses.
It was Quatre's sunglasses. Turning the object in her hand, she
mused inwardly, wondering how it ended up in her bag. She eyed the
glinting wire rim and the blue lenses disinterestedly. Hers and Quatre's
style sure differed. Personally she preferred her plastic red framed and
yellow tinted sunglasses, but anything would do for her as long as they
served their purpose. In this case, she needed the sunglasses to protect
her identity and shield her eyes from the scorching sun.
Shrugging carelessly, Relena she donned the sunglasses. She lifted
an eyebrow as she caught her reflection on a display window by her side,
biting her lower lip as she brushed her bangs aside and scrutinised her
own reflection. The wire-framed sunglasses actually suited her look
albeit a little bit old fashioned.
Hefting her bag high below her arm, she smiled at her reflection
one more time before skipping to another direction. However, her feet
were frozen to the ground the moment she spotted a distinct reflection
of a man. Relena gasped involuntarily; her hands flew to cover her mouth.
Heero Yui. He was in town? Shopping alone? Unbelievable.
She could never believe her ill luck.
Quickly she turned her back on the reflection on the display window
and lowered her sunglasses before double-checking the figure standing
across the road. Her hands were shaking from both panic and excitement.
The man was definitely Heero Yui, although he seemed to be much
more at ease than the Heero she had encountered in the headquarters
every day, with one hand leaning casually against the traffic light and
the other holding several plastic bags. Silver plastic sunglasses
perched on the bridge of his nose, and he was out of his usual Preventer
uniform.
It was common knowledge that Heero was her old time flame, but –
God forgives her – she was engaged to Quatre Raberba Winner! Still, she
couldn't resist ogling Heero Yui. He reminded her of the past as she saw
him raking his windblown dark mousy hair; his lean figure looked
irresistible in the high-necked black sleeveless shirt and khakis. It
wasn't exactly his old dress code, but the image he produced brought her
back to last time they had spent together in the abandoned hangar.
Relena could feel a smile forming slowly on her mouth as she craned
her neck to get a better view of Heero. Relena could only sense aura of
relaxation from him, a trait that rarely appeared. Gone was the stealth
he applied on his every movement. He almost looked like an ordinary man.
A beautiful man, Heero Yui was.
He was also the same man who had refused her a few months ago,
claiming he loved and hated her at the same time. The same man who had
kissed her passionately, and yet leaving her empty and dissatisfied
after. The same man who had been her sole obsession since she was
fifteen, young and full of dreams, but lonely.
And the bastard, he was also the first to break his heart.
Relena stiffened at her own thought. She knew she would never
dismiss the memory completely, but she just never expected it to affect
her so strongly. Usually she managed to maintain civil if not friendly
atmosphere during the time they had to work together. So, why now?
"Aw, let's go!" she groaned. She was just being sentimental. Sure
the strange emotion would fade in a minute.
Relena commanded herself to move, but her legs wouldn't follow her
order. She placed the sunglasses back before her eyes, but they couldn't
stop spying on Heero. At least the young Preventer member was totally
oblivious of Relena's existence.
Or may be he wasn't.
After all, acute senses had always been in his nature, the perfect
soldier.
Relena gasped, cursing her own stupidity. She should have run when
she had the chance. Heero eventually looked up, a frown between his
brows, his strong hand lifting the sunglasses so they rested on top of
his head. A shudder ran through Relena's spine the moment his cobalt
blue eyes bored into her own baby blue ones. Heero's cold and steely
glare was not a new experience for her, but it still pierced her heart.
Relena narrowed her eyes in silent scrutiny. The muscles of his
face were hardened as recognition flashed in his eyes, but the display
of emotions ended there. Relena thought she had no reason to fear Heero,
but, as seconds were ticking by, she finally realised she did fear him
for his unpredictability.
Shaking her head ruefully, Relena let out a dry chuckle and threw
one arm in defeat. Heero Yui was definitely a hopeless case. She knew
what she would do. She would just have to play it cool, crossed the road
in a stride (where she supposed to be heading, anyway), greeted Heero
bravely and went her merry way. Yes, she would just do that.
Yet, she wouldn't budge from her spot although the crossing light
turned green, and then turned back into red. And neither did Heero.
She could see his fists tightened around the handles of his
shopping bags as he continued staring into the blueness of Relena's
crystal clear orbs. Relena stepped aback, her heart pumped wildly as she
became self-consciousness. She, Relena Peacecraft, who had hypnotised
her audience whenever she spoke, was frozen by a mere glance of a man.
It took her several seconds to calm her heart. By the time she
managed ignoring Heero's penetrating gaze, she was all teary and
exhausted…too drained to flee from him. She was a fool for believing
herself to be immune to his frightening gaze. Heero's gaze stripped her
soul barriers, leaving her with nothing to cover her most intimate
emotions.
Blinking away her tears, Relena clutched her bag close to her heart
and scuttled away to escape the vision of Heero Yui. She would not cross
the road. It was too risky for her sanity. Heero was still looking at
her – she realised this as she felt the hair on her nape pricked. It was
strange, but she thought she sensed thousands of undefined emotions she
had never witnessed before in Heero. She stopped on her track in a
moment of impetuosity, curiosity finally winning over as she whirled her
head to face him once again.
She never understood him. She thought he wanted her to go away; she
really thought he did. But when she looked into his eyes, there would
always be this naked, undefined emotion – one that finally forced her to
stay. It was always like that. And when she stayed, he refused. When she
left, he pleaded…silently. She didn't know anymore what he wanted of her.
She needed him to tell her.
------------------------------------------------
Heero's heart skipped a beat the moment he saw the lovely vision
before his eyes, suppressing the urge to chuckle at Relena's attempt to
hide her identity with a pair of sunglasses and a black baseball cap. It
would never work for him; he recognised her too well. Those slender
limbs, slim waist, beautiful golden tresses and the cherry red lips…the
way her hips swayed…everything about her screamed Relena Peacecraft to
him. She wasn't totally uncreative though. At least she managed to
deceive most of the civilians around her.
Heero was unable to take his eyes from her even as he was adjusting
the balance of his shopping bags and leant on his left hip, searching
for the most comfortable stance to continue his watching. The barest tug
at the corners of his lips formed a ghostly little smile as he regarded
her with hooded eyes. The smile became ironic when he saw Relena shifted
from foot to foot in discomfort.
She was marrying one of his comrades in a few months. Should he
feel regret, perhaps sadness? Or should he be happy? He had no idea. In
fact, he didn't have the slightest clue about what he was feeling inside.
He had driven Relena away from him, and yet he couldn't bring himself to
congratulate the brilliance of his own action and continue as if nothing
had happened in the past few months. After all, he believed he had
removed the obstacle of in his life.
Relena became extremely polite to him, and never again regarded him
with the warmth she reserved only for her close friends and relatives.
She never bothered him anymore, not even for a friendly chitchat. She
avoided him like a plague, only talking to him when necessary, and with,
he should say, much professionalism.
He supposed to be happy, but a pang of 'something' drove him insane
instead. It was an uncomfortable twinge at first, but it grew bigger and
bigger and sometimes it would distract him from work. Even worse, he
started making mistakes in his missions, which caused his reputation as
a perfect soldier to suffer.
He thought he was over with the love thing. He thought by
eliminating their relationship, he could set his life back on the right
track. He told the woman he had loved her, but also hated her to get rid
of everything that he believed bringing nothing but commotions.
Her face haunted him even in his waking hours. He swore she had had
him poisoned, and the poison lingered, refusing to leave his mind. He
changed; he was not his normal self anymore. But what was normal? He
never dared asking anybody and kept the secret to himself.
He tried sleeping pills, and yet Relena's face would always float
into his dreams. In the dream he was always mesmerised and reduced into
a dysfunctional person, unable to resist her charms. He always woke up
with sweat drenching his body, shaking with silent longing and those
undefined emotions. Guilt? Love? Again, he had no clue.
Against all odds, he started stealing glances at the beautiful
diplomat the moment he was sure she wasn't looking his way, even at work.
No matter how many times he looked at her, she was always bold and
strong and beautiful, her blue eyes blazing and sparkling with vivacity
as she impressed the older diplomats around her while getting her job
done efficiently at the same time.
However, at the moment he was looking at a different Relena – the
Relena outside their working environment. No designer suit, no make-up,
no intricately braided hair. Just Relena and plain Relena – a beautiful
and young single woman in the sky blue spaghetti strapped top and
bootleg jeans, her hair high in a ponytail.
He surprised himself when a genuine smile spread on his face. Not
quite a smirk, but a gentle one. Relena looked just like an ordinary
woman, and for a moment he could forget who and where he was. At that
moment he was just an ordinary man admiring an ordinary girl on an
uneventful day. May be he could forgo all restrictions and spoke to her
in a more civilised manner for today. Besides, Relena would soon marry
Quatre. A simple greeting wouldn't hurt.
The light finally turned green again, and he took a deep breath,
strengthening his resolution as he crossed the street purposely. His
hands were cold and clammy as he shifted his loads from hand to hand,
his heart hammering against his ribcage. All this excitement was new to
him, and he was giddy because of it. He was aware of the implications of
allowing his emotions to rule over his head, but he was willing to take
the risk.
He quickened his pace as he sensed her speeding away from him, her
nervous aura penetrating his senses. He pushed the milling people out of
his way, sending glares potent with his usual steel determination that
caused people to part voluntarily. He only had one mission in his head:
to catch up with Relena, whom he realised was just as afraid as him to
face each other. Nevertheless, he couldn't let her go because he must,
at all cost, clear up everything with Relena and at least settled on a
mutual understanding.
Today, just today, perhaps he was able to figure out what he
actually desired.