So...it's been a while, hasn't it? College has been kicking my butt in these last few months, and so I haven't been writing as much as I used to. Which is a shame. I am sorry for this late update! And I know I said this story would be three chapters, but I'm just going to wrap it up here in case I get swamped with work again. This feels a little rushed for me, but I really don't want to leave you all hanging any longer. I can't really focus on writing on other stories if I have one that isn't finished. Again, sorry for the late update. You guys are the best!
Dean is a man. A very masculine and manly man. He likes blowing things up, shooting and killing as many nasty sons of bitches as he can, and he likes his car.
Scratch that. He loves his car.
Compared to him, Sam is a freaking woman. With his floppy hair and his emoticons, Sam is the epitome of everything uncool in Dean's book. Sam would rather talk about feelings. Dean would rather go to a bar and hustle the money out men two times his size. The point of all this is that Dean just isn't good at this whole…talking…thing. So when he steps outside of the motel room and sees Cas sitting on the curb with his elbows on his knees and his head propped on his hands as he looks forlornly across the parking lot , Dean seriously contemplates going back to Sam and telling him that everything is cool. Which would be a lie. A deep sigh from Cas accents the fact that everything is indeed not cool and Dean finds himself going over to his friend without a second thought. He sits down and they both stare out into the parking lot.
Dean realizes that it's kind of trippy sitting next to himself. This whole situation is messed up. First Cas gets turned into a freaking kitten, then they both get turned into dogs, and now this. What the hell is going on? All Dean wants is his body back. And yeah, the grace thing is pretty sweet, but being an angel is…weird. He has this constant funny feeling somewhere in his chest and no matter what he's doing, it's always there. It feels like some sort of pressure. It's faint, but strong enough for him to be aware of it. Plus, he just hates the fact that Cas is taller than him now.
And he has messy angel hair. So not cool.
After a few more moments of sitting in silence Dean figures he should say something.
"Uh…hey."
Dean almost smacks himself at his attempt. Really, it's not like he's talking to some hot chick. And even then he wouldn't be having this much trouble.
Cas looks at him briefly, but then he turns back to stare at a hot pink minivan. Dean drums his fingers along his thigh and decides to try again.
"So…uh, this situation sucks, doesn't it?"
Castiel nods. Slightly encouraged, Dean stretches out his legs, startling a little bit at seeing black slacks where faded jeans should be.
This really does suck.
"Look, I know this is difficult and all, but I'm sure we'll figure this out. I mean, what else can happen, right?" Dean searches Castiel's face, trying to read his expression. Usually Dean doesn't have a problem with that, but right now his friend's face is blank. He has no idea what the angel is thinking, and that's saying something because that's his face. Shouldn't he be able to read his own face? Right?
"Cas, come on. Talk to me. I know I'm not all about this touchy feely crap, but I want to know if you're pissed at me."
Castiel continues to sit there in silence, and Dean has a very strong suspicion that he would have chosen this moment to zap himself away to avoid this conversation.
"Cas –"
"I was beautiful once."
The angel's quiet voice cuts Dean off immediately. The hunter sits there staring at Cas, who is staring a some point far away in the distance, his gaze unfocused and bright. Dean looks away when the angel speaks again.
"I was glorious. I was powerful and infused with the grace given to me by my Father, and now look at me. I have thrown my Father's gift away." Cas turns then, and he stares at Dean in a somewhat pointed manner.
For you.
The unspoken words linger between them, and Dean swallows, suddenly uncomfortable under the angel's sudden scrutiny. He feels like Cas is taking some kind of inventory, like he's measuring all that he's given and lost for Dean and putting it up against his fading grace. The more time that passes the more uneasy Dean gets.
"Hey…it's not like this is permanent. Sammy will fix us and then you'll have your mojo back."
Cas snorts.
"Not for long. Pretty soon I will be reduced to…this." He gestures at himself. "I will be of no use to you anymore."
Realization finally dawns on Dean.
Cas is scared. Of being kicked out again. Of being shunned and barred from yet another family. Dean doesn't blame him. What if one day Sam suddenly decided that he didn't need Dean anymore? What if Sam hated him? Wanted to kill him? Dean wouldn't know what to do because that kid has been his life since he was born. It was always his job to look after Sam and that took priority over everything. Even if the sasquatch was a little bitch at times (okay, pretty much all the time), he was Dean's brother and neither of them would want to change that. But Cas doesn't have that anymore. He's lost it, thrown it away for a human and his pathetic attempt at saving the world. And that scares Dean, because that means he can't lose or Cas would have given all of that up for nothing.
"Cas. Look at me."
Blue eyes trail up to meet green and Dean feels it. This moment, right here in this no-name town, is important. Erasing the angel's doubts about his place in this dysfunctional family of theirs, making him feel like he belongs, it's all important. And even though this is approaching chick-flick territory rather quickly, Dean continues to keep eye contact in the hopes of willing his friend to understand.
"You are not some tool that Sam and I use whenever the situation calls for it. You've saved our asses more times than I can count, and I know it doesn't seem like it, but we are grateful. And if you think I'm just going to dump you by the side of the road whenever you lose your mojo, sorry to break it to you, but you don't know me very well, dude. Winchesters are a lifetime deal. You're stuck with us."
Phew. That was a lot more than he planned on saying. Really, that right there deserves an Oscar.
Throughout his little speech, Cas had not once looked away, instead he focused on Dean with that intense stare of his, seemingly contemplating what he was being told. When Dean finished he continued to sit there, staring at Dean.
Dean's eye twitches.
Cas stares.
An uneasy feeling begins to form in Dean's gut.
Then the tiniest of smiles graces the angel's lips and Dean decides he has never seen anything quite like it before.
And just like that, everything is fine.
Most of the day is spent doing research. Sam's typing away on his laptop, the tightness of his features the only thing illustrating his annoyance. Cas is sitting by the window and Dean flew himself off somewhere.
Okay, so most of Sam's day is spent doing research. He still doesn't understand the body swap. He checked everything over countless times and made sure he got every aspect of the antidote right. They should have been returned to normal. Sam sighs and blinks wearily, turning to look at Cas. The angel has been sitting there since he and Dean returned a few hours earlier. The two had seemed at peace with each other, so Sam assumed all went well.
Sam picks up a soft sigh from Castiel before the room erupts into chaos.
The door explodes off its hinges and bangs against the wall across from it. Sam leaps up and Castiel startles violently, his eyes narrowing on the three demons rushing into their room. He strides across the room to meet them halfway, his body tensed for a fight. It's only when he tries to call on his grace that he realizes his mistake.
Oops.
The demon, a gorgeous leggy blonde, smirks at Castiel before sending him crashing against the wall. The other two demons, brothers by their similar looks, circle Sam, leers on their faces. They leave a reasonable distance between themselves and Sam, seemingly awaiting orders from the female. Sam remembers Cas and he uses his peripheral vision to check on him, his body stiffening at the sight of seeing Cas pinned on the wall about a foot off the floor, completely helpless.
"Well, isn't this nice?" The female demon is standing next to Cas, her black eyes focused on Sam. The grin suddenly fades from her face and her features harden. "You need to come with us, Sam. You could be great if you give yourself to Lucifer."
"No." Sam's response is immediate and resolute. He stands his ground, staring the demon down. She shrugs.
"Okay. But I hate to see your brother here get hurt…" She trails off and Castiel's face tightens in an expression that Sam knows is used to mask pain. He knows that look more than any other.
"Stop it." Sam's voice is hard, his body tense.
"Or what? I heard you've stopped guzzling demon blood…you've got no juice to do anything and you know it." The demon's black eyes flicker back to a bright green, and her features soften. "Just give it up, Sam. Lucifer can give you so much if you just let him in," she coaxes. This change in demeanor only pisses Sam off. Castiel's features are still tight in pain, his hands clenched into fists.
"I'm warning you," Sam says lowly. "Let him go."
The demon laughs. "What are you going to do about it?"
"Oh, Sammy here won't be lifting a finger. That's my job." The attention of everyone in the room snaps the spot in front of the window. Dean is standing there, arms crossed over his chest, his trademark smirk in place. Only, it looks kind of weird, being Cas' face and all. Then his eyes glance over and he sees Cas. The reaction is immediate.
A terrible change overcomes him, contorting his features until everything that was Dean disappeared completely. He doesn't even look like Cas. He's something entirely different, ethereal and dangerous, and Sam feels the tiniest spark of fear because this is not Dean. Sam stumbles back when a gust of wind picks up in the room suddenly. Dean's arms are at his side, his head bowed slightly, glaring up at the demon, his expression livid. The lights in the room flicker and the massive shadow of angel wings appear along the walls, arching high to the ceiling. Dean closes his eyes, and a ripple of power shoots through the room, making the hair on the back of Sam's neck stand. Instinctively he looks at Cas, who is focused on Dean, something almost akin to awe on his features. Sam then looks at the demons and fights the urge to smirk. They look terrified. The two surrounding Sam begin to back away, and Sam gets the feeling they're about to leave their hosts any second now.
They don't even come close.
Dean's eyes snap open, and Sam is startled by the fierce blue glow emitting from them.
The last image Sam sees before the room erupts in a blinding light is the shadows of Dean's wings closing around him. He feels a soft brush of feathers and then the world fades from under his feet.
Sam lands on his ass in the dirt. He sits there for a moment, confused by his surroundings. A road is in front of him, and there is little vegetation, only dirt.
The middle of nowhere.
"C'mon, Sam. Get up."
Sam looks up and meets the eyes of Cas. Dean. Whatever. Sam rises to his feet and notices Cas standing by the road, looking around. The younger Winchester looks at Dean, noting that he looks normal. No glowing eyes, nothing abnormal. Sam frowns.
"What the hell was all of that?"
Dean looks startled at Sam's abrupt question. He grins sheepishly and scratches the back of his neck.
"Uh…I dunno."
Sam stares. Dean shrugs.
"What, you expected me to just let them kick both your asses? Not my style, man." He claps his hands together. "Now, how about we get some food? I could go for a beer."
Sam goggles at him.
"What do you mean you don't know? Did you see what you just did? Even Cas couldn't –" Dean's glare cuts him off. Sam glances at Cas and sees the slight hunch of his shoulders. Great, now he feels like a complete ass. "Look, Cas, you know I didn't –"
"It's fine, Sam." Cas says evenly. He turns to Dean. "We should go."
Dean nods, and the world fades again.
This time they appear in another motel room. Dean immediately goes to the fridge and emerges with two beers. He tosses one to Sam and pops the top on his own. Cas is standing off the side, a morose expression on his face. Dean opens his mouth, and then he shuts it abruptly. He drops his beer at the same time Cas' eyes widen.
"What's –" Sam begins, only to be cut off by a very familiar smoke surrounding Cas and Dean. Not again….
Little sparks of electricity crackle through the smoke and Sam watches with interest, fearing the results. What would it be this time? Gender switching? Sam gulps.
The smoke clears, revealing Cas and Dean in the same spots as they were, seemingly unchanged. They both look down at themselves and then at each other. Then Dean pumps a fist in the air.
"Fuck yes! I'm back, baby!"
A small smile graces Cas' features and he nods.
"It is great to be back to normal."
Everyone seems happy. Except for Sam. He's pissed.
"Hold on one goddamn minute!" He ignores the offended stare of Cas. "I've been working my ass off trying to cure you guys and then you're suddenly back to normal? You don't think that's, I don't know, suspicious?"
Dean shrugs, just happy to be back in his own body. "Not really."
"I think it is best not to look a gift-horse in the mouth, Sam."
Sam only gapes at the two of them. The he huffs and throws up his hands in defeat.
"Fine! But if you wake up and your head is connected to your ass, don't come crying to me!"
The answer to all Sam's questions appear to him the next morning. One hand is shoved under his pillow. He yawns and clenches his fist, immediately stilling when something in his hand…crunches? Sam pulls out his hand and opens it, blinking down in disbelief at the shiny object sitting innocently in his palm.
A chocolate bar wrapper. Sam is confused for about two seconds until the gears click into place in his head. His face scrunches up into his most epic of bitchfaces yet and his shriek could be heard from outside the motel.
"GABRIEL!"
Ha! It was Gabe all along! :D
Man, I miss his face...sigh. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it! Hopefully you will hear from me again very soon...