Diary of a Wapire

Authors Note: This story is being written by me and a friend. It's our first story on fanfiction so tell us everything we can improve of or any of our mistakes. Thanks.

19th July 1998

Today is my 14th birthday. My parents gave me a journal (this journal), then they proceeded to attempt killing each other again. I mean, Jeez! It's my birthday, can't they stop fighting for one day.

I mean I know it's in their nature to try and kill each other, (considering my mums a werewolf and my dads a vampire) but they should of thought about that before they conceived me.

I mean being drunk is not an excuse, can vampires even get drunk?

Well, I suppose they can if they drink some drunken guys blood.

I'm a son of a vampire and a werewolf; does that mean I'm a wapire or a vampolf?

Or is that just a gay vampire?

Well, I'm not gay, I don't think. I mean the gut that owns the ice-cream truck in town does have a pretty cute arse, but the woman who owns Barking café has great boobs too.

At the moment I'm in my room. I can hear my parents yelling and screaming from across the house, though I don't think there fighting any more, especially by the sound of the comments their screaming.

They must have forgotten, again, how sensitive and well attuned my senses are, but that's alright, I'm used to the sound of dogs barking.

Both my parents had a part in decorating my room.

Jeez! I don't know if it can be anymore mismatched.

Dad painted one half of my room black, with strips of red paint down the wall looking like blood. On that side of the room I also have a large coffin with velvet cushioning. Beside my coffin, a huge black stereo that only thumps out heart beats, and also a black bookshelf full of bottles of different types of blood e.g. Alligator, Kangaroo and Kitten.

On the other side of my room mum painted it yellow with bright blue paw prints leading up the wall. I also have a huge dog bed in the corner, a bookcase full of how to train your dog books and a pile of dog food cans in the corner (my favourite's Pedigree). And a small pink stereo that emits loud barking noises (don't ask me where she got it from).

At the moment I'm laying smack bang in the middle of my room (on carpeted floor where I frequently relive myself).

Well speaking of that, I'm feeling the need to relive myself and I'm feeling particularly hungry towards some pig blood, that I might mix in with some Pedigree. I'll right again tomorrow (that's if mum and dad haven't eaten one another yet).

Anyway, Chow, Bye, Wolf, Tsk, Whatever.

Authors Note: Like i said before this is my friends and i's first story on fanfiction so be as critic and cynic as possible so we can get better. We also would except names that you think our young Wapire should be called. Something that's funny or insulting towards both werewolf and/or vampire. The person who's name we chose will be written down in the next chapter at the bottom in the authors note ( if not wished to be acnologed please let us know).

We really Hope You Like It!