Fregley

Hi, I'm Fregley. I'm the chef and owner of Fregley's Restaurant. I'm great friends with Greg Heffley, but he doesn't ever visit, which is weird because I'm always sending him great coupons for my restaurant…

I get about five customers per day, which is a lot less than I expected. People seem to like fast food places and other things like that more than my restaurant. I don't get it, I mean doesn't my menu look appetizing?

SNACKERS

Mustardy ketchup sticks…...3.99

Ketchupy mustard sticks…3.99

Chicken bone….1.99

Grease nuggets….…..1.99

Scrambled eggshells…..…2.50

Mashed potato eyes…..2.99

Exploded battery omelet…9.99Battery acid soup….….8.50

PIZZA

Pencil shaving and booger pizza…5.99

Booger pizza…..4.50

Pencil shaving pizza…..…4.50

Soap pizza….…3.50

Toe jam pizza…..….3.99

Dead bug pizza…..…..6.99

Lollipop stick pizza…...….5.50

Plaque pizza…3.99

Eggshell pizza…4.50

Fingernail pizza….…3.50

SPECIALS

Day after Halloween special: Smashed Jack O' Lantern pie….12.50

Day after Christmas special: Crumpled wrapping paper salad….8.50

Day after Easter special: Stuffed Easter bunny roast with side of mashed potato eyes…14.99

Seriously, right? Every time I look at it, I want one of each!

Yeah, so outside of Fregley's, things are going pretty well. I have eight cats, which are all hairless. I have a one floor house, with a kitchen, a living room, a bathroom, and a bedroom, all of which have Greg Heffley wallpaper. The house has an eight foot front yard and a ten foot backyard. I have trees all over the backyard though, because I like it to blend in with the forest right behind it. I work at the local library when Fregley's isn't open, but I'm only a janitor and they never let me touch any of the books.

My favorite food is my very own battery acid soup, but it doesn't seem to agree with me for some reason… Anyway, my favorite drink is liquid dish soap, but that doesn't agree with me either. Strange, huh?

In my spare time, I like to call Greg Heffley and ask him to come over. He has never once answered. Again, strange! It's like he tries to avoid me or something! I also like to try and find him on the Internet, and actually try to find him in real life. I never do, though…

I'm in pretty good standing with money, I make about three hundred dollars every three months, and I only spend about one hundred of it.

Well, that's pretty much all I'd like to say about me. OH! RIGHT! I almost forgot. Wanna see my secret freckle?