For those who have been a domestic violence victim and for those who know what it's like to be caught up in the cycle, I write this as a survivor. When I saw megan fox in the recent eminem video this bunny wouldn't leave me alone so in combining the video with transformers here goes. (watch the music video if your lost).

A month after Egypt Mikaela was sitting in the dark again by herself. Her boyfriend…fiance….her lover was in the other room fast asleep, sleeping the well earned sleep of a hero, and good guy. She'd been a hero too. She'd helped rescue the earth twice by his side always flying across the country to make sure he didn't die at the hands of some psychopathic Decepticon. And how she loved him. He was sweet, awkward and humble. He was so unlike all the others….

It kept her up at night. She was from the other side of town with a mother who drowned her pain in drugs and her father who made ends meet by stealing cars. Her mother was so drugged most nights or missing with god knew who and her father did his best to take care of her even had to bring her with him on his car thieving nights. No money for a babysitter had put her father in a difficult position, he hadn't wanted her to get involved or know what he was doing but from the time she was old enough to run she'd gone with him.

Once he'd been caught and she had been shuffled to different relatives houses while her father had served a year for car theft but it was his first offence and he'd come out early on parole. Her mother was finally found and was returned to her parent's custody upon the CPS's lackey deeming them worthy. Her father had just become more skilled at keeping her hidden then and a better thief but the second time he was caught she was eleven and young enough to go to juvy. And under even the threat of time in the detention center she never gave up her father and earned 4 months in facility and her father went free on a technicality. Her father was there every day and begged for her to tell them but there was honor among thieves no matter what others said.

The next time she was old enough to stay alone and when he was caught he was alone with and in knee deep with a car theft ring that left her fatherless since she was 15. He'd be gone for a long time this time. And she mourned for him not being able to be with him. In his way he'd taken care of her when her mother had been absent in every way. So in the house with her mother in and out and absent more than present, she raised herself and found consolation in other things.

She'd had boyfriends. Many as far as that goes. She was always with someone that seemed nice at first but they were always older or rough around the edges. She never had entered to give herself to any of them but after the first incident with a spiked drink and a hazy recollection of being used and throw away she figured there was no reason not to any more. Considering the statistics for her side of town she felt fortunate she'd made it to 15.

But now here she was in the middle of a life she was completely foreign to. A man who wanted her for her and all of her baggage and faults, temper and coolness. She didn't understand it at times and sometimes when she was held in his deceptively thin arms that held a strength she didn't know he'd possessed. They protected her and treated her like fragile glass as she was built like the American man's dream he worshipped her. But he worshipped her soul as well as her body caring for her every need emotionally and otherwise. And there was no lows in this life but there were no intense highs either…

Sitting in the dark she didn't know what she was missing. She couldn't think of anything she needed or wanted for. But there that was it wasn't it? There was no strife as well as no extreme reconciliations there was no need. How did people live this life? How did people exist in this middle ground? She wanted this she craved this! But the mediocrity of this suburban middle class life left her empty. It was no wonder she loved Sam. He met the ultimate evil and triumphed in his calm way with his quiet strength that receded to the background once it was no longer needed. His steadfastedness saw them through both near death experiences and continued as they lived their lives as they began to settle into this placid routine. Even with the Autobots and giant alien robots around there was peace.

She didn't know when or if there would be another encounter in their lifetime with the Decepticons. But maybe that's why it had been so easy to think about leaving Sam before he left for college there had been such a lull in activity that Optimus even had seen no reason to have Bumblebee follow Sam to college. How wrong he had been, but what else could there be to fight over? Her father was back and she had so much to see to. She couldn't live this life forever. There was so much pulling her back to the shop to help her father get back to a normal life as well as maybe feeling normal herself. She wanted to love Sam and stay here in his arms and revel in the peace that surrounded their day to day life but the peace might just drive her insane…

She left a note on the night stand it was only midnight. It would be another good six hours before Sam would turn over and throw an arm over to her side of the bed and wonder where the soft warm "angel" as he had frequently called her was. The small blue truck that she'd come very attached to the last month sat in his alt mode recharging as deeply as Sam slept. She stepped around his small body quietly. She left via the back door and looked out and noticed that there was a different car in the driveway. Jolt if she wasn't mistaken. He had no real interest in the humans or no real knowledge of their habits and goings on this would work in her favor. Bumblebee must have been called to meet with Optimus for some reason or another he'd fill them in on in the morning. But the never left the two alone anymore. As she walked passed him she heard a voice come from the rolled down window.

"Mikaela?" said the tentative male voice from the speakers. She cursed in her head but answered.

"Yeah?"

"It's highly irregular for humans to meander the thoroughfare at nocturnal hours," he stated. She took a few seconds to find an answer that wouldn't have him alerting anyone to her activities.

"Well, Jolt, I'm kinda restless and I can't sleep I'm just gonna take a walk to maybe clear my head and tire my self out. I might be out for a while." Jolt was quiet for a moment presumable to look up information on the internet.

"Should I call Ratchet and advise him of your ailments?"

She almost jumped out of her skin but remained calm. "No thanks I'm gonna go for a walk." She answered again.

"Very well, do you have your communication device to be reached or call for assistance incase of danger?"

She nodded holding up her cell phone and kept walking. He didn't follow her. One down and not to many to go. She just had to put some distance between her and the safe house in which they stayed for the time being until the world at large was fed lies to cover up the existence of aliens. She walked and a few minutes after she was out of sight of the house she threw her phone in a dumpster in the back of a store and kept walking.

Her feet began to hurt two hours into her trek and she wondered if anyone had been alerted to her absence. If Bumblebee was back he would know… Sam would be worried and probably devastated. The pain she thought she'd be causing Sam was almost enough to turn back… Almost but not enough. Not enough to curb the nauseating prospect of never feeling like she belonged or that things were normal, for her anyway. Never once did she think that talking about her feelings or getting some help would help her feelings of restlessness. But that wasn't the way she had been taught to deal with things, her way was to act and that's what she thought she had done. It didn't matter she had helped save the earth, Sam deserved someone who could give him the same care he gave her and right now she couldn't give him that, not damaged the way she was.

So she kept walking and when her feet started hurting she stood at the entrance to the highway and thumbed a ride to the first person who would give her a ride anywhere but where she was. The driver was a man in his early forties that was torn between worrying about her like he would about his daughters or lusting after her like the sex restricted middle aged man he was. He settled on the fatherly attitude after seeing her face, a mask of dark clouds and despair. He asked only once what was wrong but she sat there silently. He didn't try again. He finally asked if she wanted a place to stay for the night and that his wife wouldn't mind if he brought her home. She laughed mirthlessly. He was trying to be noble and fatherly but she didn't want to cause any distention in this poor man's home and turned down his offer and he let her off at the local bus depot. She had taken a few thousand dollars that she'd had when she had gone to get Sam. She paid for a ticket heading south and didn't care of the destination.

Once she stepped of the bus she walked to a Wal-Mart open all night and bought a throw away phone and a few changes of clothes. She registered it under an alias. She thought about calling her father on it but then knew the bots would trace her. So she used a pay calling card she'd bought at a pay phone instead. She couldn't imagine them being able to trace that not as easily.

"Dad?" she asked as he picked up the phone blearily.

"Mik? Is that you?"

"Yeah, Dad listen. Your gonna have to run the shop by yourself for a while…. I'm…" she didn't know what to tell him.

"Mik what did you do? What about that boy you ran off to help? What happened did he hurt you? I swear Mik if he…" she cut him off.

"NO Dad no… He is perfect… To perfect. I couldn't stay Dad. We… we been through so much together and he's wonderful and perfect and I can't…" her words were broken as she tried to not cry.

"Oh Mik, Don't do that. You aughta go back hun. He's good to you. He was good to you when I couldn't be baby. Please sweetheart, I know it's not like it was but you can…" she cut him off again.

"No Daddy! I can't. I don't know when I'll call you again. We have lots of very good and overprotective friends. They are wonderful and awesome people dad so if they come looking for me well you can tell them honestly you don't know where I am… bye dad, I love you.." she hung up before he could say anything else. She looked at the phone she'd snapped shut and let the tears fall. She was stupid. She'd runaway from the greatest thing in her life and now there wasn't any turning back. They'd never forgive her now. "Please forgive me Sam. I'm sorry" she said to herself as she began walking again. She finally found a motel in whatever smaller town on the outskirts of some larger metro area. She rented a room under another alias and paid cash. She'd been traveling or walking all night and in the first rays of the morning she slipped into a deep sleep.

The front desk called a few hours later about 11 am and asked if she'd be staying another night. She was annoyed to say the least. "Well I would have if I could've slept another few hours but since I'm UP now no thank you." She slammed the phone down and gathered her meager belongings and put on a fresh outfit and left the room and didn't look back.

So she walked the first hour she was angry and it drove her fast pace. Next she was annoyed that she was still tired. She was then hungry and decided to grab something to eat at a local denny's and sat down to eat something since she hadn't since the night before. A few eggs, pancakes, and sausage later her hunger was sated but her foul temper wasn't. She sat there long after her meal was finished staring at her plate not knowing where to go next. The waitress had refilled her diet coke three times and it was very slow this time on a week day as it was now about three.

The waitress watched her for about the last hour recognizing that look. She didn't know her story but didn't have to. That little girl lost had no where to go and no means of which to find a place either. She didn't know how long she'd be able to support herself on whatever she had on her but the waitress had been there before and some nice woman had helped her and it was time to pay it forward.

"Hey sweety," the blond plump pushing forties woman said. Mikaela looked up at her.

"Yes? Have I been here too long?" she asked finally focusing on the waitress.

"No sweety you haven't. I just wondered if you needed anything?" the blonde woman held out the offering, it was up to the girl to take it now. Mikaela then laughed.

"Yeah, I need a brain. A life…." She sighed then.

"Yes, that's exactly what it looks like too."

"That obvious?" Mikaela sighed again.

"Yes, and if you want it my cousin works down at the bar two streets over and three up and is looking for a girl to help out…" she smiled. Mikaela looked at her for a minute. "No strings attached. You could work for cash under the table," she added in a whisper.

"How did you…?" the waitress smiled.

"Been there dear. Now get on down there before the close. I'll call her an tell her to expect you. And meals on me." The waitress said still smiling.

"But I can…"

"Wouldn't hear of it now off with you go find something to do with yourself." And with that a job had dropped itself in her lap. After making her way over there by cab she had a part time job as a waitress in a run down bar on the less attractive side of town. This was what she wanted wasn't it? This is what she left for the things she was familiar with? She sighed thinking about starting in three days. She'd need to find a place to stay for a while. She'd think about that once she got tired. There were plenty of places to rent a room for cheap in the area.

She decided to find out what else was around this place that seemed be making itself her home. IT was only late afternoon and she could probably do with something to eat and maybe a drink or two. It might dull the painful throbbing in her chest that became sharper as her life seemed to settle itself in this community away from everything that had been good. So she settled on another bar with a restruant attached to it a few streets away from her new job and ate a small meal and began to drink a beer with her meal. But a beer lead to a few more. The hours ticked by and she found her way to the bar. She began knocking back the harder stuff as the area around her filled with new faces.

She knew she shouldn't drink as much as she had. Especially not in a new place with new people she didn't know and she knew she was becoming more loose with every swig. But it was so nice to be numb. The warmth was pulling the stabbing pain in her chest back into a dull ache and soon she was laughing with a few people at the bar exchanging conversation and giggles. The large man next to her white with his head shaved and dark eyes was the most interactive with her. He bought her a few rounds and as the night wore on she noticed he had some attractive tattoos and he seemed nice. But didn't they all seem nice at first?

She had drinken to much and was way to drunk to make it to anywhere to spend the night. Her vision was going fuzzy and she was having a hard time remembering anything one minute to the next. It had felt so good to be free of the pain and what had caused it she couldn't remember. The man who was next to was being so nice. He looked at her with a soft smile.

"Hey there sweetheart, I think you had enough you're gonna fall over," he told her. There wasn't a real leer to his look but he knew the agreement in that statement. It meant that he'd assumed responsibility for the tipsy woman and he'd take her home so no other man with worse intentions would take her home, and the other end of the deal if she answered and accepted his dominance over her amount of alcohol she consumed she'd go home with him and she'd sleep with him. She smiled at him and debated in her foggy mind whether or not to answer.

She giggled. "I think your right" she slurred. She couldn't remember that she'd actually drunk that much. He smiled kindly at her and put an arm around her waist.

"You gotta place to go tonight?" he asked in a deceptive gentalmenly way. She knew that even if she did he wouldn't take her there.

"No, I'm new in town…was gonna go to a motel," she thought brokenly.

"Well new in town you gotta name to go with those blue eyes?"

"Mikaela" she said.

"Mikaela," he repeated. His hold tightened a little on her waist. "Let's go Mikaela. You look like you could use a place to crash." She giggled again and let him help her off her chair and to the door. The bar tender watched them leave and shook his head. He was about to say something and then figured it was none of his damn business. If they were old enough to get drunk they were old enough to know better and he wasn't about to loose a good regular customer over the possibility of what he MIGHT do to her. There had only been allegations of abuse none of the charges ever stuck so he shrugged and continued to fill the glasses of his patrons.

TO BE CONTINUED

dont kill me the evil energizer bunny wouldnt leave me alone! NOT MY FAULT. If you like it review I'm more likely to continue.