Disclaimer: The characters of Twilight are owned by Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended. All original content and characters of this story are the intellectual property of Virginia May, 2010.

SIRE:

I had to get away from him. I was so angry and so very hurt.

Why the heck was I hurt?

I shouldn't feel upset. So he claimed to be sorry for what he'd done, big deal. He couldn't possibly be sorry, I woke up alone. A vampire who had any kind of respect, or compassion for their prey would have at least made sure that they'd killed their meal. I don't care what the circumstances were. He chose to make me his prey. He bit me. He should have taken care of me. Whether that meant disposing of my body properly or caring for me after my change, I should have been his responsibility. It was my blood that had fed him, it was the least he could have done.

I continued to run, not knowing where I was going. I ran faster than I thought that I could, given how long it had been since I'd last had any blood in my system. So far, I couldn't hear the others pursuing me.

Would they pursue me? Would they follow and try to stop me? It seemed they had been trying to protect someone or something from me, but if the danger had passed then would they even care where I went or what happened to me?

I listened closely for footfalls, or branches rustling behind me. I knew of course that skilled vampires could pursue another without ever being detected. It had happened to me in the past. I'd been taken by surprise. For crying out loud, Alice and Jasper took me surprise earlier today.

I inhaled deeply, hoping not to find any traces of their scents, when it hit me: human blood. A lot of human blood. This was nothing like the strange sweet blood I caught wind of earlier, this was the real deal.

I felt my instincts taking over for the second time today. My feet became more sure, my eyes and ears focused on the prey lying somewhere in the forest ahead of me, and I began to plan my attack. I would need to be silent and swift.

As my feet carried my faster toward my goal, I became aware of a distinct presence behind me. It was one of my most basic instincts telling me that I was, in fact, being followed. My hunt was in jeopardy.

I let out a snarl and changed course, still pushing ahead with all the speed I had left.

"Lillie! Stop!" A muffled yell came from behind me. Hearing my own name tore at something in my subconscious. This was wrong.

My instincts fought back telling my body to run faster, to be sure footed and focus on the scent of the blood I sought. If I was going to protect my prey, I had to get there first.

The smell of human beings intensified and overwhelmed me. The nerve endings on my skin registered the presence of body heat and my ears filled with the sound of wet, pulsing blood.

I was close now. There were at least five, maybe six, warm bodies in the woods ahead.

I slowed and dropped to a crouch. My eyes worked in tandem to spot the object of the hunt. I crept through the trees, stalking and searching. I moved silently and tensed for the spring.

Even as I neared the most delicious sounding hearts and wet sloshing veins that I could imagine, somewhere inside of me was a girl who didn't want to do this. My body wanted the blood, but I, me, myself… I didn't want to do this. Not again. I didn't think I could do this again. It was too hard. It was too much to live with. I would experience the momentary rush of pleasure that came with extinguishing my thirst, only to be haunted by the memory of the lives I ended for all of eternity.

I stood up out of my crouch, even with the sound of heartbeats and the smell of the blood still intoxicating me, I stood. And then I cried out.

I was sooo thirsty.

My limbs shook, causing me to bend at the waist and brace my hands above my knees. I felt almost dizzy with thirst and want.

I heard the sounds the humans made as they walked through the forest just yards away from me now. I heard their boots against the dirt and rocks. I heard the song they sang and how one of them, a child perhaps, laughed and tried to whistle but it didn't quite come out.

Suddenly, I found myself lurching forward. I nearly stumbled trying to move towards the hunt and yet hold back at the same time. I grabbed onto a tree for support.

Fear and self-loathing overwhelmed me for what I was certainly bound to do. I could feel my body aching from the nearness of so much blood, blood I desperately needed. But still... I didn't want to do this.

"Come on, let's get you out of here," a soft voice whispered in my ear. Petite arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me back. I leaned into them and began trembling again. I turned and grabbed onto the arms holding me.

It was Alice.

"I can't," I moaned, not sure if I meant that I couldn't kill the humans, or that I couldn't walk away. Both were entirely true.

"I know, sweetie. Come on." Alice pulled on my arms a little and I took a tentative step with her. I looked into her eyes and saw only compassion.

My muscles locked down though, refusing to move away from the sustenance I needed. My trembles grew until I was shaking in Alice's arms with the restraint it took to resist.

"I can't," I whispered.

"Okay. Would you like help?" Alice asked.

I nodded. Alice was an inch or two shorter than me and petite, vampire or not, I wondered how she planned to help me get out of here.

"Emmett won't hurt you. He'll carry you until your safe though… if you want. Will you let him help you?"

I looked up, startled and slightly terrified. Emmett was huge and suddenly he was standing right behind me. I pulled against Alice's grip but she wasn't letting me go.

"Where's Jasper?" I asked, suddenly wishing for some very odd reason that he was the one who was helping me.

"Your thirst was overwhelming him, sweetie. He can feel that too. He's waiting for us about a mile back, though," Alice answered.

I nodded and looked over my shoulder at Emmett, who waved and smiled.

"Hi," he said, looking a little bashful. I couldn't help but smile a little at his sheepish greeting. How could anyone so huge be bashful? I looked at Alice again for a second, and then back at Emmett.

"Hi," I answered.

"You ready, small fry?" He looked at me expectantly, but made no move to approach me.

I nodded just as the wind shifted and I was assaulted once again by the strong smell of fresh human blood. I stiffened and squeezed down on Alice's arms.

"Okay, time to go. Emmett?" Alice extricated herself from my grip and thrust me into Emmett's arms.

I immediately began to feel panicked, but heard Alice and Emmett's muttered reassurances. Alice patted my back softly as soon as he had hold of me. The way they handled my caught me off guard as I clung to Emmett's thick neck. It was so unusual for vampires. Their gestures were tender and therefore unfamiliar.

Emmett started running, and I shut my eyes. My body protested this turn of events and I had to concentrate to resist the desire to get away and feed. I squeezed myself tighter around Emmett.

"It's okay. I got you," he comforted.

He adjusted me in his arms so that I could feel the power of his hold on me. I held on to his neck for dear life and inhaled his scent, trying to banish the smell of human blood from my system. His unique smell was still distinctly vampire, and though it soothed some of the shaking in my limbs, it did nothing to quench the raging fire at the back of my throat. I let out a low moan just thinking about it.

"Too tight?" Emmett asked.

I shook my head and rasped out a one-word response. "Thirsty."

Emmett didn't respond but I could tell that he had slowed down and was loosening his grip on me. I also noticed that the trembling had abated and I felt distinctively calm.

"Jasper?" I whispered into Emmett's neck.

"Yep," Emmett answered chuckling. "You noticed him messing with you, huh? He does that to all of us, so don't take it personally."

We ran for a while longer and I opened my eyes to see Jasper and Alice running on either side of us, hanging back from Emmett by a few yards. I caught Alice's eyes and she smiled at me yet again.

"We can stop now," Alice said when we'd reached a small clearing high in the hills. Emmett stopped running and put me down on my feet. He kept one hand on my shoulder, until I met his eyes and indicated that I was okay.

"Thank you," I said gratefully, and offered the gentle giant a smile. He patted me on the head and smiled back. I turned around to the rest of them, having just noticed that Rosalie was still with them. "Thanks, to all of you. I..."

I didn't know what to say, I had to be the first vampire in the history of the world who felt guilty for almost eating what we're supposed to eat. I wrapped my arms around my chest and looked down. Maybe these animal eaters could understand, but I didn't expect them to.

Jasper approached me slowly. "You don't have to feel guilty. We all have different reasons for living the way that we do, but we're vampires. You did nothing wrong. There is no need for you to feel ashamed."

I looked up, confused. "Then, why?"

"Because Alice said you would regret it. She said it would be horrible for you when you killed those hikers and you would end up suffering. She knew you would want help."

I hung my head, ashamed and yet still in pain, still wanting to feed and quench the thirst. It hurt too much. I reached up to clutch my throat and try to stifle the moan threatening to escape.

"We're going to help you with that if you'll let us," Jasper said quietly.

I wondered if his throat burned when mine did, or if his gift meant he just was aware that I was in pain. I kinda thought it was the former considering our earlier interactions. While I was pondering this, I felt a return of that odd sense of calm that I'd noticed earlier when Jasper had been holding me down. At the same time there was a slight ease to the burn in my throat, but not much. I raised my eyes to Jasper.

"Thank you," I whispered.

What I wanted to tell him was that I was sorry. I had thought that I wanted him to suffer like I did, but now that I knew he really could and would suffer with me...? I sighed. It was just different now, knowing that in some weird way we were in this together.

"Can I ask a question now?" I said quietly.

"What is it?"

"Well, earlier... In the tree and then after. Who were you protecting? Who are Nessie and Jake?"

The entire group bristled at my question.

Jasper cleared his throat. I thought it an odd thing to do, very human.

"They were in the wrong place at the wrong time. They're not important just now."

"But... one of them some sort of canine, right? And the other one, the girl? She's not exactly human, or is she? I'm confused."

"I know you are, but for now let's just concentrate on why it was we were waiting for you in that tree," Jasper answered.

I gasped. "You were waiting for me? Why? How?"

Alice walked up next to him and took Jasper's hand. "Lillie, I had a vision of you a few weeks ago. I saw you attacking those hikers and then trying to destroy yourself later. We came here to help you."

I was stunned at her words.

"Then you knew that I was his... that he was... my sire?" I asked, pointing to Jasper.

"No." She shook her head and frowned. "No, that was a surprise. I only saw that we were supposed to help you."

"Why?"

"Because you're alone and because you're lost."

"I do fine on my own," I responded, knowing it was a lie. My next words were the truth though. "I've had covens before and I don't care to be a plaything or a henchman."

"We're not a coven, Lillie. We're a family. We live as a family. We love each other as a family," Alice answered.

"Love?" I asked, incredulously. "Vampires don't love."

"Yes, we do," Jasper said with conviction. His expression told me he knew I was full of it.

"We really do," Alice agreed looking up into Jasper's eyes. I watched the intimacy of their gaze for only a moment before I had to look away.

"Well, that's great for you guys. Where do I fit in to that pretty picture?" I asked petulantly.

Rosalie snorted. "I'd like to know that myself."

I turned to face her. "Why are you here then? You obviously aren't happy with the situation?"

My question wasn't meant to be snide, I was sincerely curious.

"I'm here because my family decided to come get you. I do love them, but we don't always agree on everything. In this case, majority rules… So here I am."

"But you didn't want to come?"

Rosalie tossed her hair in a very human fashion and tried to look bored. "I thought it was dangerous. Our family is already large and conspicuous." She glared over my shoulder. "I don't think we can afford any mistakes. If you join us and you slip, exposing us… well-"

"That's enough for now, Rose," Alice chirped, ghosting to my side.

Rosalie shook her head. "No, she should know. You need to tell her before she decides."

"Tell me what?"

Alice sighed and took my hand. "My family and I would like to help you if you decide that you don't want to be alone or live like you do anymore. However, as Rose said, we are a large family and there was an issue with the Volturi a few years ago."

I gasped.

Alice cocked an eyebrow. "You know them?"

I shook my head. "Not really… I was in Italy once, that's all."

"Do they know you?" "Did you live there?" Jasper and Emmett's questions came one on top of the other.

I smiled lightly. "I didn't live there for more than two weeks. A… um, friend… was from Volterra. He brought me back to meet his brothers and the guard, but it didn't work out well for me there. I was asked to leave, so I did." I shrugged.

"Brothers?" Jasper asked, leaning closer. "Who was your friend?"

"I called him Uncle. His name was Marcus, his brothers are Aro and Cauis. I am not fond of them however, and I don't think they were fond of me."

"Why?" Rosalie asked, suddenly joining the little semi-circle we'd made.

"I knew things... sort of like Alice. I have a gift and I think they were concerned about me staying and learning too much about them."

Jasper groaned. "Ah, Edward should be here."

Who? Before I could ask, Jasper started questioning me. His eyes were kind, but worried.

"Had you noticed that they collect gifted vampires in Volterra? I find it surprising that they let you go from there."

I shook my head. I hadn't realized that anyone other than Uncle and Aro were gifted. But then, I didn't really care.

"If I may ask, what is your gift?" Jasper inquired.

I frowned, why did he want to know? I answered evasively. "It doesn't matter much. It's not anything that can hurt you."

"Please, little lady?" Jasper coaxed and pulled out some southern charm. I rolled my eyes, but he continued. "You can trust us. You already know about my gift and Alice's."

"Do they have gifts?" I pointed to Emmett and Rosalie.

"No," Jasper answered.

"Gifts are overrated. Normal is cool," Emmett remarked.

I smiled and met his gaze, then Jasper's. I felt my unease shift and dissipate. Jasper's gift, no doubt.

"Fine." I sighed. "I see memories. When I touch someone, I experience their memories."

It was silent for too long, causing me to still completely. Was that wrong? Was there something wrong with my talent?

Emmett spoke first. He sounded excited. "So... you're like Aro?"

I shook my head. "No. I'm not like Aro. My gift is limited to memories. I never hear the thoughts behind them, and I don't get all of a person's memories when I touch them. I can't really control what comes through when it happens either. I think it may have something to do with whatever you're concentrating on when I touch you."

"Cool," Emmett smiled. "Can we try it?"

"Emmett!" Jasper and Rosalie admonished him before I could deny his request. I had to stifle a smile at his chagrinned face.

"Sorry."

"S'okay," I said quietly.

Alice smiled and winked at me before facing her gigantic coven mate... err, brother.

"She doesn't like to be touched, Em. She can't control it, so she never knows what she'll have to be exposed to. For all we know, she could see something you really don't want her too, or something that will cause her pain."

"Oh." Emmett sounded disappointed.

I thought he was kind of cute about it, nobody had ever wanted to "play" with my talent before.

"Maybe sometime we can try it. Just not now. It's always more difficult when I need to feed." I shuddered at just how difficult it was.

Jasper's teeth ground together and he shot me a sympathetic look.

Alice put her arm around me at the same time and rubbed my back. "Don't think about it. Can you tell us real quick, when was the last time you had any contact with the Volturi?" she asked.

"A few weeks after V-E day. Uncle had us return to Italy as soon as the German's surrendered."

"World War Two?"

I nodded. "It was awful. The stench of war... And worse, the Volturi... The way they lured those people in with promises to end their suffering." I swallowed back the disgust. "I'll never go back."

"Will they come looking for you?" Rosalie asked sharply.

Alice shot her a look. "What she means to say is, do they keep track of you to your knowledge?"

"No. They wanted me gone, and I haven't come across any of the guard here in the States in decades. But then... I don't do anything to give them cause to come looking for me."

Emmett scoffed and Rosalie growled.

Alice patted my arm to comfort me. "Sometimes they don't need a reason."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

Jasper clasped his hands behind his back, and eyed me speculatively. "We are no longer in the favor of the Volturi , Lillie. They would use any excuse to try and destroy our family, even if they had to create a reason to justify it."

"Oh." I wondered what these vampires had done. "Is it because you drink from animals or because you stay in one place too long?"

There was a collective smattering of grunts, laughs and scoffs. Alice answered me though.

"No, sweetie. They picked a fight with us because they wanted several of our members for their own. They used the first available excuse that came along to demand that we serve them. Then they planned to dispose of the ones they didn't want."

My eyes grew wide. "Who did they want?"

"Me. Jasper. Our brother, Edward and his wife, Bella. And... there is one more in our family. One more unique than the rest of us. She is of particular interest to them."

"Nessie," I breathed. "The girl?"

Alice nodded.

"But that's so many... Was Aro jealous? Was he afraid of you? How large is your cov-, I mean, your family?"

Emmett laughed at my incredulity, while Alice answered sweetly. "Yes, Aro was jealous. No, he wasn't afraid of us, but that was before he lost. And to answer your final question... our family is quite large. There are ten of us now."

"Nine," argued Rosalie.

"Ten," the others challenged.

Rosalie scowled and mumbled something about mongrels under her breath.

"Am I... number ten?" I asked, not following the source of the disagreement.

"No, you would number eleven if you wanted to join us. But, it would be your choice," Alice answered.

"I'm not sure if that's really the case anymore, darlin," Jasper said. I wasn't sure if the term of endearment was directed at me or at Alice, but from the corner of my eye I could see her practically bouncing in place.

I swallowed loudly. Jasper's words and Alice's antics made me nervous.

"What do you mean?" I asked him.

Jasper tentatively brushed a piece of my honey colored hair away from my face. I noticed how careful he was not to touch my skin.

"You don't have to stay with us... but you're already a part of us, Lillie."

"I don't understand," I said, scrunching my brow in confusion.

"I'm your sire. That makes you my family now."

"I..." My voice left me. I wasn't sure how I felt about that.

"You're confused, I know. But no matter what you decide, I won't turn my back on you again. I am responsible for you. You're mine to protect and to care for just as much as Alice is. That's what it means to be family."

I blinked and looked around at each of them. Alice was glowing, Emmett winked at me, and Rosalie... well, Rose just stared back at me and shrugged. Glancing back at Jasper, I felt every ounce of his sincerity and concern for me.

"Let me help you, Lillie. I wasn't there for you when you woke up to this life, but I can be here for you now. Let me teach you to hunt free from the guilt that plagues you. Let me do for you now, what I couldn't do then."

With only a moment's consideration, I nodded slowly.

Jasper stepped forward, a slight smile playing at his lips. "Yes?" he asked.

I nodded again. "Yes."

Alice squealed and Jasper almost grinned, though not quite. "Alright then, little lady. Let's go," he drawled, turning towards the woods and waiting for me to join him.

I stood stock still, intimidated, with absolutely no idea how I was going to do what he wanted me to.

He raised an eyebrow at me. "You'll know what to do. You're thirsty aren't you?"

I cringed and ground my teeth together from the pain.

"That's what I thought," he chuckled. "Come on, Lillie. Just follow me and stay close."

~(~)~

Author's Notes:

This is the last completed chapter for now. (10/15/2010)

I have half of another chapter written, Lillie's first hunt with the Cullens, but it will not be completed until I get back on schedule with What Drives Her.

As always, your thoughts and feedback are much appreciated! :)